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  Chapter 4

  Tizzy’s enjoyable but hectic weekend ended a little quicker than what she had planned. Greg’s work finished a day earlier and he picked up the children on Sunday night instead of Monday morning. He said it would make it easier for him to get to work on Monday morning as well. With the kids gone, Tizzy did give going back to work a thought but then decided to take the morning off as originally planned and use that time to get the house back in order. That decision lasted until Becky rang and informed her that she was having a very bad time with her morning sickness and didn’t think that she make it to work. With Becky away, it meant that there would be no one in their section until the afternoon. Tizzy knew she could only do one thing and that was to go in.

  At 7.45 am on Monday morning Tizzy was seated at her desk with her coffee mug beside her as she worked through her e-mails. She printed the ones that needed action. Saved the important messages and deleted the rest. Then she quickly sent Grant a thank you note. It was short and polite. Nothing in it gave any indication of the turmoil that was within the writer. It read “Thank you for the beautiful flowers and the words. Tizzy.”

  Then she got back to work. At a quarter past nine, Roger walked in and detailed Becky’s horrid weekend. He also brought a folder from Becky.

  “Grant will collect this from you sometime this morning.” he said. Then he left after thanking her on behalf of Becky.

  As Tizzy put the folder in her in-tray, she heard a sound behind her. Presuming that Roger had returned she turned towards him, but it was not Roger who had walked in. It was Grant.

  Dressed in navy trousers and a pale blue business shirt, he had finished off the effect with a matching tie that complimented both items. He always looked incredibly handsome but for the first time, Tizzy was prepared to acknowledge it to herself. Tizzy had always admired Grant, the way he worked and the way he treated his staff. But it was her own reaction to him that she was suddenly more aware of now. The missing heartbeat and the nervous feeling in the stomach, it was all there. That bouquet of flowers had changed everything for her. ‘What is wrong with you?’ she admonished herself. ‘You are twenty-eight years old, not some silly teenager having her first crush. Steady yourself Tizzy, you are moving onto shaky grounds’ Despite her warning to herself, she was still not able to ignore her new awareness of him.

  “Here already? Becky said you were having the morning off to be with your kids.” he commented.

  “Becky rang and as Greg had taken the k..kids back last night, I thought I would come in.” she replied.

  “Um..Roger said he had left the Branson file with you. I am glad you came in early. With Becky away; I will need your help on the Branson project. Becky said you know all about it.” Grant was looking directly at her as he waited for her answer. He noticed that she either had not heard the stress he had put on the words ‘your kids’, or she was not going to clarify things for him. Then he wondered why he wanted clarification in the first place.

  “Yes, I am loooo..king at it no...ow.” her stutter was worse than ever. Her hands were shaking. ‘Oh hell Becky’, she thought, ‘I will never get through this day’.

  Grant continued to look at Tizzy, annoyed at this turn of events. Then noticing her nervousness, his eyes suddenly softened. So this was why Becky was so protective about her. He could see the tremor in her hands. At first he was going to leave Tizzy to deal with Peter Branson. Peter was a good client but he could be a bit curt and abrupt. Becky had strongly objected and had asked him to conduct the meeting himself. Now he was glad he had agreed.

  “Look, I know you hate meeting people so I’ll speak to Branson, but I do want you to be there beside me just in case he has any questions. Let me have a quick look at the notes and then we’ll take the stuff over to my desk. Branson is already there so we don’t have much time.” Grant continued looking at the papers, hoping that would ease her nervousness.

  Tizzy heart began pounding. She knew this sensation well. The difficulty in breathing, the feeling of nausea, the perspiration on her face and claustrophobia! Her doctor called it a panic attack. She could hear Grant’s voice but nothing made sense. She knew she had to sit down soon or she would fall. So close was she to fainting. There was no way she could attend the meeting. She wouldn’t even be able to make it to the door, forget going past it. She knew she was letting Grant and Becky down, but there was nothing she could do about it except wish that she had not come in either.

  The sensations grew worse as she felt her head swim and her body sway. Grant seemed to sense that something was wrong and looked up from the notes. He saw her move slowly around the desk, holding the edge until she was safely in her seat. Within seconds he had gone to the kitchen and returned with a glass of cold water. He saw her try to stop her unsteady hands from spilling the contents. ‘Lord hell’, he thought, ‘this was not going to work.’ Tizzy was a mess. He would have to handle this as best as he could. Again he thought ‘No wonder Becky would never let Tizzy attend any of the meeting.’

  “Are you all right? Look, forget I asked you to come. You stay here. I’ll handle it. If I have a question, I will come over. I better get Roger to come and sit with you for a while. You still look very pale.” he turned to walk towards the door.

  The tears had started. Tizzy did not know if it was from relief at not having to face Peter Branson or disappointment at letting everyone down. A second later he was back by her side. He reached out to comfort her but she shrank from his touch and he withdrew his arms to his side.

  Maintaining his distance, he squat down and said “Tizzy, will you be ok if I leave you alone for a little while. I have to go and see Branson. I will be back as soon as our meeting is over. I’ll call Roger or one of the girls to sit with you.”

  “No ..I www..ill be all right. I am so...orry...” Tizzy let out in between tears.

  Grant stood a moment. He saw the tears fall down her cheeks. She wiped them with the back of her hand. He noted that even now she had not taken off her glasses. ‘Oh hell’, he thought. He better excuse himself from the meeting. She wasn’t his problem and his show of concern had not been wanted, so he asked himself as to why was he still worried about her? A minute seemed to have passed and she said “Ppl..ease. go...i will bbb.ee fine.”

  He picked up the folder and was just about to do as asked, when looking up he found Branson standing at the doorway. With disapproval clearly written on his face, he looked from one to the other.

  “I am sorry, I seem to have come in at the wrong moment.” Branson said sternly “Look we can make this another day.” Branson hated being kept waiting and hated it even more when that delay was because of a woman. If Grant was having an affair, that was his problem but Peter Branson was not going to put up with unprofessional behaviour from anyone. The fact that he was very fond of Grant made no difference to this policy.

  Grant too was equally annoyed. Branson’s tone clearly expressed what he was thinking. It was clearly apparent that Branson thought that he had caught them out. He would have to set things straight later on but clarifying things at that moment would have been like adding fuel to the fire. He continued to look at Branson and noticed Branson’s expression change. Branson was not looking at him anymore but at Tizzy with an unreadable but strange expression. Then he glanced at Grant and back at Tizzy. That action irritated Grant for he knew exactly what Branson was thinking. It was transparent. ‘There was no way Grant would be involved with someone like Tizzy’. Grant wondered why this should upset him. It should have brought relief.

  Grant was not wrong in his deduction. When Branson had first appeared at the doorway, he had only seen Tizzy’s bent head.Now he saw her properly. This girl was ‘a nothing’. There was no way Grant would be involved with someone as plain as Tizzy. He had seen the women Grant had previously dated. He had recently even heard that Grant had been seen with a stunning model. He felt guilty at jumping to the wrong conclusion. This was no ‘office affair’. He would have gon
e back to Grant’s office, but something about Tizzy held his interest. Maybe it was that forlorn aura she had about her or maybe because she reminded him so much of his own daughter.

  Tizzy in the meanwhile had calmed down considerably. Her palpitation had stopped as soon as Grant had told her that she would not have to meet Branson. The cold water had eased the pain in her head but she still did not trust herself to stand up. She continued to look at the man standing at the doorway. ‘If Grant would just walk out with him, everything would be fine’.

  As if Grant had heard her prayer, he walked over to Branson and said “Peter we might as well get back. I’ve got everything I need now.”

  Grant knew well that courtesy demanded that he introduce Peter to Tizzy but having witnessed the panic attack, he now feared the consequence of the introduction. He began to move as if to leave but instead of following him Branson walked further into the room and in Tizzy’s direction.

  “So this is where your geniuses work.” All the while Branson kept his eyes focused on Tizzy. Grant could feel his annoyance grow. He was very fond of Branson. Their relationship extended beyond their business dealings. But Branson should have followed his lead and left the room. Unknowingly Branson was going to aggravate an already delicate situation.

  “Yes and unless we leave one of my genius alone, she won’t be able to live up to her reputation.” Grant voiced in a hurry and hoped Peter would get the message. Instead Peter seemed more adamant to stay in the room.

  “With such a compliment it would be remiss if I left without meeting her myself” All the while Branson was moving closer to Tizzy.

  Reaching her, he held out his hand. Grant looked apologetically at Tizzy and hoped she would be able to cope.

  As soon as Tizzy noted that the attention had focused on her, all the earlier sensations returned. Her breathing visibly increased, perspiration covered her forehead and her mouth began to go dry.

  Grant was now angry but he was unable to display it for he could not establish the subject of his anger. Was it Peter? Becky? Or was it Tizzy herself? ‘Hell, this was really no way to run a business’

  Branson continued to look at Tizzy and then suddenly looked around as if searching for something. Pulling a sheet of butcher’s paper off the table he cupped it into a ball and taking it over to Tizzy commanded “Breath into this. Breath!” The voice was stern but strangely soothing to Tizzy. She did as she was told. “Now sit with your head tucked between your knees and breathe slowly. Very slowly.” She did that too.

  Five minutes later Tizzy sat up. The colour had returned to her face and she looked better

  “Ttthaank y..ou.” she whispered.

  Branson’s eyes welled up with tears. Grant was shocked to see a grown man get so emotional. Branson’s action to wipe the tears away did not go unseen either.

  “Peter Branson.” Stretching out his hand, he introduced himself.

  Grant recovered from his shock and made the formal introduction “Peter this is Tizzy McKenzie. Tizzy, Peter Branson.”

  Tizzy shook his hand and was embarrassed by her clammy ones. Branson did not seem to mind but when he hadn’t released them straight away, Grant noticed that Tizzy actually pulled hers back.

  “I will leave you gentlemen to talk. I have some work to do in the printin..g department.” Without another glance she walked away towards the coffee room leaving Grant and Peter staring after her, noting her unsteady gait.

  The two men recovered as soon as she was out of view.

  “Sorry Grant. I guess I should have waited in your office”. Branson apologies but his tone said ‘I am glad I came’.

  “That is all right. How did you know what to do?” Grant questioned.

  “My daughter had the same problem.” He answered as they began to walk towards Grant’s office.

  “You have a daughter? I thought you didn’t have any children. Didn’t you say your wife and you blamed each other for not having a child?”

  “No, we blamed each other for losing our child.” Branson whispered

  “I am sorry” Grant did not know how to proceed further.

  “She left home when she was seventeen. We rarely heard from her and then one day the police knocked on our doors. It was too late for everything by then. Too late to say sorry. Too late to make amends. She was our only child you know. Margaret and I blamed each other for her death. The pressure of it took its toll on our marriage and we both decided to go our separate ways. How old is Ms McKenzie?”

  “I am not really sure” Grant acknowledged.

  “Does she have a family?” Peter continued.

  “She wears a wedding ring and I have seen her with two children.” Grant replied finding his answer strangely dampening. Suddenly he realised where Branson’s questions were going.

  “Peter, is she your daughter?” Grant asked looking straight into Peter’s eyes.

  Peter was stunned by the question. “No Grant, as I said my daughter is dead and even if she was alive, she would have been in her early forties. Ms McKenzie looks a lot younger than that.”

  They reached Grant’s office and were soon immersed in work. The meeting went off really well and Peter was extremely happy with the progress. He asked for a couple of changes, Grant took them back to Tizzy and the changes were successfully made within minutes. They agreed to meet on the Friday to see the final product.

  Grant bid Peter goodbye and returned to his desk to take a call. The conversation was brief. Another corporate company wanted T & G Mallaby to take over their advertising campaign. Grant first instinct was elation but reality soon brought him back to earth. He had a major problem on hand, one that would need his urgent attention. Becky’s replacement would have to be found quickly as she would commence her maternity leave in a few months. That would leave Tizzy as head of the department. He had seen her go to pieces this morning. There was no way she would be able to cope with the additional requirements. The success of his company depended on the happiness of both the clients and the staff.

  Though worried, he had to admit that he was intrigued by Tizzy’s past and her problems. He told himself he would need to speak to Becky. If anyone knew anything about Tizzy, it was Becky.

  Picking up the Branson file he walked back in the direction of the Art’s department. As he took the turn he stopped dead in his track. There behind the protection of the room divider stood Branson, quietly observing Tizzy at work. Grant stood a moment longer and then went back to his office. He called the Human Resources department and asked for Tizzy’s file to be brought to him. He assured the HR Manager that there was no problem. That due to the expansion of the business he was looking at suitable staff to take over some additional work and as Becky would be going on maternity leave he wanted to check out Tizzy’s credentials. The explanation sounded plausible and Steven, the HR Manager was in Grant’s office within ten minutes.

  Grant felt guilty at his little lie but he really needed to know if there was a possibility that she could be Peter’s daughter. Peter had declared her dead but then why was he so interest in Tizzy. He almost felt a voyeur looking into her life. Her bio data was neatly typed. Her name was Trizella McKenzie. Her date of birth was 09 May. The year of birth made her just twenty-eight years old. He wasn’t sure if he was relieved to discover her age or if he was even more intrigued at Branson’s action. He read on but apart from details about her education and qualifications, there really wasn’t anything revealing in her Bio-data. She had done her schooling in Western Australia and obtainer her degree in advertising in Sydney. It was company policy not to ask if people were married and she had not volunteered the information either. Becky had been named as her contact in the case of an emergency. From here he was back to guesswork. He noticed Steven looking at him. To make the situation look realistic, he got up and photocopied her bio-data, flicked through her reference and certificates and returned the file. There were no references before that first job in Sydney.

  Steven left taking the
file with him. Like everyone else he knew Tizzy was a brilliant worker but he also aware of her many drawbacks. He could not understand how Grant could consider her as a suitable applicant. In his view, Grant would be better off getting someone new. Tizzy could not even greet him without stuttering. Meetings and public relations would be out of the question.

  Grant walked in the direction of Tizzy’s office. Branson was no longer there and Tizzy was not at her desk either. Blast! He had to return the file. Forced into leave it on her desk along with a note, he walked up to it. As he placed the folder down, his eyes fell on the photograph. It was of the children he had seen with her. He noted that both children resembled their father.

  “Was everything all right?” Tizzy’s voice broke through.

  Grant turned “Yes, actually better than all right. Branson was very happy. Didn’t he come back here?” he queried.

  “No. Did he want something?” Tizzy gave a puzzled reply.

  Grant noticed that the two sentences had been said without a stutter.

  “I must have been mistaken. He seemed to have been heading this way.” Grant replied

  “He didn’t come to this office.” she said and then after a moment’s hesitation inquired “Grant did you want to speak to me about the Branson file?” She noticed the file lying on her desk.

  Without answering her question Grant remarked “They are beautiful children. How old are they?”

  “Ff.ii.ve and four” she stuttered back. Grant noted that she was also fidgeting, a sign that she was nervous.

  “Who looks after them when you are at work?” he could not help asking

  “Their father, I only get them on alternate week...eeends.” she replied.

  “And you are happy with that arrangement?” he inquired

  “More that hap..py. Every minute I get with them is a bonus.”

  There was no bitterness in her voice. Grant wondered at the kind of marriage she must have had and was curious to know as to what had ended it? Had she wanted it to end? And why had the father got the custody of the children? But he knew these questions were too personal to ask at this moment. As these thoughts were doing nothing to uplift his spirits, he decided to get back to work.

  Realising that he was still holding the photograph in his hand, he quickly placed it back.

  “I’ve left the file on your desk. Let Becky know that Branson will be in on Friday to finalise things.”

  With that he was gone. Tizzy had a few sips of cold water. She had worked so well for the past five years but now suddenly she could not be in the same room as Grant without feeling nervous and shy. She again reminded herself to stay in her safe world. She recalled that Grant could not wait to leave her car and now he had rushed out of the office. That was the reality and she would do well to remember it.

  Half an hour later she was once again busy working at her desk. An hour later she had not moved. Two hours passed and she had completed one more job. She looked at the end product with pride. She knew the clients would be happy. After the first couple of jobs, the company had made it a pre-requisite that Tizzy do their work. She knew once again she would not disappoint them.

  So engrossed was she at looking at her work that she failed to notice Grant walk by. He looked straight ahead. Only those watching closely would have seen him glance at Tizzy. He was now acutely aware of Tizzy’s presence, just as she was of his. He did not miss her standing by her desk inspecting her work, nor the smile that had touched her lips. ‘She should smile more often’, he thought. And take those hideous glasses off. Surely she could find a frame that would be more complimentary to her looks.

  ‘What a pity that the outer package did not match her inner talent’ he thought. She would have been an ideal replacement for Becky’s position. Tizzy knew what the clients wanted. This was an amazing feat for she never spoke to the clients themselves. Becky and Tizzy’s partnership was brilliant. What a great pity it was all going to change!