Read Archie the Royal Hot Water Bottle Page 18


  Chapter 18

  It was Prentiss's taste for rough trade that brought her undone. Liking blokes that slapped her about a bit, she frequented places she shouldn't and went about with people she, as a royal protection officer, wasn't allowed to. Her latest bit of leather clad aggro was a friend of Jade's who had introduced her to Jade at the same pub where the Queen's former page had been arrested for possession.

  But Prentiss's Achilles heel had been leading her astray before that fateful day. Before her transfer to the Palace she'd been blackmailing a clerk from the protection office she'd caught with a nose full of cocaine at one of her boyfriend's parties. 

  Being ever the opportunist she'd used the situation to her advantage and arranged for the now terrified snorter to pass over Crystal's schedule every week. The money she made from leaking it to the press had been welcome but kept hidden. Protection officers living a lifestyle they couldn't afford on their salaries quickly came undone. Despite her many lapses of judgment Prentiss was smart enough to save the money and not splash it around.

  Jeff found out all of this during the formal interview. She went to pieces when he pressed her. She told him her boyfriend had arranged the graffiti incident with Black Jack. Jack hadn't told them about Prentiss's boyfriend because he had a reputation for making people disappear if they crossed him. He was arrested as well.

  Getting Trig into the courtyard had taken some planning and the enlistment of Simpson, one of his senior officers, in the scheme. Simpson was remaining silent but Prentiss gave Jeff all he needed to have him charged. 

  The story went that Prentiss slipped a sleeping pill into the third officer's tea. As he slept Simpson let Trig into the courtyard to do the business on the car. When the sleeping beauty woke up, shocked that he'd been asleep on duty, Prentiss told him not to worry, they'd cover for him. Hence the original story that all of them had been awake and alert.

  Simpson had agreed to search Crystal's room because he had a taste for the money Prentiss was beginning to pay him. Oh, it's a fatal mistake to be too greedy. Their avarice meant Prentiss and Simpson would spend a long time in a grimy Victorian prison, in protection of course, because cops don't last long in the general prison population. The clerk was arrested, shaken up and confessed everything.

  Jeff was nearly exhausted by the failures of his team and the extent of the conspiracy but he kept at it. His final mystery to solve was who'd pushed the panic button? Prentiss said only she and Simpson had been in the bedroom. No-one else had been in the bathroom. Jessie confirmed she hadn't been there. No other member of staff was unaccounted for. 

  Jeff stood in the bathroom and looked around. Archie and Terri watched and listened as he talked to Jessie. Lying as always on the marble shelf they wanted to help him but couldn't, he wouldn't hear them if they spoke.

  'Poor bloke,' Terri said, 'It's driving him crazy not knowing.'

  'Well there's nothing we can do about it, he'll just have to keep wondering.'

  'Not necessarily,' Terri said, 'We could ...'

  Archie looked at Terri, at the button and at Jeff who was clearly dumbfounded.

  'All right, but my guess is he'll think it malfunctioned or something.'

  Terri smiled, 'At least he won't be worried any more.'

  They repeated their wriggle and squirm of the day before and, after about thirty seconds and to Jeff's astonishment, two protection officers ran into the room.

  'What do you two want?' he said.

  'The alarm, it went off.'

  The whole thing was put down to a wiring fault. The electricians were called in, everything was replaced and peace descended on the Palace. But a small part of Jeff wasn't sure. He was convinced he'd seen something move on the shelf, but he had to be wrong, the only thing there was a hot water bottle in a cover. Too much stress he decided. 

  He took a couple of days off, got on his bike and took himself to the sea. He rented a boat and went out fishing. He didn't catch anything but he didn't care, there'd been too much catching of late.