Read 2 Shorts, a Novella and a Haiku Walk Into a Bar Page 3

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  "Hey," I nod at Chin. The greens are crowded today. Great. The sun is warm enough. Guess everyone's ready for summer.

  "Hey, where's Barlow?" He's already at the nexus. Shit, he's going to beat me again.

  "Who are you fighting?" Damn, his fingers are nimble. He's got that guy dancing.

  "Ali."

  I can't focus right now. She's all up in my head. What was her flipping name again? I gotta listen better. "See the new babe?" That finally gets him to stop. He gives me that little grin of his. Yeah, he's seen her. "What's her name again?"

  "Mrs Chin?" He's playing again. I'm focusing better than I thought because I can see him. I'm going to attack. I don't know how else to beat him.

  "You wish." I can see my life with her is going to be hard. I need to start taking martial arts again. They all want her. I mean who wouldn't. "Hey, that's not fair."

  "And attacking me was?" Chin has the funniest giggle. "Anyway, she is hotness."

  "Good luck introducing her to your parents." He's Chinese. Highly, traditionally, parent's directly off the boat Chinese. He'd have a better shot of them accepting a kangaroo than her.

  "Yeah." I hit a nerve because I'm landing some good blows.

  "Sorry." I feel bad. We've all got family demons.

  He tosses his gamer down. "Yeah, whatever. I gotta go. Comin'?"

  I shake my head. "Study hall."

  "Right, later."

  I forget to nod because that damn South American gang is whomping on me right now. Shit. Fuck. Damn. I'm dead. I hate this game. Time to go back to Halo. I should go get my civics books. I forgot to read. Mr Anderson is due for a pop quiz. It's a long way away. Why don't I bring my stuff with me?

  "Frederick?"

  Where did she come from? Crap. How do I look? Is there green shit in my teeth? Get it together, Nelson. Get. It. Together.

  "Nelson is fine." Did I say that outloud? She hasn't responded. Could she hear me? I should look up. Oh, those legs, they're perfect. Oh, slow the breath, slow it. Ok, ok, don't look up. Get control, Nelson. She's going to report you to the perv line.

  "Ok, Nelson." She drops hard next to me and a billow of her perfect perfume floats over. What is that - liquid awesomeness? I should ask her what perfume that is. Girls like that. No, wait, she might think I like girls’ perfume. Stay cool, she'll speak again and I can just answer whatever her question is. "So you wanna go over Trig?"

  "Uh, umm, now?" That was good. Not too bad. My face is hot. Must be the sun.

  "Yeah, if you're free. You feel ok? You're all red.”

  That hair. Those eyes. Her smell. Her legs. Sounds like a song. I should write her a song. I need to dig out my guitar from the closet. It's only been a few years. I could learn again. I'm a fast learner. Girls like it when you write them songs. I think.

  "Uhh, I am? Must be the heat." She laughs and it sounds like beautiful bells in a European Cathedral at Christmas time. Wow, Nelson, way to femme up. But I need to make her laugh again. It sends a chill through me.

  "It's fifty-five degrees out. Not exactly hot."

  "Uhh, yeah, guess not. So, ummm, my notes. I-I gotta get them from my locker." She smiles at me expectantly. Wow, her smile. Her skin is so smooth. I should smile back. Wait! I stop my lips in mid smile. Do I have green shit in my teeth? Don't smile, Nelson.

  She gives me a funny look. "What was that?"

  "What?" I'm looking at the dead grass again.

  "I don't know. You looked weird. Like a smile turned into a sneer."

  That's what that looked like. Huh. "Yeah, umm, I was going to get my civics book. I could get my notebook." A wind catches a tuft of her hair and floats it across her face. I should sweep it away. Move arm, move. My arm won't move. I think all my muscles are locked.

  "Ok, I'll go with." She bounces up. She bounces in all the right places.

  "Ok." I'm not as fast getting up. She's going to walk with me? Why couldn't this happen at lunchtime when everyone was out? Thankfulness Nelson. Right? At least she's walking with you. I'll take her the long way. We'll walk past the classes that look out into the courtyard.

  "So you been at St Paul's awhile?" She's so calm and beautiful. She takes the longest strides. Her kilt separates a little showing that soft thigh. Calm down Nelson. Focus. What's her name? How do I figure that out without asking her?

  "Since kindergarten." Wow, lame. I bet she's been all over the world, a new school every year. It would be awesome to reinvent myself into something other than a loser.

  "That's cool." She smiles over at the benches and I look over to see Brad waving at her. She notices me noticing that. "He's nice."

  "Yeah." For a Neanderthal, I guess.

  "He and I went to nursery school together."

  Dinglehead went to school with her? She's from here? "You did?"

  "Yeah, at Lahoe-Hance."

  "Oh, you're from here?" Ok finally got a question out. Adding to the conversation.

  "Yeah, why?"

  "Nothing, no reason." Other than you are perfection that can't possibly be from here. What sort of crime did you commit to end up here?

  "Ok, yeah, well all my life. I was at Sacred Heart before. My parents finally gave me a break. They said if I finished sophomore year with A's they'd let me transfer to a coed. It took until now to get them to make good on the deal."

  "Oh." It's almost disappointing but then she touches me and I lose control of my legs for a minute.

  "Come with me. I need to grab some things from my locker. My next class is about to start." She tugs a little. I should take her hand and entwine my fingers with hers. Maybe kiss the back of it. Would that be too much? I gotta stop reading mom's romance novels. The sex isn't even that great. Except for that Christian dude. That one was pretty good.