The weeks went by and I soon discovered that I really did like living with August. He was clean and he gave me my space. He was also easy to talk with. When I felt lonely and my heart ached for Ari, August was there for me. We got into the routine of getting coffee at Camden Bar and Kitchen. Sometimes we would walk down together and sit and do school work, but when I was feeling especially blue, and couldn’t face going out, August always offered to go fetch my java for me.
One day, when he came back with my drink, I was sitting perched up in the window seat. I didn’t even notice that he had returned until he started yelling at me.
“Ava! What is wrong with you? I have been sitting here talking to you for five minutes and you haven’t said a word!”
“I’m sorry August; my mind must have been somewhere else.”
“So, what is it? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Well, the same stuff I guess. Ari’s birthday is next week and I just want to go home.”
“So go home, Ava – go visit and then come back or something.”
“It’s not that easy, and I know if I leave here I will never come back.” I had remained vague on the issue of why I was even in London in the first place, and he understood that the issue was not up for discussion.
“So… if you broke up with him, why do you even care?”
“I don’t know; it’s not really like that. I broke up with him because I had no other choice.”
I closed my eyes and concentrated on breathing in and out, pushing back the onslaught of tears. “You should have seen his face when I told him I had to go; it haunts my sleep at night.”
“Do you still love him?”
“You know I do.”
“Does he love you, Ava?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “I think so; the selfish part of me hopes so.”
“That’s not selfish. You are an amazing person and you deserve love; quit treating yourself so poorly.”
“You think too highly of me. I am being selfish by keeping you here with me. If you were smart you’d leave, and if I were the nice person you think I am, I would send you away for good.”
“I have said it before, and I will say it again, you are a complete psycho, Ava, but I love you. And I don’t think you can just ignore his birthday. So what are you going to do?”
“I don’t know. I have no ideas. Nothing I could give Ari would be good enough.”
August grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my seat.
“I have a great idea, but first you need to do something with yourself. You look like shit, my dear. I love you, but you are in desperate need of a shower and a comb.”
I shot August a nasty look but did what he said. Actually, a shower sounded very welcoming. I cleaned up and grabbed my makeup bag that had sunk to the bottom of my luggage from disuse. I had never unpacked and when I did laundry, I folded my clothes up and packed them back in my bag instead of in the closet. The only item in the closet was Ari’s shirt. August was more at home in the flat than I ever would be. I had broken down once and gone in to the London baio. I had no choice; most of my clothes sagged on my frame.
Though the end of March was near, the weather was still cold, so I put on some jeans, my tall leather riding boots, a sweater, my black Burberry trench coat and a red pashmina.
I followed August out and onto the crowded streets of London. An entire day of walking and shopping later, I had found a whole pile of gifts for Ari: A Belstaff tour master jacket from Pelican & Parrots, vintage vinyl records for his extensive collection of favorite bands from Rough Trade and a creepy, two-headed teddy bear from The Last Tuesday Society …
I got Ari nineteen gifts all together and while we shopped, August took pictures all throughout London. We went into the best cake shop, Konditor & Cook, and I ordered their signature magic cake. The cake is made up of little squares that are then arranged to spell out words. I had them do nineteen squares, each in black and white and each embellished with either an X or an O. The bakery assured me the cake would be delivered to Ari precisely on his birthday. We headed back to the apartment and I stocked up on enough postal boxes to send each gift separately. The FEDEX guy was going to hate me, but my plan was worth it.
At the flat, I started to wrap the gifts while August put all of his pictures together and designed a different card for each present. Soon he left for the photo shop down the street. When he got back, he had nineteen different cards, each showing a different busy and popular location in London. I appeared somewhere in each card, blended into the various scenes, and when stacked all together, the cards made up an ingenious Where’s Waldo? birthday card game.
The game actually was really hard; if not for my red pashmina, I wouldn’t have been able to find myself in more than half of the pictures. What August had done with these cards was perfect. I signed each one with a simple “XO” and we packed them inside with the gifts and walked them down to be shipped out to California. I had them all sent to Aggie’s house. Ari’s birthday was on Saturday so I knew he would be home to receive them. I had a nervous feeling. I wasn’t sure if I had done the right thing. What if he had moved on and found someone else? I couldn’t bear the thought so I pushed it back to the corner of my mind and moved on to homework.
The next Thursday, August announced that we would be taking a boat cruise on The Thames River. I crossed my arms across my chest and downright refused.
“I don’t do boats, August. Pick something else or leave.”
August flopped down on the couch in disappointment. “Fine Ava, what would you like to do today?”
“What about nothing?” I answered. We had already seen Westminster Abbey, Windsor Castle, St. Paul’s Cathedral, The Globe and the Hampton Court Palace. I had been on a double decker bus more times than I cared to think about. August had dragged me to Madame Tussaud’s. I had had a freak out on the London Eye and screeched through the London Bridge Experience.
“Not happening, Ava; we are going to do something.”
“Stonehenge?” I smiled. I could do stones; there was nothing threatening about that.
We spent the morning on the train, then paid a visit to Stonehenge. August bought me a souvenir, I bought lunch and we rode the train home. It was a nice, quiet and normal day spent with a friend. It was a nice break from rain and sadness.