CHAPTER 04
Wovoka grunted the count out on his crunches keeping pace with the blasting rhythm of Neon Corpse. “One fifty-six, 157, 158, 159…” Each surge forward expelled a small bit of anger that had surfaced at the sight of his brother.
Blood red wolf claw tattoos were visible against his bare chest. They marked him as the leader of his pack, the Alpha. On the wall his micromesh matte black body armor hung, adorned by fourteen small laser-painted red handprints. Each marked the completion of an important tactical victory over the UDA that was recognized personally by Apache Chief Coganthan.
While his features were unmistakably AmerIndian, Wovoka took little stock in the purity of his blood. He was proud to be AmerIndian. He cherished his ancestors but he did not believe it was facial features, perpetually dark skin or long, poker-straight black hair that showed he was true AmerIndian. It was his life.
Wovoka's life, like the lives of most tribal members of the AmerIndian Confederacy, showed him to be a free spirit. Fearless to a fault, honoring what deserved to be honored, no possessions he could not carry on his back, no savings, no debt. Wovoka was bound by nothing but the desire to live in harmony with the spirits of the land. That desire had nearly been expunged from his people from over seven centuries without a Homeland. Wovoka was proud to be an AmerIndian and ashamed to be an AmerIndian without a Homeland.
Underlying all of these ways and beliefs was his loyalty to the AmerIndian Confederacy, his home and the center of his life.
Massive breaker doors rolled open with a hiss and a low groan. Hana walked cautiously into the hot, greasy engine room. Wovoka worked out here because the constant heat pushed his body farther faster. The place was also solitary, visited only when repairs were needed.
Hana was dressed in a gleaming white workout ensemble. It contrasted sharply with her dark oak skin. Her straight, jet black hair was tied back with a small white piece of cloth. The shorts and cropped shirt she wore were tight and looked as brand new as her spotless, white athletic shoes. She indeed looked ready to workout but the outfit stated clearly working out was not her purpose here.
“Hana,” Wovoka stopped and quickly walked over to the mag converter. “Music off,” he said and pulled his shirt on. He was dripping with sweat and the shirt stuck to his chest and abdomen. “I didn't think I would see you until tonight. Did you come to work out with me?”
Hana smiled. “Yes, I thought that might be nice. But first we need to talk, a little.”
Wovoka picked up his towel and laid it on the large converter unit making a place for Hana to sit without getting grease and water on herself. She sat gracefully and patted the mag converter for Wovoka to sit next to her.
“You have been gone too long,” Hana leaned in and kissed Wovoka near his mouth. “Wovoka, I can't tell you how much I missed you,” she took his hand in hers and squeezed. “You know it really doesn't have to be this way, always apart from each other. Wovoka, you could be in a command position within this Diegueño Lodge Ship. My father thinks the world of you. You are very skilled and you are well respected by the chiefs. All it would take is for you to ask and you would be transferred and promoted. We could be together more than three days every two months.”
Wovoka looked directly at Hana and paused. “We have discussed this. That is not my path. I thought you knew that. I will be promoted on merit when Coganthan, my chief, determines I have earned promotion.”
“I do know that,” She paused and looked directly at him. “Wovoka, I am in love with you. Deeply. And your path frightens me. In the past year your pack has been on two-dozen missions. Out of those 365 days we’ve spent twelve together. I saw footage from the Miner's rebellion. By Wambli, it was inhuman. How can you do this job for one more day? Your third Infiltrator, Cavaho… There is something wrong with him. He was covered in blood in the footage. Not his own. You, your pack, are destined to be legend. Either you will continue to conquer every foe as you have for half your life or you will be killed by a hail of laser fire and immortalized by the Apache for your sacrifice. You need to slow down. Live normally. You accept missions for your pack three times more often than the quotas demand. It is too much.”
“Hana, why are you saying these things? You know who I am, what I am. I am a soldier and a leader. Since I am a leader my standards must be higher than those who follow me and who lead me. This is the goal I have set for myself and I believe that I have been honest with you about that.”
“You have been honest. There is a big difference between accepting your philosophy and living it. Wovoka, do you know how much I love you? It's not loneliness. It's an overwhelming desire to be with you. I love you because you are different, driven, passionate. I am beginning to fear you for the same reasons. I fear what you will do to my life. Wovoka, look at me. I am a beautiful, intelligent woman. I could have any man I choose and I pine away for weeks waiting for you to return for a few days. I cannot accept the reality of our relationship. It is unfair to me, Wovoka.”
Lowering his head, Wovoka pulled at the shirt sticking to his chest. “It is not fair to you.” Wovoka stared at the doors for a moment. “You deserve more. You deserve more time, more attention, maybe even more love. I will not give those things to you. You should find a man who will.”
Hana sat motionless. A tear fell from her cheek and for a few moments she was silent. “I should, Wovoka. But I can't. I know my heart and a month with anyone else would not compete with one day with you. I am sorry. Wovoka, I want to hold a star in my hands but I don't want that star to lose any of its power or brilliance.”
She leaned in and wrapped her arms around him, pulled him close and lightly kissed his neck. He could feel each tear fall as she clung to him. He could feel her warmth and he breathed deeply the sweet smell of her perfume mixed with the salty odor of his sweat.
“I love you, Hana…” Wovoka pulled away from her and stood. “Enough not to hurt you any longer.”
A questioning look spread across Hana's face as she wiped tears from her eyes. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you should not have to sacrifice your happiness to be with me for a few days every few weeks. Also, if you actually asked Sequoya if he would pull strings to get me promoted me just so we could be together more you really don't know me at all.” Wovoka stood. “Hana, I risk my life and the lives of my pack every week. You think I would rob another tribal of a promotion so I can have easy duty, so I can spend more time with you?”
Hana sat gaping, stunned. As the only daughter of the chief of the Diegueño tribe she had dealt with more suitors than she could remember. Relationships were a delicate dance of power, a game she had mastered long ago. And never had she been in this position, hearing these words. But she had played this game long enough to know how deep she was now. She had forgotten rule number one of the game, the person who cares the least about a relationship controls it. Wovoka had cared the least from day one and now she had tried to leverage him when she had no power. It had backfired, badly. Painfully, she realized Wovoka's words echoed what she had said to so many others.
“No, Wovoka, this is just a disagreement, a misunderstanding. You don't understand what I mean-”
“I understand exactly what you mean,” he interrupted softly. “I am being selfish. I am putting my work, my goals ahead of our relationship and that is wrong. I won't be willing to give you that kind of relationship for years. The goal I have set for myself will take years to accomplish. I was wrong to think I could give you what you are looking for. I am sorry.”
“Wovoka, you are what I am looking for,” Hana spoke without thinking. As she heard herself say the words she ached. She remembered the men who had valiantly tried to change her mind and failed. She knew the hundreds of thoughts, the dozens of reasons why they should stay together, how she would appreciate and contribute to his goals and dreams, were chaff in the wind now. He was leaving her and there was nothing she could say to change that. Her only chance to be with him again
was the last thing she wanted to do. Be silent and act like this was best. Betray her heart.
“If I was what you wanted you would not have the concerns you have,” Wovoka shook his head and placed his hand on her cheek consolingly. Hana flinched; his gesture was a hard slap. She felt more tears forming.
“Yes, maybe this…” The tears rolled down her cheeks. They were bright and iridescent against her dark skin and flowed slowly down the smooth lines of her face. It struck Wovoka as strange, considering the situation, how utterly beautiful she was. “This is for the best.” Hana turned and walked slowly away, moving faster as the huge breaker doors rolled open. Wovoka watched the doors roll shut behind her and knew she was running when they closed heavily.
Wovoka wondered if he was being fair to her. He had been angry with her when she brought up the same tired issue. Was there really room in his life for her or anyone? How long would it be before he could be part of a healthy relationship where he received and gave love in equal parts?
Wovoka led a top Apache Pack. Accordingly, he was constantly traveling, constantly taking on infiltration missions for the Confederacy. Well, not exactly for the AmerIndian Confederacy. Wovoka stopped himself and thought about whom the missions were actually for. All of Wovoka’s goals, all of his sacrifice revolved around Stone Rain, his father who had been pulled away from him, his mother and his brother thirteen years ago. Killed in the White Earth Massacre with 18,000 other tribals, Stone Rain had left a legacy of service and dedication to the AC that Wovoka now labored to equal. If not for his death, Stone Rain would have become chief of the Apache within a few years. Now Wovoka was gaining the experience and reputation it would take to achieve the goal death had stolen from his father. Along with the legacy Stone Rain had left behind the seeds of conflict between Wovoka and Keokuk.
Like his brother, Keokuk, Wovoka enjoyed his work. Serving the AC, even killing for the AC was not labor a to him. His pack was skilled and their success rate was rivaled only by one other infiltrator pack. Like his father before him, Wovoka knew he could write his pack’s name indelibly into the history of the AmerIndian Confederacy. Jade Dagger would be an integral tool in achieving the AmerIndians’ first and greatest goal, regaining the North American Continent, the Homeland, on Earth.
Wovoka strapped on his sparring gloves. He had been wrong to get involved with Hana. Failing to recognize that fact from the beginning had caused her undue pain. His fault. The thought repeated in his mind and each time he slammed a quick jab into the repulse pad. Again and again and again the repulse pad banged back into its mount and slowly the pain in his arms overwhelmed the pain in his head.