Carmen finally inquired, “Well, do you mean that it’s just superficial? Do you mean that he hasn’t been able to find his match because he always picks women who can’t or don’t understand him and they leave? It’s so hard to put a finger on it. I suppose I should speak about myself, but we’ve only been on one date. I’m sure it’ll take a little time for us to see if we’re good for each other.”
Sally didn’t say another word. It appeared to Carmen that Sally wasn’t even sure what she meant about a good woman. The only thing that crossed Sally’s face was that she wanted something to say about Cavanaugh’s romantic life, but also to bring attention to some terrible scars from someone who was definitely the opposite of a good woman in Sally’s mind. Sally may have crossed a boundary by telling Carmen something so personal and painful.
Carmen picked up the pieces and said, “You know, I know it’s hard to talk about. I don’t expect that we can just automatically know a person’s past with one discussion. I know I’ve made a few errors and wondered a few times what I was looking for in a man. It’s a tough call. You don’t have to say anything.”
Sometimes, however, no matter how much time you took to work on yourself or on being the best partner, the other person’s wounds were still too fresh to make it a good relationship, no matter how good the woman. Maybe Sally had forgotten what it was like to date strangers and how they have to unravel pains and sorrows to find new potential and let their own chemistry flow. Unfortunately, Carmen would need to broach the subject with Cavanaugh before she even fell more head over heels.
Chapter Seven
After Cavanaugh finished riding the three bulls at the rodeo, he’d finished with a two-ride score of 177 with a final round score of 87.75 on a bull named Impulse Buy. He checked his phone seeing a text from Carmen asking to meet. He welcomed seeing her and couldn’t wait to talk her about the Rodeo. Not a bad payout either with $1,426 coming to him. He got into his truck to meet Carmen. I wonder if she will be wearing her cowboy hat.
He wondered for a minute if she’d recently been in a relationship. Maybe, it had something to do with why she couldn’t watch him at the rodeo again. Or was it her job? He figured that she saw so many riders take a tumble; maybe she was fine just taking a day away and tending to Tad. It wasn’t something he could relate to, because there wasn’t a morning that he didn’t want to rush over and practice and prepare. Still, she wasn’t a circuit rider. As part of the support staff, they didn’t get any of the attention, but had to deal with all the problems. It could actually be pretty thankless work. He loved the guts, glory and attention. Now, he was hoping he might give Carmen a bit of that attention.
He walked into the Grille and saw her sitting at the same table they sat at last night.
He walked up and smirked, “Did we just establish that we have an ‘our table’?”
She answered, “That’s right.”
There she was. In all of her glory, Carmen gave him the type of thrill that he couldn’t get from bull riding. It was that peaceful easy feeling that made his palette wet.
Bull riders rarely avoided a single moment of their lives. Here was one of those unavoidable moments that Cavanaugh wasn’t going to let slip past him.
Cavanaugh suggested, “Well, we could carve in our initials.”
“I’d rather we wait for a beautiful tree out in the countryside,” she recommended.
Cavanaugh said, “Well, you just read my mind. I was hoping you’d take a backwoods trip with me. After I order some food, I was going to talk to you about some beautiful spots. Help you get your mind off Tad and maybe off my riding.”
She exclaimed, “Well, you walked in in one piece, so it must have been successful rodeo!”
Cavanaugh notified, “I did alright.” He ordered some drinks and some food.
Carmen looked concerned and Cavanaugh didn’t want to miss an opportunity to get to know her, and the source of the worry on her face.
Cavanaugh double-checked, “Why the frown? Didn’t like that I remembered the drink you ordered?”
Carmen said, “I appreciate that you remember what I ordered. That’s very sweet of you.” She seemed very hesitant to let him in. Carmen weighed her options. If she told him what his mother brought up and why she called him to have drinks with him, he might wonder why his mother was meddling when they’d only been on one date. It was also possible that Cavanaugh might change the subject and talk about the hike tomorrow and dismiss his mom as overbearing. She often didn’t try to get a feel for the mom with someone she just wanted to get to know first, but this was an unusual situation.
It was possible that she wasn’t going to do the right thing and she had a pretty strong feeling that Cavanaugh was well on his way to considering anything his mother said. Carmen figured that Cavanaugh’s love life might have been a distraction for Sally.
Carmen might be helping Tad in ways his mother couldn’t and maybe Sally felt she had to make sure that Carmen didn’t also overpower Cavanaugh.
Cavanaugh pressed, “Well, what’s the fuss. Something is bothering you. I haven’t known you that long, but I do know that you have a wonderful smile. You look distant and my ego can’t stand the thought of you sitting there without a smile on your face.”
Carmen smiled and said, “I don’t even know where to start.”
Cavanaugh sat quietly as the food arrived. Not a single person would complain about having a date with Cavanaugh, so Carmen really did need to speak up so that Cavanaugh didn’t think it was something he said or did.
She took a bite of her burger. “Cavanaugh, your mom told me yesterday that you had a bad relationship with a woman recently and, well, she’s just making sure you find yourself a good woman. I was a little uncomfortable when she approached me after I helped Tad, but I slept on it and I think I understand. She knows that healing takes time. I certainly don’t want to walk into this situation blindly, and maybe hurt you when you’re still mending. I like you, but…”
Cavanaugh interrupted, “Oh stop right there. I figured my mom might say something. I just didn’t think it would be so sudden and soon. She’s been so worried about Tad and she didn’t know that I, well, wanted to date again. She always likes to think that she’d be the first person I go to if I were to strike up an interest in a woman. Sometimes I have, so she wouldn’t be that out of line.”
Carmen smiled and said, “You think she’s out of line?”
Cavanaugh said, “It’s very possible. Changes the mood a bit don’t you think? It’s one of the many reasons I sometimes don’t tell her personal things. I came home last night and dropped your name and she knew right away that we’d spent a little time alone. I didn’t think she would make anything of it, since she saw you helping Tad. Now, I’m thinking she might think your trying to mend up both her sons.” He paused, “Carmen, I did have a rocky relationship, but that’s in the past. I can tell you a little about Sam, my ex. She gets my blood boiling. She’s basically a princess. I don’t know what I was thinking at the time.”
Carmen said, “That’s often how relationships are. Look, I don’t really want to hear everything about her. I think you’re mom’s concern is fair, you and I will get to know if we’re good for each other. Nothing we can do about the past. I just worry…”
He interrupted and said, “I’m not still seeing Sam and she is not invited back into my life. If I saw her anywhere around the rodeo, I’d pretty much avoid her. She’s got nothing but bad intentions.”
Carmen said, “I’m only concerned about jealous exes and pissing off moms. I think your mom will get to know me in due time and I don’t want to rush things. I don’t want to give her the wrong idea that I’m somehow supposed to make up for your ex’s failures.”
Cavanaugh determined indulgently, “Leave it to my mom to make things difficult.”
Carmen carefully said, “She’s just worried about her heart and yours.”
Cavanaugh laughed and agonized, “You do heart surgery also?
”
“Not a chance. But I’m thinking your melting my heart the way you look tonight,” Carmen mentioned.
Cavanaugh smiled distressingly, “There are at least twenty stitches you might just need to remove Carmen, as you’re breaking my heart and I need a doctor. Doctor, doctor!”
Carmen volunteered, “I’ve got a few remedies. Although I can’t just apply them in the middle of a bar. You might think I just administer care anywhere. If the situation were an emergency, I might, but I think this might be something that demands a little TLC.”
“I’m not sure about you, but this place is starting to feel a little cramped,” Cavanaugh steered.
Cavanaugh left money on the table and they walked out. They stood out on the balcony overlooking the square. Cavanaugh put his hand in the small of Carmen’s back. Carmen felt like she’d never been touched near her waist before. He pulled her firmly towards him like she imagined he pulled himself out of the chute, firmly and decisively. The gentleness of his fingers evoked in her a deep longing that transported her out of the little town in Georgia, and into the dark pools of his eyes. They looked at each other up close for a long time feeling the pulse between them. The heat of their gaze developed a yearning that they both enjoyed; Carmen hoped the feeling never passed. Her reaction was proportionate to the look he gave her.
The kiss wasn’t to be felt rapidly, rather they sizzled in the parted lips, the racing, the rich withheld moans, and the hint of burning that seared them in place. Her breath grew shallower and she couldn’t come to her senses. There was no time to inhale and exhaling might cool the heat and remove their mutual desire to be bound by confusion. The eruption might be too much for two pairs of lips as her cheeks and his fought with their minds’ desires to reveal to each other what stirred underneath. There were rarely any reasons to stay so patient.
Most feelings like the one that ran through them would overtake, but they loved the built up pressure. It felt a lot like walking near a cliff’s edge and dangling one foot over the valley below then loosing your balance for a moment, only to get so steady the next moment that all that was left was the feeling, but you knew the ground was firm.
The point of no return happened just as Carmen grabbed his strong forearm and slowly traced with her nail a line between a few of his gorgeous freckles. His skin couldn’t stand it anymore. He pulled her firmly towards himself as their parted lips rubbed gently against each other with only minimal contact. Their breath pushed their lips further away from each other and only when they stopped breathing could they seal the kiss.
They kissed as if they had stood on two different train platforms all of their lives missing their connections. Here they were on the same platform standing on a balcony overlooking one of the quaintest beautiful squares in the world in Dahlonega, Georgia. It was the same feeling they had the first time they met on the day that Tad and Cavanaugh were visiting and she’d barged in. Except now, Carmen’s medical profession mattered very little and all that mattered was that she felt like the best woman in the whole world wearing a cowboy hat and dusty snakeskin boots that she’d worn into Sally’s house a couple of times. She should have known better, but she’d have to buy that new pair coming up sometime next week.
Chapter Eight
White pines and sugar maples dotted the northern Georgia Mountains. Neither of them cared about tics, bugs, spiders, although both of them packed bug spray just in case the other might have forgotten. Off Route 19, there was a sweet hiker hostel that Cavanaugh figured Carmen never tried out. If she did, it wouldn’t have been that great without him in tow anyway. It wasn’t much to look at, but it was a one room hideaway for a bull rider and a rodeo medic that both needed some TLC.
He wondered what kind of trees fascinated her and what smells got her excited in the great outdoors. He loved the familiar scents of dogwoods, rhododendrons and mountain laurel. He even brought a trail guide that pointed out special things about the hike.
She got in his truck. The tree next to his truck produced beautiful magnolia blooms and the citrusy smell puffed out like Cavanaugh’s chest as he closed the passenger door. She felt like the combination of both of them made for an incredibly intoxicating moment, although when he got back in the truck, she unintentionally stared at him. Her tunnel vision caused of course by feeling sensually overwhelmed.
She didn’t often let her emotions get the best of her, but at the moment it felt great to be flooded by the feeling that maybe someday he’d nibble a raspberry from her clavicle. Or dip her back on a late evening when the sun felt unbearable and instead of falling down from heat exhaustion, they both savored the heat and laid on a field of cool grass until the grass no longer felt comforting. She certainly wasn’t a lawn expert, but she knew intuitively that on a hot day you could develop heat stroke while sitting still on a couch, but you felt amazing walking barefoot in the grass, dirt or sand.
Mesmerized, she imagined cooling down with him on these nights. His voice broke the hypnotic gaze.
“I hope you don’t mind, I’d love to stop at the Chattahoochee River first and have lunch. Have you ever grabbed some sweetgum leaves and rubbed it between your fingers?” He asked like he was a nature tour guide.
She answered amused, “No, I haven’t.”
He glistened, “It’s got such a sweet smell.”
She added, “We might even see a cardinal flower since it blooms in July. The red flowers look like hundreds of lips to me.”
He said, “I…” Then paused, and looked at her lips. He pulled his truck over. Gave her a slow luxurious kiss and said, “There ought to be a cardinal rule about what sort of lips make the most beautiful flowers. I vote for yours.”
She blushed. Then said, “Well, let’s compare when we see the cardinal flower. I wouldn’t mind setting you side by side.”
When they arrived at the river, Cavanaugh opened up the back of his truck and pulled out the cooler. He grabbed a beer and asked if she wanted one. They lay in the back of the truck bed chatting about the sky and the way they used to come here as kids. They shared their ridiculous antics and some of the hazing both of them had endured in groups of friends.
Cavanaugh and Carmen didn’t even try to conceal from each other how good they felt together laying there sharing their dreams, hopes and memories. The air was hot, thick and stifling, but they weren’t picking peaches or sitting at the rodeo.
“Who was the first rodeo star,” he asked her while playing with some grass.
“Before or after standardized rules,” she asked back.
“That was in 1936. Cowboy’s Turtle Association, which was formed because of the nasty treatment of cowboys in previous rodeos. That made bull riding popular. It’s now the PRCA.”
“Good one. Who was the medicine man who introduced sports medicine to the world of rodeo in the early 80s when all they would offer was two six-packs?”
He beamed, “Doctor, I’m about to not only fail that question but also pull one out that’s going to stump you right back.”
She said proudly, “Dr. Pat Evans. Thank you very much.”
He held her feet to the fire, “Hey, but you didn’t tell me who the first rodeo star was.”
She maintained, “You stumped me.” She grabbed a hold of her knee and crossed it over her other leg.
He thought out loud, “Well supposedly the first recorded rodeo was in Arizona, Wyoming or Colorado in 1864, depending on who you ask. It was bull fighting before that. They didn’t earn money in the early days of the rodeos. It wasn’t until Cody made it famous and added money as an incentive. There are a few names floating around from then, but Johnie Schneider was the first official world champion bull rider in the 1920s.”
She asked, “And if you were around then, would you have ridden?”
He answered, “I dare say I would. You know he wrote cowboy poems too?”
She delighted, “I wouldn’t be surprised. The Wild West has many fine poets and I’ve always appreciated the
way they see the world around them.”
He charmed, “Okay, here’s one of my poems, I’ll just make it up right now.
The rise of the hill and my hard working hands,
Made the long road a practice of solitude.
As I smelled the dry grass I wasn’t fooled
Around every corner of the prairie,
I couldn’t help but feel the day soak through but I wasn’t wary
I listened to every word the sky had to say,
I heard every word that hill explained through my horse’s play,
And the creak of my saddle and the thunder of hooves
Set the thought of the campfire and coffee and comfort like grooves,
Into my mind like the beauty of a beautiful lady.
And if I wasn’t so ornery I might have missed the steady
Sound of the next bend, the hill is a great friend.”
Carmen was enchanted. She tucked in her chin then looked up at Cavanaugh and said, “Maybe we should get out of the back of this truck and find that sweet gum?”
If she hadn’t said something, it was possible they might not even make it to see anything but the back of that truck. Cavanaugh took the hint. He’d seduced her and now they needed to save that for later. He leaned over to get a quick kiss and jumped out of the back of the truck. He helped her out of the back of the truck and tossed the cooler, and latched the truck door.
They walked along the river quietly taking in the feeling of their hike and the enjoyment that they felt in each other’s company. A comfort whirred between them. She wanted to jump out of her skin a few times. Her steady walk felt balmy although really she felt like she was skipping and swaying. She moistened her lips and bit down. She didn’t want to throw caution to the wind, but there was no turning back and her desire for him built as Cavanaugh shared this beautiful path with her on this hot Georgia day. The pace of their hiking was inconsistent with the pace throbbing in her heart. She wanted to move fast, and then realized these were the first heaves of wanting know everything about Cavanaugh.