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My head falls back and my eyes roll upward before fluttering closed as I feel the sensation of what he’s doing to me.
“Christ,” Alex growls as he pulls his finger out and then pushes two back inside my slickness.
I can’t even respond; a guttural sound pours out of me while my h*ps flex against his hand.
“Is that what you wanted?” he pants as he wraps his other arm around me even tighter, his fingers moving in and out of me in a not-so-gentle way.
“Yes,” I cry out when his fingers curl inward, massaging a spot inside of me that I had read about once, but figured mine got misplaced or something. Now I know it exists.
“Please tell me to slow down, Sutton,” he begs me softly, but I can tell by the tone of his voice, he wants it this way—wild, crazy, out of control—just as much as I do.
“No,” I deny his request, feeling my blood racing in response to the movement of his hand against me. “I need more. Want more. ”
Alex finally kisses me, grinding his lips against me roughly as he pumps his fingers between my legs. I can feel the rumblings of an orgasm and this causes me some dismay because I’m not ready to let go of this feeling just yet. I need to see Alex just a bit more out of control with me.
“Alex,” I beg as I grip onto his biceps…but I’m not sure what I’m begging for.
Tearing his lips from mine, he stares down at me. “What? What do you need?”
I can’t answer, because his fingers never stop moving, never stop pushing and pulling against me, causing my head to spin and my blood to rage.
“Want me to f**k you now?” he asks, his voice sounding so dangerous that I almost cl**ax just from the sexy timbre.
“God, yes,” I say quickly and I finally reach out so I can touch that part of him that I want inside of me desperately. My hand wedges down in between us, my fingers wrapping roughly around his erection through the denim material. It’s huge in my hand and I can’t wait to feel it inside of me.
I need to feel it inside of me.
Pushing my other hand in between our bodies, I start to work at his belt buckle but I can’t seem to get my coordination down. The sound of our harsh breathing fills the air, adding to the excitement and intensity of the moment.
After just a few seconds of futile fumbling, Alex pulls his fingers out of me and pushes me away. Stunned, I look at him but he’s already bending over and grabbing the box of condoms. His hands are sure and steady whereas mine are shaking. He makes short work of opening the box and pulling a foil packet out.
Thrusting the condom into my hands, he starts to unbuckle his belt. I don’t move but just watch him as he whips the belt out of the loops around his jeans and unbuttons them. My chest is heaving up and down, my breath coming in desperate pants.
“Open the condom,” he commands me gruffly.
I blink hard, then start tearing at the foil, my fingers slipping twice before I get it open. Looking back at Alex, I see he has his jeans opened and is pushing them down his h*ps until his c**k is freed. He grasps it in hand and starts stroking himself, but he’s already hard and deliciously engorged. I stare at him, fascinated to watch the way he touches himself. He’s utterly beautiful in his mast***ation and a shudder ripples through me at the sight.
“Put it on me,” Alex demands and my eyes flick briefly up to his. His expression is fierce, his eyes glittering with desire. My own lust roils thickly and I already feel on the verge of exploding. I hate to admit it, but the way in which he is taking control is just as thrilling as the touch of his fingers inside of me just moments ago.
As he steps forward, Alex’s hand falls away and I easily roll the condom on, my hands only slightly shaking as I make contact with the heat of the silky skin of his shaft, and hear the moan that he lets out.
“Arms around my neck,” Alex tells me softly, but with no less authority than he has used before.
I don’t even hesitate, and the minute my arms wind around his neck, he reaches down with his hands and grips my na**d ass, hauling me up his body. I wrap my legs around him and feel the hot press of his erection between my legs.
I have no clue what Alex intends to do with me but it doesn’t matter because my thoughts scatter as he attacks my mouth with his own. He tilts his head to angle in perfectly, and his mouth covers mine, his tongue taking complete possession. Our soft moans fill the air and I’m vaguely aware of Alex walking; then my back is pressed against my front door. His fingers dig into the muscles of my butt, one hand sliding lower to graze his fingers against my wetness— which causes me to cry out with more frustration.
My h*ps tilt back and forth, rubbing myself against Alex’s c**k in a frenzy, eager to get him inside of me.
Pushing me into the door, Alex uses one hand to adjust himself and dips his pelvis slightly until he’s lined up perfectly. He takes a moment and his lips go still against me. His forehead falls forward until it’s touching mine and a harsh breath blows out of his mouth across my lips. Then he flexes forward and pushes into me in one burst of motion, all the way to the hilt…so very deep. The groan that Alex releases speaks of a hunger that’s about to get satisfied in a brutally fast way.
I moan long and low, a tightening twinge of pleasure spreading from between my legs and snaking its way up my spine. I won’t last long…just a few moves from Alex and I’ll be finished.
“God, Sutton…you feel so f**king good,” he whispers, his forehead still resting against mine.
I respond by clenching my muscles around his dick and rotating my pelvis to grind down on him.
“Shit,” he grates out, answering me by pulling out and slamming back into me, causing the door to shudder.
“Oh, Alex,” I moan, because I think that was just the best feeling in the entire world. “Do it again. ”
“I’m going to f**k you so hard,” he warns me.
Nodding my head, I reiterate, “I told you I wanted harder. ”
Alex lifts his forehead and stares at me somberly for a moment. “We’ll try soft and sweet later, okay?”
“Okay,” I agree breathlessly, just as eager to see him that way.
But he doesn’t move, still staring at me. “There’s going to be a later, right?”
My brows furrow in, surprised by this vulnerability I’m seeing from Alex, especially coming on the heels of his promise to “fuck me so hard” just moments ago.
Uncoiling one of my arms from around his neck, I touch his cheek with my fingertips. “Yes, there will be a later. A lot of laters, I hope. ”
He rewards me with a smile that is relieved and grateful, but then is immediately replaced with carnal determination. “Then hang on. ”
I loop my arm back around Alex’s neck, using the leverage to pull myself up just as he draws backward. I come down just as he pushes back into me, creating delicious friction between our bodies.
Alex pulls back with a sigh and surges forward with a grunt—over and over again. My own breath is forced from my chest every time he pounds into my body, causing my pulse to speed up. He’s hitting me so very deep and I feel light-headed from the fog of passion permeating the air. The sounds of our hard f**king are sinfully dirty, only adding to the excitement and fueling us on to go harder…faster…deeper.
The door is rattling, our skin is slapping. Alex is groaning from deep within his chest, and he’s slamming into me so forcefully at times, I’m starting to make little mewling noises because it feels so good. A droplet of sweat rolls off of Alex’s temple and drops down to my upper chest, which is still gracefully covered by my robe. It scorches me, and my legs squeeze tighter around him as he tunnels into me deeper and deeper.
Like an avalanche rumbling down an unsuspecting mountain, my orgasm starts right at that spot that his c**k is hitting inside of me, then bursts outward in a cataclysmic explosion that catches me off guard. I have no choice. I cannot stop myself from screaming Alex’s name because t
his is the most intense pleasure I have ever experienced in my life.
Whether Alex was just ready or he was excited by me calling out his name, he slams into me one more time, hitting me at the deepest point imaginable, and buries his face into the crook of my neck.
“I’m coming,” he groans, and then he pulls back and slams forward again with a grunt. “Fu-u-u-ck. ”
I can feel him flex his h*ps inward as he orgasms, a shudder of ecstasy cascading through his body. He pumps in and out of me a few more times, the friction causing microbursts of pleasure to course through me.
When he finally goes still, I become overwhelmed with emotion.
This was utterly perfect.
The most uniquely thrilling moment of my life.
I have never felt so good and I wonder if this will ever be replicated.
Alex gave me exactly what I asked for. Exactly what I needed. And without an ounce of shame, I realize I want more from him.
Tightening his grip under my butt, Alex nuzzles against my neck and I can feel him pulse inside of me again. “Are you okay?”
“Mmm-hmm,” I reply as I sift my fingers through his hair and arch my back. “That was amazing. ”
Pulling his face back, he looks down at me, still keeping me pinned to the door. His eyes are curious and warm. “Was that what you needed?”
“Mmm-hmm. ”
Leaning in to kiss me softly, he asks, “Can you say anything other than ‘Mmm-hmm’?”
“I’m hungry,” I murmur against his lips.
“Chinese?”
“Mmm-hmm. ”
When Alex pulls out of me and sets me down, I keenly feel the loss of his warmth inside of me, and it makes me sad. My legs feel like jelly, so I just lean back against the door as I watch him pull the condom off and knot the end.
“Bathroom’s first door on the left,” I tell him, pointing down the hall as I watch him pull up his jeans with his free hand. “I’ll order the food. ”
He gives me a soft smile and nods. Just before he starts down the hallway, he turns to me. “Then you can tell me about your day?”
“Sure,” I say softly.
Although not that long ago I wanted nothing but to purge the memories of today into a black hole of forgetfulness, I have an overwhelming desire to share my misery with Alex. I feel a need—almost painful in nature—to seek comfort from him. Something more than just hard and sweaty sex.
I need to hear his voice, and maybe have his arms wrapped around me, while I tell him all about Mara and how useless I feel right now.
***
Long after Alex f**ked me up against my front door, and long after we stuffed ourselves with cold sesame noodles and fried rice while sitting on my living room rug, eating our meal from my coffee table, and only after Alex pushed me down to said living room floor and took me in a frenzy again, do I finally tell him about what happened with Mara.
He pulls me up from the floor and into his arms, walking me back to my bedroom, where we crawl into my bed and pull the covers up snugly around us. He holds me while I share with him the details of Mara’s overdose.
Alex doesn’t say a word while I talk but just strokes my back with his fingers and every so often grazes his lips against my temple. When I admit with no small amount of shame that I’m terrified I’m going to lose Mara, and that I am doubting my own abilities as a counselor, Alex takes his fingers and places them against my lips to silence my words.
“Don’t,” he says quietly. “Don’t doubt yourself…not for a minute. ”
Turning my head to the side to dislodge his fingers from my mouth, I argue, “But I don’t think I can reach her. You should have seen her in the hospital. She wouldn’t even look at me. Wouldn’t talk to me. ”
“Some people don’t want to be reached. Some people love the misery. ”
“No,” I deny adamantly. “She doesn’t love misery. She hates what the drugs have done to her parents. ”