“It was too cold to leave him there,” she said. “He was in too much pain to warm himself.”
“I understand. Well, there is nothing that can be done except to remove the bullet and let him heal in his own time.” The doctor removed a sharpened blade from his satchel. “You may not want to watch.”
She didn’t want to watch. She didn’t want to see him suffer any more pain.
“I have seen much worse,” she told him. She wasn’t going to leave Sin’s side for a second. She had been a political ruler for too long not to be savvy to the implications and dangers that came with Sin being incapacitated. He would need a protector and a voice and she would be that voice until he told her to do otherwise.
The physician removed the bullet with a growl of agony coming from his patient as he was cut open without so much as a sip of liquor to dull the pain. She wondered if they had laudanum in Kith. She figured not, otherwise the physician would have used it, wouldn’t he? The use of the opiate as an anesthetic was a relatively new practice amongst Sarens, so perhaps it had not traveled to the Kiltian medical community.
The doctor stitched closed the wound left by his knife and Ariana could see the livid bruising that was beginning to spread up and down Sin’s breastbone. Every move he made, every breath he took to expand his ribcage must be excruciating. Her chest ached in sympathy.
Once the doctor was done she demanded that the room be cleared of all but herself, Mariah and one of the temple servants. This servant she used to fetch her things like water and clean bandages. It wasn’t long before Raj Vich swept into the room.
“What is this I hear of my brother being ill?” he demanded. His carriage was held with self-importance and she could see the avarice in his eyes. If something happened to Sin, this man would be prince of all his peoples. It must be a heady feeling indeed to face being so close to such a possibility.
“Injured,” Ariana corrected. “He has been shot.”
“Shot! What is being done for him? Can he assume his mantle of power?”
She supposed she should be grateful Vich asked after his well-being first before his follow-up question.
“He will be bedridden for quite some time. You will need to rule in his stead for the duration of his convalescence.”
“This I will do for my brother,” he said grandly. But it was clear to Ariana who would be served most by this assumption of power.
“I will stay by his bedside and care for him myself,” Ariana said. “If this is all right with you.”
Vich nodded and waved the matter off. “You may do so. Only ask for anything and it will be given to you.”
“Make certain that is clearly known,” she said, thinking of Mordol’s insolence.
“It shall be known. All will be done to aid my brother or there will be an answer to me.”
Vich then swept out of the room and grandly as he had entered it, not bothering to try and speak to his brother or to spend time at his side.
When Fatima arrived it was a different matter entirely. Fatima was shaken to see her son brought so low. Her hands shook as she sat beside his bed and took his hand in hers. Ariana perched on the arm of the chair Fatima had pulled up to the bed and rubbed a soothing hand over the raji-mother’s back.
“Thank you for bringing my son back to me,” Fatima said once she had had Ariana relate the story of what had happened. “My people need him. Raj Vich would not be good for this realm. He is far too selfish. But I think you know this already.”
“I wouldn’t presume…” Ariana said hesitantly.
“No. It is all right. I know my sons well. I know their weaknesses and their strengths. Vich chafes under his brother’s shadow. He cannot be content with his lot in life. He covets that which could be his if only his brother were not alive.”
“You…don’t think he would make an attempt on Sin’s life do you?” Ariana was aghast. But even as she said it she knew it was not outside of the realm of the possible.
“Without a wife and an heir, my son is in a precarious position. He is aware of this, but he doesn’t think his brother would go so far. As Vich’s mother, I would like to think my second son is not so mercenary that he would harm his elder brother for the sake of assuming his mantle. However, I know Vich well. He lives to undermine his brother. To make himself appear the better ruler. Sometimes he succeeds, sometimes he does not. I think Sin tolerates him for my sake…and for the fact that there are no other heirs to this throne other than Vich and his sons.”
“There are no cousins? I would have thought with the rulers being allowed so many wives there would be no shortage of relatives.”
“Disease was a terrible curse of our people before the end of the war. We were all packed in so tightly together that if one fell ill almost all others fell ill. It wiped out nearly all of the family one wet spring when plague came and ravaged us. The only cousins left are women. No. Sin and Vich and their sons are all that is left of the royal line. Why do you think I have pressed my son all these years to find a wife?”
“I don’t understand why he has not done so before now,” Ariana said, her brow furrowed with concern for Sin’s bloodlines.
“My son is, I think, a romantic at heart. He wanted what his father and I had. One good, true love. I think he has found it at last.”
Ariana flushed and looked away. “Do not get your hopes up, Fatima. I will not be staying.”
“Do you not love my son?” Fatima asked, surprised.
“I…I do not. We are lovers, but no more. I do not have the depth of feeling you or your son are seeking.”
Fatima regarded her silently a moment. “I see,” she said softly.
“Mother.”
Fatima gasped and looked at her son. They had been speaking and had not realized he had been listening. Ariana had thought him caught in a stupor of pain. For some reason she felt guilty. She didn’t know why.
“My son. You were fortunate today,” Fatima said, bringing her sons fingers to her lips and kissing them repeatedly.
“I was fortunate to be with a woman who can not only care for herself, but has the strength to see others through as well.” Sin stared at Ariana steadily. “I have chosen well.”
Sin groaned and tried to shift in his bed.
“You must remain still,” Ariana said hurriedly, choosing to ignore his personalized comments.
“I do not do well with stillness,” he said grimly.
Ariana could see how that would be. He remained active, be it mind or body, constantly. He was going to make a terrible patient.
“I will remain still only if you get into my bed with me,” he said, gazing hard at Ariana.
“Nonsense. You do not need me sitting beside you making you even more uncomfortable than you already are,” she said.
Sin let go of his mother’s hand, grabbed the covers and threw them off of his body. Ariana gasped as he exposed himself to his mother and moved as though to rise from the bed.
“Stop! Please get back into bed!” Ariana begged him.
“My son, Ariana is right, you cannot move about in this condition.”
“The doctor said you weren't to move at all!”
“Get into this bed with me and I will be still.” He held her gaze, challenge in his eyes. She knew without a doubt that he would get up if she did not agree, no matter what it cost him in pain.
“Very well,” she said on a harsh sigh. “If you must be held like a child then I will hold you.”
He chuckled and let his mother tuck the covers back across his body. Ariana circled around to the opposite side of the bed and gingerly climbed in beside him, trying her best not to disturb him too much. He blew her efforts to hell when he lifted his arm and draped it about her shoulders, drawing her into his side with a grunt of pain. She took hold of his arm and undraped it from her shoulders, settling it down between their bodies.
“I’ll stay only if you rest and take care of yourself.”
“I promise you that I will. But I
will need you to entertain me.”
He grimaced and groaned and she bit her lip.
“Don’t you use laudanum here? It would reduce the pain.”
“And it would reduce my capacity to think clearly,” he said with a frown. “The ability to be here for my people. As it is I will be stuck here for a few days.”
“Weeks,” Ariana corrected.
“Days,” he shot back. “There is no way I am staying here for more than a week.”
“Do not worry, Ariana. His body will reduce his bravado over time.”
As if on cue, Sin groaned soulfully and placed his hand against the wound on his chest.
“Damn. I have never felt pain like it. Every breath burns. Movement is excruciating. It is almost more than a man can bear.”
“Then that is why I should not be here,” Ariana argued, making to move from the bed. He quickly grabbed her hand, though the fast movement cost him in pain.
“I said almost. I will get out of this bed if you do.”
“I cannot stay here constantly.”
“Perhaps not constantly, but close enough. You will sleep beside me. Eat with me. Perhaps read to me. Keep me generally entertained so I do not scream from boredom. Would you do that for me?”
He sounded so hopeful she could not deny him.
“It is not as though I have anywhere else to be,” she reminded him softly.
She didn’t know if his grimace was from pain or contrition.
“I will need someone to keep me apprised of all things. You are…free to move about as you need to.”
“Without a guard?” she asked.
He lowered his gaze.
“I’m sorry.”
“Very well,” she said. “But if I am free to come and go, I want that to be made general knowledge. I don’t want to be waylaid or confronted over everything I do.”
“It will be done. When you are not here you are to have the run of the temple. But I do not want you leaving these walls without me. I know…you have proven yourself able to handle yourself in a dangerous situation,” he allowed, “but it would make me feel better.”
“Don’t worry. I have no desire to leave. Although…I may want to walk with Mariah around the grounds. You have the beginnings of a lovely garden with all its walkways. The plantings are not finished and the trees and shrubbery are young yet, but it will be a garden to be proud of once it has grown up.”
“I see no harm in that. You must have a little fresh air. Very well, with Mariah or my mother…but always with a guard.”
She didn’t know why it should hurt her that he didn’t trust her, but in a way it did. Of course, given the opportunity she would escape the temple and head back home…wouldn’t she?
She bit her lip as the thought wrestled in her mind. Of course she would go. She didn’t belong here. But…could she make herself leave him? They were lovers now and although she told herself it was only a physical connection…she feared that wasn’t entirely true. She was quickly growing attached to him…to this place. To this country with its wounded and robust people. She was growing fond of Fatima. She was such a strong woman. She had ruled a people and raised a fine son until he was old enough to rule on his own. She had set an example for him in more ways than one. She had shown him how to be a benevolent and thoughtful ruler, and she had shown him what it meant to be part of a loving couple. So much so that he wanted it for himself.
Not that she thought she belonged as part of that kind of relationship. She had made it clear to him that she was nothing of the kind. Hadn’t she?
She couldn’t have it both ways, she scolded herself. She couldn’t demand he trust her and yet know she would betray him given half a chance.
“Thank you,” she said quietly.
“Are you hungry? Can I get you something to eat?” Fatima asked him.
There’s too much pain for anything to be palatable,” Sin said grimly. “I’m afraid I would be sick.”
“It’s all right,” Aria assured his mother at her wrinkled brow of concern, “We had a very large breakfast. That was only a few hours ago.”
“Very well,” Fatima relented. “But you will see that he eats regularly?”
“I will insist upon it.”
Fatima looked at her, caught her gaze with a grateful expression. Ariana smiled at the other woman. She would have taken care of her son regardless of her request. But she knew there was no way for Fatima to know that. As far as Fatima was concerned, Ariana wanted out of Kilt as swiftly as possible. Even if it meant leaving her son with no one to care for him. Once again she found herself torn. If the opportunity presented itself, would she leave him here, in his sickbed, with no one but his mother to be trusted to care for him? To protect him from his brother’s greed?
Ariana was discomfited by the fact that she didn’t give a resounding yes to herself. It shouldn’t matter to her what she would be leaving behind her. All that should matter to her was what was in front of herself. What her responsibilities were in Saren.
It didn’t matter, she told herself with a sigh. No such opportunity promised to present itself any time soon. Even if it did the weather was completely atrocious. There was no escaping until spring and warmer weather presented itself.
Sin groaned and all thoughts of escape fled from her mind. She reached out and gripped his hand, squeezing it in comfort. He turned his head and beckoned her for a kiss.
She gave it gladly.
Chapter Twenty-One
The next two weeks dragged by with interminable slowness for Sin. He hated being stuck in bed. It felt lazy and self-indulgent, two things he was not known for being comfortable doing. The only things that made it bearable was Ariana’s presence, and the ledgers she brought him to help occupy his mind and help him feel as though he were doing something to run his country.
He felt bad for keeping her in by his side the whole time. She did leave from time to time, but for the most part she stayed with him, keeping him company. She either climbed into bed with him or sat in a chair by the bed. They took every meal together.
The pain of the injury subsided over time, but he was black and blue and sore for the better part of those two weeks. He was just beginning to get out of bed—despite protests from both Ariana and his mother—and sitting up in a chair for an hour here or there.
For Arianna’s part, she was surprised to realize she was enjoying her time with Sin. She got to know him better with every passing day. The intimacy that grew between them would have been disconcerting to the Ariana who had first come to live in the Kiltian court. But this had grown on her so naturally that she felt no upset or discomfiture. She enjoyed her discoveries about him as he relaxed his guard and truly opened up to her. He did not bring up their relationship, avoiding the topic studiously, knowing it would only make them quarrel or retreat to lick their wounds in opposite corners. They simply treated one another like lovers and spoke nothing about their feelings.
She found out he had a sense of humor. He found out that she was doggedly loyal to a friend. She found out that he could be trusted with deep secrets, he found out that she was able to tell a good joke. They were both well-read, further dispelling her image of him being an uncouth and uneducated barbarian. In fact, she hadn’t thought that about him in a very long time it seemed.
Ariana was sitting beside him in bed one morning, going over some governing papers with him when she suddenly became aware of the fact that he was staring at her. He did this often, so she ought to have been used to it, but she blushed under his regard all the same and poked his arm.
“You’re doing it again,” she said accusingly.
He knew exactly what he was doing and he smiled at her.
“I cannot help it. Become less beautiful and less fascinating and I promise you I will stop staring at you. Since you become more of each with every passing day, I fear it would be a lost cause for you to try. Your only recourse it would seem would be to learn to live with my gawking at you at odd periods of th
e day.”
“I could put blinders on you. Perhaps a mask where no light can penetrate? You could stare into blackness then.”
“Ah, but that would only force me to use my other senses to see you. For instance, my hands…”
Sin reached out and stroked warm fingers down the slope of her breast, his nails scraping across the silk covering her nipple briefly before falling away. Ariana flushed immediately hot all over her exposed skin and she was forced to clear the catch from her throat before speaking.
“Don’t tempt me,” she said with a smile.
“Tempting you is exactly what I wish to do. Ariana…I have been without your touch for much too long.”
“What are you talking about? I touch you all of the time,” she said, being purposely obtuse. She had been putting off his attentions for his own well-being for over a week. Ever since he had begun feeling well enough to get out of bed.
“Let me make love to you,” he said softly, his head dipping to touch his forehead to hers. He then kissed her mouth slowly and sweetly.
“You aren’t well enough to make love to anyone,” she said with a noisy swallow.
Sin knew it was true. He was not well enough to take command of their lovemaking, to be on top of her working himself into her. But he was well enough, he believed, for other things.
“Pull up your skirts and straddle my head. I will show you how well I am.”
Ariana felt a fiery blush scorch over her cheeks at the lewd suggestion. It also made her go instantly wet with excitement. She glanced at the open door to his bedroom.
“Your mother could come in at any moment,” she said breathily.
“Close and lock the door and she will not come in.”
“I won’t encourage you to do things you shouldn’t be do—“
She was cut off when he swooped in and gave her a blisteringly hot kiss. She moaned at the intensity of it, his hands sweeping over her body everywhere he could reach as his mouth and tongue worked dream-like perfection with hers. Ariana curved against him unthinkingly and she felt him wince. She pulled back sharply.