body. She managed to get out one question.
“When is the funeral?”
“They haven’t decided yet,” Scott said.
“My mom is supposed to let us know, but I'm driving there now.”
“That's a long way to drive. Are you sure we'll be alright?” Charlie questioned.
“No, not really . But I think the drive will give me time to process all of this,” Mike answered her.
She began to pack her bags with the most important things. They took her things to the car. Scott was no longer riding shotgun. He yielded the front of the car to Mike and Charlie. They continued down the road for endless hours. Charlie thought that Mike looked tired.
“Do you want me to drive some?” she asked.
“Don’t bother. He wants to drive the whole way,” Scott said.
“You don’t have to do this on your own, you know. That’s what friends are for,” Charlie told him.
“I’m fine, really. We can get us something to eat and find a motel to stay in.”
So they did, somewhere in Indiana. They got a single room with two double beds because it was the cheapest. Charlie got into the shower while Mike watched television. Anything to keep his mind off of death. Scott stood looking out the window and thought about how wonderful and precious life was, and that the living shouldn’t take it for granted. Still, we are all guilty of doing that at sometime or another. Charlie came out of the bathroom, closed the curtains and sat down and began to blow dry her hair. Mike came out of his daze and looked at her and thought how beautiful she was, but that he wouldn’t tell her because she didn’t seem interested in him anymore. Charlie finished, then stretched out and lay back on the bed. She closed her eyes and was soon asleep. “Looks like we’ll be sharing tonight,” Scott said.
Mike laughed a little and then fell into bed. He slept immediately because he was so exhausted. The next morning Mike woke up and glanced over at Charlie, who was still asleep. Scott was out on the balcony watching the sunrise. It was more beautiful than he had ever remembered it. It was like he was seeing it through new eyes. Death seems to make us all more wary of the things in life we take for granted. He walked back into the motel room and sat on the chair near the TV. Charlie woke up, stretched, and shuddered. “It sure is cold in here,” she said.
Mike walked over to the thermostat and checked it. He adjusted it and sat down on the other bed. Charlie got up and sat beside him.
“Thanks,” she said simply.
“For what?” he asked.
“For coming to tell me about it. I don’t think I could have taken that kind of news over the phone. I would have needed you to be there with me for something like that.” She hugged him as she started to cry.
They gathered their belongings and headed down to the car. They stopped at a diner and ordered breakfast, but Mike and Charlie just picked at the food in front of them, too grief stricken to eat much of anything. When they felt they had eaten enough to hold them over they got back into the car. They continued on, Charlie and Scott both looking out of the window watching the world go by. Mike was just concentrating on driving to keep from thinking about his friend and breaking down and having an accident. Charlie turned on the radio. To their surprise it was one of the songs they all loved. That had a special meaning for Mike and Charlie. Atlantic Starr's Am I dreaming.
“Hey, do you guys remember this song from…” Scott began.
“Our eighth grade dance,” Charlie said.
“The first time we kissed. The next day you told me you didn't mean it. That it was a joke,” Mike said.
“ At the time I was afraid you didn't feel the same way I did,” Charlie admitted.
“Just the four of us,” Scott said.
“I’m going to really miss him,” Charlie said.
“Me too,” Mike added.
“You know it was killing him, us not being together,” Charlie said.
“Was it? He never told me,” Mike said.
“It was,” Scott said.
They enjoyed the nostalgic feeling that the song gave them as they thundered down the road. It was early afternoon and they decided to stop and get something to eat. They pulled into a sandwich shop and sat down again. They weren’t really hungry, just knew they needed to get something to eat. As Charlie poked at her food she looked like she wanted to talk about something, but then decided not to. They were back on the road and it was starting to be early evening when Mike’s phone rang. Charlie answered it. Mike’s mom was on the phone. The funeral was going to be the day after tomorrow. She told them to be careful and not to overdo it. They pulled into a fast food restaurant, got something to eat, and went to a motel. Charlie finally worked up enough courage to say what was on her mind.
“Why did you go back to school without me?”
“I felt it was time to let you go. So I did.”
“Don’t argue, please not now,” Scott said.
“You could have at least told me you were leaving early,” Charlie said.
“Why?” Mike asked.
“It would have been the right thing to do. We could have talked about it,” Charlie said.
“I felt like you just weren’t into me anymore, and that I was smothering you. So I made the decision to back off,” Mike said.
“I have never not been into you, but you are all I know. I wanted to make sure that I wasn’t missing out on other experiences in life. I wanted you to do the same,” Charlie reminded him.
“Well, what did you find out?” Mike asked Charlie.
“That nobody knows me as well as you do,” she said .
“Meaning what exactly?” Mike asked.
“Meaning I love you and I always have,” Charlie said.
Mike smiled as he felt the spring of life reenergizing his body. He felt warm all over despite the coolness in the room. He looked into Charlie’s beautiful green eyes and hugged her. Then they kissed. Scott got up and walked toward the door.
“I’m leaving before this gets X rated,” he said as passed out of the room, leaving the two of them alone.
They kissed passionately. It had been quite a while since the last time they had been together romantically. Mike was glad to finally know Charlie felt the same way about him that he felt about her. Afterward, Charlie went and got into the shower. Scott was back in the room sitting by the TV. Mike was thinking about the funeral that was two days away. They could make it tomorrow if they cut back on their stops.
“Don’t over do it. You need to get there in one piece,” Scott said.
“I had better take it easy. I don’t want to kill anymore of us,” Mike said, but immediately regretted the thought.
Charlie came out of the shower, her hair still wet, and wearing the towel that she had dried off with. Mike went into the bathroom and got a quick shower; the hot water felt good. When he got out he saw a message scrawled on the bathroom mirror. “I love you, man.”
He smiled and went back out to the main room. Charlie was already in bed asleep. He got into bed with her and she snuggled up to him. Soon he was asleep too. Scott smiled and thought that it was about time that they were both on the same page again. He was glad to see it.
In the morning, Mike was contemplating the drive home and how long it would take. They had made it as far as Tennessee and driving across North Carolina could take forever, depending on the route. They loaded the car once more, hoping that this would be the last time. They stopped and picked up something at a drive thru, and stopped again to gas up once they were in North Carolina. They picked up lunch from another drive thru window. Time seemed to be on their side. Charlie reached over and held Mike’s hand, then looked back behind them. Scott smiled at her. She then turned and fixed her gaze on Mike. She felt bad for distancing herself from him, but she hadn't wanted to commit to him completely with regrets of having not lived life first. On her journey she found out life isn’t worth living unless you have someone special to live life with. Mike had always been there, from
the first day of kindergarten until now, and she knew he always would be.
They finally pulled up to Charlie’s house around midnight. Her dad helped them get her things inside. She kissed Mike and told him to get some rest. He went home to his parents' house, taking Scott with him. He hadn’t been able to get a hold of anyone to give his condolences. It made him feel bad. He didn’t want his friend’s wife and family feeling he didn’t care about them.
“I feel bad. They have to understand I am hurting as bad as they are. I still don’t want to believe it,” Mike said.
“They understand,” Scott said.
He began to feel a little better and finally went to sleep. He was up at about eight the next morning. The service was going to be at noon. He finally talked to his friend's wife and mom. They were just glad to know that Mike and Charlie made it okay. They told him that his mom had let them know that he was coming. They said he would be delighted to know that Mike had driven all that way just for him. He told them he would see them later, then began to get dressed. He called Charlie and told her he would be by to pick her up soon. He walked out onto the porch and smelled the air. He loved being at home. He just hated the reason for being home. Scott had been waiting for him to come outside. Mike had on a black suit with a white shirt. Scott had on an ash gray suit with a light blue shirt and a tie with gray in it. They both looked like people he didn't know. Mike’s car sat in the driveway for about ten minutes.
“Not going won’t make this go