Got called in to work. Won’t be by tonight.
I rushed inside, wondering what the late-night meeting was about, while hoping I wasn’t the last one to arrive. I hated being late. Even if it was a last-minute thing I’d just heard about, I still hated feeling like I was running behind anyone else. I’d come into this job later in life, and I think that made me appreciate it more.
I’d chosen this job, and after years of working with Brock at his painting business, it had taken everything I had in me to follow this dream. Knowing I’d be disappointing Brock killed me, but this was something I had to do for myself. So I wanted to be the best at it that I could be. Give it my all and do everything above board and by the book.
I wasn’t going to fuck this up.
“There he is,” I heard Doobie shout out as I rounded the corner into the briefing room.
I stopped in my tracks when I saw the room filled with everyone who worked at the station. There was a two-layer cake, some poorly wrapped presents, and a large balloon that said “Suck me” tied to a chair at the head of the table.
“What the hell’s this?” I asked, my eyes narrowing as I took it all in.
“Happy Birthday, Irish,” my old field training officer, Smitty, said, his voice deep and gravely.
“It’s your first one with us here at DPD, and we had to celebrate in style,” Marsha, the dispatcher, said.
I looked at the clock on the wall, which read 12:04, then back at my co-workers as I tried to hide my shock.
“Nice threads,” Doobie said with a grin as he took in my well-worn jeans and sleeveless Whiskey Heat T-shirt. “Sorry to drag you away from all the ladies. You can go get laid after we have cake and hit the bar for some brewskies.”
“How old are you now? Twenty-five?” Smitty asked.
“Twenty-eight,” I replied, shutting my mouth tightly as I walked around to the chair they were all urging me toward.
I felt emotion rising within me, but fought it back the best I could.
As they all sang, I thought back to my birthdays when I was little, and the way my parents always made a big deal out them. For me, Brock, and Brendan, there’d always be a special breakfast, our favorite dinner, and homemade cake. After they died, Brock kept those traditions alive and always did what he could to make our birthdays special. Now, we always got together with everyone and celebrated with our now extended family.
But this … a group of people that I didn’t know just over a year ago, coming together in the middle of the night to do something special for me, a rookie cop? I felt something I’d never felt before. A sense of comradery. A feeling of acceptance and family that had nothing to do with blood or marriage, and everything to do with group of strangers who worked together toward the same goals, for the same purpose.
I choked down the emotion and worked to keep my expression bland, but as I made my wish and blew out the candles, I gave them all a tight smile and said, “Thanks.”
“Jeez, Irish, turn off the waterworks, you’re embarrassing us,” Doobie teased. Teasing was his specialty. Along with talking, joking, and goofing off. “Now slice up that cake so we can go out and get hammered.”
I chuckled as I cut up thick slices and put them on the blue paper plates, then I sat down and took a bite.
German Chocolate. My favorite.
“This is great,” I said, meaning it as I finished my piece in three more bites.
“Marsha made it,” Smitty said, and I turned to say thanks to the older woman, who was smiling broadly, a slight blush to her cheeks.
Marsha looked like what you would think of when you heard the word Grandma, but she’d never been married or had any kids. She often said the boys at the station were her kids, and had been working in her position as a dispatcher for the last forty years.
“Thanks, Marsha, it’s delicious,” I said, lifting my chin as I licked my fork.
“You’re welcome,” she replied, then looked around at all of the empty plates and added, “Now, off with the lot of you. I need to go home and get some beauty sleep.”
Everyone rose and did what Marsha said, clearing their plates as they left, not wanting to incur her wrath if a mess was left behind.
“Who’s up for a beer?” Doobie asked, and when everyone made noises of agreement, I felt warmth spread through me. “C’mon, birthday boy, you can leave your baby behind and ride with me. I’ll be your DD tonight.”
“Thanks, Ty,” I replied, even though I knew I wouldn’t have too many drinks tonight. I was on shift tomorrow and then had my birthday dinner at Brock and Victoria’s tomorrow night.
“Anytime, partner,” he said, and the warmth settled in my gut.
Chapter Four ~ Ming
To say I’d been disappointed when Brady texted me that he wasn’t coming over last night would be an understatement, but, unfortunately, I was used to it.
At least I’d gotten a good night’s sleep and had made it into work extra early. I was making great headway on my current case, and was hopeful that this would be the one that secured me a position as partner in my firm.
I was one of, if not the, best prosecutors in town. I knew it, my peers knew it, and the partners knew it, and I was ready to finally achieve a goal that had been set for me by my parents since I was old enough to say the word lawyer.
“I’m running out to grab a quick bite,” I told my assistant, checking the clock as I pushed through the double doors and waited for the elevator.
It was Brady’s birthday, and even though our relationship wasn’t the type where we celebrated milestones or even exchanged Christmas presents, I’d seen the perfect gift in town and just had to get it for him.
Bronagh had invited me to his birthday party at Brock’s. I was lucky to have been brought into their family, along with Bronagh, when she and Brendan got together, so I was always invited to all of their family gatherings.
I couldn’t deny that it stung when Brady didn’t invite me. It didn’t surprise me, but it did make me feel less than welcome, since it was his day they were celebrating. So, I told myself that I’d stop in, wish him Happy Birthday, and say hello to everyone, then make my excuses to leave.
If Brady actually wanted me there, I assumed he’d say something, and I didn’t want to crash his party. But since I also didn’t want to be rude to my friends, I’d take the gift. I did want to see him on his birthday, after all.
After picking up his present, I grabbed a sandwich then headed back to the office and once again submersed myself in work.
A throat clearing in my doorway had me looking up from my notes. One of my co-workers, Christian, was leaning against the doorjamb, his hands in the pockets of his expensive suit.
“Ah … A couple of us were going to go out for drinks later. Thought I’d see if you wanted to come along,” he said, looking uncharacteristically nervous.
I took in his perfectly styled hair and well-toned body, and thought how pleased my parents would be if I brought a man like him home. Of course, they’d like it more if he were Japanese, but liked to think of themselves as progressive parents. Christian had the looks, the style, the successful white collar job, and was probably a couple years older than me.
The total package.
“Thanks,” I replied with a small smile and shake of my head. “I have a party to attend for a friend, then I’ve got some more work to do.”
Christian tried to hide his disappointment, but I saw it flash across his features. He’d been inviting me out for a few weeks now, and I’d always made excuses for why I couldn’t go. As he nodded and turned to leave, I wondered if I was making a mistake not accepting his offer.
He was someone I not only had a lot in common with, but a man who was obviously interested in getting to know me better.
Even as the thought flitted through my head, I shook it out. I wasn’t ready to give up what I had with Brady yet, even if it was purely sexual.
I was so caught up in what I was doing that I was surprised to look
up and see it was already after six in the evening. I left my paperwork sprawled out where it was, eager not to move anything I needed when I was in such a good groove, and grabbed Brady’s present before locking my office behind me.
Our floor was quieter than usual, with most of the staff already gone for the day, but I could still see lights burning in a few of the offices of level 1 and level 2 lawyers, associates, and partners. More than likely, most of them would still be burning when I returned later that night.
Being a lawyer was definitely not a nine-to-five job; you had to do it because you loved it or you’d get burnt out fast.
I noted all the usual cars as I parked outside of Brock and Victoria’s Spanish-style home. Brady’s car wasn’t there, but he lived just down the street, so he probably walked. No, I’d never been invited to his house, but that didn’t mean I’d never driven by and seen it from the outside. Not in a stalkery way, of course, but I passed it on my way out of the neighborhood. Simply logistics.
At least, that’s what I’d told myself…
I knocked on the door, then laughed as the door swung open and Brendan threw his arms around me.
“How’s my second wife doing?” he joked as he pulled me into the house. “Ready to move in with me and Bronagh and become her sister-wife yet?”
When I started laughing he added, “You know, with the baby coming and all, we could really use the help.”
I slapped his chest playfully as Bronagh came up and wrapped her arm around his waist.
“What are you going to do when Ming takes you up on that offer, huh?” she asked him with a smile.
I looked him pointedly up and down and kept my face straight.
“Yeah, I don’t think you have the stamina to keep us both happy in bed.”
“Challenge accepted,” Brendan said with a grin, then let out an oomph when Bronagh elbowed him in the stomach.
“We talking threesomes?” TJ said as he joined our little huddle by the door.
“Apparently Ming’s a hell-cat in the sack,” Brendan replied, and this time I balled my fist and punched him in the stomach.
We were all laughing when our huddle split and I walked farther inside, only to stop in my tracks when I saw Brady standing next to Brock. A beer in his hand and his dark eyes locked on me.
I didn’t let that glare stop me, instead I moved right toward him and tip-toed up to kiss him on the cheek.
“Happy Birthday, Brady.”
His gaze followed me as I stood back on my flat feet and placed the long, heavy gift bag in his hand, then turned to give Brock a hug hello.
“Hey, Ming-a-ling, what have you been up to? I feel like we haven’t seen you in forever,” Brock said with a sweet smile. His was a mountain of a man. Tall and broad, with a full beard, longish hair, and the kindest face I’d ever seen.
I swear, I hated that nickname all through middle school, but when Brock said it, it was like being on the receiving end of a special hug. One that only he could give. It felt like acceptance.
“I know, Big Daddy,” I replied with a grin when his eyes narrowed at the name I used to tease him back with. “I’ve got a big case, and it’s been taking up all my time. In fact, I’m only here for a minute. I’ve got to get back to the grind.”
“You work too hard,” Victoria said as she walked up to us. The picture of elegance and poise, Victoria reminded me a lot of my mother. She and Brock were perfect opposites and their contrasts looked really good on both of them.
“I know, but I promise I’ll be here for the New Year’s Eve party.”
“We’re going to hold you to that,” Victoria said, then her expression turned unbearably sweet when Brock pulled her in tight and kissed her reverently on the forehead.
I nodded then moved across the room to where Shelly, Sasha, and Gaby were all sitting.
“Hey, guys, I have to get going, but I wanted to let you know that Cass and I are getting together to start planning the baby shower, and I’ll let you all know as soon as we have a date locked in.”
I turned back to make sure Bronagh was still on the other side of the house, smiling when I saw her and Brendan chatting with Brady, the three of them laughing together.
“Oh, yay!” Shelly said, looking young and fresh with her dark hair pulled back into a high tail. “Let me know if you need any help.”
“I will, thanks.”
I waved and said my “good-byes” as I headed for the door.
“Ming.”
I stopped with my hand on the doorknob, then turned to see Brady standing behind me, the drumstick chandelier I’d given him hanging from his hand.
Smiling shyly, I said, “It’s a chandelier, and those are all signed by different drummers. I thought about you as soon as I saw it.”
“Thanks,” he said, his expression unreadable as always. “It’s a badass gift.”
Pleasure rushed through me at his words.
“I’m glad you like it,” I replied, then after a second added, “Well, I have to get back to work.”
“Thank you,” he said again, then turned and walked back toward his family.
I opened the door and walked outside when I heard Brady say, “Hey, Bren, I bet you twenty that Brock gets distracted and burns the steak again.”
“You’re on,” Brendan replied, then I heard Victoria add, “I’ll take that bet.”
“Hey,” was all I heard Brock reply before the door shut behind me.
As I walked to my car I looked back behind me, and in the window I could see Brock, Victoria, Brady, Brendan, and Bronagh, all laughing and gesturing toward each other, and I wanted so badly to be one of them. To belong in that group, to that family. To take my place at Brady’s side and be the sixth member of their team.
But just as I yearned for it, I knew it wasn’t what Brady wanted. It wasn’t how he saw me. To him I was a temporary person in his life. A stepping stone to meeting the woman who would one day be his wife.
And as I pulled away from the curb and headed back toward my office, I wondered how much longer I’d be satisfied with being a stepping stone.
Chapter Five ~ Brady
You Up?
I shot a text to Ming on the off chance she’d still be awake. We’d both been working a lot, so I hadn’t seen her since my birthday, and it had been a couple weeks since I’d been to her house.
We weren’t dating, so we didn’t chat throughout the week about our day, or what we were doing. We’d agreed to sleep exclusively with each other, but we were free to date whoever we wanted. If either of us found someone that we wanted to get more serious with, we said we’d let each other know, and that would be the end of our arrangement.
This had worked for us for over seven months, but sometimes when we went this long without seeing each other, I wondered if there were any other guys working to take my place in Ming’s bed.
There was no denying she was hot, with that long dark hair and porcelain skin. Plus, she worked out in the mornings, so her body was tight.
All she had going on on the outside, combined with her intelligence and the fact that she was a successful lawyer … I’d honestly thought she’d find someone else months ago.
I shouldn’t have been surprise to see her come to Brock’s for my birthday. She usually came to every celebration my family had, but still, sometimes it was a little awkward since no one knew about us.
I’d felt a little bit annoyed when I first saw her, then jealous about Brendan and TJ joking with her about sex. When she gave me those drumsticks, I was surprised at how well she knew me, and then I’d been disappointed when she had to go back to work right away.
I didn’t know what the fuck was wrong with me, but I’d thrown myself into work to try and forget all of the stupid feelings that were confusing my brain. It hadn’t really worked, and now I wanted to see her.
I guess I missed her, since we hadn’t been a part for this long since we started up together.
Yeah, come on by.
Ye
s! I rose from the couch where I’d been pretending to watch a football game and searched around for my jacket.
One of the reasons I always went to Ming’s place and never had her over, was that I’m a fucking slob.
I don’t know why. Brock is pretty neat, and Brendan only becomes a pig when he’s caught up writing music, but I’ve always been messy.
I threw yesterday’s jeans across the room to grab the jacket underneath and shrugged it on. Then I started the process of finding my keys.
Not in the kitchen.
Not in my bedroom.
Shit, I really need to clean up…
Score!
I grabbed my keys off of the bathroom sink and rushed out of the house to jump into my Chevelle.
Ming’s loft wasn’t that far from my house. Downtown and a few short blocks from her law office, Bronagh had told me Ming picked it out so that she could walk to work when it was warm outside.
Most of the things I knew about Ming, I’d heard from Bronagh. Not because I asked, but because Bronagh loved to talk. She had no problem carrying on a one-sided conversation with me; she did it all the time. Since I’d started hooking up with Ming, I hadn’t minded as much. I could find out stuff about her without asking myself, and making her think that what we had would turn into something more. It was better if we kept things simple, the way we’d agreed.
I didn’t want to hurt her, but I was afraid it was inevitable.
Even without me prying into her life, or us spending time with each other out of bed, I saw the way Ming looked at me. It wasn’t simply with infatuation anymore, and I knew I needed to make a decision.
Let her go, or move forward and give her more.
I didn’t want to let her go. I enjoyed our time together. But something was holding me back … Maybe myself? I really didn’t know how to open myself up to a woman the same way I did to my family. Family was always going to be there, but women seemed to come and go.
I shook those thoughts out of my head as I bounded up the stairs to Ming’s loft. As always, when I turned the handle I found she’d left it open for me.