“Just don’t fucking point when you’re holding your drink. I’ll charge more.”
“You two.”
“Sir, are you talking to us?”
“You are the center of this precious fucking world. I want another.”
“Right buddy. You’re shouting. I don’t think so, why don’t you leave them alone?”
“Ignore him. I used to have a woman.”
“I don’t see how-”
“We were in love. Like you. What? You haven’t told each other yet?”
“Sheesh, buddy. You’re done.”
“Stop calling me buddy. Besides. They’re in love.”
“Sir-”
“What do you do?”
“I’m in the Army, and Karen here-”
“You two are in love. Like we were. They say behind every good man, there’s a good woman.”
“You look like you’re about to throw up on my bar.”
“Shut- you- just get me a beer.”
“That’s not gonna happen.”
“Then let me buy a bottle of wine for these two lovebirds here.”
“You’re at the wrong bar.”
“No- no, get them something stronger. Some strong sting to help them remember this time. You are going to lose each other. No matter what. But we weren’t good men or good women back then. Not like you. Say something. Shit.”
“I’m not sure what you want us to say, you’re being very rude.”
“Everybody loses somebody. You can’t call me rude. The only difference-”
“You need to get out of here. You’re ruining the ambiance, bugging this couple on their date.”
“I have something to say. The only difference between me and you is you got someone else’s hand in yours. Fall in love. Get married. Have a family. Lose everything. Build it up to tear it down. I can tell you two will come to a par- a particularly rough end.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
. . .
“I’m sorry- here you two, have this on the house. He comes around a lot, but I never heard him say more than a few words. Won’t even talk about sports. What a weirdo!”
“I think you handled the situation very well.”
“I had to, he was practically falling out of his seat, practically sloshing his drink on you with his crazy hand-waving.”
“To each his own, I suppose.”
“Yeah, you two have a good date, don’t let that nut ruin your evening.”
“We won’t. It all depends on how you look at it.”
“Ain’t that the truth- I don’t know what got into that guy!”