The house is impeccably decorated and far from childproof. Breakable Christmas decorations fairly call to Haley from every nook and cranny. The conversations are about people I don’t know and inside jokes I don’t get. With no sleep, I feel like I could cry at any minute. To make matters worse, David is magically transported back to his childhood, when his mother and sisters catered to his every whim—forgetting that his wife and kids are even here.
My in-laws’ unsolicited advice is flying atme fromevery direction. Haley is contending with a new sibling and a very nervous mother. David’s family enthusiastically supports spanking. This feels like parenting on a stage in front of opening-night critics.
As David sits at one end of a sumptuous dinner (none of which Haley recognizes or is willing to taste) with his mother and sisters worrying that he’s not sleeping or eating well at home, I am forgotten on the other end, with Molly in my arms and Haley squirming on one knee. Molly starts to cry. I excuse myself to nurse her and, as if on cue, opinions begin ricocheting off the walls.
“That baby can’t be hungry. You just fed her.”
“You’re going to spoil her if you pick her up so much.”
“How do you even know anything is coming out when you nurse her?”
I politely thank them and try again to escape.
That’s when Haley makes a puddle on my sister-in-law’s new carpet. And here we go again.
“She’s too young to be potty-trained. Just stick her back in diapers and let her be a baby a while longer.”
“Are you kidding? Mine were all potty-trained by that age.”
I’m about to cry. I apologize about the carpet, grab Haley and the baby, and excuse myself to a back bedroom.
I indulge myself with a good, long cry. I can still hear the forum outside.
“Why don’t we just buy her some formula? She might want some later.”
“It’s her baby. Let her feed her what she wants to feed her. We could buy some diapers, though.”
That’s when the answer hit me: The Holiday In-Law Survival Hot Line. This is how it works. When you just can’t take it any more—when you’ve smiled, bitten your tongue, and feel as if you might explode—you slip away to a telephone and dial. An automated voice details the options: “If your mother-in-law has just offered to teach you to cook your husband’s favorite meals, press 1. If she claims to have potty-trained all her kids by age one, press 2. If your perfect sister-in-law and her perfect husband have just arrived with their two perfect children, press 3.
If your mother-in-law has come over for a holiday dinner and just pulled out your washer and dryer to clean behind them, push 4.”
The hot-line volunteers will be seasoned veterans of the in-law infantry—women who’ve been through it and lived to tell about it. They’ll listen sympathetically and offer a gentle, “Hon, just kill them with kindness and pray they leave soon.”
“Hey, if the woman wants to clean behind your dryer, point her to your refrigerator, too.”
“Sugar, you don’t really want to strangle your husband, do you?”
Here it is, New Year’s Eve with my own family—normal people at last. Seventy-some loud, hearty Cajuns all talking at once, laughing and, as we say in Louisiana, “Passing a good time.” I see my sweet, little sister-in-law, pregnant and green around the gills. She stands with her toddler on her hip as two of my sisters toss her advice.
“You’d better get that baby out of your bed or you’ll soon have four of you in there. I’ll tell you what you do . . .”
I look at my sister-in-law, at her frozen, polite smile, her desperate scan of the room to locate my brother. Suddenly, it hitsme.We are the in-laws! I a man in-law. I’d never seen things through my sister-in-law’s eyes before—spending the holidays with her husband and his huge, boisterous family.
Aha, a potential hot-line volunteer, I think. I pull my sister-in-law aside to recruit her. “How’d you like to serve on the board of directors for a new 800 hotline I’m organizing?
You’d be perfect. . . .”
Mimi Greenwood Knight
A Lesson in Forgiveness
Apology is a lovely perfume; it can transform the clumsiest moment into a gracious gift.
Margaret Lee Runbeck
It was snowing as I finished unbuckling my baby from her car seat. A toot from behind reminded me that I was holding up traffic on the one-way street.
I didn’t care. My six-month-old had to get an immunization shot, which meant she would be up all night with a fever. My head ached like I was coming down with the flu, and my husband’s job didn’t look steady for the holidays. I wasn’t in a good mood.
The truck tooted its horn again. When I finally had my little one in my arms and covered from the cold air, I looked up and felt my heart sink. I had inadvertently parked in a delivery zone. A look at the name printed on the truck confirmed that I was parked in his place.
Angry at myself for not noticing the sign sooner, I put my baby back into the car and looked down the street. The nearest empty place was more than a block away. Gritting my teeth, I was tempted to go home and reschedule my baby’s vaccination for a day when things were going better, but I didn’t.
After managing to parallel park in a tight spot, I again got ready to get out of my car. Glancing up, I saw someone waiting for me outside. I knew it was the truck driver. Bracing myself for a verbal attack, I slowly emerged from the car.
“Sorry about that back there.” A strong note of apology rang in the man’s voice. I looked at him suspiciously. He was actually grinning at me!
“I saw you had a baby,” he continued, “but there wasn’t any other place big enough for me to park in.”
I managed to stammer my own apology, although I was completely taken aback by his friendly manner. Like Scrooge, I wondered if this was a setup.
“I’d like to give you this.” The stranger held out a coffee mug with his company’s name on the side. He didn’t wait for my reply but shouted, “Merry Christmas!” and sprinted away as fast as he dared on the slick pavement.
I stared after him, the coffee mug still in my hand. As the snow continued to fall steadily around me, a warm feeling spread throughout my body, and I smiled for the first time all day.
At home, that coffee mug serves as a constant reminder to me of the way that driver showed unexpected kindness and forgiveness to me that day. As I drink from it each day, it also reminds me of the way God forgives each of us when we least deserve it.
Using the coffee mug each morning as I begin my day inspires me to work on showing that same kindness and forgiveness to everyone I meet—clerks, cashiers, complete strangers—not just at Christmas, but every day of the year.
Kayleen Reusser
Who Is Jack Canfield?
Jack Canfield is the cocreator and editor of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, which Time magazine has called “the publishing phenomenon of the decade.” The series now has more than 140 titles with over 100 million copies in print in forty-seven languages. Jack is also the coauthor of eight other bestselling books including The Success Principles™ : How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be, Dare to Win, The Aladdin Factor, You’ve Got to Read This Book, and The Power of Focus: How to Hit Your Business, Personal and Financial Targets with Absolute Certainty.
Jack has recently developed a telephone coaching program and an online coaching program based on his most recent book The Success Principles. He also offers a seven-day Breakthrough to Success seminar every summer, which attracts 400 people from about fifteen countries around the world.
Jack is the CEO of Chicken Soup for the Soul Enterprises and the Canfield Training Group in Santa Barbara, California, and founder of the Foundation for Self-Esteem in Culver City, California. He has conducted intensive personal and professional development seminars on the principles of success for more than a million people in twenty-nine countries around the world. Jack is a dynamic keynote speaker and he has spoken to hundreds of thous
ands of others at more than 1000 corporations, universities, professional conferences, and conventions and has been seen by millions more on national television shows such as Oprah, Montel, The Today Show, Larry King Live, Fox and Friends, Inside Edition, Hard Copy, CNN’s Talk Back Live, 20/20, Eye to Eye, and the NBC Nightly News and the CBS Evening News. Jack was also a featured teacher in the hit movie The Secret.
Jack is the recipient of many awards and honors, including three honorary doctorates and a Guinness World Records Certificate for having seven books from the Chicken Soup for the Soul series appearing on the New York Times bestseller list on May 24, 1998.
To write to Jack or for inquiries about Jack as a speaker, his coaching programs, trainings, or seminars, use the following contact information:
Jack Canfield
The Canfield Companies
PO Box 30880 • Santa Barbara, CA 93130
phone: 805-563-2935 • fax: 805-563-2945
E-mail:
[email protected] www.jackcanfield.com
Who Is Mark Victor Hansen?
In the area of human potential, no one is more respected than Mark Victor Hansen. For more than thirty years, Mark has focused solely on helping people from all walks of life reshape their personal vision of what’s possible. His powerful messages of possibility, opportunity, and action have created powerful change in thousands of organizations and millions of individuals worldwide.
He is a sought-after keynote speaker, bestselling author, and marketing maven. Mark’s credentials include a lifetime of entrepreneurial success and an extensive academic background. He is a prolific writer with many bestselling books, such as The One Minute Millionaire, Cracking the Millionaire Code, How to Make the Rest of Your Life the Best of Your Life, The Power of Focus, The Aladdin Factor, and Dare to Win, in addition to the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. Mark has had a profound influence on many people through his library of audios, videos, and articles in the areas of big thinking, sales achievement, wealth building, publishing success, and personal and professional development.
Mark is the founder of the MEGA Seminar Series. MEGA Book Marketing University and Building Your MEGA Speaking Empire are annual conferences where Mark coaches and teaches new and aspiring authors, speakers, and experts on building lucrative publishing and speaking careers. Other MEGA events include MEGA Info-Marketing and My MEGA Life.
He has appeared on Oprah, CNN, and The Today Show. He has been quoted in Time, U.S. News & World Report, USA Today, New York Times, and Entrepreneur. In countless radio interviews, he has assured our planet’s people that “you can easily create the life you deserve.”
As a philanthropist and humanitarian, Mark works tirelessly for organizations such as Habitat for Humanity, American Red Cross, March of Dimes, Childhelp USA, and many others. He is the recipient of numerous awards that honor his entrepreneurial spirit, philanthropic heart, and business acumen. He is a lifetime member of the Horatio Alger Association of Distinguished Americans, an organization that honored Mark with the prestigious Horatio Alger Award for his extraordinary life achievements.
Mark Victor Hansen is an enthusiastic crusader of what’s possible and is driven to make the world a better place.
Mark Victor Hansen & Associates, Inc.
PO Box 7665 • Newport Beach, CA 92658
phone: 949-764-2640 • fax: 949-722-6912
www.markvictorhansen.com
Contributors
Martha Ajango taught first grade for thirty-one years in Fort Atkinson, Wisconsin. She has written “Messages Everywhere,” a collection of short, inspirational vignettes about how she discovers God in commonplace experiences. Please e-mail her at
[email protected].
Jennie Spencer Baty was born and raised in Escalante, Utah, and completed her degree in education and english at the University of Utah in the early 1960s. She has devoted her life to teaching, writing, and being an inspiring mother. She has published a book, Twin Rivers, and has written many poems and other stories.
Lisa Beringer is a piano teacher who writes inspirational stories, humorous plays, and daily e-mails to her four children who have spread their wings and left the nest. She lives with her husband, Dale, in Ontario, Canada, where they enjoy fishing aboard Audacious and acting together in their church family drama troupe.
Lyla Berry, Ed.D,MPM, RN has enjoyed a career that encompasses extensive experience in both nursing and education including articles, textbook, DVD and CD on various aspects of nursing. Retired, she continues to write, loves cooking (section editor, Red Hat Cookbook), gardening, and lectures as a Humorist.
[email protected].
Lynnea Bolin is a ten-year-old student who attends fifth grade at Thomas Jefferson Elementary School. Lynnea enjoys reading, writing, drawing, animals, soccer, and dance. She also enjoys taking care of her two dogs and her guinea pig. Lynnea’s inspiration is her sister Lylian, who writes novels about horses.
Amy Breitmann received her B.S. in Education and M.A. in Counseling from Bowling Green State University in 1994. She is one of the founders of the Lydia Project, Inc., a nonprofit agency supporting women facing cancer. She enjoys writing, teaching, and camping with her family. Contact Amy at development@the lydiaproject.org.
Janet K. Brennan is a poet and author living in the foothills of Albuquerque, New Mexico. She attended the University of New Hampshire, Hesser Business College, and has a legal certificate from the University of New Mexico. Janet has authored poetry and short stories, which have been published around the world, and has recently had two books of her own released. Janet has just completed a novel and is getting ready to release a book of serialized short stories about the west. Visit Janet’s website at www.jbstillwater.com.
Stephanie Ray Brown loves to make holiday memories with family, especially with all the clan that gathers at her Granny’s small house in Providence, Kentucky. Every memory made is precious and treasured, just like “The Matchless Gift” she received as a first-year second-grade teacher. After being blessed to be a stay-at-home mother to Savannah and Cameron for twelve years, Stephanie has recently returned to teaching as a part-time reading instructor at Niagara Elementary in Henderson, Kentucky.
Isabel Bearman Bucher is a freelance writer. She is a mother to Erica and Shauna, splendid young women, wife to Robert, sister, and friend. From this fertile field comes her stories of the heart. She’s author of two books. Nonno’s Monkey will soon be on the web at www.oneitaliana.com.
Joan Clayton is the author of eight books and is a religion columnist for her local newspaper. In 2003, she was named Woman of the Year in her town. Joan has been in Who’s Who Among America’s Teachers three times. She and her husband are retired educators. Her e-mail address is
[email protected].
Beth Copeland is an English and creative writing instructor at East Carolina University. Her poetry book, Traveling Through Glass, received the 1999 Poetry Book Award from Bright Hill Press.
Cookie Curci was born during WWII and most of the articles she writes about are from in and around that time frame. For sixteen years she wrote a popular nostalgia column for her community newspaper, The Willow Glen Resident (The Silicon Valley Metro Newspapers . . . San Jose California). Her generational stories have appeared in several nostalgia books and newspapers across the country.
Michele Ivy Davis is a freelance writer whose stories and articles have appeared in a variety of magazines and anthologies, as well as in newspapers and law-enforcement publications. Her young adult novel, Evangeline Brown and the Cadillac Motel, was published by Penguin and has won national and international awards. Learn more about her at www.MicheleIvyDavis.com.
Judy Lockhart DiGregorio is an Army brat from San Antonio, Texas, who now lives in Oak Ridge, Tennessee. She is a humor columnist for Senior Living and Eva Mag and teaches humor writing workshops for the University of Tennessee and other organizations. A woman of small talents and big feet, Judy has published more than 100 humorous poems and essays.
Elsi Dodge is a single, retired
special-education teacher whose RV trips across the continent span more than a quarter-century. She travels with Lady, her dog, and Dolphin, who thinks he’s a saber-toothed tiger. Elsi’s book, RV Tourist: Tips, Tools, and Stories, is available through her website: www.RVTourist.com.
Lindy B. Dolan lives in Niagara Falls, New York, where she and her husband are raising their three beautiful girls. In her spare time, Lindy makes inspirational name plaques, reads tons of books, and hangs with her friends and family. Please e-mail her at
[email protected].
Lawrence D. Elliott is a nationally published author and has been an active Realtor in southern California since 1989. He lives in Ontario with his wife, Lisa, and his dog, Lacie. He also runs a network of real-estate websites, accessible through his main site at www.LawrenceElliott.com.
Debbie Farmer writes a weekly syndicated column.
John and Carol Forrest are retired from careers in education and health care. (respectively). They live in Orillia, Ontario, Canada, where they enjoy golfing, traveling, cruisin’ in their classic ’68 Mustang “ragtop,” and following the life adventures of their grown children, Rob and Dana. They will celebrate their thirty-eighth anniversary in 2007.
Valerie J. Frost is a freelance writer and an office administrator at Horizon Christian Fellowship in San Diego, California. She and her husband, Terry, are parents of three grown children. They have thirteen energetic grandchildren, and two turbo-charged Jack Russell terriers named Rocket and Daphne.
Mark Geiger received his bachelor of science from the University of California, Riverside, in 1991. He owns his own business, LifeAfterCampus.com, where he sells two dating books he wrote and self-published. He would like to thank his lovely wife, Amy, for her inspiration and support. Contact Mark at
[email protected].