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Everyone laughed. Anna could just envision Hunter, who was always so in charge, being distressed over the pregnancy.
Then Tessa said, “Bjornolf was just as bad when you were upset, Anna. Hunter said he’d never seen one of his fellow SEALs crash that hard. That was before Hunter was having a stroke over my coming here. ”
Anna wondered how Bjornolf would react if he ever made her pregnant. Then she let out her breath. She didn’t know if she could ever have babies again.
Greta said, “When I had my babies, Caruthers threw up. Worst of it was, he got my overnight bag in the car and was backing out of the drive before he remembered to take me! I was moving kind of slow with triplets at the time. ”
The ladies laughed.
Meara glanced at Anna, then took a deep breath. “Maybe we shouldn’t tell all these stories in front of Tessa. She’s due any second. ”
“Nonsense. ” Tessa looked at the sweater that Meara was wearing and frowned. “Are you gaining weight?”
Every eye turned to stare at Meara’s sparkly Christmas tree sweater. “Twins, next spring. ”
“Ha!” Tessa said. “Does Finn know?”
“I told him right before we came over here. He’s thrilled. ”
Everyone congratulated her and then grew quiet.
Tessa said to Anna, “Maybe you need to talk to Bjornolf about what’s troubling you. ”
Anna was tough. She had to be. She’d worn a coat of armor for years. But this was the hardest thing she’d ever have to do.
“You have to trust him,” Tessa said. “He’s your mate. ”
Anna nodded.
“We’re leaving and sending him in here. Okay?”
“Okay. ”
“If someone will help me up from the bench,” Tessa said.
Anna could not imagine being that full of babies again, and when she cast a look at Jessica to see her take on it, she looked like she was thinking the same thing.
Meara said, “I’ll get Hunter. ” She hurried out of the room and quickly returned with both Hunter and Bjornolf.
He looked worried. Anna hated how she’d hit such a low spot and he was the one who had to put up with her.
Hunter helped Tessa up and escorted her out of the bedroom.
The other ladies left the room, and Meara shut the door behind her.
“Some potentially good news,” Bjornolf said as he sat on the bed and put his arm around Anna. “If the plans for the tree plantings are any indication, we might be able to pinpoint the location of the bodies. Hunter’s going to have the police get on it. ”
“That’s good,” she said, genuinely meaning it. For a moment, she thought she might just skip telling him about her past.
“You know you can tell me anything, Anna. You’re the most important person in the world to me. ”
She took a deep breath. This was it. She had to get it off her chest. He deserved to know. Maybe… he could help her deal with it. “I haven’t told anyone this… since it happened. Years and years ago. ”
He kissed her cheek. “You’re the first one I confided in about the bear killing my friend. ”
She nodded. He was right. He’d bared his soul to her and it was time for her to do the same. She took a deep breath. “Okay. I was fifteen the first time I kissed a wolf. He was…” She paused. “Older. Cocky. I really liked him. All alpha. I had these notions that if I loved him and he loved me, we’d become mated wolves. ”
She felt Bjornolf stiffen a bit.
She shook her head. “My parents were never nurturing. I needed somebody to love who would love me in return. I thought he could be that someone. ”
She harrumphed. “My past was so gray and murky that I don’t remember a time when I ever received a Christmas gift. My parents should never have had me. I always suspected I was a fluke, unintentional. I even had the notion that they weren’t my real parents. And then they were murdered. ”
Bjornolf rubbed her arm. She appreciated his comforting touch, when she would have pulled away in the past.
“So when I met Rory, I thought he would be good for me. He even gave me a gift. New hair ribbons. I was so naive. He forced himself on me. He didn’t want me. He left, and… I learned I was pregnant. ”
“At fifteen,” Bjornolf said, his voice quiet.
“With twins. A boy and a girl. I was too young to have babies. They arrived seventeen weeks early on Christmas Day. Even today, many premature babies die. Back then, they had no chance of survival. I was devastated. ” She took another deep breath and expelled it.
“I used some of the money I received after my parents’ deaths to buy a small child’s coffin and headstone and buried them together, just as the twins had been snuggled next to each other in my womb. A minister spoke last rites for that young girl’s twin babies—that’s how I looked at it. Like I wasn’t even there. And then I buried the recollections as best I could. ” She glanced up at him and saw the look of love in his eyes.
“I should have told you earlier, Bjornolf. I’m sorry. ”
He pulled her into his embrace and held on tight, kissing her hair and keeping her close. “I’m sorry you had to go through that alone. You know you can tell me anything. I’m always here for you. ”
She nodded.
“You’re not worried about what I think, are you?”
She didn’t say anything.
“You thought I wouldn’t still love you? God, Anna, I do love you, no matter what. ”
“What… what if we can’t have children?” she asked, softly.
He hugged her. “That’s nothing to worry about. If we have children, that’s great. If we don’t, that’s fine, too. Besides, we’re kind of busy taking care of two nearly grown kids anyway. ”
She smiled a little at him. “Yeah, we are. ”
He cleared his throat and seemed to want to say something else, but was afraid to.
“What?”
“Is the wolf dead?” he growled. Gone was the soothing, caring Bjornolf. And in his place was a retired SEAL wolf who was ready to mete out justice on her behalf.
“Yeah, he is. The minister’s brother killed the wolf right after I’d buried my babies. I love you, you know?”
“Yeah. And the feeling’s mutual. ” He gave her a knowing smile.
They heard more voices in the living room. The open house had begun.
“I’ve got to get dressed,” Anna said, sighing. She was ready to have a new outlook on the holidays. She was ready to truly forget the past. But she knew she couldn’t. Some memories never went away.
“Are you going to be all right?” he asked, concerned, running his hand soothingly over her back.
“Yeah, thanks. ”
“Need any help?”
“Dressing? Or undressing?” she asked, moving to the closet. He was good for her.
Bjornolf chuckled. “If I help with either, we’ll miss the party. I’ll just enjoy the show. Are you ready for us to tell Hunter we want to join his pack?”
Anna slipped into her black dress, the back cut low and sexy, and black heels. She smiled when she saw Bjornolf’s tongue practically hang out, and held out her hand to him. “Yeah, I am. Ready to join the party?”
“If we weren’t hoping to join Hunter and Tessa’s pack, I’d skip the party. ”
She smiled and kissed him thoroughly, his hands stroking down her naked back and over her buttocks, the silky fabric sliding with his touch. She finally sighed and said, “Let’s go before we decide we don’t need a pack. ”
“I’ve been thinking,” Bjornolf said, her hand in his, “it’s time I saw my brother again. It’s been years. I’d… like to take you to meet him. ”
She snapped her gaping mouth shut and smiled at him. “I’d like that. ”
***
The decorated homes for the pack’s open-house parade were lovely. Bjornolf kept Anna tucked
under his arm for most of the night as they visited one house after another, meeting each of the pack members. Nathan was as proud as could be and kept his arm around Jessica’s waist the whole time.
Bjornolf thought Anna was more beautiful than any sparkly lights or glamorous Christmas decorations. She seemed like a whole new person in the sexy black dress that caught everyone’s eye, along with her long legs, high heels, and low-cut bodice. She smelled sweet and delicious—of oranges and cinnamon, and of the apple cider she’d been drinking. And they had a wonderful time. He couldn’t wait to get her home and spend the rest of the night making love to her if she was up to it.
He managed to walk outside at Tessa and Hunter’s home and sneak a call to Reid while Anna was talking to some of the women.
“Hey, Reid—”
“Bjornolf—”
“I don’t need the information. Okay? Don’t look anymore. ”
“Okay. The guy’s dead. ”
Angry that a wolf could have done what he did to her, Bjornolf clenched his teeth. Reid had found the information. But like him, that’s the first thing he had wanted to know—was the bastard who’d taken advantage of Anna still alive?
“Thanks,” Bjornolf said. “I owe you—”
“Lots,” Reid said. “Give that little wolf of yours a hug and a kiss for me. Merry Christmas. ”
“Yeah, same to you. ”
Bjornolf let out his breath, frosty mist in the cold air, and headed back to the house. Everything was going to be all right.
As soon as he walked inside, Anna frowned a little at him. He quickly joined her and said, “Come on, before we chicken out. Let’s tell Hunter and Tessa the good news. ”
She smiled. “Maybe they won’t see it that way. ”
He chuckled. “His pack will be lucky to get us. ”
They found Tessa and Hunter pouring more wassail. Both turned to see what they had to say.
“We’ve got good news,” Bjornolf said. “Well, unless you don’t want us to join your pack. ”