_Owlglass in the Smithy._]
[Decoration]
XVII.
_How Owlglass hired himself to a Merchant as Cook and Coachman._
In the town of Windsheim there lived a rich merchant, who was walkingone day outside the town, when he saw Owlglass lying on the grass, andstopping, he asked him what his calling was. Owlglass answered that hewas a cook; whereupon the Merchant said, "You are just the man I want,that is, if you understand your business; for my wife is not at allsatisfied with her present cook, and we have some of the first peopleof the town to dine with us to-morrow, to whom we would like to givea good dinner." Owlglass said that he would serve him faithfully, andthat he felt confident of giving satisfaction; so the merchant engagedhim, stipulating that he should also serve as coachman, and took himhome with him at once. As soon as the merchant's wife saw Owlglass,she said, "Who is this fellow whom you have brought home with you, forI do not like the look of him at all?" Her husband answered, "Nevermind his look, my Dear, for he is a first-rate cook, and we will serveup a dinner to-morrow that shall be the envy of the whole town." Earlythe next morning the Merchant gave Owlglass full instructions as tothe dinner, telling him what soup, meat, and vegetables to get, andhow he liked everything done. "As for game," he added, "ProfessorGuzzle is particularly fond of roast hare, so we cannot do betterthan let him have his favourite puss; but, mind, let it be the finestthat can be got in the whole town." Owlglass promised that all hisinstructions should be strictly attended to; and the Merchant, havingbusiness of importance to attend to, went out in easy confidence inhis new servant. The Merchant got home only just in time to receivehis guests, so that he could not visit the kitchen before dinner, andhis wife was too fine a lady to attend to such matters. However, thedinner went off very well, and the hare, in particular, was declaredto be the finest that had been seen that year; so that all the companywere in high spirits. At dessert the conversation turned upon cats;and one of the ladies, addressing the mistress of the house, said shehad heard that she had the finest one in the whole town. The Merchant'swife was very proud of her cat, and gave orders that it should bebrought into the room; but it could not be found anywhere; and now theservants remembered that they had not seen it since the morning, whenone of them saw Owlglass carry it from the kitchen to an outhouse.Owlglass was now sent for into the dining-room, before all the guests,and questioned as to what had become of the cat. Without being in theslightest degree disconcerted, he said his master had told him thatProfessor Guzzle was very fond of roast hare, and that they could notdo better than let him have his favourite puss, and therefore he,Owlglass, was to be sure and get the very finest in the town; that hehad searched the whole town through, but there were none to compare tothe one in the house, and he was sure his master would not begrudge ithis guests; therefore he had killed and roasted it, and the companyhad just eaten it. Horror was depicted upon most of the countenances,whilst one or two of the guests tried to joke about it; but these thevery first showed symptoms of distress, and one after another of thecompany had to leave the room pale as death, and not one returned.The mistress insisted upon Owlglass being at once sent away; butthe Merchant said, "I want him to drive me and the priest to Goslarto-morrow, and when we get back I will immediately send him about hisbusiness." That evening he told Owlglass to get the carriage ready forthe morrow, and to grease it well. As soon as all had gone to bed,Owlglass took some cart grease and greased the carriage outside and in,but particularly the seats. Early the next morning the Merchant orderedthe horses to be put to the carriage, and he and the priest getting in,they drove off in high spirits. They had not gone far, however, whenthey found they were gradually slipping off the seats; and the Priestexclaimed, "What is all this grease? I held on with my hands to checkthe jolting, and I am all grease." They ordered Owlglass to stop, andthey found they were covered with grease; so that they had to buy abundle of straw from a farmer and rub themselves and the carriagewell. The Merchant had now lost all patience, and he cried out toOwlglass, "I find out now that you are a professed wag, and of themost mischievous class; but you are in the right road, go on, my goodFriend, straight to the gallows, and there your journey will be at anend." Owlglass did as he was bid, for, turning off the road, he drovestraight to a gallows which stood at no great distance, and stoppingthere began to take the horses out of the carriage. "What are you doingnow, you rascal?" the Merchant exclaimed. Owlglass answered, "You toldme to go straight to the gallows, and that there my journey would be atan end, so I naturally thought that we were to stop here." The Merchantlooked out of the carriage, and seeing that they were indeed under thegallows, could not help laughing. He said, "You have delayed us solong on the road with your foolery that I am afraid we shall not reachGoslar in time for our business, so now, my good Fellow, I pray youget on as fast as you can. Do not look behind you, but mind only theroad before you." Owlglass now again mounted his horse, having firstloosened the pin connecting the front wheels, and set off as fast asthe horses could gallop. He had not gone far when the pin fell out;but, without looking behind him, he galloped on, carrying off the poleand front wheels, and leaving the body of the carriage far behind. Invain the Priest and Merchant shouted to him to stop. On he went; sothey had to jump out of the carriage, and by scrambling through hedgesand running across fields they were, fortunately, able to overtakehim. Complaint was useless; and as they found they could not now reachGoslar in time, even if their coachman could be trusted to take themthere, they determined upon returning home. The homeward journey wasaccomplished without any further accident; and when the Merchant foundhimself safe in his own house, he called Owlglass to him and said, "Itis but too evident that all the mischief you have done since you havebeen with me has been done purposely. What have you to say to this?"Owlglass answered, "I do everything strictly to the letter, as I amtold, and if I do wrong, the fault is therefore not mine, but the faultof those who give the orders. You do not seem satisfied, so, if you payme my wages, I would rather look for justice elsewhere." The Merchantthinking it better to avoid further, and perhaps worse, mischief bygetting rid of him at once, paid him, and they parted.
_Owlglass's "skilful" Coachmanship._]
[Decoration]
XVIII.
_How Owlglass cheated a Horse-dealer at Wismar, and afterwards cheated the Public._
Owlglass next went to Wismar, a town much frequented by horse-dealers,and one of these had a habit of pulling the tail of any horse hethought of buying. This he did from a notion that, if the hair werefirm in the tail, the horse was strong, and would live long; but if, onthe contrary, the hair came out freely, that the animal would not lastlong, and he would therefore have nothing to do with it. Owlglass knewof this habit, and determined to make some profit of it, so he bought ahorse without a tail, which he got very cheap on that account, and mostartfully he fastened a beautifully flowing tail to the bare stump, bymeans of blood and gum. With this horse he went to Wismar, and asked sohigh a price that no one would bid for it, until the dealer came whosehabit it was to pull the horses' tails, and him he asked a very lowprice. Before striking a bargain, the Horse-dealer, as usual, caughthold of the tail, and having formed a favourable opinion of the animal,gave it, perhaps, a harder tug than customary, when, lo and behold, thetail remained in his hands, and he measured his length upon the ground.A shout of laughter arose on all sides; but that was not enough forOwlglass, who cried out, at the highest pitch of his voice, "See here!the villain has ruined my horse, for, beautiful creature that it is,who would have it without a tail?" The people drew nearer and took partwith Owlglass, so that the Horse-dealer had to pay him ten pounds forthe damage done to his horse, and Owlglass laughed more heartily thanany one, though only to himself.
He rode out of Wismar in high spirits, his trick having succeeded sowell; and as soon as he was outside the town he fastened the tailon again, intending to sell the horse in the next town. As he rodealong, however, he thought of some other way how to make money by hishorse, befo
re finally parting with it. In pursuance of the plan he hadformed, he stopped at an inn two or three miles distant from the town,where he intended to put his plan into execution. Here he remained tillit had grown dark, so that he might enter the town unseen; which havingdone, he hired a stable, and having put up his horse, and attended toit himself, he locked the stable-door, putting the key in his pocket.
The next morning he had it cried through the town that there was ahorse to be shown with its tail where its head should be, stating acertain hour at which only it could be seen. Before the appointed timehe made all necessary preparations in the stable, when he again lockedthe door and then stood before it, waiting the arrival of the curious.Now, as curiosity was pretty general in the town, there was a numerousattendance; and when Owlglass judged that all the company to beexpected had arrived, he collected the admission price from each, andthen threw the door open.
There was a general rush, followed by laughter from some, and indignantcomplaints from others, as they saw the horse, no different in itselfto other horses, but fastened with its tail to the manger instead ofits head.
_The Horse's Tail where his Head should be._]
XIX.
_How Owlglass sowed Rogues._
We next meet with Owlglass in a town where he remained so long that heknew all the secrets of the place. By turns he took up his abode intwelve different inns, so that what had escaped him in one he was sureto hear in another, and it was little good he heard in either. For along while he puzzled his brain what he could best do to suit the goodpeople among whom he had the honour of living, when, at length, he hitupon a novel fancy, and, going into the market-place, he began sowing,up and down, sideways and crossways, the seed being represented bysmall pebbles. The people came in crowds, and to their questions whathe was sowing, answered that he was sowing rogues. The people criedout, "Those are not wanted here, for we have more than enough of them;and, pray, why do you not sow honest men as well?" He answered, "Thosewill not grow here." These words were reported to the Town Council,who had him called before them, and ordered him to pick up his seedagain, and then leave the town. His seed he could not well pick up;but he left the town, and after travelling about ten miles, came toanother. Here, however, the report of his wonderful seed had reachedbefore him, so that he was not allowed to stop there, but had to passthrough as quickly as possible. There was no help for it, so, escortedby the town authorities, he went down to the side of a river, whichflowed through the town, and there hired a boat to carry him and hisseed. He jumped into the boat, but when the boatman raised his bag tolift that in, it burst and all the seed fell out. Owlglass pushed offthe boat, crying out to the astonished spectators that he left themhis seed, for he was sure that in such a highly virtuous town a fewrogues were required to keep up a proper balance; and when he reachedthe opposite side, leaving the boat to the mercy of the stream, he ranon his way. Whether the seed took root or not is not said; but to judgeby the quantity of rogues in the world, it would seem it did, and thatOwlglass sowed some of the same sort in other parts of the world.
_Owlglass sowing Rogues._]
XX.
_How Owlglass hired himself to a Barber, and entered his House through the Window._
Once upon a time Owlglass went to the city of Hamburg, and havingreached the market-place he there stood still and looked about him.Whilst he was standing there a man came up to him and asked what he waslooking out for. Owlglass saw at once, by his questioner's appearance,what business he followed, answered that he was a barber and wasseeking employment. "Well met then," his new acquaintance said, "for Ijust happen to be in want of a barber's assistant, and I dare say weshall be able to come to a satisfactory arrangement together. I livein that high house just opposite. You see those windows that reachdown to the ground. Go in there, and I will follow you presently."Owlglass answered, "Yes." Then crossing the road walked straightthrough the window, with a terrific crash, and made a polite bow tothose within the room. The barber's wife sat there spinning, and, beingmuch frightened, cried out for help, saying, "Here is a madman comethrough the window." Owlglass said to her, "My good Lady, pray be notangry, for the master bid me come in here, having just hired me as hisassistant." "May the foul fiend take you," the lady answered, for shewas not possessed of the most even temper, "a pretty assistant youare. Was the door not wide enough for you, that you must needs come inthrough the window?" Owlglass answered, "My dear Madam, must not anassistant do as his master bids him?" Just then the Barber entered,and seeing all the destruction around him, exclaimed, "What does allthis mean?" Owlglass addressed him thus, "You said to me, you see thosewindows that reach down to the ground--go in there, and I will followyou presently. Now this good lady is angry that I have broken thewindow, but how could I help doing so, as it was not open? It seems tome that I have the most reason to complain, for I might have cut myselfto pieces in doing what I was told to do; but I hope whatever may bethe danger I shall never shrink from doing my duty. Now, excuse me tothe lady I beseech you, my dear Master, for you see I could not avoidcausing the mischief that has happened."
_Owlglass walks through the Barber's Window._]
The poor Barber knew not what to say, so thought he might as well notsay anything; besides, he wanted his assistance, and was in hopes hemight be induced to accept more reasonable terms in consideration ofthe damage he had done. He now gave Owlglass some razors to sharpen,and as they were somewhat rusty at the backs, he said, "Brighten upthe backs; indeed, make them quite like the edge." Owlglass took therazors and made the backs as sharp as the edges, so that the Barber,when he went to see what he was doing, exclaimed, "This is not right!""How not right?" Owlglass said; "are the backs not sharp enough? Buthave a little patience and they shall be quite like the edges, as youtold me to make them. You see they had got very blunt at the backs, butafter a little more sharpening you will be satisfied with them." "Areyou an idiot?" the Master cried in a rage; "or is all this mischiefdone intentionally? Leave the sharpening and pack yourself off back towhere you came from." "Well," Owlglass said, "I see we should not behappy together for all our lives, so I may as well go at once;" and hewalked out through the window as he had gone in. The Barber was stillmore enraged at this, and ran after him to have him seized and lockedup till he paid for the broken window; but Owlglass was too quick forhim, reached a ship that was just about to sail, and was off.
[Decoration]
XXI.
_How Owlglass frightened an Innkeeper at Eisleben with a dead Wolf._
In the depth of winter Owlglass put up at an inn at Eisleben, whereone evening there also arrived three merchants from Saxony on theirway to Nurenberg. They related how they had been attacked by a wolf,against which they had much difficulty in defending themselves, andthat this disagreeable adventure had considerably delayed them. Thehost, who was a bragging sarcastic sort of a person, joked them muchabout their adventure, declaring that it was a shame they should allowthemselves to be delayed by a miserable wolf; that, for his part, ifhe were attacked by two wolves, he would soon drive them off, but herethree were frightened by one wolf. This continued all the eveningtill the merchants went to bed, Owlglass in the mean time remainingsilent, but turning it over in his mind how he could best play minehost some trick to pay him off for his bragging. The merchants andOwlglass shared the same bed-room; and when the former discussed amongthemselves how they could repay the mocking of the Innkeeper, Owlglasssaid he had been thinking it over, and that if they would leave itto him he would engage that they should hear no more about the wolf.The merchants readily agreed, promising a handsome reward if he paidtheir tormentor off well; and Owlglass then proposed that they shouldcontinue their journey, and all meet again there on their return. Earlythe next morning the merchants paid the reckoning for Owlglass, as wellas for themselves, and rode on their way, mine host calling after themto beware lest a wolf should cross their path. Owlglass also took hisdeparture and went on the chase after a wolf. He succeeded in killingone, which he
left out in the cold till it was frozen quite stiff, andwhen the merchants returned he put his prize in a sack, and, taking itwith him, joined them at the inn as agreed upon. The Innkeeper againteased his guests about the wolf, talking very big of how he wouldact. When the merchants went to their bed-room Owlglass joined them,and said, "My good Friends, keep your candle burning, and do not goto bed yet, for we will have some sport this night." Now, as soon asall the household had gone to bed, Owlglass fetched the dead wolf,which was hard frozen, and taking it to the kitchen placed it near thehearth, supporting it with sticks so that it stood upright, at the sametime opening its jaws in which he put a child's shoe. Then, quietlyreturning to his room, he called loudly for something to drink. Whenthe Innkeeper heard this he grumbled at being disturbed, and callingup the maid told her to get some beer for his guests. The maid went tothe fire in the kitchen to light a candle, and seeing the wolf with itsjaws wide open, rushed out into the yard, thinking the brute had surelydevoured the children. Owlglass and the merchants continued to call fordrink, and the Innkeeper, thinking the maid had gone to sleep again,called the man. He went to the fire to light a candle, and when he sawthe wolf, thought it had made away with the maid, so he too ran outinto the yard. The shouting for drink still continuing, the Innkeeperthought the man must be asleep as well as the maid, and, grumblinglike a bear, he himself got up. As soon as he had lighted a candle hesaw the wolf with the shoe in its jaws, and running to the merchant'sroom, trembling with terror, cried out, "Come and help me, my dearFriends, for there is a frightful monster in the kitchen, which hasdevoured my children, maid, and man servant." They went with him; thegirl and the man came from the yard, and the wife brought the children.All were alive. Owlglass then went up to the wolf, which he turned overwith his foot, and it did not stir; then turning to the Innkeeper,said, "What an arrant coward you are! It is not long ago that yousaid you were ready to fight two wolves, and just now you ran away,trembling and shouting, from a dead one." The Merchants made rare funof mine host, and the next morning, after paying the bill, took theirdeparture with Owlglass.