Read A (Not So) Healthy Dose of Chaos: A New World Page 11


  “We know you’re a sensitive Cataloguer, and that was the reason you were sent to that junction. Please continue the data collection. If you feel it’s an issue, we’ll look at the data so far and determine the next course of action. On a personal matter, how is your new experience there?”

  “Unexpectedly fun. There will be a lot of cultural events in the next few months. The landlord, or owner of this house, is a responsible person. However, I get a ‘fuzzy’ feeling from him sometimes.”

  “Is that an interpersonal critique, or a concern?”

  “I’m not sure. It sure is interesting, though.”

  “How are the others around you? I’ve heard there are others living there.”

  “There are four other tenants. One from Forshe, Falldine, Kodominé and Talsenia.”

  “Are any of them space-time aware?”

  “I don’t think so.”

  “And where is your place?”

  “On top of a display cabinet in the living room.”

  Katrina heard a noise from downstairs, and talking.

  “It looks like they’re back. I’ll call back for a new update next week.”

  “Understood. Goodbye, Cataloguer Faerblood.”

  Katrina turned off the communication, and then flew down to greet Ken, Angelica, Cassandra and Alisa as they walked up the stairs. She noticed Natalia wasn’t around.

  “Natalia’s not with you?” she asked.

  “That limo is bringing her home. She should be here soon, so I’ll get the food started,” Ken said as he walked into the kitchen. Cassandra and Alisa went into their rooms and Katrina followed Ken into the kitchen and sat on his head.

  “How was your day, Katrina?”

  “It was okay. Now that everyone’s home, it’ll be better.”

  “Do you like your living space?”

  “Yeah!”

  * * *

  Ken was sitting at the dinner table going through coupons. Even though there was extra money coming in, he never knew what would happen tomorrow. It still paid to be frugal, but not as much as when he lived alone.

  The cheese and broccoli caught his eye, as did the one for bags of meatballs. No one was in the living room, and Katrina was sitting on the table, helping him go through the flyers.

  “Brus . . . bru . . . What are these?” Katrina asked.

  “Brussel sprouts. They’re like mini heads of cabbage. Want some?”

  “Let’s give it a shot.”

  “Oh, and that’s a double coupon,” Ken said, clipping it out of the advertisement.

  “And what’s this? Piz . . . za?”

  “I don’t think you all have had pizza before. That’s a coupon for a local place, so maybe we’ll order out soon.”

  They both saw Cassandra walk out of the hall from the corner of their eye.

  “Hey, Cassandra,” Ken called out, looking back to the coupons.

  “Why so glum?” Katrina asked.

  “Ken, can I ask you a question?”

  Ken put his coupons down and looked up at her. “It depends on what it is.”

  “I mean about me. I need your opinion, as an Earthling.”

  He gave her a confused look, but shrugged. “Go ahead.”

  “Do I look . . . strange?”

  “Huh?”

  “I mean, I was talking with Alisa, and the sword and outfit may be . . . odd here on Earth. I kept getting stares at college.”

  “Hmm. You want my honest opinion?”

  “Yes, your honest opinion.”

  Ken crossed his arms and looked her up and down. “Truthfully, the sword is odd. Nobody carries a sword around in this day and age, and honestly, it probably scares people.”

  “I see,” she sighed, hoping she would have heard a different critique.

  “That might have sounded different than I wanted. Maybe it would have been better to say that people aren’t used to seeing it.”

  “Oh. And what about the outfit?”

  “My personal opinion is it looks good. It shows off your hourglass figure.”

  Cassandra turned bright red. “I . . . um . . . thank you.”

  “The best thing I can say is ‘be yourself’. Don’t forget who you are. As soon as you do forget, you’ll no longer be you. If you want different clothes, I can’t give you a good opinion on what to pick out, since that’s more Natalia’s territory, I think. Above all, just be yourself, but there’s nothing wrong about changing yourself a little bit. I think you’d look good in pink and a skirt.”

  Cassandra went red again. “T-Thank you . . .” she said, and skipped back to her room.

  He turned back to the table. “So, where were we?”

  That’s when he noticed Katrina was grinning at him like an idiot.

  Ken cocked an eyebrow at her. “Yes?”

  “Is it really all right for you to be hitting on your tenants?”

  “She wanted my opinion and I gave it to her. And just where did you learn a term like ‘hitting on’?”

  “From Alisa.”

  “A-Alisa!? Her!?”

  Alisa barely talked, and made all manner of strange contraptions in her room. Ken had no idea what was going on in that technical head of hers, so he was shocked that she knew that much slang. What was being taught on their planets about Earth?

  Then Ken remembered he had just taught three of them that phrase a few hours ago.

  “You’d be surprised at what otherworlders have learned about the English language.”

  “I’m curious about any other iffy phrases you know.”

  “You know, we do compare notes when you’re not around,” Katrina said.

  “Notes? There are none about me, right?”

  Katrina turned back to the coupons. “This soup looks good.”

  “Don’t dodge the question!”

  Chapter Six

  Or, A (Not So) Healthy Dose of Neighbors!

  Cassandra and Alisa were at college, Angelica was sleeping late due to an off-schedule day, and Natalia was in her room, working on some sort of presentation, and Katrina was working on something called a ‘space-time differential data bloc,’ whatever that was.

  He let them all be.

  He was putting away dishes and utensils when he realized it was laundry day again. Starting with the top floor, he went to each of their rooms, emptied their personal hampers, and was about to wash them when he forgot to check the upstairs bathroom.

  He went up the stairs, and noticed the bathroom door was slightly ajar, but the light was off to note there was no one in there.

  No one in there but Angelica, which Ken found out when he opened the door: naked as the day was long, illuminated only by the small nightlight in the corner.

  She was drying her hair with a towel.

  “Hi, Ken!” was all she said, happily.

  Ken, in the condition that would personify the ‘deer in the headlights’ look, couldn’t move. The synapses in his brain had shut down, and his mouth dropped open wide enough to drive a semi into it.

  Then the machinery in his grey matter kicked back in, and he quickly pivoted around the corner. “What are you doing in there!?”

  “I took a shower,” he heard her say.

  “In the dark!?”

  “There’s a nightlight, and leaving the lights off saves electricity, right?”

  “For the sake of my heart, turn on the lights, okay?”

  She stepped out into the hallway, still wearing her birthday suit.

  Ken shut his eyes and put up his hands in defense. “Please put some clothes on!”

  “But they’re all downstairs.”

  “Then at least a towel!”

  “Well, okay,” she acquiesced, wrapping the towel around her body. “Would you help me dry my wings? They’re kind of hard to get at.”

  “Fine. Just get dressed first, all right?”

  * * *

  Ken was softly stroking
her wings with a bath towel. He was just hoping that no one was listening, as they would most definitely get the wrong idea about what was going on.

  “Aaahh . . .” she breathed.

  “Can’t I just use a hair dryer for this?” he asked.

  “No, since a heated dryer causes my wings to build up static for a day. I’d keep shocking everyone I touched.”

  Ken continued drying her wings.

  “Oooooh,” Angelica moaned. “You’re very gentle. You’ve done this before, haven’t you?”

  Ken groaned, but continued to dry her feathers.

  Katrina glanced down from her overlook. “Should you two be doing that out in the open?”

  Ken shook his head. He knew his stress level wasn’t about to drop any time soon.

  * * *

  Alisa was sitting alone in the electronics lab, working on a machine. A small one, about the size of a lunch box. The rest of the students had left for the day, since they only had to show their progress on their current project.

  Cold fusion was a lot harder than it looked. She didn’t tell anyone that she was working on a miniature fusion generator.

  She had already completed her other projects for the week, and was using some parts from Earth, along with some of her own equipment. When people asked what she was making, she just told them “A power supply.” It seemed to satisfy them. Telling them it was a miniature reactor would be bad, making them have a reaction worse than Ken when she used the spatial expander to increase the size of her room.

  She soldered some pieces to other pieces, and sighed as she put her tools down. She wished she could have used another tool of hers, but she forgot to bring it. Earth technology was primitive by her standards, and still had a long way to go.

  She heard a knock on the open door, and saw Cassandra.

  “Hey, Alisa.”

  “Cassandra. What are you doing here?”

  “Well, it’s lunch time. I got out a little early from class. Want to join me?”

  “Sure. I’m not going to get this finished any time soon.”

  They went downstairs to the cafeteria. Alisa ordered spaghetti, and Cassandra a hamburger.

  “Say, Alisa, if you knew danger was coming soon, what would you do?”

  “You’re asking me? Don’t you have a military background? I thought you’d be prepared for anything.”

  “Some people from my planet, maybe. Me? Not so much.”

  Alisa put her fork down. “Is there something you want to tell me?”

  “No . . . no. I just can’t shake the feeling something’s going to happen soon.”

  “Something?”

  “I wish I knew what it was,” Cassandra sighed, and then took a bite of her burger. It had been bothering her shortly after coming to the planet. It was like someone was tapping on her shoulder every now and then. It was light at first, but started to get harder and harder as the days went on.

  Alisa had been sharing her lunch break with Cassandra since they started their studies, and generally talked about their classes, and how they were adjusting to life on Earth. But it was the first time Alisa had seen her fellow tenant more serious than usual.

  “There she is! Cassandra!”

  Cassandra heard a familiar voice from across the room. She looked up and saw Jill, along with Guy and Nellie.

  Cassandra waved them over.

  “Friends of yours?” Alisa asked.

  “Yeah. We’ve only talked on the phone a few times though, and talk before and after class.”

  The trio came to the table.

  “We’ve been looking for you,” Jill announced in her usual hyper self.

  “Me? What for?”

  “Hold it, hold it, Jill,” Guy chided his sister. “There’s someone else at the table here, isn’t there?”

  “Oh, sorry.”

  Cassandra realized they had never met Alisa before. “This is my friend and fellow tenant, Alisa Maestral.”

  Nellie took a long look at Alisa. “Are you . . . ?”

  Alisa looked at Cassandra for a way to respond to her vague question.

  Cassandra nodded. “Yes. She’s another otherworlder.”

  “You look so normal!” Jill reacted.

  Guy lightly knocked his sister on the head with his knuckles. “You’re being rude, sister of mine.” He leaned toward Alisa. “I’m very sorry. My sister tends to say what’s on her mind.”

  “That’s all right. You all look normal, too.”

  Guy laughed, and understood what she was getting at. “I’m Guy, this is Jill, and our friend Nellie.”

  “Nice to meet you all.”

  “Any particular reason you were looking for me?” Cassandra asked Guy.

  Jill cut in, getting really close to Cassandra. “We’re going to see a triple feature this weekend at a local theater. We were wondering if you wanted to come with us!”

  Cassandra leaned away. “What’s a ‘triple feature’?”

  Guy pulled his sister out of Cassandra’s face. “It’s three movies in a row. You’ve seen movies before, right?”

  Cassandra nodded. “Of course. We have movies on Talsenia.”

  “Good. Jill wants to see the Deluxe Limited Advanced Extended Anniversary editions of the last three movies in the Star Doors series. Have you seen them?”

  “I don’t . . . believe so. I haven’t seen many Earth movies.”

  “Well, they’re science fiction movies. Not my cup of tea, but,” pointing to his sister, “I lost a bet, so I had to buy advance tickets. Jill’s into sci-fi, and Nellie’s never seen them before.”

  “So, we were wondering if you wanted to go with us,” Jill asked.

  “Jill, there’s someone else at the table.”

  “Good idea, Guy! Alisa, do you want to come, too?”

  “I’m not one to see movies.”

  Jill gave her a disappointed look. “Oh, well. I wanted some opinions from people not from planet about if they have things like beamsabers and BT-BTs.”

  Alisa’s eyes went wide. “Beam . . . sabers?”

  “Yeah. But, oh well.”

  “I’ll go.”

  Cassandra looked at her fellow tenant strangely, given the quick change of heart.

  “Okay, how about we meet at the shopping mall on Saturday? Cassandra, I’ll give you a call tonight with all the details, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  “See you both later,” Guy said as the trio left.

  “Say, Alisa, what’s a ‘beamsaber’?”

  “I’m not sure myself, but considering I’ve been asked before in class and I don’t know, we’re going to find out.”

  * * *

  There was a knock at the back door.

  “Kenny!” shouted a young, female voice.

  Ken, who was in the kitchen, opened the back door and outside was a half-pint, cute, ten year old girl dressed in shorts and a t-shirt. She pushed her strawberry blonde hair away from her freckled face, and gave him a smile as wide as the Atlantic Ocean.

  “Hi, Stacey. How’s summer vacation going?”

  He stepped back and she came in.

  “Not bad. Do you have an ice pop?”

  “Banana or blueberry? Or, I’ve got rocket pops.”

  “Rocket pop!”

  Curious about the commotion, Katrina fluttered into the kitchen.

  Stacey’s eyes went wide. “It’s a pixie!”

  Katrina looked at Ken. “What’s a pixie?”

  “A small, flying girl or boy. With wings.”

  “But I don’t call myself a pixie.”

  “Then what are you?” Stacey asked.

  “I’m from a planet called Betlin.”

  “You’re an alien pixie? That’s neat!”

  Ken went to the freezer and pulled out a wrapped multi-colored ice treat that was in the vague shape of a rocket. He handed it to her.

  She quickly unwrapp
ed it and started eating.

  Curious as well, Cassandra came in from the living room. Her face brightened when she saw Stacey. “She’s adorable! What’s your name?”

  “Stacey Pierson. I live two houses down. What’s your name?”

  “Cassandra.”

  Stacey glanced up to Ken. “Did you get married since the last time I saw you?”

  “No!”

  “Are you another alien?” she asked of Cassandra.

  “Yes.”

  “Wow. I met two aliens in five minutes.”

  Alisa and Natalia came into the kitchen, too.

  “More aliens!” Stacey shouted.

  “Whose child is this?” Natalia quizzically asked.

  “I live two houses down.”

  Alisa just stared at Stacey.

  “What?” Stacey asked. “Is there something on my face?”

  “C-Cute . . .”

  Stacey looked around at all the female aliens.

  “Wow, Ken, you know a lot of girls. You’re a ‘player,’ aren’t you?”

  Ken went white.

  “Ken?” Natalia asked. “What’s a ‘player’?”

  “Where did you learn that!?” Ken asked Stacey.

  “I don’t know. I think I heard it on TV. Why? What does ‘player’ mean?”

  “You’ll find out when you’re older.” And he rushed to change the subject. “What’s the plan for today, Stacey?”

  “Four-leaf clovers, praying mantises and foxes.”

  “Seems like a busy day. Any luck so far?”

  “No . . .” She looked at Katrina. “Want to help me?”

  “What’s a four-leaf clover?” Katrina wondered.

  “The luckiest flower on the planet!”

  “What’s a praying mantis?”

  “The neatest insect on the planet!”

  “Careful,” Ken cautioned. “Don’t mess with them. They’re a protected species.”

  “I know. I just want to look at them. I saw a baby one last year, and it was so tiny! It was hanging on a wall, and it was really windy out, and was hanging on as hard as it could!”

  Katrina flew over and landed on Stacey’s head. “Let’s go!”

  “Okay!” She stepped over to Ken and gave him a hug. “Bye, Kenny!”

  He hugged her back. “See you in a few hours.”

  She headed out the door with rocket pop in hand, and Katrina on head.

  “Ah. The joys of youth,” he said, watching her disappear.

  Ken had the feeling he was being stared at. He turned around, and was being stared at.

  “W-What?”

  Natalia smiled. “It looks like you have an unexpected soft spot for kids.”

  “Seems like he would be a good father,” Alisa added.