The line went completely quiet. The typing ceased, and he didn’t even hear her breathing anymore until she spoke again. “I . . . I wasn’t gonna cancel.” Her tone had changed. She sounded a little surprised, stunned maybe. Abel waited, praying he hadn’t blown it. “I was just gonna ask for the exact itinerary. What day and time were you planning on driving out?”
Pulling the phone away from him a little so she wouldn’t hear the enormous breath of relief he took then exhaled, Abel smiled. He told her what day he wanted to leave, and they went through the motions of deciding what time was best for both of them. Neither mentioned his unexpected declaration, but it was out there, and even though he immediately regretted letting it out that way, he was now glad that he had. Maybe she’d remember that the next time she saw another one of those stupid tabloid photos of him and Rachel.
Nellie had already yawned a couple of times, and she had mentioned she’d be up early the next day, so Abel was getting ready to let her go, but not before he made sure he told her what he’d really called to say. “I miss you, Nell.”
Like earlier, she was quiet for moment then cleared her throat. “I miss you too,” she whispered.
Neither said anything for a few silent moments, and even as exhausted as he was, if she’d only uttered the words that she wished she could see him, he’d be in his car before she finished her sentence. But she didn’t. Instead she said goodnight, and just like that the call was over.
Abel lay there in his bed, staring at the dark ceiling, thinking. He wanted so badly to believe that she was feeling what he was. But there was no denying her words. It wasn’t just a mistaken assumption or even her lying. She’d told him herself that serious relationships were not on her agenda. She wanted to be free. Then he saw it with his own eyes.
Punching his mattress, he shook his head in an effort to shake the visual of her kissing her date away. One thing was for damn sure: he’d never admit it out loud, but Noah was right. He was either going to have to suck it up or end this thing because there was no way he was going to be able to deal with that. The very idea that he could get used to it with time as he’d tried to insinuate was insane. He’d never get used to that. His reaction to seeing her kiss Sam would be exactly the same if he ever saw it again. It made no sense to even try to pretend he’d hold back, because just lying there thinking about it made him feel like kicking someone’s ass.
That meant he had an even bigger problem now. Even if he did end things as Noah suggested, it still wouldn’t change the way he felt. His reaction to seeing her with someone else, as inevitable as that was, would still be ugly. What Noah and Roni had been so worried about would happen. It hit him just then. It had already happened. If Noah ever had a gathering where Abel was warned upfront that Nellie would be there with someone else, he wouldn’t show up. There had to be another alternative than the only two Noah thought would work. Ending things with Nellie would effectively mean ending any social gatherings with one of his best friends. He didn’t even want to consider that, but there’d be no way—no way—his being around Nellie and another man would ever work.
~*~
The long day at the zoo with her nephew, her parents, Roni, and little Jack had worn Nellie out. She hadn’t even realized how long it’d been since she spent that much quality time with her parents or her best friend. Most notably, she hadn’t realized how much she needed to take a break from her busy life and tormented heart. It’d been nice to just relax and think of nothing more than having some good family fun.
She’d been closer to Roni than she’d ever been to her own sister, so she and Jack were just as much family to her as her parents. Nellie wasn’t even ashamed to admit she loved Roni more than she did her sister. It was natural. Roni’s love for Nellie had always been so selfless—the girl would do anything for Nellie, and betray her? Never. Nellie could tell that Roni still felt terrible about making her feel bad the night she’d told her she’d meant to rub it in to Abel’s brother that she’d been on a date. Ever since then, Roni had hardly asked about Abel.
The drive home from the zoo was a quiet one except for when Gus got fussy. “He’s tired,” her mom explained as he squirmed in his car seat next to her, whining.
Nellie handed Roni her phone. “Find the app on my second screen that looks like a big bouncing ball. He likes playing with that one.” She turned back to Gus as she reached the stop light. “You wanna play with auntie’s phone, Gus?”
Immediately, he reached his hand out. “Fom!”
She smiled as Roni turned around and handed it to him. “Here you go.”
Glancing up in her rearview mirror, she could see that, unlike Gus, Jack wasn’t the only one who’d dozed off; so had her dad. Her mom’s eyes were beginning to droop as well. She frowned, feeling terrible that she’d been so busy that she’d hardly been able to help them with Gus.
“So Logan just disappeared?” Roni asked as she straightened back out in her seat.
“Yeah,” Nellie nodded as the light turned green. “I didn’t hear from him for a few days, which was weird because he was supposed to be doing the financials for the mixer and from day one he was all about communication, constantly calling and texting.”
“I remember you saying he was kind of pushy even.”
“Exactly,” Nellie could admit it now. He was on the pushy side. “Then suddenly he emails me that he’d finished the work he was supposed to be doing and said he’d gotten an offer out of state and couldn’t pass it up.” She shrugged. “When I interviewed him initially, he did say he’d been in a real financial bind for months. So I guess if he got offered something permanent and with more pay, I can see why he’d just up and leave, but now I’m stuck doing it all alone, and this is a huge project. I’ve been up to my eyeballs with it.”
Roni frowned, shaking her head. “Well, that sucks. Is it too late to get a replacement?”
“No, I’ve actually interviewed a few more people that the temp agency sent over. I think I finally interviewed one that’ll do. She’s a retired accountant looking for some temporary work and seems to be real good about what she does.”
The monitor on her dash went off, announcing an incoming call. The screen flashed Sam’s name and Roni smiled. Nellie was too tired and wasn’t about to have a public conversation with him anyhow since her phone was hooked up to her speakers. She’d ignored his earlier calls and was about to do the same when the ignore button on the screen disappeared and now read: Connected to Sam.
Glancing back at her nephew, she figured out the culprit immediately. Even though he too was now dozing off, his little fingers were still hitting the screen on her phone.
“Nellie?” Sam voice came over the speakers.
Roni turned around and took the phone out of Gus’s hands, muffling her giggles with her other hand.
“Hi, Sam,” she said, scrunching her nose, but one look in her rearview mirror and she could see his voice hadn’t woken anyone.
“I’ve been trying to get a hold of you all day. I’m in town and was hoping we could get together.”
“Oh . . . Yeah, I spent the day at the zoo with my family. I’m on my way home now, but I’m exhausted. I think I’m gonna have to pass.”
“You sure?” he asked, sounding very disappointed. “After tonight, I’m going back home again. I was really hoping to see you, even if it’s just a few minutes. Any chance we can do just coffee maybe, or if you’re in the mood to just relax, the hotel I’m staying at is on a private beach. I’ve stayed there before. The sunset is beautiful. We can chill on the beach, watch the sunset, maybe have a little wine, and then I can take you home.”
Nellie thought of Abel’s call last night. I need you there with me. I miss you, Nell. As much as she wanted to put more weight on those statements, she’d seen the photos of him and the girl at the gym. Her mind had been made up a week ago that this understanding with Abel was not going to work. Then she got that one text from him with those three simple words, and that was all it t
ook to have her rethinking things. After seeing more photos of him and Rachel spending time together, she’d gone back to her original thoughts, and then he called her last night.
She had to stop letting a few words from him melt her so completely that she’d be willing to overlook the obvious. He wasn’t spending every waking moment working out as he made it sound. He was enjoying his downtime with the touchy-feely little fitness model—someone he had an intimate past with and very likely a present one too. And from what Nellie could tell, he was enjoying it. This entire time she’d been away from him, she’d forced herself to look at the photos, and every day there were new ones. Even today, the day after what felt like a genuinely heartfelt call, there’d been new ones of the two of them spending more time together than she had with him in over a week.
Glancing at Roni, who zipped her lips like a good girl but lifted a very telling brow, she smirked. She knew what Roni must be thinking. Since Abel had gone into workout lockdown, she’d only left her place to work. After taking the entire day off today, she’d be back in the office working long hours to try to get the mixer completely coordinated before she’d have to leave for Vegas. Her social life was on hold again for more than one reason. “Actually, Sam, that sounds nice. It’d be a perfect way to end the only day I’ve had off in over a week.”
“Excellent. Text me when you’re ready for me to pick you up, and I’ll be there.”
Roni smiled when the call ended. “I’m glad you’re going. I’ll admit I was a little worried when you went out with him the first time. I thought for sure Abel seemed upset the night Sam dropped you off, but it’s not fair that Abel gets to date and you stay home, faithfully waiting for his visits. But that’s all I’m gonna say about it.” She zipped her lips again and smiled. “I promise.”
Glad that Roni kept her promise and didn’t say much more, Nellie didn’t comment any further either. She still wasn’t feeling entirely sure that this was a good idea, but her heart needed to start moving on. It felt so impossibly stuck where it was now. Maybe going out and trying to enjoy another man’s company would start to dislodge it. At the very least, it could do what her first date with Sam had managed to do: make her feel attractive in more than just a sexual way.
***
Less than fifteen minutes into her visit with Sam, Nellie was beginning to regret it. For starters, when he’d mentioned the private beach they’d be watching the sunset from, she’d foolishly assumed they’d walk out the back of his lavish hotel through the lobby. Instead they’d gone straight to his room. He explained that his beach-front room had a private patio, which led out into a walkway if she wanted to get closer to the water. But they’d spent some time in his room as he poured them each a glass of chilled wine.
Sam had also taken it upon himself to hold her hand the whole way to their room and again when walking her out onto his patio. It had its own private fire pit and its own private pool and Jacuzzi. Sam turned the fire on as soon as they walked out. The ocean breeze was just picking up, so the warmth of the fire felt perfect. It was a very romantic setting and one she would’ve definitely enjoyed—with someone else.
Even with her reservations and knowing there’d be only one very specific someone she’d prefer doing this with, Nellie forced herself to enjoy the time but casually reminded Sam that she couldn’t stay long. She’d have a glass or two at most and then she had to head out. The sun was just setting as they sat down on one of the plush patio sofas. She had to admit it was breathtaking.
“This is my favorite hotel to stay at when I’m out here in California,” Sam said, staring at the sunset.
He’d sat next to her a bit too closely, but Nellie refrained from moving over, allowing their thighs to touch.
“I request this room specifically because of this patio. I only wish you had more time to help me enjoy it. We could take a dip in the pool. It’s heated.”
“You always travel alone?” she asked curiously.
Surely a man who looked as good as Sam could find someone else to help him enjoy this room. His eyes alone were really something else. And now seeing him in jeans and t-shirt, she could see she’d been right about his physique the first time she met him. He wasn’t nearly as muscular as Abel, but his arms and chest were more than impressive.
“For the most part,” he said, sipping his wine glass, “if it’s business, I usually do. For pleasure trips, I get together with friends and family. But there are exceptions like next week, for example. I’ll be in Vegas partly for business and partly for pleasure, so I’ll be meeting with friends.”
“Really?” She tilted her head, smiling about the coincidence. “I’ll be in Vegas next week too. What kind of business are you doing out there?”
There was a noticeable gleam in his eye that she wasn’t sure what to make of, but then he smiled big. “The cable channel I work at used to be just local, but they were recently bought out by a subsidiary of CNN, so my role as a commentator has branched out a bit. I’m now covering stories all over, not just the Detroit area. This is why I’m here now and why I’ll be in Vegas next week. Will you be out there just for pleasure?” he asked, eyeing her playfully.
She smiled, feeling a bittersweet emotion wash over her. A few weeks ago she might’ve said both. How fast things had changed. While she knew all too well that Vegas could be as pleasurable as her times with Abel had always been, ever since the morning she first saw the photos, Nellie knew she was in danger of serious damage to her heart if she continued with their arrangement as is. “Business,” she sipped her wine. It went down a bit rougher than she expected.
“Maybe we can get together while you’re out there. How long will you be there?”
She was about to explain about the fight and her role in it when his phone rang and he frowned, glancing at the screen. “I’m sorry. This is so rude,” he said apologetically, “but I have to take this. Will you give me a few minutes?”
“Take your time,” she assured him as he stood up and began walking back into the room.
Her own phone had lit up a few times since she’d been there, so she decided to check it. She had a missed call from her mother and a text from Logan. The text caught her attention. She hadn’t heard from him since his email informing her he was resigning. He hadn’t once bothered to return her calls, and she’d left him a voicemail over a week ago, asking him to please call her. His departure had been so abrupt, and even though he’d fulfilled the last tasks he’d been asked to do, she still had questions on a few things. She clicked on the little envelope now curiously.
Give me a call when you get a chance, please. I need to talk to you.
The irritation was immediate, especially after she read it a second time to make sure she hadn’t misread it. The nerve of him! Now he wanted her to call him? First, he just up and left her hanging, knowing how much work this mixer was, then he didn’t bother to return her calls, even when she mentioned she needed some things clarified. Did he need a letter of recommendation now or something?
Nellie closed out her texts, rolling her eyes. Well, now he’d wait until she felt good and ready to call him. That could be never. The jerk!
Sam walked out into the patio again, glancing around and up at the palm trees that surrounded the patio. He then turned and studied the building adjacent to his hotel. “Everything okay?” she asked.
He turned back to her with an instant smile. “Fine,” he waved his phone at her. “Work. Always something.” He put his phone down on the patio table and reached out his hand. “C’mere, I wanna show you something else about this room.”
Glancing back at the patio door, Nellie hesitated to take his hand. She could only hope he wasn’t taking her agreement to come back to his room with him to mean more than it was. He must’ve picked up on what she might be thinking because he motioned out toward the walkway that led around the palm trees. “It’s not in the room,” he laughed softly, confirming he had picked up on what had crossed her mind. “It’s out there.”
>
Feeling silly but very relieved, she smiled, taking his hand as she stood up. They strolled along the small walkway around the trees, and then they were on the sand. It was a wide open beach area but still very vacant.
“This beach is exclusive to the hotel. And my room is literally steps away from it. I’ve stayed at lot of rooms all over the country, but this is by far my favorite.” He smiled, and his incredibly light eyes nearly twinkled. “It’s a little pricey but worth every penny, I think.”
“Yes,” Nellie had to agree. “It’s beautiful.”
She was caught in his eyes for a moment, and he smiled, pulling her gently to him.
“Nellie, I know I told you this earlier this week on the phone, and I didn’t miss how quiet it made you. I hope this doesn’t freak you out, considering we’ve only known each other for a few weeks. But ever since that day I spent with you, I really haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I know you said you’re still working on getting over your divorce, and I respect that. It took me some time to get over mine. At the risk of sounding a little pushy, would you please just give something between you and me some consideration?” He held up his hand. “Whenever you’re ready, that is. I’ll be patient. I just wanna put it out there so that we’re clear that it’s what I’m hoping for here.”
If she hadn’t been so caught up checking the photos of Abel and Rachel the day of their brunch, it might’ve been a very pleasant date. Sam was actually very sweet, attentive, and she’d since established very good-looking. And ever since their brunch, not a day had gone by that he hadn’t called or texted her. They’d even had a couple nights where they’d chatted online late into the night.
This past week, she’d come to the conclusion that Roni had been right—as usual. She wasn’t the fuck-buddy type. She’d fallen for Abel so fast and so hard that she’d like to say that was the only reason why the arrangement that they had hadn’t worked out. But she was certain now she’d never be okay dating someone who was also seeing someone else. It was a constant reminder of her inability to be enough for any man. For that reason, she was hesitant to become involved with another good-looking, obviously wealthy guy who did so much traveling.