He cleared his throat. “I’m going to return Herbert now, seeing that we have no further use for him…”
I nodded. “Good idea,” I murmured.
He exchanged some more whispery words with Herbert before the ghoul thinned his body even further, until he was practically invisible, and obediently sank into the pencil case. Ibrahim wasn’t joking when he’d said that Herbert was well trained. Quite the English butler, after all…
Shutting the case, Ibrahim stowed it into the pocket of his robe. “I won’t stay long in The Sanctuary,” Ibrahim said, eyeing me. “I’ll be back within a few hours.”
With that, he vanished… leaving me alone with my melancholy.
I’d been thinking about returning to my room after this, but now felt like the right time to tell my wife and sister about what had happened. What I’d done to my nephew. What have I done to him?
I left the Black Heights and wound my way through the forest, back to the Residences. The door to my sister and Xavier’s apartment had been left open, so I let myself inside. I found Sofia and Rose in the kitchen, sitting in silence around the table. Sensing my approach, they both spun around, their eyes wide and bloodshot.
“Dad,” Rose croaked, moving to me. Wrapping her arms around me, she rested her cheek against my chest. I kissed her head before kissing Sofia’s cheek as she moved to embrace me too.
“What’s the matter?” I asked as they drew away.
Sofia swallowed and, taking my hand, led me to the living room sofa. She and Rose exchanged glances before Sofia began, “We found out what happened to Ben.”
“What?” That was not the answer I was expecting.
They proceeded to recount in unsteady voices all that had happened since I had taken my leave, from River’s suspicion to their visit to the oracle and everything she had told them about my son. I was stunned speechless. I had not even known ghosts were real and to learn that my son had become one… it sent my mind and emotions into a tailspin. All thoughts of Jeramiah vanished as waves of grief rolled over me. Ben. He’s dead. And yet he also still lived in some strange half-life. Not fully with us, but not fully absent. I wondered where he was now. For all we knew, he could be here on this island—heck, in this very room. I couldn’t even begin to imagine how much pain he must’ve gone through. And to think that it was him all along who had saved River…
“The oracle refused to give us any definitive answer as to whether he could return,” Sofia said. “Although, in her own twisted way, she seemed to indicate that it might be possible, I don’t know how Ben will have even the first clue as to how to go about it.”
I dropped my head in my hands and closed my eyes tight. I was about to start beating myself up all over again for ever having turned Ben into a vampire—after all, that had been the trigger incident for all of this; if he had never become a vampire, the Elder’s bond might have never come to fruition—but Sofia, already predicting my descent into self-loathing, gripped my arm.
“There is no way we could have known that this would happen, Derek. We thought that we were doing what was best for him at the time. Please.” She squeezed me. “Watching you take all the blame for this only makes me feel worse.”
Still, I couldn’t help but blame myself.
“We just have to hope Ben finds a way,” Rose said, her throat clogged. In spite of her devastation, there was a glint of hope in her eyes. A glint I wished would transfer to me.
A ghost reconnecting with his body? How could such a thing ever happen? It sounded like the stuff of fairytales.
“And Corrine has absolutely no idea?” I asked, my voice several tones deeper than it had been a few minutes ago.
They both shook their heads.
I cursed beneath my breath.
A span of silence fell between us, everything they had told me still sinking in. Then I continued asking question after question, but none of their answers gave me the smallest shred of hope. I wished that I could have my daughter’s optimism, but I didn’t know how.
As I sank back into my own depressing thoughts, Sofia asked me a question. “How have you been faring after the turning?”
I had all but forgotten about Jeramiah. It was hard to believe that I had come here with such a heavy heart over how things had played out with him; now, in the face of my son’s plight, it almost seemed trivial.
“I brought Jeramiah to The Shade,” I said bluntly. Like tearing away a Band-Aid from a scab, I figured it was best to just spit it out.
“What?” three voices spoke at once. Sofia, Rose and also my sister, who had just emerged in the doorway, looking healthier than the last time I’d seen her, but just as saddened as Sofia and Rose.
“I kidnapped him from The Oasis,” I said, heaving a sigh, “and put him in one of the storage chambers in the Black Heights. He’s still there.”
“What for?” Sofia asked, gaping.
I leaned back, rubbing my face in my hands. “I… I just wanted to help him.”
“Help him how?” she pressed.
I explained everything that I’d done to the lad, and by the time I’d finished, all three were stunned.
“Wh-When do you plan to let him go?” Rose asked.
“About now,” I muttered, even as I thought back to his trembling form. I wasn’t sure what I’d done to him, just how badly I might have damaged him. Maybe I had been too heavy-handed.
I was glad that none of the three reprimanded me for what I’d done. I was feeling weighed down enough as it was.
I guessed that all of this had not really been for him at all. It hadn’t even been born out of revenge, but of my own selfishness, wanting to make myself feel better about regrettable events that had transpired in my past.
Sofia swallowed. “Maybe we should all go and see him.”
I didn’t want to think of anything right now other than my son, but I knew it wasn’t right to keep Jeramiah locked up much longer.
Vivienne nodded in agreement. “Xavier has taken Victoria out for some fresh air, so I’m free to come too.”
And so Sofia, Vivienne, Rose and I left the penthouse and made our way back to the Black Heights. I led them deep into its chambers, far deeper than where the dragons resided, and found myself dreading laying eyes on my nephew again as we arrived outside his door.
I unlocked it and swung it open. He lay in the same position as I’d left him, curled up in a ball, head braced close to his chest. The three women glanced at me, as if telling me to stay put, before moving forward. I realized that this was the first time Rose would be meeting Jeramiah, her cousin, face to face. And Vivienne, too.
Even as the women neared, Jeramiah did not look up. Not until Sofia reached down and planted a gentle hand on his shoulder. He jerked as though electrified and raised his head. His eyes fixed on Sofia, then swept across Vivienne and Rose. I quickly backed out of the door so that he would not see me. He had seen enough of my face already—enough to last several lifetimes. I kept myself hidden, peering into the chamber through the gap in the partially open door.
“What do you want with me?” Jeramiah asked, his voice thick and baritone.
“Nothing,” Sofia replied gently. There was silence as he continued to eye the women. Then Sofia continued, “Jeramiah, you need to understand that none of us have ever meant you harm, not even Derek. As hard as it might be for you to accept it, your uncle wants to help you. He… we… all wanted you to be a part of our family from the moment we learned of your existence from Ben. None of us wanted to see you isolated like your father.” Jeramiah flinched at the mention of my brother. “Derek forced you to view his memories because he wanted you to know the truth. The truth can be the most painful thing but it’s the only thing that will help you move on. Get on with your life. Lucas sure as hell wasn’t the victim you’ve imagined him to be, but what does it even matter what your father was?” Sofia paused to glance in my direction, spotting me through the crack in the door. I nodded to her in encouragement. There was no way
to know if her words were getting through to Jeramiah, but at least he was listening, albeit with a vacant face.
Silence descended on the cave again, all four of us waiting expectantly for Jeramiah’s reaction. It came eventually, though his eyes still looked distant. “Then…” he murmured, “if all I saw is true… I don’t know where it leaves me.”
The ghoul seemed to have left him quite bewildered. It was as though he struggled to even form a sentence. But as brief as his statement was, I understood what he meant. Aside from merely surviving, every being, be they vampire, human or something else, needed some deeper purpose to their life. A deeper goal to strive for. Just as for centuries mine had been leading my people to sanctuary, Jeramiah’s had been to fill the void in his life he’d felt ever since he was a boy. And he had latched onto the idea of paying some kind of vengeful homage to his father. It was clear as day why he had clung so hard to the idea that his father had been the victim; the assumption was what his life was based upon. Without that, he had nothing to drive him forward every day. And now he was grasping for something else, something more, a different reason to live.
He seemed close to a nervous breakdown.
Sofia’s expression was traced with concern as she looked down upon the damaged young man. Then Vivienne spoke to her nephew for the first time. She bent down low, as Sofia had done, and dared reach out to touch his hand.
“Do you know who I am?” she asked, drawing his eyes—which he had averted back to the floor—up to meet hers.
Jeramiah nodded slowly. “My aunt,” he managed.
“And do you know who this young lady is?” Viv continued, pointing to Rose, who took the hint and also moved closer.
Jeramiah eyed her. “My cousin,” he muttered.
“And Sofia?”
“Also… my aunt.”
“And I don’t need to ask whether you know who Derek is.”
Even through his daze, Jeramiah managed a scowl. He shook his head stiffly.
“Then don’t you have something to live for?” Vivienne concluded. The way she addressed Jeramiah now reminded me so much of the way she would try to soothe our older brother during one of his bouts of insecurity.
“But I do not know you.” Jeramiah frowned. “Any of you. You are strangers to me.”
“Well,” Rose spoke up, “did you ever meet your father?” My daughter stared hard at her cousin.
“No,” Jeramiah grunted.
“Then you could get to know us. As my mom said, we were ready to welcome you with open arms until you went and set our island on fire. You murdered Kailyn, and you almost murdered me and my husband.” Now Rose was positively glaring at Jeramiah.
He clenched his jaw.
“If you do want to get to know us,” Rose went on, unrelenting in her steely gaze, “an apology would be a good place to start.”
There was a pause as Jeramiah considered her words. It was as though his brain was working at half the speed it should. Then he nodded slowly, and he murmured, “I suppose… I was mistaken. About you… maybe even about Aiden Claremont… Maybe my father deserved to die.”
At this, none of us responded. In my eyes, obviously my brother had deserved to die for attempting to murder the love of my life. But Jeramiah had already received an ample dose of my opinions.
Attempting to disrupt the awkwardness, I re-entered the room and walked over to my nephew. Stooping down, I withdrew the key to his charmed manacles from my robe and removed his chains. My nephew stood up, and then, not quite level with me, looked me in the eye. His face had a sickly grey tinge to it, and his eyes were hollow. Empty.
I was unsure of what to suggest now and, it seemed, so were my three female companions.
Then Jeramiah cleared his throat, his gaze passing over the others. “You may call yourself my family but… I don’t believe that I belong here. I wish to leave.”
Still, none of us spoke. He certainly wouldn’t be welcomed on the island by our residents and none of us were about to lie that he would. I wouldn’t be surprised if Aiden and Kira lunged for him the moment they laid eyes on him. In many ways, it was best if he decided he wanted nothing to do with us and left. But I found myself worrying about him. Where would he go from here? How would he piece his life back together?
“We can transport you to wherever you would like to go next,” I said. I guessed I could pay him at least that much of a courtesy after what I had just put him through. After what I had taken from him.
“No,” he murmured, shaking his head. “I’ll… I’ll find my own way.”
“What do you mean, you’ll find a way?” Vivienne asked. “You do know that you’re in The Shade right now?” She shot me a quizzical, almost accusatory, glare.
And I realized that I had not told Jeramiah exactly where he was. I’d just assumed that he would’ve guessed.
Jeramiah nodded. “I know,” he replied hoarsely. “If you would just give me a boat with some kind of covering, some sacks of blood for the journey… I’ll be on my way.”
I exchanged glances with Sofia, who simply shrugged. We both had too much on our minds regarding our own son to be able to put much more energy into someone else’s.
“Okay,” I said heavily. “Come with us. We’ll take you to the Port.”
None of us exchanged another word as we exited the chamber and led Jeramiah along the winding tunnels, through the depths of the Black Heights until we arrived in the clearing before the forest. Rose suggested that she race to fetch some blood and catch up with us at the Port. I let her go, and as the remaining four of us headed for the forest path, I silently prayed that we would not bump into anyone on the way who would recognize my nephew.
I moved forward brusquely, setting the pace for the rest of them, although Jeramiah was slower than I would’ve liked. By the time we reached the Port, Rose had already caught up with us, carrying a bulging backpack. She handed it to Jeramiah, who took it with a murmur of thanks. I walked onto the jetty and looked around for a suitable boat. We had many new additions to our fleet, thanks to Caleb. We waited for Jeramiah to make his choice, which ended up being one of the smaller boats with a wide covering.
Jeramiah stepped onto the boat, planting the backpack down in one corner. Rose, Viv, Sofia and I stood in a quiet line, watching as he began fumbling around at the front of the boat. He looked so disorientated, I wondered if he even knew how to navigate it out, but he seemed to find his way around soon enough. Just as he was about to cut the ropes that bound the small boat to the jetty, a voice yelled from behind us.
“Derek!” Corrine’s voice.
I whirled around to see the witch rushing toward me across the clearing, and then behind her six figures… three of whom made me believe that Herbert had messed with my brain after all.
Ben
After imparting upon us our strange yet wondrous bodies, the fae did not hang around. Sherus had assured me that he could track us down, and he had made his demands clear, so there was no need for them to stay longer.
Despite our terrifying lack of time, the six of us—Nolan, Chantel, Marcilla, Kailyn, Lucas and I—couldn’t help but just stand there for several more minutes, staring at each other and marveling at our new forms. It took Lucas the longest to accept what had happened. He kept running his hands through his hair, clasping his palms together, dipping down and plunging his fingers into the snow, as if he just could not quite bring himself to believe it was real, and he was expecting to wake up at any moment back in his dark pool in the deepest levels of The Underworld.
Then we could wait no longer. I was the one who drew us all out of our stupor as I said, “The first thing we should do is return to The Shade.” My skin was positively tingling at the thought of meeting my family and River. I could already picture the smiles on their faces, the tears in their eyes.
“The Shade?” Lucas stammered.
I turned my focus back on him. “Uh, yes. All my—our—allies are there. If we’re to have any chance of pulling this of
f, we need as much help as we can get.”
Although I didn’t want to rope my family into yet another one of my dangerous escapades, this was something that even I was not stubborn enough to attempt to do alone. I’d known that from the moment I had proposed the suggestion to Sherus.
“I cannot return there,” Lucas said, shaking his head. “I want to look for my son.”
I heaved a sigh. “I know, but how will you ever find him? I doubt you remember how to get to The Oasis—assuming that’s where he is. In fact, I’m not even sure how to get there myself. But Corrine knows.”
At the mention of Corrine—someone who I guessed had never hidden her opinion on his character from him—Lucas looked even more reluctant.
“Just come with me, Lucas. Come with us…” My voice trailed off as I remembered Nolan, Chantel and Marcilla. “Will you come to The Shade?” I asked them.
They nodded eagerly.
“Yes. We’ll do anything to help you,” Nolan said. He had tears of joy in his eyes. “We’ll do anything to help you secure these bodies for us.”
I turned back to my uncle. “Our first priority is to secure these bodies. Then we can look for your son.”
He grimaced. “I’ll just… wait by the boundaries then,” he muttered.
I wasn’t going to argue with him further. There was no time. If he didn’t want to come into the island that was his choice, but he was clearly a changed person and I was sure that everyone would give him a second chance. They had given Kiev a second chance, after all.
Still, I couldn’t mull over this now. I gazed out toward the ocean, sparkling in the sunlight. Now I was faced with the daunting proposition of finding my way back to The Shade. Again. But at least by now, I had done it a number of times, and it should be faster and easier. Now of all times, we really could not afford to get lost.
We set off—Lucas in his new fae body was thankfully just as fast as the rest of us. It was a real blessing that fae were able to travel with such speed. I found myself zooming as fast as I had while still a ghost. Fae could assume physical bodies—like jinn and ghouls—but they also had subtle forms they could switch into, which I guessed gave them the best of both worlds. Although, even as we flew, I remained in my solid state the entire time and it didn’t appear to hamper my speed. I’d had enough of being a spirit. Enough for a million lifetimes.