But excuse my brain-sick ramblings. I have intimations of some vast discovery still, if I could only see my way clear; though as yet I wander in darkness, led only by marsh-lights.
To more positive matters: the Clinic here is run along very clean and efficient lines, and is exploring various lines of treatment, including water therapy; and might act as a model for my own project, should it ever come to fruition. Dr. Binswanger has been most hospitable, and has given me access to some of the more interesting cases here. Much to my relief, there are no celebrated murderesses among them, but only what the worthy Dr. Workman of Toronto terms "the innocent insane," as well as the usual sufferers from nervous complaints, and the inebriates and syphilitics; although of course one does not find the same afflictions among the well-to-do as among the poor.
I was overjoyed to hear that you may soon favour the world with a miniature copy of yourself, through the kind offices of your esteemed wife - to whom, please send my respectful regards. How calming it must be, to have a settled family life, with a trustworthy and dependable woman capable of providing it! Tranquillity is indeed much undervalued by men, except those who lack it. I envy you!
As for myself, I fear I am doomed to wander the face of the earth alone, like one of Byron's gloomier and more lugubrious outcasts; though I would be much heartened, my dear fellow, to be able to grasp once more your true friend's hand. This chance may soon come, as I understand that the prospects for a peaceful resolution of the current differences between North and South are not hopeful, and the Southern States talk seriously of secession. In the event of an outbreak of hostilities, my duty to my country will be clear. As Tennyson says in his overly botanical fashion, it is time to pluck "the blood-red blossom of war." Given my present tumultuous and morbid mental state, it will be a relief to have a duty of some kind set before me, no matter how deplorable the occasion for it.
Your brain-sore and weary, but affectionate friend,
Simon.
From Grace Marks, the Provincial Penitentiary, Kingston; to
Signor Geraldo Ponti, Master of Neuro-Hypnotism, Ventriloquist,
and Mind-Reader Extraordinaire; care of The Prince of Wales
Theatre, Queen Street, Toronto, Canada West.
September 25th, 1861.
Dear Jeremiah:
Your Show was on a poster, which Dora got hold of one of them, and pinned it to the laundry wall, to liven it up; and I knew at once it was you, even though you have another name and have grown your beard very wild. One of the gentlemen paying attentions to Miss Marianne saw the Show when it was at Kingston, and said the Future Told in Letters of Fire was a first-class item, and worth the price of admission, as two ladies fainted; and he said your beard was bright red. So I expect you have dyed it, unless it is a wig.
I did not attempt to contact you while in Kingston, as it might have resulted in difficulties if discovered. But I saw where the Show was next to be performed, and that is why I am sending this to the Theatre in Toronto, in hopes it will find you. It must be a new Theatre, as they had none of that name when I was last there; but that is twenty years ago now, although it seems a hundred.
How I would like to see you again, and to talk over old times, in the kitchen at Mrs. Alderman Parkinson's, when we would all have such fun, before Mary Whitney died and misfortune overtook me! But in order to pass muster here, you would have to disguise yourself more, as a red beard would not be enough at close quarters. And if they found you out, they would think you had tricked them, as what is done on a stage is not as acceptable, as the very same thing done in a library; and they would want to know why you are no longer Dr. Jerome DuPont. But I suppose the other pays better.
Since the Hypnotism, the people here seem to treat me better, and with more esteem, although perhaps it is only that they are more afraid of me; sometimes it is hard to tell the difference. They will not speak about what was said on that occasion, as they are of the opinion that it might unsettle my reason; which I doubt would be the case. But although I have the run of the house again, and tidy the rooms and serve the tea as formerly, it has not had any effect on my being set free.
I have often pondered about why Dr. Jordan left so suddenly, right after; but as you yourself left quite soon as well, I expect you do not know the answer. Miss Lydia was very taken aback at Dr. Jordan's departure, and would not come down to dinner for a week, but had it sent up on a tray; and she lay in bed as if ill, which made it very difficult to tidy her room, with her face all pale and dark circles under her eyes, and acted the tragedy queen. But young ladies are permitted to carry on in that way.
After that she took to going out to more parties with more young men than ever, and especially a certain Captain, which nothing came of him; and she got the name of a romp amongst the military men; and then there were rows with her mother, and when another month had gone by it was announced that she was engaged to be married to the Reverend Verringer; which was a surprise, as she always used to make fun of him behind his back, and say he looked like a frog.
The wedding date was set a great deal sooner than is usual, and I was kept very busy sewing from morning to night. Miss Lydia's travelling dress was of blue silk, with self-covered buttons and two layers to the skirt; and I thought I would go blind hemming it. They had their honeymoon at Niagara Falls, which they say is an experience not to be missed, I have only seen pictures of it; and when they came back she was a different person, very subdued and pale, with no high spirits any more. It is not a good plan to marry a man you do not love, but many do and get used to it in time. And others marry from love and repent at leisure, as they say.
I thought for a while that she had a liking for Dr. Jordan; but she would not have been happy with him, nor he with her, as she would not have understood his interest in lunatics, and his curiosities, and the strange questions about vegetables that he used to ask. So it was just as well.
As for the help Dr. Jordan promised me, I have heard nothing of it, and nothing of him, except that he has gone off to the Southern war, which news I had through Reverend Verringer; but whether he is alive or dead I do not know. In addition to which, there was a great many rumours going about, concerning him and his landlady, who was a widow of sorts; and after he left, she could be seen wandering in a distracted manner by the lakeshore in a black dress and cloak and a black veil blowing in the wind, and some said she was intending to throw herself in. It was much talked about, especially in the kitchen and laundry; and we got many an earful from Dora, who was once the servant there. What she had to tell, you would scarcely credit, of two such outwardly respectable people, with screams and groans and horrifying goings-on at night, as bad as a haunted house, and the bed linen a shambles every morning, and in such a state as made her blush to look at it. And Dora said it was a wonder he hadn't killed this lady and buried the body in the yard outside, as she'd seen the spade for it standing ready, and a grave already dug, which made her blood run cold; as he was the sort of man who would ruin one woman after another and then tire of them, and murder them just to get rid of them, and every time he looked at the widow lady it was with fearsome blazing eyes like a tiger's, as if ready to spring on her and sink his teeth into her. And it was the same with Dora herself, and who knew but that she might have been the next to fall victim to his ravenous frenzies? She had a willing audience in the kitchen, as there are many who like to listen to a shocking tale, and I must say she made a good story out of it. But I thought myself she got carried away.
At that same time the Governor's wife called me into the parlour, and asked me very earnestly if Dr. Jordan had ever made any improper advances to me; and I said that he had not, and that in any case the door to the sewing room had always been kept open. Then she said she had been deceived as to his character, and she had been harbouring a viper in the bosom of her family; and next she said that the poor lady in black had been interfered with by him, having been alone in her house with the servant gone, although I was not to speak of it,
as to do so would cause more harm than good; and although this lady was a married lady, and her husband had been abominable to her, and thus it was not quite so bad as if she'd been a young girl, still Dr. Jordan had behaved most improperly, and it was a mercy things with Miss Lydia had never gone so far as an engagement.
Not that I think there was any idea of such, in Dr. Jordan's mind at all; nor do I believe everything that was being said against him, as I know what it is to have lies told about a person, and you not able to defend yourself. And widows are always up to tricks, until they get too old for it.
But that is all idle gossip. This is what I would especially like to ask you: Did you really see into the future, when you looked into my palm and said five for luck, which I took to mean all would come out well in the end? Or were you only trying to comfort me? I would very much like to know, as sometimes the time stretches out so long, I can scarcely endure it. I am afraid of falling into hopeless despair, over my wasted life, and I am still not sure how it happened. The Reverend Verringer often prays with me, or I should say he prays and I listen; but it is not much good, as it only makes me tired. He says he will get up another Petition, but I fear it will not be of any more use than the others have been, and he might as well not waste the paper.
The other thing I would like to know is, why did you want to help me? Was it as a challenge, and to outwit the others, as with the smuggling you used to do; or was it out of affection and fellow-feeling? You said once we were of the same sort, and I have often pondered over that.
I hope this will reach you, but if it does, I don't know how you will get word back to me, as any letter I might have they would be sure to open. However I think you did send me a message, as some months ago I received a bone button, addressed to me though with no signature, and the Matron said, Grace, why would anyone send you a single button? And I said I did not know. But as it was the same pattern as the button you gave to me in the kitchen at Mrs. Alderman Parkinson's, I felt it must be you, to let me know I was not altogether forgotten. Perhaps there was another message in it also, as a button is for keeping things closed up, or else for opening them; and you may have been telling me to keep silent, about certain things we both know of. Dr. Jordan believed that even common and unregarded objects can have a meaning, or else recall to memory a thing forgotten; and you may only have been reminding me of yourself, which indeed was not needed, as I have never forgotten you and your kindnesses to me, nor ever will.
I hope you are in good health, dear Jeremiah, and that your Magic Show is a great success,
From, your old friend,
Grace Marks.
From Mrs. William P. Jordan, Laburnum House, Loomisville,
Massachusetts, The United States of America; to Mrs. C. D.
Humphrey, Lower Union Street, Kingston, Canada West.
May 15th, 1862.
Dear Mrs. Humphrey:
Your communication to my dear Son came to hand this morning. I open all his mail nowadays, for reasons I will shortly explain. But first permit me to remark, that I could have wished you to express yourself in a less extravagant manner. To threaten to do yourself an injury, by jumping off a bridge or other elevated location, might carry weight with an impressionable and tender-hearted young man, but it does not, with his more experienced Mother.
In any case, your hope of an interview with him must be disappointed. Upon the outbreak of our current lamentable war, my Son joined the Union army to fight for his country in the capacity of Military Surgeon, and was sent at once to a field hospital near the front. The postal services have been sadly disrupted, and the troops are moved about so quickly due to the railroads, and I had no word of him for some months, which was not like him as he has always been a most regular and faithful correspondent; and I feared the worst.
In the meantime I did what I could in my own limited sphere. This unfortunate War had already killed and wounded so many, and we saw the results daily, as yet more men and boys were brought in to our improvised Hospitals, mutilated and blinded, or out of their minds with infectious fevers; and every one of them a dearly loved Son. The ladies of our town were kept thoroughly occupied, in visiting them and arranging for them any little home-like comforts it was within our power to supply; and I myself aided them as best I could, despite my own indifferent state of health; as I could only hope that if my dear Son were lying ill and suffering elsewhere, some other Mother was doing the same for him.
At last, a convalescent soldier from this town reported hearing a rumour that my dear Son had been struck in the head by a piece of flying debris, and when last heard of had been lingering between this world and the next. Of course I was almost dead with worry, and moved Heaven and earth to discover his whereabouts; until much to my joy, he was returned to us, still alive but sadly weakened both in body and spirit. As a result of his wound he had lost a part of his memory; for although he recalled his loving Parent, and the events of his childhood, his more recent experiences had been completely erased from his mind, among them his interest in Lunatic Asylums, and the period of time he spent in the city of Kingston; including whatever relations of any kind he may or may not have had with yourself.
I tell you this that you may see things in a broader - and I may add, a less selfish perspective. One's own personal doings look small indeed, when faced with the momentous travails of History, which we can only trust are for the greater good.
Meanwhile, I must congratulate you on the fact that your husband has been at last located, although I must also commiserate with you on the unfortunate circumstances. To discover that one's spouse has passed away due to prolonged intoxication and the resulting delirium, cannot have been at all pleasant. I am happy to hear that he had not yet exhausted his entire means; and would suggest to you, as a practical matter, a dependable Annuity, or - what has served me quite well during my own trials - a modest investment in railway shares, if a solid company, or else in Sewing Machines, which are sure to make great progress in the future.
However, the course of action you propose to my Son is neither desirable nor feasible, even should he be in any condition to entertain it. My Son was under no engagement to you, nor is he under any obligation. What you yourself may have understood, does not constitute an understanding. It is also my duty to inform you, that before his departure my Son became as good as engaged to be married, to Miss Faith Cartwright, a young lady of fine family and impeccable moral character, the only obstacle remaining, being his own honour, which prevented him from requesting that Miss Cartwright bind herself to a man whose life was so soon to be imperilled; and despite his damaged and at times delirious state, she is resolved to respect the wishes of the two families, as well as those of her own heart, and is at present helping me to nurse him with loyal devotion.
He does not yet remember her in her proper person, but persists in believing that she is called Grace - an understandable confusion, as Faith is very close to it in concept; but we persevere in our efforts, and as we daily show him various little homely objects once dear to him, and lead him on walks through local spots of natural beauty, we have increasing hopes that his full memory will shortly return, or at least as much of it as is necessary, and that he will soon be well enough to fulfil his marital undertakings. It is the foremost concern of Miss Cartwright, as it should be for all those who love my Son disinterestedly, to pray for his restoration to health and the full use of his mental faculties.
In closing, let me add that I trust your future life will be more productive of happiness, than has been the recent past; and that the evening of your life will bring with it a serenity, which the vain and tempestuous passions of youth so often unfortunately, if not disastrously, preclude.
Yours most sincerely,
(Mrs.) Constance P. Jordan.
P.S. Any further communication from you, will be destroyed unread.
From the Reverend Enoch Verringer, Chairman, The Committee to Pardon Grace Marks, Sydenham Street Methodist Church, Kingston, Ontario, T
he Dominion of Canada; to Dr. Samuel Bannerling, M.D., The Maples, Front Street, Toronto, Ontario, The Dominion of Canada.
Kingston, October 15th, 1867.
Dear Dr. Bannerling:
I presume to write to you, Sir, in connection with the Committee of which I am the Chairman, upon a worthy mission which cannot be unfamiliar to you. As the former medical attendant upon Grace Marks, when she was in the Toronto Lunatic Asylum almost fifteen years ago, I know you have been approached by the representatives of several previous committees charged with submitting petitions to the Government, on behalf of this unfortunate and unhappy, and to some minds, wrongly convicted woman, in hopes that you would append your name to the petitions in question - an addition which, as I am sure you are aware, would carry considerable weight with the Government authorities, as they have a tendency to be respectful of informed medical opinion such as your own.
Our Committee consists of a number of ladies, my own dear wife among them, and of several gentlemen of standing, and clergymen of three denominations, including the Prison Chaplain, whose names you will find appended. Such petitions have in the past been unsuccessful, but the Committee expects, as well as hopes, that with the recent political changes, most notably the advent of a fully representational Parliament under the leadership of John A. Macdonald, this one will receive a favourable reception denied to its predecessors.
In addition, we have the advantage of modern science, and the advances made in the study of the cerebral diseases and mental disorders - advances which must surely tell in favour of Grace Marks. Several years ago our Committee engaged a specialist in nervous ailments, Dr. Simon Jordan, who came very highly recommended. He passed a number of months in this city in making a detailed examination of Grace Marks, with particular attention to her gaps in recollection concerning the murders. In an attempt to recover her memory, he subjected her to Neuro-hypnosis, at the hands of a skilled practitioner of that science - a science which, after a long eclipse, appears to be coming back into favour, both as a diagnostic and as a curative method, although it has thus far gained more favour in France than in this hemisphere.