What a comfort it had been, she realized suddenly. Reaching and finding that big, warm hand had been exactly what she needed to get her through that moment at her mother’s grave. She would have to thank him when she saw him again. If she saw him again, she amended, even as she hoped she would.
So wrapped up in her thoughts, Mandy had not realized that Becca had finally fallen asleep.
“I really should get up and do something to help Amy.” But Mandy’s eyes were drifting shut; her body had other ideas.
Her last thought before she drifted off to sleep was getting her mother’s papers and leaving a note for her pa. She’d have to discuss it with Amy…
Aaron Marks stood at his office window overlooking Baxter’s main street and reread the letter in his hand. He withdrew a match from his pocket to light his cigar. The smoke curled around his head as he once again read the last line. “I’ll be home this summer and it’ll be different this time, I promise.”
He raised both cigar and letter but changed his mind and pulled back short of lighting the paper. Walking to the cabinet where he kept his files, he reached in until he felt the false back. It moved easily under his touch, and the paper disappeared inside.
He scowled at the wall, where music suddenly sprang to life from the bar next door, and clamped the cigar tight in his teeth. The last thing he needed was music when he had to decide what move to make next. The din grew steadily louder, a little too raucous for so early in the day.
He reached for his jacket and started toward the door. There just might be something interesting going on right now. One never knew what one could learn from the patrons of the bar.
14
A strand of hair kept slipping down into Amy’s face, and she blew it out of the way for what felt like the hundredth time.
“You sound like a billows,” Silas teased her as he came in from the yard. His shadows, Levi and Clovis, right behind him.
Her laugh was a little breathless as she leaned into the laundry tub.
“My turn, Amy,” exclaimed Mandy as she came in from the dining area with a basket of clothes in her arms.
“Mandy, you’re just in time. My arms are getting tired.”
“I was talking with Carrie. She feels guilty that she’s not out here working. So I used one of your lines, Amy, ‘there will be plenty of laundry in the days to come.’ ”
“Good thinking. I’ll take this basket out to the line and then be right back with you.”
Silas scooped up the basket before Amy could touch it and stood waiting, as ever her faithful servant. Amy gave him her prettiest smile and sailed out the door, very much a woman in love. Mandy watched them with an unreadable expression before plunging her hands into the soapy tub.
Amy’s hands flew as she filled out the clothesline and Silas stood holding the basket as she moved along briskly with clothes pins in her mouth. At one point, when her mouth was empty, he bent so he could kiss her, as she retrieved a pillow slip from the basket. She wholeheartedly returned the kiss, unaware of Levi and Clovis in close attention.
“I love you, Si Cameron,” Amy spoke quietly.
“The feeling is quite mutual, I assure you.”
Amy became aware of the boys just then, and Silas felt her stiffen. His voice came for her ears alone. “They’re going to see us as a man and woman in love, sweetheart. Don’t pull away from me.”
“I just didn’t realize they’d followed you, I’m not really embarrassed, just surprised.”
“No more time alone.” He raised his voice to a normal level then. “We’ll get out of your hair and leave you to your work. I’m going over to Luke’s and then into town. While Carrie is seeing Mark, the boys and I will have time to go to the store if you want to make a list. Tell Carrie I’ll be about a half hour, and to please be ready.”
“Well, Carrie, how does it feel?”
“It’s still sore but not as bad.”
“You had a good night’s sleep?”
Carrie nodded and looked so surprised that Mark smiled. Oh, to be young again and without worry. He’d bet Silas had been up to check on her more than once.
“Let’s have a look.”
Clovis, who had decided to stay with his sister, leaned close as he watched the doctor look into her mouth.
“Does it hurt, Carrie?”
She couldn’t answer, but Mark noticed Clovis move closer and touch his sister’s arm. Again Mark’s examination was gentle and thorough.
“Your jaw was a little swollen yesterday, but there’s no swelling today. And the throat isn’t quite so inflamed. I think we’ll keep up with the gargling and unless you get a fever or start to feel much worse, I’ll see you in a week.”
“Thank you. Come on Clovis. We’ll wait for Silas out front.”
“Oh, there’s no need for that. Come on through to the house. Sue and the girls will want to see you.” Carrie, still a little fearful of this man, followed slowly. Clovis, knowing that the doctor had kids to play with, skipped along without hesitation.
Baxter’s newest businessman, Ross Beckett, stayed seated behind his desk even though his customer was exiting. Aaron Marks. What was it about the man that rubbed him the wrong way? Ross considered himself a public servant and as yet, had never turned anyone away, but even though Marks’ request had been innocent enough, Ross felt hesitant, as though helping him was going to harm someone else.
He made some notes about the land on which Aaron Marks wanted confirmation and then turned back to his letter to Sarah. He reread what he had written, wanting it to be just right. He planned to post it that day.
Dear Sarah,
I hated leaving when things between us were so unsettled, but I had to get back. My trip was a good one, but you were not far from my thoughts and I felt pained at every mile that separated us.
I know now that compromise is what is needed here, on both our parts. But there is one thing about which I cannot compromise, and that is living in Baxter. Sarah, this is where God wants me.
Baxter is not a “hick” town. Even though you refused me adamantly while I was there, will you please reconsider coming here for a visit? I’ll be moving to my new place in a few weeks and Grandma Em would be thrilled to have you stay with her.
I know you would love the people here, and they would love you. The church is wonderful. It has a spirit of loving welcome for everyone who walks through the door.
I realize Baxter is far from home, but we could visit as often as we’re able. After all, my family is in Hayward too.
I want very much to be sensitive to your needs, but I still wish you would come my way a little. I’m trying to do what’s right for both of us and for our life together, if it is in fact, God’s will.
Know that I’ll be praying for you as you read this and reply. Give my love to your family. I miss you.
Love, Ross
Ross set the paper aside and leaned his elbows on the desk. His gaze fell on his door where the glass read:
Ross Beckett
Attorney at Law
How knowledgeable I am, he thought, when it comes to the law. Pages memorized out of books, hours spent with a seasoned lawyer who practiced up north—gleaning from him, learning, soaking it all in, to be the best at my job. But this—
Ross’ mind stopped there. Matters of the head were so much easier than matters of the heart. It wasn’t as though his heart was never involved. There were heartbreaking cases, like a woman from the Hayward area, widowed a few days, coming to him and wanting to sell her land and farm. She still bore the bruises of the last beating her husband had given her before he fell down the stairs in a drunken stupor. She couldn’t wait to sell and get out of the area; the sooner the better. Ross had asked her if maybe she’d want to wait and give herself some time. But she informed him in a firm voice that she’d had plenty of time, 30 years of time, to be exact.
Oh yes, his heart was sometimes involved, more than it should be. But nothing he ever encountered compared to this unce
rtainty, this waiting to see if he and Sarah could work things out. It occupied his heart as well as his head nearly every waking moment.
How many years had he known Sarah? He guessed it must be over 20; most of their lives. She had always been special. When he’d made a decision for Christ a few years ago, he wasn’t long in understanding that any girl he might feel serious about would need to have the same heart for God as he did. There was enough of a change in him that the next time he saw Sarah, she’d eyed him speculatively and asked him what was going on. He didn’t immediately answer, for fear of wording things wrong and turning her away forever.
But he need not have worried because the Lord was working in Sarah’s heart and she came right to his house to pin him down a few days later.
Ross was surprised speechless when, upon explaining to Sarah about his new life in Christ, her eyes filled with tears and she asked him to pray with her. There was no hesitation then, and Ross walked on a cloud for days.
Neither one saw this as a sign for a future together, but being in each other’s company was easier all the time with the newfound faith they both shared. They often came together in excitement to tell some new biblical truth they’d discovered.
In time Ross did take these things to be a sign that this was the wife God had for him. And it seemed Sarah felt the same way, that is until Ross told her of his leading to head out from beneath the protective wings of the man he’d been working for and open up his own practice in Baxter.
“Ross, you can’t be serious.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, why would you want to live all the way down there, where you don’t know anyone? You’ve got a great job with Bill Colter here, and you said he could use you forever.”
“I could stay with Bill, Sarah. I know that and I’ll never forget what he’s taught me, but I want my own practice, small as it might be. And you’re wrong about me not knowing anyone in Baxter. Baxter is Paul Cameron’s hometown, and I’ve been to visit with him and Abby. His family is great, the next best thing to being with my own, and in some ways, better.”
But she was not convinced and suddenly the future didn’t look quite so rosy. The conversation ended when she told him she had never planned to live anywhere other than Hayward.
Shortly after that Ross’ plans to move fell quickly into place. Doors opened in ways he never imagined, confirming over and over again that this was God’s will and not his own. And still he prayed, begging God to intervene if this was a mistake. With his parent’s support he moved to Baxter, taking residence with Grandma Em for an indefinite period.
Now that the question of his moving was out of the way, why hadn’t God burdened Sarah’s heart with the same destination if they were meant to be together?
Ross knew the answers to his questions were not going to magically appear before his eyes. He had a letter to mail and then work to do. The rest was in God’s hands and maybe Sarah’s.
15
“Mandy, do you have a minute?”
“Sure.”
Amy led the way into her bedroom to the small desk. “Will you please tell me everyone’s birthday?”
A few days ago Mandy would have been surprised at such a request, but it didn’t take long to learn that Amy was a woman with a generous heart. It made her desire to know everyone’s birthday almost routine.
“Start with yourself.”
“Okay, I was just 18 on May 9. Carrie will be 15 July 2. Levi is 11 this year on October 27.” She paused to let Amy catch up. “Clovis will be 10 in September on the fifteenth. Becca, can you tell Amy your birthday?”
“It’s nine something.”
“September,” her sister supplied.
“Yeah, nine September.” Becca spoke from where she’d thrown herself on the bed. Mandy thought as she watched her that Becca acted as if she’d been here forever. She said as much and Amy smiled.
“I hope you all feel that way.” There was such sincerity in the words that Mandy knew that now was the time to ask her question.
“Amy, if I was very careful with your books upstairs, I mean, I wouldn’t take them out of the room or touch them with dirty hands or anything—well, could I please read some of them?”
Amy looked at Mandy in surprise. Every feeling, every heartwrenching emotion that Mandy had ever felt about books was clearly written on her face. Amy had to fight to keep her voice normal, but she didn’t speak soon enough.
“I shouldn’t have asked you, Amy. You’ve already done so much, you must think me the biggest ingrate you’ve ever known.”
“That couldn’t be farther from the truth! I think you’re one of the sweetest girls I’ve ever met. I wish you had said something earlier about the books. You could have had one read by now.” Mandy watched Amy rise from the desk and move to the door of the wardrobe. When she turned back to Mandy, she held a slim volume bound in black leather.
“Why don’t you start with this one? It’s a book of poetry that belonged to my mother. It’s one of my favorites and I think you’ll like it.”
“Maybe I better not if it belonged to your mother. Carrie told me about her.”
“Take it, Mandy. My mother loved to read, and if she were standing here she’d give it to you herself.”
“Thank you,” Mandy spoke humbly. “There was one other thing I wanted to ask you.”
“Please don’t jump on the bed, Becca. Sure, Mandy, what is it?”
“I would like to walk back to my house and get some papers I left behind and leave a note for my pa in case he shows up.”
“Oh, what a good idea! I forgot that he’ll wonder where you are. I’ll tell you what, stay here at my desk and write your note and then when Silas comes back you can take the wagon.”
“He’s back,” Becca chirped as she bounced high in the air.
“Becca, I asked you not to jump on the bed. Now, what did you say?” Amy spoke to the little girl she’d scooped off the bed and now held in her arms.
“Silas is back.”
“He is?” She moved to look out the window and sure enough, Silas was coming into the yard.
“Well, don’t you have good eyesight! Let’s go help unload and give Mandy some quiet to write her note.”
Mandy wasn’t long at the small desk, and she deliberately said nothing about her mother.
Pa,
We’re staying with Silas and Amy Cameron on the other side of town.
Mandy
Mandy read the note over several times before she folded it and put it into her pocket. Then she joined everyone in the yard.
“Silas, what is all of this?” Mandy heard Amy ask as she approached the wagon. “My list wasn’t very long.”
“Well, I did some shopping of my own.” He had an innocent sparkle in his eye, and Amy wondered how long it would be before she found out what he’d been up to.
“Carrie, what did Mark have to say?”
“He said my throat is better and to keep gargling.”
“He doesn’t want to see her until next week.” Silas supplied the rest of the story as he loaded packages into everyone’s arms and told them to take them into the living room.
Amy had just taken some things into the kitchen when he heard Becca squeal with delight in the living room. She went in to find Silas opening package after package of fabric, all lightweight and summery in beautiful blues, greens, yellows, and reds. There were plaids for the boys’ shirts and solid colors for special wear, calicos, and even some corduroy. Amy stood in the door and felt tears sting her eyes. Just that morning as she prayed she had asked the Lord to help her broach the subject of clothing to Mandy without offending her.
“Now,” Silas was saying, “I didn’t know your mother and I wouldn’t want to do anything you might consider disrespectful of her memory, but you’ll notice I didn’t buy any black material. What I’m trying to say is I don’t want you to wear black for a year as is sometimes customary. I somehow doubt your mother would have wanted it that way
. There is a solid forest green and a navy blue if you feel you really need to be in mourning, but I for one will understand and agree with you if you don’t.” He had said most of this with his eyes on Mandy and Carrie, for he knew they were the ones who would make this decision. Mandy looked uncertain and Silas steeled himself for whatever she was about to say.
“Everything is wonderful and you’re right about Mama, she wouldn’t want us to mourn, but Silas, we can’t pay for this. Even if I went into town today and found a job, why, it would be months, maybe a year, before I could pay for all of this fabric. I don’t mean to put down your hospitality, but we’re eating you out of house and home and I think that’s enough.”
“Mandy,” Silas interrupted, for he knew she would go on. “Please listen to what I’m about to say to you. And not just you, Mandy, but all of you. For whatever reason, one that I try not to question, God has not given children to Amy and me. But if He did, I can tell you they would not be paying for their own food and clothing while under my roof. They would have their chores, as I did when I was a kid, and they would help out, the way you all do. However, they would not be working in town or expected to help put food on the table and clothes on our backs.
“If we were struggling financially it might be different, but again for an unknown reason, God has given us more than enough, and we want to share what we have with you.
“The only payment I want is to see the boys in new pants and shirts and you girls in as many dresses and bonnets as this fabric will make. I didn’t buy anything for undergarments; I’ll leave that up to Amy the next time she’s in town.” He said all of this comfortingly in his deep, gentle voice. The five children took it all in, on their own individual levels of understanding, and thought he was the most wonderful man on earth.
The first to move or make a sound was Carrie, who came unselfconsciously and put her arms around Silas and hugged him. He hugged her back, holding her tight for a moment and kissing her forehead as he released her. Becca needed no prompting after that, for she was clearly the “cuddler” of the group, and Silas gave her a great squeeze before releasing her with a kiss also.