Coop said.
I sucked in a deep breath of cool night air. “Nah.”
“Then why were you sweating inside the camper with the heat off? Midfifties inside. Low forties out here.”
“If you’re cold, I can go back in and grab your jacket,” I said.
“Very funny, Meatloaf. You know I’m right. Let’s go for a nocturnal talk.”
I had to smile at this. It had been more than a year since he and I had gone for a nocturnal talk, something we had done almost every night of our lives when we were kids.
“I’m not claustrophobic,” I said. “Kate took care of that in the Deep.”
“Not entirely. But you are a lot better. If this was a couple of years ago you would have kicked a window out of the camper and tried to squeeze through the opening.”
Coop was right, of course. My claustrophobia hadn’t been cured. I hadn’t recognized it because it had come on so slowly.
We were parked in an area called the Devil’s Kitchen.
We passed a big motor home, two campers, a trailer, and a tent. All of them were spaced two or three campsites apart. All of them were dark. The Pod? If they were, the ghosts were sleeping.
The wind had died down.
A damp salty haze hung in the air.
I could hear the ocean.
“Have you been to this part of the coast before?”
“I’m sure I have, but I don’t remember it. I spent only a couple of nights sleeping outside.”
“How did you get by?”
“Pocket change. I relied on the kindness of strangers. I stayed in people’s houses if they were locals. If I got picked up by a tourist, they usually let me crash in their hotel room.”
“Did you work?”
“A little. I mowed a couple of lawns. Washed some restaurant dishes. My longest period of employment was teaching a kid to tap-dance in Los Angeles. He was trying out for a part in a movie. Couldn’t tap a lick when we started, but he wasn’t bad after a couple of weeks. He got the part. His parents were grateful.”
“How old was he?”
“Seven. His mom caught me tapping under an overpass in Hollywood. She and her husband were both in the film business. I’m still not sure what they did. But they had a lot of friends. Parties every weekend at their house. I was staying with them. That’s where I met the makeup guy who gave me the overhaul before I got to Portland.”
We came to a weatherworn sign that read BEACH.
The tide was out.
The breakers glowed in the distance with bioluminescence.
We stepped onto the beach and walked toward the white rolling waves, keeping our shoes on as a barrier against the cold.
“Do you trust Alex?” Coop asked.
“Sure. Don’t you?”
“Not really.”
This stopped me dead in the sand. I always thought Coop’s universal trust was one of the reasons everyone was attracted to him. He was completely nonjudgmental. He had walked a million miles in other people’s shoes, and all those shoes fit him perfectly.
“What do you mean? You trust everybody.”
Coop shook his head. “Just because I listen to people doesn’t mean that I trust them. Alex Dane is not telling us the truth, at least not the whole truth. He’s not quite right in the head.”
“That’s something you should be used to by now. Nobody from the Deep is right in the head. Alex is an old man who has lived by himself underneath a library for years. Of course he’s not right in the head.”
“It’s more than that,” Coop said. “He’s lying to us about something.”
“Then he’s a pretty good liar.”
“Of course he is. He’s from the Deep, an Original. We need to keep that in mind. He’s one of them, or was for years, until he and Lod had their falling-out.”
“Over Kate’s parents being murdered in that alley and thrown into a Dumpster.”
“We’ll see,” Coop said quietly.
“Do you know something that I don’t know?”
“No, Meatloaf. Cross my heart. It’s just a feeling I have. I’m not hiding anything from you.”
“Do you think we should take off?”
Coop shook his head. “He’s our only chance of catching up with Kate.”
“We can always call Tia Ryan at the FBI.”
“That’s the one thing I think Alex is telling the truth about. Whatever Lod has in mind is already in the works. If the FBI swoops in and picks everyone up, his master plan will continue. If Alex is right about no one knowing what the plan is they won’t be able to tell the FBI anything.”
“But Lod knows the plan. If they caught him I’m sure —”
“You think Lawrence Oliver Dane is going to tell them anything after waiting so long to make his move?”
“I’m sure they have ways of making people talk.”
“Lod knows that. Remember? He has a plan for every contingency. The only thing he doesn’t have a plan for is us, because he doesn’t know we’re here.”
I didn’t even want to think about what Lod would do if he discovered that we were following him.
“We’ll just keep heading south,” Coop said. “We’ll stick with Alex for the time being.” He picked up a perfect sand dollar and turned his flashlight on to look at it. “One more thing, and I know you aren’t going to like it. But I have to give you the option.”
“What?”
“You don’t have to stick around for any of this. I’m sure between us we have enough money to get you back to McLean or anywhere else you want to go.”
“You’re kidding, right?”
“I am not kidding.” He sailed the sand dollar back into the ocean. “I’m worried this is not going to end well. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“This is all about the tunnel, isn’t it?”
A few years earlier, I had helped Coop dig a tunnel through our neighborhood back home. The tunnel had exploded and collapsed. That’s where I’d gotten my claustrophobia. Coop had saved my life.
“A little,” Coop admitted. “I still feel bad about it.”
“You can forget the tunnel. And you can forget about me not sticking this thing out. I’m here until the very end, no matter what. And if I leave, who’s going to drive? How do you think Alex would do behind the wheel of that truck?”
“You’re sure?”
“I am sure,” I said. “And I’m exhausted. I need to get some sleep so I can drive tomorrow. Let’s head back.”
“I’m wide-awake,” Coop said. “I think I’ll wander around for a while.”
“Big surprise. I’ll see you later.”
When I got back to our campsite I didn’t have the desire … well, the courage … to go back inside the cramped camper. Coop was right about the claustrophobia. He was probably right about Alex too. I got a sleeping bag and pad out from behind the front seat. I was going to roll them out on the ground, but then I saw the boat attached to the back of the camper and thought that might be a better option. I lay down between the two bench seats. It smelled like dead fish, but I didn’t care. I closed my eyes and thought about Kate. As strange and dangerous as our situation was, her situation had to be worse and even more dangerous.
both of them.
When we had gotten back to Bella and Bill’s motor home, we’d talked quietly for a few minutes about Lod. We were relieved that we might have pulled it off, but we all knew Lod well enough to know that he might just be letting us think that we had pulled it off. I had seen him watch people lie to him for weeks; then, when they least expected it, he’d call them on every lie they had told him, then send them to the mush room, never to be seen again.
Bella and Bill were in the small bed above the cab. I was lying on the sofa next to the little kitchen. The ankle bracelet itched. The snoring was loud. I didn’t need the tether. If they kept me up all night with their snoring, I’d barely be able to keep my eyes open tomorrow, much less run away.
I got up, quietly opened the d
oor, and stepped outside into a fog so thick I couldn’t see ten feet in front of me. I sat down on top of a picnic table with my feet on the bench. There was a camp restroom across the road. I was certain it was less than two hundred feet away. I thought about wandering over and leaving a note, then berated myself for being stupid.
The notes had been an impossible long shot. If by some miracle Alex, Coop, and Pat had found any of them and managed to track us, Lod would have caught them by now. He would not have tethered them. He would have killed them. And it would have been my fault.
I should have guessed how tight his security would be. Leaving the notes had been an unnecessary risk. If Bella or Bill had discovered even one of them I’d be at the bottom of the ocean, or buried at the base of a Douglas fir.
I shook my head in disgust. I was a Shadow. I needed to harden myself. I needed to get my head back in the game. But what was the game now? Why was I here? Why had Alex sent me after Bella and Bill? The train station had obviously been their last stop. If I hadn’t pursued them, I could have joined Coop and Pat at the library and disappeared. Forever.
I tried to think back to what Alex had said to me outside the station. His exact words. I closed my eyes and concentrated.
He had appeared out of nowhere, just like he had in the Deep. One moment the snowy sidewalk ahead of me was empty, the next moment he was standing in front of me, blocking my way.
“Where are Coop and Pat?”
“I’m meeting them at a place called Voodoo Doughnuts. Bella and Bill are in the —”
“I know,” he interrupted. “They’re still inside the station. We’ve been compromised. Larry hacked us in Chicago. Give me your phone and computer.”
I had pulled them out of my pack and handed them over without question.
“What are you doing here? How did you find —”
“No time. Coop was on the last train. The snow has stopped all the other trains. Bella and Bill will be coming out any second. I want you to follow them. Find out where they go. I’ll take Coop and Pat to the Multnomah County Library. Main branch. It’s on Southwest Tenth, between Yamhill and Taylor. Got that?”
“Yes.”
“Here they come.”
I turned around. Bill was wheeling Bella out of the station, having a difficult time negotiating the snow. When I turned back around, Alex was gone. Poof! Just like he’d always disappeared in the Deep. Bill pushed Bella to a small parking lot across from the station. I hurried over, squatted behind a car, and heard everything they said as they put the wheelchair into the back of the motor home.
I didn’t think Alex had meant for me to follow them all the way to the coast. That was all my doing. If the bus station across the street hadn’t had a bus leaving for the coast right then … If there hadn’t been a kid willing to sell me his ticket. If I hadn’t met the girl from Manzanita. If her hotel hadn’t had bicycles. If, if, if. But the biggest if was me. If I hadn’t wanted to follow them, I’d be in Portland with Coop …
I was no different than the tracker dogs I had trained in the Deep. I had picked up Bella and Bill’s scent, and I wasn’t going to give up until I found out where they were going and what they planned to do.
My fault.
My training.
And maybe something else. Maybe I wanted to find my grandfather. Maybe I wanted to find out why he had killed my parents. Maybe I wanted to kill him.
“What are you doing here?”
A giant appeared out of the fog. If he hadn’t spoken, I might have thought it was a bear standing on two feet.
“That’s none of your business,” I said. “And keep your voice down. People are sleeping.”
“I can hear them.” He stepped closer. It was Carl. “Bella and Bill always sleep away from everyone else so they don’t wake people.” He gave a small laugh, which sounded more like he was choking.
He had cut his bushy beard and trimmed his hair. There was nothing he could do about his height. He had to be six six. He sat down on the bench near my feet and was still taller than I was sitting on the table.
“What are you doing here?” he repeated.
“Couldn’t sleep. Getting some fresh air.”
“I meant, why did you come after us?”
I looked at his profile. The lack of facial hair hadn’t improved his appearance.
“That’s none of your business. But, just to clarify, I am part of the us you’re referring to.”
“You always did have a smart mouth.”
He was right about that, but I had no idea how he knew this. I had seen him only a dozen times in my life and had spoken to him maybe twice.
“What are you doing out here?” I asked.
“Doing what I do. Watching.”
“Fabulous. Why don’t you go off and watch. I don’t need watching. And I don’t want company.”
“You shot my dog.”
“I did not shoot your dog. The old man shot your dog after you threatened to have your dog tear us apart.”
He coughed out another laugh. “The old man. Alex Dane. I didn’t even know Lod had a brother.”
I didn’t know it either at the time, but I wasn’t about to share that with Carl.
“The dog wouldn’t have hurt you,” he continued. “I sent him after the boys. What are those boys to you anyway?”
I was tired, a little cold, but alert enough to realize that Carl had not just been wandering by when I stepped out of the coach. He’d been waiting for me, hoping I would step outside so he could have a little chat with me. A friendly chat, or his version of friendly. The question was, had Lod sent him, or was he here on his own and for his own reasons?
“Those boys are nothing to me,” I said. “Not anymore. I was just trying to get them up top. Sorry about the dog.”
I was sorry about his dog, but there had been no choice.
“I miss that dog,” he said.
“I bet.” I missed my dogs too. I planned on getting another one as soon as I could, which brought up another question I hadn’t thought about. Many people in the Deep had a dog. Dogs and dog training had been an important part of our Community lives. People’s cleverness was often judged by the cleverness of their dogs.
“I haven’t seen any dogs here,” I said.
“No dogs allowed. Lod thought they would attract too much attention. We’d have to stop and let them out to do their business. He’s right about that. You have a dog, people come up to you.”
“Smart,” I said. And it was smart. Lod thought of everything, every detail.
“Your grandfather’s smart all right. How did your meeting go with him?”
Finally — the real reason for this chance encounter. Carl had dropped by to pump me for information. But on whose behalf? His own, or Lod’s?
“I’m alive,” I said. “So it went as well as could be expected. I don’t blame any of you for being suspicious of me. If I were in your place, I’d be suspicious too.”
“Heard he put you on a tether.”
“Two hundred feet.”
“Did he mention anything about your backpack?”
“What do you mean?”
“You know, what you were carrying in the backpack you had with you.”
This was the reason for his visit.
He had taken the cash.
He wanted to know if Lod knew.
I shrugged. “He searched it.”
“Was anything missing?”
I looked at him for a moment trying to decide how I was going to handle this.
“My money,” I said. “It wasn’t there, but I knew it wouldn’t be. It wasn’t there when Bella searched the pack earlier.”
“How much money?” Carl asked, almost in a whisper.
“I think you know, Carl. It was a lot of money.”
He stared at me. I tensed my legs, readying myself to jump off the table if he made a grab for me. He was a powerful man, but he didn’t look quick. All I had to do was get two hundred feet away from him and my tet
her alarm would sound. I lifted my pant leg and showed him my ankle bracelet.
“If you’re thinking about doing something, I’d think again. You can’t haul me very far away with this thing on my leg.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You took the money, Carl. And I don’t care. If I was concerned about it, I would have told Bella when I first discovered it was missing. I didn’t say anything to Lod either because I don’t want him to know about it. I’m in enough trouble with him as it is.”
“You didn’t tell him?”
I shook my head. “And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell him either. If you tell him, we’ll both be in trouble.”
Carl visibly relaxed. “I took it because —”
“Because you thought I’d be killed. Understandable. They would have buried the backpack with me, or tossed it into the ocean. Why throw away perfectly good cash? I would have done the same thing.”
This last part wasn’t true. I’d never thought about money before coming up top with Coop and Pat. In the Deep we didn’t really use money. We didn’t need it. If we wanted something, all we had to do was ask for it, and within a few days it would magically appear. There were restrictions, of course. Nothing electronic. No newspapers, magazines, banned books, alcohol, drugs, and a few other corrupting things. We did carry cash when we were up top in case we got stranded someplace and had to catch a cab, or jump on the subway. Dead presidents, as Lod called cash, were only to be used in case of emergency. He kept close track of what people spent, or had in their pockets. The rest of the cash was kept in the dead-presidents vault in his bedroom.
“Where did you get all that money?” Carl asked suspiciously.
“I’ve been collecting bills from Lod’s safe since I was a kid. Just something to do. Never thought I’d need it. I don’t need it now. I’m happy to be back, and I’d appreciate if you’d keep the dead presidents to yourself. You actually did me a favor when you swiped them.”
Carl scrutinized me carefully, looking for a lie. There were plenty of lies there, but he didn’t push me further.
“Okay, then,” Carl finally said. “We’re square.” He put his giant hand out for me to shake.
I shook it.
“Again, I’m sorry about your dog. You and your dog were just doing your job. I wish Alex hadn’t shot him. He didn’t deserve it.”