The sensations surrounded me, overwhelmed me. There was the scent of him, spicy and masculine. Something so uniquely him that I would know it anywhere. The feel of him. His skin. The shape of his hands, his mouth. The heat from his body and mouth.
I moaned as his teeth scraped my nipple. How did he know that I needed those little pinpricks of pain? That my body craved an intensity that gentle caresses couldn't give me.
A finger circled my entrance and I squirmed. He chuckled, the vibration moving down through my breast even as he slid his finger inside.
I moaned, but I needed more. My eyes opened and I reached over to clutch at Reed's shoulders.
“Please.” The word became a cry as a second finger joined the first. He curled them and my entire body went stiff.
Even while I was still in the midst of orgasm, I felt him shove his way inside me, stretching me, opening me. I wanted to scream, but it was as if all the air had been pushed from my lungs. The intensity of what I was feeling, physically, emotionally, it was almost too much.
Our bodies rocked against each other, friction and heat. My nails raked his back and his teeth worked over my skin. My world was narrowed down to our two bodies and where they were joined. He was mine and I was his, our hearts, minds and bodies made one. The rings didn't make it so. We'd been this way from the first moment we'd come together.
“Mine,” I whispered possessively in his ear.
“Yes,” he said. “Yours. And you are mine.”
“I am,” I agreed. I could feel another climax building. “Forever.”
My muscles began to tremble...
I jerked awake, my body flushed and shaking with the force of the dream. I'd woken just before coming, leaving me bereft and tense. For a moment, I thought that was what had woken me, my body not able to take a second orgasm and still stay asleep. Then I realized that wasn't it at all.
Someone was in my room.
My heart leaped into my throat as I saw the shadowed figure sitting on the edge of my bed. Reed had come back. He'd known how I felt, the feelings I'd refused to name or think about, and had come to me.
The light next to the bed suddenly switched on and I swallowed a scream.
“Tanek.” My voice came out more breathless than I wished it would have. I grabbed my blanket, pulling it up to my neck. I saw something flicker in his eyes and knew it had been the wrong move.
“You seemed to be enjoying your dream,” he said.
“You should not be in here.” I straightened, trying to regain my composure. My heart was pounding, the adrenaline racing through my system making me hyperaware of everything.
I'd scrubbed my skin nearly raw, but I could still feel every place he'd touched me. I hadn't wanted to look in the mirror this morning, but I'd forced myself, knowing I'd need to make sure I chose clothes that would cover the bruises. Tanek had either been lucky or he'd known what he was doing. He hadn't made a mark on my face and the ones on my neck were faint enough to be covered with make-up. The rest of me was another story.
I resisted the urge to pull my legs up. Aside from the fact that I didn't want Tanek to see another gesture made in response to him, I also knew it'd hurt enough to show on my face. He hadn't been satisfied to take me only once. I refused to think about the things he'd done to me, not knowing if I'd be able to maintain my composure if I remembered.
“I do not believe you should be telling me what I should or should not be doing.” Tanek's voice was low and threatening. “On Saturday, I will be your husband and I will do as I please.”
My temper began to rise, pushing through the fear and the hurt. Who the hell did he think he was? I'd agreed to marry my parents' choice because it was the right thing to do for Saja. I hadn't said anything to them today about what had happened, because I was still trying to figure out the best way to do it. Just going to the hospital and reporting an assault wasn't exactly an option for me.
“Get out of my room.” I spoke through gritted teeth. “And I want you out of my home.”
I expected anger, violence, outright refusal. What I didn't expect was laughter. A sharp, sardonic chuckle that managed to both piss me off and frighten me.
“I will leave your room...when I am ready.” He reached over and grabbed my wrist, squeezing until I winced. “And I will not be leaving this house. MY house. I will be king and Saja will be mine.”
He leaned closer and I could smell the alcohol on his breath. He wasn't drunk, but he wasn't entirely sober either.
“I will tell my parents what you did,” I threatened.
“No,” he said. “You will not, or I will tell them you were not a virgin when I took you.”
My eyes narrowed. “They will not believe you.”
“Don’t be so sure about that,” he said, his eyes cold. “But it doesn’t matter. You will never say a word about what happened to anyone. Remember, accidents happens. It wouldn’t surprise me if suddenly an accident happened that would leave me free to wed another. A real virgin.”
I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach. He wouldn't.
“Your sister, Halea, is a virgin, I am certain. For now.” He smiled. “I will spend the next two years teaching her how to please me, and then I will marry her. She will be queen in name until she gives me a son, and then she will join you.”
“Keep your fucking hands off of my sister!” I put as much venom into my voice as I could, but the words fell flat.
A sharp pain shot through me as I felt his strong fingers dig deep into the skin of my arm. He hissed in my face. “Then you better do everything I fucking ask of you. Pretend all you must, but you will obey me, bare my children…my son, our future king. It’s you or Halea. Your choice.”
He would do it, I knew. He would kill me, rape Halea, force her to marry him and most likely kill her too. I'd seen it in his eyes. He was capable of anything.
Before, I'd chosen to marry him to protect Halea from our parents forcing her onto the throne. Now, I knew I had to choose Tanek to save not only my life, but my sister's.
Chapter 16
Reed
I should've left Saja right after Nami had rejected me...again. The entire island was buzzing about the wedding. Even staying in my hotel room didn't keep me safe. The staff was cheery and constantly asking if I'd heard the wonderful news. Looking out the window was just as bad. The entire capitol was getting ready. There were flowers and streamers and all sorts of other things I might've found interesting if they hadn't meant the woman I loved was about to marry someone else.
Maybe that was why I'd stayed. To punish myself for what I'd done. For what I'd failed to do.
I ran my hand through my hair. I'd spent Friday pacing and trying to avoid the view while smiling politely at the people who brought my room service. I hadn't slept at all Thursday night, and last night hadn't been much better. Now, it was just after dawn and I didn't know what to do.
There would've been flights yesterday. Not many since it wasn't a big airport, but enough to get me out, especially if I hadn't cared where I was going. But I hadn't gone yesterday. Even though today was a Saturday and most airports ran on Saturday, today was a holiday of sorts. Nothing was open. Even the hotel had informed me that, during the wedding, no services would be available.
The palace was huge, but not big enough to support all of Saja's citizens, so the whole thing would be broadcast on Saja's only local station.
I wasn't planning on watching it. Or, at least, not on TV. I'd had a very bad idea that had woken me before the sun had come up, and I was currently arguing with myself about it.
I should go home. Back to Philly with my tail between my legs. My parents would be more than happy to let me take over again, no matter how I'd left things. The last time I'd seen Piper and Julien, it had been a bit awkward, but I'd gotten the impression that they wouldn't have been against a real friendship. And no matter what Piper had told me, I knew she'd understand why I'd given up. I could pursue Nami to the ends of the earth, but if s
he didn't want me, there wasn't anything I could do about it.
The thing was, I still didn't entirely believe that she honestly wanted Tanek. Something had happened after I left her. Something had changed that had made her choose to not believe in me. I didn't know what it was, but a part of me still didn't believe it. And I was pretty sure I wasn't going to believe it until I saw that ring on her finger...maybe not even then.
That was why I had to go. I couldn't just sit in my room and watch it on television. I had to actually be present, in the room, hear her say her vows. I needed to know that she was going to follow through, that she had gotten the life she wanted. I had to see that she didn't hesitate during any part of the ceremony, see that she meant what she said.
It would be painful. Awful. One of the worst things in the world to watch, especially if she went through with it. It would take all of my willpower to stay silent if they went with the traditional question about anyone speaking up if they knew why a couple shouldn't be married. I was also pretty sure that I'd get in some serious trouble if any of the royal family, the bodyguards or the fucking fiancé saw me.
But I had to go.
I knew it deep down in my gut, and I'd known it all day yesterday. If she was going to stop the wedding, I had to be there to stand with her when she did it. If she went through with it, I had to be there to see it happen so I could move on. I still wasn't entirely sure how I would manage to do that, but I figured I should probably take things one step at a time. After all, I was about to do something so stupid it could land me in Saja's only jail if I was caught.
My plan was pretty simple. I already knew where the service entrance was and I also knew rich people. They didn't really look at the help. I didn't have anything that could let me pass for kitchen staff or something like that, but I did have a tux that I could wear and pretend to be one of the staff hired for inside the house. Most of the time, it wasn't about the clothes anyway. It was the attitude.
A couple hours later and I was standing inside the ballroom of the Saja palace. I'd gone through the open service gate with a huge vase of flowers, then spent the rest of the time before the wedding letting myself be ordered around by some high-strung woman in a serious-looking peach business suit. I'd waited until the last possible minute and managed to slip into the back of the room. Huge statues stood around the edges of the room and I tucked myself into the shadows. I knew I'd be practically invisible now, and that was what I wanted.
The bridesmaids came first. I recognized the girl I'd seen that night, the one I knew had to be Halea. The girl Nami was sacrificing her own happiness for. I had to admit, when I looked at that sweet, innocent face, I couldn't blame her. I didn't even know the girl and I wanted to protect her.
I turned with the rest of the crowd to watch as Nami walked in. Her dress was simple and elegant. White silk fitted to complement not only her coloring, but her figure as well. There was no veil or elaborate train, and the dress itself was relatively unadorned. I wasn't really paying much attention to the dress, however. I was too busy watching her face.
She was staring straight ahead, eyes fixed on her destination. While she was smiling, I could tell it was fake. She didn't look at her fiancé the entire way and, as I glanced towards Tanek, I saw that he wasn't looking at Nami either. He might've been turned in that general direction, but he wasn't watching her.
I didn't understand how they could do this. It was clear that neither one of them loved the other. Hell, they barely knew each other. How could Nami agree to marry this guy? Him, I got. Nami was rich and would be the queen someday. By marrying her, he'd be king and his kids would get to rule Saja one day. And if what Nami had said was true, he could fool around as much as he wanted because his bastards wouldn't have a claim on the throne. Nami's line was the one that mattered. So long as he got her pregnant, it wouldn't matter who else he knocked up.
My hands clenched at my sides. I didn't want to think about Nami conceiving a child with him, with anyone besides me. The realization hit me hard enough that I physically felt it. It wasn't that I just didn't want her to sleep with him. Yes, I hated the thought of him touching her, kissing her, being inside her, but it was more than that. I could picture her in my mind's eye, her stomach swollen with a child, and I knew that I wanted it to be my child.
I'd never really thought about kids before, not in any real sense. With Britni, we'd been expected to have a child, but I'd never imagined it, and certainly had never pictured Britni pregnant. I'd always wanted kids, but the idea had been far off, in a distant future, no matter how the years had passed. I hadn't even thought about them with Piper. Even though I'd insisted that I was in love with her, I'd never once imagined a future beyond a wedding. I hadn't considered what it would be like to grow old with her, what kind of mother she would've been. I knew she'd be a good one and when I thought of her and Julien having a child, I liked the picture I saw in my head.
I didn't want just a few more days or months with Nami. I wanted forever and everything that came with it. I wanted the strange food cravings and being yelled at in the delivery room. I wanted late night feedings and irritability from lack of sleep. I wanted the terrible two's and teenage rebellion. I wanted all of that as long as she was at my side. Dark curls streaked with silver. Aching bones and fading eyesight. All of the things that came with old age, they didn't scare me when I thought of going through them with her.
Her voice drew me back to the present. She was reciting her vows, repeating words similar to the ones I'd said not too long ago. I supposed it was hypocritical of me to question her choice, or to assume that her fiancé was only after the power and money. Hadn't I been there, marrying a woman I didn't love because it was what my parents expected of me? How could I fault either of them when I'd made the same choice? I would have regretted it now if it hadn't been for the fact that, had I not married Britni, Piper never would have chosen Julien and I wouldn't have left Philadelphia in the first place, which meant I never would've met Nami.
I had sometimes wondered if I hadn't married Britni, if Piper and I would have lasted. I knew we would've at least been together for a while because we'd had a true physical attraction to each other and had enjoyed spending time together. What I didn't know was if it would've led to a life in happiness or if she would've come to the same conclusion, that we really didn't love each other, not in the way we needed to.
As Nami and her fiancé joined hands, my heart twisted. It was almost over and Nami hadn't stopped it.
Had it been this way for Piper, I wondered. Had she felt sick to her stomach? Like her heart was being ripped from her chest? Like she couldn't get enough air into her lungs? I'd thought a lot about my wedding day over the short time Britni and I had been married. I'd thought about what would've happened if I'd stopped the ceremony, told Britni that I couldn't do it. If I'd walked down the aisle and claimed Piper right then. I'd never once tried to imagine what she must've been going through during the ceremony.
Was there a difference though? She'd said herself that we weren't truly in love. What I felt for Nami was real. I knew it in every fiber of my being, every cell. I'd never believed in soulmates or true love, even with Piper. Nami made me question everything I'd ever known. I wasn't whole without her. She was the one. The only one.
I missed the pronouncement, but looked up just in time to see Tanek kiss her. It was a fairly chaste kiss, but I could see the possessiveness even from where I stood. Tanek was making it clear to everyone present that Nami was his.
I leaned against the wall as the couple were presented to their people. I no longer trusted my legs to hold me. The pair walked down the aisle, Nami's arm looped through Tanek's, their stride evenly matched, as if they moved in perfect sync. Neither of them looked at anyone in the crowd and I was glad. I didn't want Nami to see me, and more than that, I didn't want to see her face, meet her eyes. I didn't think I could bear it if I saw her look at me with pity.
The wedding was over and the reception would be
gin shortly, so I knew I needed to leave. I forced my legs under me and began to walk out the way I'd come. I wasn't nearly as careful, but I wasn't seen. I wouldn't have cared if I had been spotted. Nothing mattered anymore. It was over.
Chapter 17
Nami
I wasn't entirely sure what I was expecting from my wedding day, but I did know that, as a child, when I'd pictured getting married, I'd always thought I would at least be happy. I'd always known that I wouldn't be allowed to choose my spouse, but when I was young, I'd dreamed that the man my parents chose would still, somehow, be the man of my dreams. He'd be worthy of the title prince, and later, king. A fairy tale in which the couple has a happily ever after.
Of course, as I'd gotten older, I'd realized that those kinds of things didn't exist. Still, I'd hoped for a marriage like my parents at the very least. Theirs had been arranged, but I knew they cared for each other. I didn't know how deep that ran or what kind of love they had for each other, but I knew they had been faithful and I'd seen them share affection. If I could not marry the man of my choosing, at least I could take comfort in the fact that my parents had married the same way and had spent the last thirty years in a good marriage.
Not once had I considered the nightmare to come. Saja had a low crime rate and laws that quickly and harshly punished violent offenders. Domestic violence and child abuse were treated the same as any other violent crime. We had always prided ourselves on how safe our country was, for visitors as well as citizens. Even if I hadn't been a princess, I wouldn't have ever thought my future husband capable of hurting me. As princess, the idea had been ludicrous, unthinkable.
And yet, I'd had to carefully apply make-up on my arms and neck to cover the fading bruises. Even as I walked down the aisle towards Tanek, I experienced twinges of pain from his assault. It wasn't so bad that I let it show. Aside from not wanting anyone present to know how he'd hurt me, I refused to give Tanek the satisfaction of knowing I still felt it.