“I’ve been thinking about this for hours. When I took his life—the man who dared to participate in harming you—all I could think about was when I got back I would find a place between your thighs again, and, for a few minutes, all would be right in the world.”
“I wish….”
She didn’t finish what she almost said. She wished they could really mate because they couldn’t and saying so would make her want to do it and damn the consequences.
“I’m not interested in wishes tonight, sweetheart.” He shook his head. “Tonight I only want what is real. And what is true. Want to know what I mean, Lake? I refer to you and me and right now. The Moon is above us and loves us eternally. If I can’t yet have what I will someday get, then, tonight, worshiping you is enough.”
He pushed her legs apart, and, where earlier he had invaded her pussy—and possibly her soul—with a flick of his finger, it was his tongue this time wrenching the cries from her. Beaux found her clit like he had been doing so for years. He didn’t fumble or take a minute to find his way, instead stroking across her sensitive nub like he had been doing it for years, like they were experienced lovers.
She closed her eyes as she expelled a moan she didn’t know she could make from her mouth. “Oh, my.”
He inhaled deeply. “You taste like mine, like I’ve waited my whole life to experience this.”
Beaux had a glorious tongue, and he used it well, sucking and teasing her until she writhed beneath his mouth. Colors passed before her eyes, and, before she knew what was happening, she cried out, a release moving through her like a jet plane taking off.
Seconds later, she opened her eyes to see Beaux sitting back with a smug expression in his face.
“The way your mouth slopes down the way it does.” She sat up slowly, her head slightly spinning. “You look like the cat who ate the canary.”
“I could make a really dirty remark right now. My mother raised me better.”
She stood up and grabbed his bathrobe from the hook behind the door. It was blue and soft, like it had been worn for a long time. Maybe it was something Beaux kept with him throughout the years. As she slipped it on, she couldn’t help but feel like it was the closest thing she was going to have to his arms around her permanently since she had put the kibosh on their relationship moving forward.
A bulge in his pants showed he hadn’t been immune to his ministrations to her. Guilt flooded her, making her want to cry. She swallowed away the sensation.
“Can I please do something for you?”
“No. You know the deal here. This is for you. Someday I’ll have my cock inside of you. Until then, I don’t want your hands on me, sweetheart.”
“I think you like how I’m uncomfortable with you not getting anything out of this.”
He nodded. “You’re wrong if you think I’m not getting anything out of this. However, you’d be right, I do kind of like it.”
“Beaux.” Because there was nothing else to say.
He stood up. “What little clothes you have you need to pack up. We’ll buy more as you go. Hell, we’ll be so close to New York City you might as well stop at your apartment and get your own stuff.”
His words didn’t make sense. Or maybe her mind had addled from two mind-numbing orgasms in one day.
“Come again?”
“Happy to oblige.”
She held out her hand. “Stop, Beaux. Be serious.”
“You’re coming, Lake, is something I take extremely seriously.”
“Okay. You know what I meant.”
She was going to scream like a banshee. And maybe throw something at his head. What could she get her hands on? The shampoo bottle would do in a pinch.
“We’re flying out. We have a lead thanks to Alexei and we’re taking it, unless you don’t want to come. We’ll leave for New Jersey, courtesy of Alexei’s plane, in two hours.”
“Oh.”
She pulled her robe around her. A lead was fabulous news. Wasn’t it? Her heart rate picked up; she could feel it in her fingertips.
“Are you okay?” He stepped toward her and placed his hand on her arm. She could feel his energy hitting her skin, only this time it gave her no relief.
“Yeah. I’m fine.” She held up her hand to stop him when he was about to speak. “Okay, I’m lying. I’m not okay. I’m freaked out. This is suddenly real. In a good way. Overwhelming. We’re going to get those kids. That’s all that matters.”
“That was the truth you gave me. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” It hadn’t been easy. In fact, spitting out her weakness had felt akin to stabbing herself in the gut, but, since she had to keep a major secret from him, she could manage to not lie about other things. Even thoughts she was accustomed to keeping to herself.
“We’ll get the kids. You can stay here if you’d prefer. I thought you’d want to come. Although perhaps it makes sense to leave you here. You can get to know the pack, find your feet. Our pack will keep you safe.”
“No.” She spit the word out fast and hoped he didn’t notice. “I’d like to know your pack. I really would. But, right now, finding the kids is something I have to do.”
“I thought as much.” He pulled her against him. “Don’t be afraid. You’re with me. All will be well.”
“Promise me something.”
He took a deep breath, pushing his nose against her hair. “If I can.”
“That’s so you. You’d never agree to promise something until you knew you could.”
He didn’t make a remark, which she took as his agreement.
“I want you to promise me you’ll always do what’s needed. Even if it’s hard. Promise me you’ll never let me hurt anyone.”
“You’re a Healer. Hurting goes completely against your nature.”
Unless she’d been drugged to go crazy before she died. “Promise me anyway.”
“I’ll promise with one stipulation.”
She laughed before she could stop herself. “Of course you can’t simply say yes.”
“Do you want the promise, or don’t you?”
“What’s the stipulation?” She rubbed at her eyes before she pulled out of his embrace.
“I promise to stop you from hurting someone unless the person needs the hurting. I won’t stop you from hurting a True Believer.”
“All right, I’ll take your deal. Promise me.”
He held up his hand, and seconds later two of his fingernails had elongated into claws. After they changed, he opened his other palm and sliced across his hand, using his newly formed claws, until he drew blood.
“I swear by the Moon, Lake, to never let you hurt anyone who doesn’t deserve to die.”
His blood dripped slowly to the floor, and she followed its descent like she’d never seen the red substance before. Her own flesh ached as if he’d sliced her instead of himself. She rushed forward, grabbing onto him until the wound closed up in front of her eyes.
He groaned. “You immediately healing the pain kind of takes away the point of doing it.”
“Who asked you to swear under the Moon and blood oath? I would have taken you saying something like ‘sure Lake, I promise.’ And I can’t stand to feel strangers in pain. How do you think I’m going to feel having you harmed?”
“Your way’s not how it should be done, and point taken. Next time I want to cut myself, I’ll make sure you’re restrained somewhere.”
“Jerk.”
She shoved him. He didn’t budge and instead grinned at her.
“I’m going to pack.”
“Good idea.” He shifted his two fingers back. “I’ll pack and then go outside to give gratitude to the Moon.”
She pointed at his hand. “Show off.”
“A guy has to be able to do something to impress his mate. I’ll do whatever I can.”
“Say hi to the Moon from me while you’re at it. Ask her where she’s been all my life.”
She turned on her heel and fled the bathroom. They
had to get to the kids. Her unbelievable attraction to Beaux would have to go away.
“The Moon has always been there. You haven’t been listening hard enough,” he called after her.
“Always have to have the final word? Is that how this goes?” she hollered over her shoulder and shut herself quickly into her bedroom.
If he had a parting shot, she didn’t want to hear it. Cyrus had been famous for his last remarks when they’d been growing up. Typical Alpha werewolf. No one got to win except him.
A cool breeze moved through the room, and she shivered. Had she left the window open? A quick glance told her she had not.
Pain shot through her, and she cried out before her knees buckled. By the Moon, it felt like someone had stabbed her in her right arm. She looked down at her flesh, expecting to see it torn, but only her own unmarred skin stared up at her.
She shook on the floor, trying hard to calm her breath. If this was how things were going to be from now on, it was no surprise she’d go mad before the end. How could she not?
“Please.” She begged the Moon on the off chance anyone was actually listening. “Let me see this through. Not before we find the kids.”
Chapter Eleven
Beaux had always hated flying. He’d spent most of the time he’d tracked Lake running on four legs, the way the Moon had intended, and limited the time he had to endure the metal deathtrap.
He drummed his fingers on the armrest and tried to focus on something else. Lake sat next to him, staring out the window, though it had been a long time since she could have seen anything worth looking at. Unless she liked gray clouds.
The plane jerked, and he white knuckled so hard his hand ached. Lake turned to look at him. She raised an eyebrow before she placed her hand on his. His grip loosened, and her energy took the pain away.
Beaux squeezed her fingers. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Despite her pallor, she had a twinkle in her eye. “Does the big strong Alpha not like to fly?”
“Werewolves belong on the ground. We shift into canines. Not birds.”
He loved talking to her like this. The ease between them had changed. They had a natural banter that seemed to get easier each time they spoke. It wasn’t only her changing either. He could feel the way she altered him, made him easier, and, although the thought would have bothered him days earlier, it didn’t now. Now if she could tell him exactly why she wouldn’t mate him they’d be able to plow right ahead.
She closed her eyes and smiled. “I like flying. It means I’m going somewhere new. I know I’m meant to be a pack animal. I should want to stay home. Truthfully, I’ve always liked going places. At least for a little while.”
“Then nerves can’t explain why you’re so pale.”
Her lids opened, and he wished he could drown in the blue of her eyes. They looked like the ocean or the way the sky looked after a storm cleared out. He shook his head. When had he become so frickin’ ridiculous?
“I’ll be okay. I’m a little worn out.” She shrugged. “You know us Healers. We’re weak and bothersome.”
“The opposite, actually.” Healers were tough as nails. “Someone on this plane sick?”
“No.” She yawned.
He needed an atlas to navigate Lake’s many layers. She turned back to the window, and, much as he wanted to reach out and stroke her hair, he restrained himself. His mate hadn’t opened up to him yet. She would. He’d seen her soul bared to him during the foreplay they’d been enjoying. Lake was a passionate female. She belonged to him. He would simply have to wait her out.
If only he didn’t want to smash and destroy things. When had he ever felt so impatient?
The minutes crawled by, and he wished he had thought to bring a book. Not that he could have concentrated. His skin itched. He wanted to shift but a non-moon turn on an airplane seemed like a really poor idea.
Cyrus walked up from the back of the plane followed by Alexei and Travis. They’d hitched a ride together while the other Alphas had gone home to do what they could from their home bases. The children would be found. He was sure of it.
Beaux stood. Moving seemed an excellent idea.
Travis crossed his arms over his chest. “Don’t like flying?”
Was he wearing a sign on his head? He’d monitored his scent. No way had he broadcasted his fear.
“I’m fine.”
Alexei shook his head. “He’s trying to mate the Healer Prime. Leave him alone.”
Cyrus hissed in his breath. “Are we all accepting her role now? Has Lake decided she is?”
“It’s not really a question of whether she decides it or not.” Alexei shrugged. “Some things are.”
“Hell, Alexei. When did you start to buy into Beaux’s mumbo jumbo?” Cyrus shook his head. “You’ll have to excuse me if I can’t think of my little sister whose pigtails I used to pull as being some kind of important spiritual leader in our community.”
“I’m sitting right here, dipshit.” Lake called from her seat. “And I have werewolf hearing. Or at least I seem to again. So stop talking about me like I can’t hear each word you’re saying. That goes for all of you.”
Beaux grinned. There was his girl. She looked pale, and yet she still had spunk.
“Dipshit?” Cyrus snarled. “Who are you talking to?”
“You’re not my Alpha anymore. I’m mated to him.” She motioned toward Beaux with her chin. “Now you’re only my obnoxious brother. I’ll call you whatever I want.”
“Oh, yeah?” Cyrus nodded. “Where’s the bite?”
“Cyrus….” Lake sat up straighter.
“Where’s the fucking bite? You’re not mated. Not really. Not ‘til I see his teeth marks on your fucking neck. Right now, you’re doing what you always do which is to make things harder than they have to be. Healer Prime? We’ll see.”
Before Beaux could think about it, he shoved Cyrus into the wall of the plane.
“You aren’t going to talk to her like that. I don’t care if you’re her brother or not. You speak to her in a disrespectful manner again, I’ll tear out your tongue. I’ll bite her when I want to, and it’s none of your business.”
“Enough.” Lake stood up. “Beaux, let him go. Neither of you can go wolf at thirty-thousand feet. It’s a bad idea. And I was deliberately disrespectful because I’m in a petty mood. Even if he did deserve it.”
Beaux let go of Cyrus in time to see the wolf in the other Alpha’s eyes. Maybe someday they’d finally finish this pseudo-silent war between them, which had started on Lucian’s farm. Maybe they wouldn’t. Whatever was bothering Lake at the moment, he wouldn’t make it worse. Not yet.
He turned to his mate, pulling her into his arms when he did. “You don’t have to apologize to him. He is a dipshit.”
Travis walked past them to sit down in his chair. “The sooner we get this done, the better. I don’t want to spend one more minute with all of you than I need to. My mate, my pack, and my warm bed all beat the shit out of this.”
Beaux nodded. If there weren’t missing children at stake, he’d never choose to spend five more minutes with anyone on the plane except Lake. He’d never thought they needed an Alpha Prime. For good reason, he’d hated Lucian. Right then, he would have loved to have thrown the whole problem off to someone else, someone in charge who could manage the whole mess.
Lake closed her eyes and pressed her face into his chest, another example of how tired she seemed. Above her head, he met Alexei’s gaze. He had no idea what the other Alpha thought, but, when Boston’s leader nodded at him, he couldn’t help the shiver of nerves crossing over his spine. Whatever Alexei contemplated, it wasn’t pleasant. Beaux hoped they could all survive to find out.
The rest of the trip went by without any drama. He avoided Cyrus and the other Alpha seemed to be doing the same for him. When they landed, Alexei departed for Boston with a promise of returning later in the week. Beaux hoped they wouldn’t still be there then. Maybe there would be no ne
ed to have him come back at all.
A wolf could only dream.
He sat next to Lake in a diner in New Jersey. She played with, rather than ate, her hamburger. Travis fiddled with the straw on his diet cola and Cyrus studiously watched the cars fly by from the window. They were all waiting for the owner of the establishment, a werewolf unaffiliated with any pack, to get the time to speak to them.
New Jersey had always remained packless, like Maine and Utah, and this diner had served, he’d been informed, as the unofficial meeting place between Travis and Cyrus during the pack negotiations that had eventually resulted in a treaty between Philadelphia and New York City.
Travis’ mate, Lilliana, had been working here when Travis had found her. She’d been unaware of her latent werewolf status until Lake had healed her.
“If you’re still here during full moon, you’re welcome to come run with my pack.”
Beaux looked up from the grease, which had been all over his fries, to regard the other Alpha.
“Are you extending some kind of olive branch?”
“I don’t want my sister at risk during a run. I understand you have a history of losing mates during full moons.”
Lake’s growl startled whatever he would have said in response out of his mind as she jumped to her feet, knocking her plate over.
“That was nasty and beneath you.”
Cyrus took a loud, deep breath. “Sit down.”
“Apologize.” She pointed at Cyrus. “Right now. You and I both know shit happens during shifts all the time. How dare you throw in his face what has to be the most pain he’ll ever be in for his entire life.”
“Lake.”
Beaux put his arm on her, and, at the same time, pride swelled through his body. They weren’t mated yet. She had to be getting close to it. She’d hollered at her brother in the middle of a diner. She cared about him. One step closer in their mating dance.
“It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay.” Her voice quivered as she sat back down.
“I apologize for bringing up your dead mate. You have to understand, I don’t sugarcoat things when they need to be said. I’ll leave nonsense to the women. They can figure out how to be politically correct werewolves. You should appreciate my candor. Don’t you believe in acting as ourselves and not humans? You lost your mate on a run, and she died. Lake’s been through enough. I’d like to have her on my land, safe, during the full moon, if you’re still here. You can come or shift somewhere else. I really don’t care. Lake comes upstate with me.”