“I’m not sure if I’ve ever been proud,” I whispered, staring at the red wine, like blood in a cup. “However, I have been grateful.”
“Grateful?”
“Yeah.” It was the truth. “I thought about it a million times. You could have asked grandfather for support. With Shamus on your side, you would have gotten the Irish support. You had the Irish wife, the birthright, the ability…they could have followed you. If they had, Olivia would never have gotten greedy; she’d have been happy to be the next head of the house and that would have been that. The moment Father was gone, you could have killed me with ease.”
“Huh.” He drank.
“Say huh, one more time—”
“This is the reason why I could never be the leader. My mind doesn’t work like that. You’ve thought of how I could be Ceann na Conairte a million times. Just a simple alliance here, murder your brother there. No biggie. You thought of that, probably with ease too. Meanwhile, I’m just trying to keep myself alive and not embarrass our family. I’m the point and shoot guy. You don’t make the point and shoot guy the Ceann na Conairte.”
He said it like it was that clean cut. “You were supposed to have all of this, Neal. The title, the power, everything; how could I not think you wanted this?”
“We’re different. All I’ve ever wanted was my family safe. A little respect and to live in more luxury than I could ever want…I have all that. Why more? See, you don’t think that way, you think I can have the world if I just clear a few bodies. I can’t explain to you why I am this way. I am. That’s it. We are a peacock and a raven.”
“So what do I do if I have two sons who are the same? What do I do if both Wyatt and Ethan don’t naturally sort out like we did?”
He shrugged. “You have two choices: pray that you are dead before they choose to kill each other, or make it hard for them to live without one another while you are still alive,”
Easier said than done.
TWELVE
“I sustain myself with the love of family.”
~ Maya Angelou
CORA
When my driver opened the door for me, the very last person I expected to see standing in front of Merry West Hospital with a tulip in hand was Declan, dressed in casual jeans and a dark blue button-down shirt, along with his leather jacket.
“What are you doing here?”
He handed me the yellow and red tulip with one hand and reached up with the other, brushing my hair behind my ears.
“I know,” he stated.
“You know?” What?
“Cora, I love you.” The smile he was forcing slowly fell from his lips. “I love you more than I thought it was humanly possible to love anyone, which is why when I realized you were hiding something from me I was hurt and confused…but I realized you love me, too. That’s why you didn’t tell me your cancer was back…and it’s okay. I get it. I wish you had, but I understand why you didn’t. However, that doesn’t change the fact that I know, and it doesn’t change anything, except for the fact that I’m going to be right beside you. You and I are going to fight this and win, just like we did in the past.”
I stared at him in amazement…and I was positive I fell in love with him all over again. I had no clue what I’d done to deserve him, but I would do it again. I would do anything for him.
Reaching up, I placed my hand on his cheek. “I’m sorry—”
“Cora, it’s fine—”
“I’m sorry because,” I repeated again, cutting him off. “I made you worry when I don’t have cancer.”
He was about to cut in when he paused, his eyebrows coming together in confusion as he gawked at me.
“What?”
“I’m as cancer-free as I was last year and the year before. I’m healthy and cancer-free,” I repeated.
“Wait, but Evelyn said the hospital called about you starting chemo tomorrow and you’re here today for blood work…”
“Not me, my cousin.” I hadn’t wanted to tell him because I didn’t want to talk about Imani ever again with him, not after the hell she put us all through. “She has cancer. I’m paying for it and acting as her emergency contact. She’s been calling me for weeks and honestly it’s driving me insane. I kind of hoped I’d help her get better and she’d just accept it without digging up the past. That’s why I came tonight.”
He wrapped his arms around me and took a deep breath. “Thank fucking Jesus bloody Christ.”
He laughed so hard I shook with him, wrapping my arms around his chest.
“I still get to keep the tulip right?” I asked against him.
“You can have whatever you want…” He broke away slightly. “As long as you promise never to keep secrets from me again.”
I held my pinky figure out. “I promise to never keep big secrets from my devilishly handsome husband ever again but reserve the right to have tiny secrets here and there for his own good.”
His eyebrow raised and he grinned, locking his pinky with mine. “I can live with that.”
“Are you going to come in with me? To see Imani, I mean?” I asked, and he stiffened.
“Sorry,” he said, even though he didn’t mean it. “I know she is your family and despite everything she has done you will do what you think is right, but I’m not as forgiving as you, love. Those who cross you or me are never welcomed back. It’s just the way I am. But go we can have dinner after you’re done.”
There was no point arguing; that was just how Declan was. He didn’t believe in forgiving outsiders.
“I’ll be right back.” I kissed his cheek before going around him. He stood there and waved until I could no longer see him, then I focused on the hospital around me.
I made it to the elevator as it was opening, and sure enough, there was Imani. Her brown hair was shaved, exposing her bald head, and even her eyebrows were gone.
“Cora?” She smiled at me as if we were old friends, and for some reason staring at her bothered me… Is this how I looked back then?
“Imani?”
“Shocking right?” She rubbed her bald head as the nurse pushed her out of the elevator and I backed up. “I thought I’d just get it over with. I look horrible don’t I?”
“No. You look like a fighter.” I smiled, moving to take over for the nurse behind the wheelchair. “Where are we headed?”
“I just wanted to see the city lights. I figure I’ll be too sick to get out of bed for a while so should enjoy it while I’m still feeling strong enough.”
I understood that feeling. We walked in silence until we reached the reached the exit. I took off my coat and placed it on her lap before pushing her out. The city had been astonishingly windy that month.
“Isn’t Chicago just beautiful?” she asked when I moved us over to a bench.
“No place like it,” I replied, sitting down.
Silence.
But then again, after all these years, what else could we be but silent?
“How is your family?” she asked.
I couldn’t stop the smile on my face. “Amazing. I have two kids, a baby boy, and a seven-year-old girl. She’s a chatterbox and always excited. Declan says she’s just like me…even though we adopted her, it really does feel like she is ours. They mean more than the world to me.”
“I can tell you are happy…” She didn’t finish her statement. “While I was in a mental institution, you were living the dream.”
“I would hardly call my life a dream, Imani. Let’s just leave the past in the past.” I didn’t want to talk about this.
“Whatever you say…after all, I’m supposed to be the grateful one. I have no money, my father’s now dead, and my mother is God knows where with all of our money.”
My money. The money they’d lived off of all their lives was the Wilson family money given to me by my father. It was theirs, I had said it a hundred times, and yet they still didn’t get it.
“We should head back inside. It’s cold,” I said, getting up.
“What’s cold is ditching your family for a bunch of white people,” she muttered under her breath; I again ignored her. You would think after all these years, after everything we had gone through, she’d just shut up by now. “You sold out, Cora—”
“No. I chose my happiness over yours. You think you are the first person who tried to make me feel guilty? Why? Because I’m not living to the standard they want? Because you are unhappy? Sorry. I chose me, and it might not be perfect, it might not be a dream or a fairytale, but my good days outweigh the bad. That’s all we can hope for in life, isn’t it?”
She didn’t answer, so I just pushed her back. That was enough Wilson family bonding to last us another decade. I’d make sure she got her treatments and then I was done.
DECLAN
“Where are you?” she said into the phone, and I watched as she spun around searching for me. The tulip I had given her was now braided into her hair.
“I’m kind of hard to miss, love,” I said to her as I honked the horn. Her head whipped back as I stepped out.
“Oh my God.” Her mouth dropped open, her brown eyes taking in every inch of the bright red 1957 Chevrolet Bel Air Convertible in front of her.
“Hi, Mommy!” Helen popped her head out the window like a groundhog, grinning from ear to ear.
“Hi, sweetie, what is going on here?”
“We’re going to movies!” Helen cheered, lifting up the bag of kettle corn in her hands, which she had already started to eat. I was trying my hardest not to think of the crumbs that most definitely were on the floor of an honored American classic.
“You heard the lady.” I smiled, holding the passenger side door open for her. “Come on, we’ll miss the movies!”
“I’m coming. I’m coming!” She giggled, sliding into the red and white seat. “You brought Darcy?”
Sliding over the hood of the car, I could hear them laugh when I got in. “Of course, I brought Darcy, it can’t be a family movie night if the whole family isn’t here.”
“Daddy said we are celebrating!” Helen stuck her head right between us. Her hair, which was split into two big puffs, brushed up against my cheek. “I got to pick the movie too. We are watching Who Framed Roger Rabbit.”
She was so excited she was bouncing.
“Helen, seatbelt.” She pouted and I pouted back, turning around and pressing my face right up against hers until she broke out in a fit of giggles.
“Do classic cars even have seatbelts?” Cora questioned, reaching back to check on Darcy, who sat comfortably in his car seat, happily sucking on his pacifier and gripping on to his own toes.
“They were added. This car is one hundred percent road safe.” I winked, glancing back at Helen. I coughed before pretending to grab a speaker from the radio, holding the imaginary microphone to my lips. “Last call, last call for the Callahan family. Please check to make sure all members of your party are safely buckled in…Helen?”
“Check!” she cried, pulling on the top of the seatbelt.
“Darcy?”
“Check!” Both her and Cora cried out, and Darcy laughed at the faces Helen made beside him.
“Mommy?” I stretched forward and she rolled her eyes at me, though the smile on her face never once wavered as she pulled on the top of her belt.
“Check.”
“Alrighty—”
“Wait you forgot to check you!” Helen leaned forward.
Cora leaned over to me, pulling on the strap across my chest and even unbuckling my seatbelt before clicking it back in place again.
“Daddy, check.” She winked at me.
“This is a reminder to all passengers to keep their hands, feet, and head inside the automobile at all times. Thank you for driving with Declan Callahan tonight, where your comfort and safety are my number one priority. Tonight’s movie, handpicked by none other than beautiful Helen Callahan herself, is Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Our estimated time of arrival is five minutes and twenty seconds —”
Cora couldn’t take it anymore; she laughed so hard she snorted, which only made me laugh back at her.
“Mommy!” Helen sighed.
“Sorry, sorry, I’ll be a good passenger.” She threw her hands up as I started the engine and pulled onto the street.
Helen hummed in the back seat, nodding her head back and forth, staring at the city while I tried not to notice Cora staring only at me, her hand burning a hole through my jeans and driving me completely crazy.
Finally, when we got to the park, I slowed to a stop in front of the large white screen held up by two trees.
“Where’s the movies?” Helen frowned, glancing around.
“The movies are coming to us, sweetheart. It’s called a drive-in movie theater.” Reaching over Cora’s lap, I took out her Twizzlers along with a can of Sprite from the glove compartment.
“Cool!” She reached up, taking them from me.
“What did you say?” Cora asked her as I slid her a mini bottle of wine, her eyes widening as if she were about to break out in tears. Funny enough, when we’d first gotten married, she didn’t drink.
“Thank you!” Helen replied, leaning back into the seat when the lights came on.
Cora said nothing, simply staring at me and drinking her white wine from a bendy straw.
“What?” I finally asked her.
She just shrugged, not answering.
“Cora?”
“I’ve fallen in love with you again twice today, you know that?”
I wanted to kiss her. Damn it.
“You’re finally catching up to me.” I fell in love with her at least twice as often every day.
NEAL
Holding the gun to her chest, she leaned against the wall, taking a deep breath before her eyes focused on me. Stretching my hand out, I told her to wait. Peeking around the mound, everything was silent, but I knew they were out there, just waiting to take the shot…if she got hit, then it was all over.
“NOW!” I yelled, and she bolted as fast as she could toward me.
“FIRE!” Mina hollered from up above as she and Sedric took aim, paintballs flying everywhere, hitting her in the leg, arm, and back.
“I’m hit,” she cried out as I ran toward her. They pummeled me with paintballs over and over again. Lifting my hands in defeat, she and Sedric came out of their hiding spots. Mina blew fake smoke off her gun while Sedric kept his pointed at us.
“Do you give up?” he asked us.
Before I could say anything, Nari shot him right in the chest; she was even quick enough to get Mina. Both the lights in their vests lit up, meaning she’d gotten the kill shots.
“HEY! Cheater!” he called out.
“The war isn’t over until we say we give up! Right, Dad?” Nari raised her hand to fist bump me.
“Absolutely.” I fist bumped her before pulling her into a hug. “It’s not our fault you thought you won and came out early.”
“What? Mommy!” Sedric turned to her as if she was supposed to right this injustice. Both Nari and I stared at her, waiting as she sized us up.
“Well played…we won’t forgive you next time.” She finally spoke and Sedric put his hands to his head, falling to his knees as he groaned.
“Noooooo.” He was the most dramatic six-year-old on the face of the planet.
“Come on!” Mina laughed, putting her hand on his helmet. “Let’s all get cleaned up before we eat, we have ribs!”
“Ribs?” Sedric and I both said at the same time, wide grins on our faces.
Sedric took off his helmet and made a run for the showers. “Ribs! Daddy, come on!”
“You would think we don’t feed him.” I shook my head.
“Daddy, you’re making the same face though.” Nari giggled. Bending down, I made a face at her and she just pinched my cheeks.
“Whose side are you on peanut?”
“If it’s between family and others, I’m on family’s side. If it’s between family and family, I’m on the winning side,” she answ
ered proudly. She and Mina were one in the same; it was funny.
“That girl.” Mina came over to us.
Lifting my pinky up to her I said, “And who’s always on the winning side between family and family?”
“You.” She smiled, linking fingers with me.
“Well then…” Mina said dramatically. “I lose one time and—”
I kissed her and she laughed, but before she could say anything else, Sedric came running back out, butt ass naked with no shame whatsoever.
“DADDY, COME ON!” he yelled at me.
“Sedric, your clothes!” Mina yelled at him.
“You said clean up.” He stretched his stomach.
Snorting, she smacked me on the shoulder. “Stop laughing, this is why he thinks it’s okay!”
“Come on, Sedric, before Mommy shoots you.” I laughed, moving toward him.
He jumped back, holding his arms out like he did for karate class. “I’m too fast.”
“Not too fast for me.” Nari held the gun out and he went running.
“Don’t tell me you are scared of your big sister, Sedric,” I teased him as I entered the locker room, where all his clothes were scattered on the floor.
“I’m not scared…you guys are tricky.” He crossed his arms at me.
“Tricky or smart?” I asked him, taking off my vest and shirt.
“Both,” he grumbled. “But it’s okay, Nari is going to be on my team next time.”
“What? You are ditching Mommy?”
He shrugged. “Boys gotta do what boys gotta do.”
“Sedric.” I didn’t even know what to say; I just put my hand on his head, walking with him to the sauna. I adjusted the temperature before we both walked in. We grabbed towels and hopped onto the seats, laying back. I had bought the paintball center when he started walking as a place for him to train but also have fun. It was open to the public Wednesday through Sunday, so most Mondays and Tuesdays, we were all there.
He was so used to it here, he even knew when to add water to the rocks without me saying anything. He just lay back and relaxed. Was he spoiled? A little bit. But I was glad; life would get harder, at least he was still innocent now.