*****
Asaryen watched over Amashanae while she slept. She sat on a sturdy log of tree that Juara had dragged in from the woods, beside a fire he had lit. The flames warmed them soothingly and kept the darkness and the cold of the night at bay. They had made their way into the woods a good distance, and then, finding a suitable clearing, set up a camp. Although Asaryen had been of little help, except for watching over Amashanae as she slept, Juara had managed to get everything sorted despite the throbbing pain in his side. The horses were hitched to a tree a few paces off. Asaryen sat there beside the sleeping elf, trying to comprehend what had actually happened. But try as she might, she could not understand why Amashanae had acted like she had. The dark woods looming over them added to her fear and confusion. Juara was nowhere to be seen, for had left them alone in order to find more firewood. She had stared at the darkness already for hours, and Trahur was nowhere to be seen either. She desperately hoped for Amashanae to wake up and be the strong friend she wanted her to be, but Juara had made her promise not to bother the elf. Eager for her to wake her up, she bent over her still body, looking for clues that she might be waking up, when a rustle of leaves startled her and send chills down her spine.
”I told ye to let her sleep”, Juara said as he stepped into the clearing from between the bushes surrounding the opening in the trees, and into the circle of the light of the fire.
”I didn’t...” started Asaryen, but the words died on her lips as she realized she had indeed been reaching over her. ”I’m sorry.”
”Nah, worry ye not”, Juara said with a kind voice and sat down on the log beside Asaryen after he laid down the wood he had been carrying.
”She seems so peaceful. What do you make of what happened back there”, the girl asked Juara with worry in her eyes and voice.
”I am not quite sure”, the man said, looking at the elf. ”But I am sure she will enlighten us once she wakes up.” He carefully rubbed his aching chin, let out a sigh and grimaced as he felt the broken ribs move slightly. He glanced at Asaryen, meaning to say something about the fight, but his eyes got lost in her eyes, in the moment that originated from her large eyes staring at him in the warm light of the fire. They stared at each other’s eyes, lost in the moment.
“You’re hurt” Asaryen said in a low voice and reached out her hand towards Juara.
“I…” Juara began to say, “I, er, Asaryen, ye have very beutif...”, but he never got to finish the sentence as Amashanae suddenly let out a hoarse cry as waking up from a nightmare. Asaryen also let out a cry and grabbed Juara’s arm tightly.
“Where am I? Where be my sword!” the elf shouted, eyes wide and wild.
“Relax”, Juara said, rushing next to her, resting his hands on her shoulders. “Take it easy, elf, yer sword is safe.”
Asaryen touched Amashanae gently. They both soothed the bewildered, dizzy elf reassuringly, until Asaryen broke the silence.
“What... happened?”
Amashanae stared back at her, not saying anything. Asaryen tilted her head, put her hand on elf’s cheek and asked again: “What were you thinking? You almost kill...”, but she never finished as Juara cut in.
“Amashanae”, he said, grabbing the elf’s shoulders and pushing Asaryen to side, forcing Amashanae to look in his eyes. “You basically lost your mind back there. What was it?”
Asaryen gave Juara an angry look, but said nothing, and finally Amashanae spoke.
“I… I… I do not know… I am sorry.” The elf sighed and looked like she was about to burst in tears. “I am sorry”, she again whispered. Then she asked in a small and scared voice: “The goblins? Did we...beat them?”
”Yes, that indeed we did”, Juara said and stood up. He looked down at Amashanae with a look that could only be described as unfathomable and repeated: “Indeed we did”
Amashanae looked up at the man, her eyes pained and understanding that the man meant more than just the words he had uttered.
“You… you are alright?” she asked, afraid of what she might hear.
Two pairs of eyes gazed at her in silence. Juara lifted his hand on his throat but said nothing.
“I did it again”, she whispered in an almost inaudible voice, at the same time realizing how badly her wrists ached. She rubbed her tender arms and looked at Asaryen with large eyes.
“I did it again.”
“What is it that you did?” the girl asked, even more puzzled and with a tingling of cold fear in her spine, but Amashanae spoke no more and averted her gaze. Juara stepped back and sat down, waving Asaryen to sit down beside him. He gazed at the elf over the flames as Asaryen got up and sat down next to him.
“How did I…” Amashanae asked finally, getting herself up, still rubbing her arms.
“I carried ye here”, Juara explained. He paused for a while, and then continued: “I think we must talk. If you are up to it?”
Amashanae sighed deeply, nodding her head in acceptance. It was time. She sat down beside them and began to tell her tale without further delay, starting from the very beginning. She explained how she had woken up in the woods, not knowing or understanding anything. She told her how she had drifted for days, looking for something, anything, to get her bearings straight. She told how she had studied herself for weeks on end and realized she must be a well-trained fighter. She had the sword…and it was almost like she had been born with it. She had run into trouble with men especially (at which Juara coughed) and she had quickly learned to hide her obviously outstanding features – and the ornate blade she carried – with a hood. She explained about how she kept losing track of time and had blackouts during which she had no idea about what she did, and how she kept waking up in strange places, not knowing how she had gotten there. She spoke of how she did not know why she was apparently deeply hated in many a place (at which Asaryen lifted her eyebrows and glanced at her blood-soaked clothing), and how she had failed to find anybody else even slightly like herself. But she had seen dreams, vivid, colorful dreams, and from those dreams she had gathered tiny puzzles of what and who she was. She knew two names; Hashalia, who she believed to be her sister, and Tahlthar, which was just a name she could not place anywhere. She mentioned neither the voice nor the fact that she knew much more about herself than she cared to show. Act strong and show no remorse or weakness. Finding Tahlthar was what mattered the most to her right now. She needed answers. When she spoke of Tahlthar she stared intently at Juara, who looked as if he had a piece of meat stuck in his throat when he heard the name. Nevertheless she continued, and with a lower voice she explained what she knew about her fighting in desperate situations, and echoes of battle she sometimes saw in the back of her mind but could not quite place at all. All the while Asaryen and Juara listened intently and Asaryen almost burst into tears several times, holding a hand over her mouth, and Juara’s expressions ranging from intense interest to extreme worry. But they did not interrupt her once, and after she had finished pouring out her story, neither uttered a word for a long while. Juara stoked the fire with a mysterious expression and Asaryen looked at Amashanae with tears in her eyes. Then she got up and hugged Amashanae, holding her tight, but this only made the elf even more shaken.
“Oh what must you have been through”, Asaryen sighed with tears welling down her cheeks.
Amashanae, who fought to gain control of herself once again, pushed her back.
“I will survive”
“Amashanae...you do understand that you can trust me?” Asaryen asked, wiping the tears from her eyes.
Amashanae looked at Asaryen, then Juara, who looked back at her with an expecting expression. She felt a cold calculation entering her mind, the weak moment subsiding and fading in her mind. She wanted to be their friend and wrestled with her thoughts. Could the man be trusted…or even her? Juara waited for her answer, clearly somewhat nervous, rubbing her hands. She did not know what he wanted from her. Amashanae was a lone traveler, or at least she had been. This she knew. And no
w she had revealed more than she had ever revealed to anybody else for as long as she could remember. She felt a terrible coldness inside her grow and her hand rose up to touch the amulet on her breast. She fixed her posture, suddenly a strong warrior once again.
”Do not expect me to call you a friend after a few days together”, she finally said, looking at Juara directly in the eye. And with that, it was as if a cold blanket had been thrown over them. ”However, I shall not be asking you to leave no more”, she continued, forcing an expression that might be translated as a smile, as if trying to be thinking positively. That lifted the sudden coldness a little, and Asaryen let out a relieved breath. Juara stared at Amashanae for a moment, then nodded in acceptance and sat down in a more relaxed pose. Asaryen huddled a little closer to the man, as it was cold in the night, and he put his hand over her shoulders. They sat motionless for a good while, watching the flames eat the wood, none of them feeling the slightest need for sleeping even though they were all physically exhausted.
”How many goblins did I kill?” Amashanae broke the silence.
There was another long moment of silence.
“Enough. Quite enough”, Juara finally said, tossing some more twigs into the fire. Amashanae well understood what he meant. She sighed deeply and realized she did feel very relieved that her traveling companions were well. Companions, not friends, she made a mental note. Yet there was a part of her that desperately longed for a chance to call them friends. She remembered little of the battle. They had been almost overrun, and then she had just slipped into a void. What was the matter with her? Why is this happening to me? She felt very tired.
Then Juara spoke again.
”Amashanae...there are many things about yer story that I cannot help ye with”, he got her attention. ”But I do know why have not ye found any others of yer elven kin”. Amashanae’s eyes widened. She got up and came to sit next to the man, and when doing that she almost stumbled, every muscle in her body still aching from the battle. But that mattered little, as there was a chance to learn something about her past - and perhaps future.
”See, as it happens, there are very few and rare elves in these parts of Brodérunn...or any parts for a very long distance from here. It is in this land that there is a certain palace, ruled by an ancient cult...and lead by a sorceress who hates elves more than anything else. Those elves that have not fled to faraway countries and unknown kingdoms she has slain. I cannot claim to know why is it she hates elves so greatly, but I do know that her name Elvenkiller is well earned in blood of yer kin. Indeed it surprises me how separated a life ye must have led in recent times, as this is a story always told and discussed in almost every tavern and every town in Brodérunn…and the cult is feared to a great extent.”
“A-are we safe here”, Asaryen interrupted Juara with a trembling voice, looking around her into the dark forest. “Who knows what terrors this forest hides from our eyes?”
“Ah, worry not”, Juara gave the girl a warm look and put his hand on her thigh, giving it a reassuring squeeze. ”That palace is hundreds of lengths from here. I do believe we are entirely safe here. The goblins we encountered today were an unfortunate and certainly rare occasion in these parts.” He turned his face back to Amashanae. ”Once we reach the city of Kiarra and travel north from there, ye shall meet other elves I am sure. Perhaps they will be able to tell ye more about yer past”
Amashanae’s eyes gleamed like those of a small child. Finally she had heard clues about her past! Finally a thin thread of hope! Finally something that might help her find out about her past. Before she knew it, warm feelings took over her again.
”Thank you, Juara”, she slid down from the log and knelt before the man. He was surprised and stoop up a little more, almost wary. “Thank you. As we enter Kiarra and find Tahlthar…” she paused, looking down at the ground, not seeing how Juara swallowed and trembled a little. “…if we find it….perhaps I can after all call you a friend!”
For a second all three just stayed put, motionless, until Asaryen suddenly darted up and brought her hands together with a slap.
”And now we’ll eat! I could eat a horse!” she exclaimed.
”Hold on”, Amashanae said, remembering that she had feed her horse and vanished into the darkness.
“Why didn’t you tell her she intended to kill you?” Asaryen asked Juara while digging out rations from their bags.
“Shh. She has elven ears. I do not believe it would do her any good. There is something wrong with her” he said as quietly as he could, almost into her ear. “I do not mean to say this in anger or hate, but at the battle...she did not control herself at the battle.”
“Possessed?” asked Asaryen with widening eyes and a glance towards the horses…
“Please Asaryen, quiet...and speak not of it to her. Please.”
Asaryen nodded her head, eyes still open.
“It is not an evil spirit or anything I am sure. But we must take care not to let that happen again. I do not think Amashanae would ever hurt us, but I can not be too sure about the…other.”
“But what is…the other…” Asaryen asked, still puzzled, but had to quiet down as she saw Amashanae returning to the fire.
“Ah, you have the food already. Good, my stomach is screaming for it” she sat on the ground on the other side of the fire, catching a large piece of dried meat Juara tossed at her. And so the travelers ate and drank, with a sweet tiredness slowly taking over them, until they finally fell into sleep by the fire in the small hours of the night. The battle was finally out of their minds – or pushed out – and now was a time to rest.