Slowly, he lowers his gaze and stares at my lips intensely, prompting me to do the same with his. Are they as soft as they look? I can’t help but wonder what they would feel like on my skin.
“Excuse me. Your food is ready,” the waitress cuts in, breaking the tension filling the small space between us not a moment ago.
“Finally. I’m fucking starving,” Arsen says before digging in, back to his usual self.
I grab my fork and run my fingers along the handle, pretending that the awkward moment from before never happened.
After lunch is over, he walks with me to the curb to wait for a cab. It had started raining while we were in the diner, so as we are making our way to the corner a strong wind passes us by, flipping my umbrella inside out. The sudden pull tugs me forward, causing me to stumble blindly into Arsen who immediately wraps his arms around my waist to stop me from falling.
When I look up, embarrassed beyond recognition, he’s already staring at me with his piercing eyes. I feel the beginning of a blush stain my checks as I hear the loud thumping of my heart.
I wonder if he can hear it.
I would die.
“I haven’t kissed you yet, but I’m already making you weak in the knees?” he teases, tightening his hold on me.
I’m trying to come up with an answer, but my mind is drawing a blank. Instead, I get lost in the warmth of his body so close to mine. His touch feels comfortable and organic as if it belonged there.
“W-what?” I say, swallowing hard.
“However, I think this is where I’m supposed to kiss you,” Arsen says as the tips of our noses touch. In a daze, I observe how he brings his lips closer to mine. As he draws nearer, a voice in the back of my head is shouting at me to move because nothing good can come of this. When I think he’s about to kiss me, I snap out of my reverie and put my arms in between us, ready to use all my strength to push him away, but Arsen surprises me when he aims for my ear instead.
“I’m just messing with you, Catherine,” he whispers before he pulls slightly back, staring at me with laughing eyes.
Relieved because he was teasing me, I begin to push him away and lift a hand to wipe some of the rain off my face. “In your dreams, Arsen,” I joke back.
“Fuck, you’re getting wet. Let me fix that for you.” He lets go of me instantly, grabs my umbrella and fixes it by flipping it back.
“It’s all better.” He holds it above me, shielding me from the rain.
“Um, yes…thank you.”
“Told you. I’m here to save you.”
His statement makes me lift my eyes and stare at him as the rain keeps falling around us. The grin plastered on his face sets me at ease. I’m comfortable with friendly and flirty Arsen.
We’re standing next to each other while he holds the umbrella over me and not him. He’s getting wet, but doesn’t seem to mind. “Are you sure you don’t want to squeeze under here? I think there’s enough room for the two of us.”
“Nah. It’s okay. A little water won’t kill me.” He grins, making his eyes crinkle.
As we stand on the corner of Church Street, the noises of the city come alive all around us. I can smell the smokiness of the wet cement and the exotic spices coming from the gyro stand across the street from us. I don’t think I’ve ever noticed all these smells and noises floating in the air before.
“Would you like to share the cab with me?”
Arsen smiles. “Sure.”
I’m about to discuss a coming assignment when I hear my phone ringing. I take my cellphone out and see Ben’s picture on the screen. “Excuse me for a sec. My husband is calling me, and I need to get this.”
Arsen nods stiffly.
After a quick conversation, I say goodbye to Ben. By the time I turn to look at a soaked Arsen, a cab finally pulls to a stop in front of us.
When Arsen opens the door for me, I get in but he doesn’t follow me.
“Aren’t you coming? I ask, confused.
“No. Actually, I just remembered that I need to run some errands. If you don’t mind, can I borrow your umbrella?”
“Um, okay.”
Leaning inside, Arsen kisses my cheek goodbye taking me by surprise. And I’m further stunned when he whispers in my ear, “Thank you, Catherine. It was a lot of fun. We should do this more often. You know, just you and me. I know I would like to.”
He straightens and shuts the door without saying another word to me.
As the cab pulls into traffic, I turn around so fast I can feel the ends of my hair hitting my face. He’s standing under the pouring rain watching the cab drive away.
Nerves sear through my body, making me feel feverish as I look at the stranger staring back at me in the mirror with eyes that shine brightly.
“Uh, I’m not sure how I feel about this.” I tug at the leather skirt, trying to get it to grow a couple of inches without any luck. Turning to look at Morgan who is sitting down on her bed looking perfect, I rub my hands against one another, the sweat making them stick together. “I feel like I should be working a corner or a pole, Morgan. I mean, if I bend down just a little you can probably see my ass.”
“Are you kidding me? You look gorgeous. Like the new, improved, and sluttified girl next door. Ben is going to lose his mind when he sees you in that outfit.”
Smiling at me, she stands up and makes her way to stand next to me. As she closes the distance between us, I take in her outfit and for a moment wishing I were as tall and as curvy as she is. She’s wearing very tight, shiny black leggings with a fitted Rolling Stones t-shirt, and bright pink stilettos. A female version of Julian, she is stunning.
“Seriously, Cathy. Julian gave me a rundown of what’s going on between you two, and I know this is going to sound immature, but if you want a guy to stake his claim, make him die of jealousy. Look hot and flirt with hot guys, and he will go all cave man on you. I swear it works like a charm.”
I watch her out of the corner of my eye, laughter and disbelief in my voice, “And this has worked for you before, I take?”
“Yep. Always. And let me tell you, the more pissed off you get them, the hotter the make-up sex is after.”
I shake my head and continue staring at my reflection in the mirror. “Okay, I get it. But this isn’t a skirt. It’s more like a scrap of cloth!” I show her the way the skin-tight skirt is hugging my hips. I’m wearing leather glued to my ass, a pretty cream blouse with black lace applications and my black riding boots.
Okay, it actually doesn’t look that bad. But I feel naked.
Morgan laughs, making her blue eyes sparkle. “Well, I think you look super hot in that outfit. You’re not only going to have Ben drooling after you, but probably Julian and some of the other guys too. You have so much to work with, you know? You’re naturally very pretty without any make up, so wait until after I’ve done your eyes and applied some blush. Poor Ben, I already feel bad for him.”
Groaning, I close my eyes and let her play with me like a Barbie doll. I mean she already dressed me and did my hair. Why not let her do my make up? Besides, I have to admit, it’s kind of fun.
While she “beautifies” me, I decide that my outfit is the least of my problems. I need to speak to Ben. So, I let the subject drop and stay in her clothes. The girl staring back at me doesn’t look like girl next door Cathy at all. She is beautiful in an airy, ethereal kind of way. Opening my eyes wide and closing the space between the mirror and myself, I take a real look at myself.
“Wow, Morgan. I love it! I look so different,” I pause, “I look so pretty! Thank you!”
I turn to face her with a big smile on my face. She looks very pleased with herself.
“You’re welcome! But I didn’t do anything really. All I did was bring out your natural beauty. I told you I had a lot to work with. Anyway, stop looking at yourself. It’s you, you hot lil’ piece of ass!”
She giggles as she grabs me by the elbow, walking us to the door. “Oh. MAHHHH. GAWWWD! I cannot wait to see B
en and Julian’s faces when they see you.”
Feeling lots of butterflies in my stomach as we make our way to the main living room, I let fate decide what’s in store for me.
I truly hope that Ben is it.
I feel Julian’s hands circling my waist as we dance to Santeria by Sublime. Could this grinding of bodies even be called dancing? I’m not sure, so I just play along. Julian told me to trust him, so I am. The closeness of our bodies should bother me, I mean, I’d be surprised if you could see a sliver of light between us as we dance, but the brotherly smile on his face reassures me that this is all for show and nothing more.
After Julian scans the room, nodding to people who are trying to catch his attention, his eyes return to watch me, never leaving mine again. Dancing, we get lost in the music and let the beat of the melody guide our every move. When Caress Me Down starts playing, Julian’s hands pull me closer to him as he moves his legs in between mine. Instinctively I wrap my hands around his neck as we sway our hips to the rhythm of the song; our bodies so close that I can feel the heat of his body radiating through his jeans.
Shit.
This feels totally different from the dance before. It’s more intimate. I know it must look worse than it is because we’re attracting a lot of attention. I’m beginning to feel quite uncomfortable with the way we are dancing.
Damn it.
I look around the room as I put some space between our bodies and try to find the reason why I’m here in the first place. I don’t see him anywhere, and I am starting to really freak out now.
Where is Ben?
When I first started dancing with Julian, my gaze landed on an angry pair of brown eyes. Ben was staring at me, unsmiling, but Julian asked me a question, causing me to turn away. After I’d answered him, I glanced over my shoulder, but Ben was no longer staring at me. In fact, he didn’t look my way once after that. When the second or third danced ended, I watched Ben disappear with a gorgeous brunette.
Which brings me to this moment.
Where is he?
Imagining him with her is driving me mad with jealousy. I feel sick to my stomach, but I got myself in this situation, didn’t I? I can see why Ben won’t even come looking for me. Why he’s probably hooking up with someone so much prettier than I am. I feel angry tears pooling in my eyes.
He must be disgusted with me.
I hate this.
I deserve whatever is coming my way. I have no one else to blame but my childish behavior.
Shit.
Without giving it another thought, I decide to go in search of Ben and put a stop to this stupid game. I just hope that Ben believes me and I’m not too late. Turning to look at Julian, guilt flowing out of my pores, I stand on my tip-toes to speak in his ear.
“Julian, I’m sorry. I can’t do this. If all these people already think something is going on between us or is about to happen, I can only imagine what Ben must be thinking. Please, let me just go look for him.”
“Are you sure? I think we’re on the right track. He should be coming to beat the living daylights out of me anytime now.”
I shake my head. “No, Julian. He left with a tall brunette before.”
“What the fuck? I didn’t see him leave,” he exclaims.
“He left about two or three songs ago.” My stomach hurts just thinking about what he could be doing right now.
After a couple seconds, Julian asks, “What did she look like?”
I swallow hard. “A tall brunette, skinny, big boobs, beautiful.”
“Fuck!” he pins me down with his stare.
I think I already know who she is, but I still need him to confirm it. “I-Is that Ashley?” I ask, breathlessly.
Julian clenches his jaw and nods once.
Feeling like the air is knocked out of my lungs, I stare at the dance floor before I meet his gaze once more. “This is enough. I can’t do this anymore.”
“Hey. He’s going to come back. You’ll see.”
I shake my head, “I know it’s just dancing, but I feel sick to my stomach. I don’t want him to get the wrong idea. Please,” I beg, “I just need to go find him and try to explain everything. I just can’t do this. I just can’t.”
Julian immediately lets my body go, a tender expression in his eyes. “It’s okay. Go. Or would you like me to go find him for you? Try to talk some sense in him?”
“No. This is my battle to fight. I got myself in this mess, and I’ve already dragged you deep enough. I’m not sure if I’ll still be here after tomorrow, but truly, thank you for caring and for listening to me. Ben is so lucky to have you as a friend.” I kiss him on the cheek, then turn away from him.
Julian pulls me back. “He’s very lucky. You know, I wasn’t joking about poaching before, but damn if I’m not tempted at this moment. I like you. I hope you both work it out because I have a good feeling about the two of you together.”
Smiling, I nod.
“Cathy…”
“Yes?”
“If things with Ben don’t work out, you know where to find me.” Julian smiles, making his blue eyes sparkle.
Breaking into a laugh, we hug each other one last time before I make my way to find what I hope is forgiveness and my future.
Even if I have to beg on my knees.
For Ben, I would do that and more.
As soon as I’m standing in the empty hallway, I feel a pair of large hands wrap around my waist.
“Mmmhmm…bored with Julian already?”
Ben’s voice sends shivers running down my spine.
“No. You know I’m not interested in anyone but you...” I try to move away from his hold, but he tightens his grasp, making me wince in pain.
“Bullshit. I saw the way you were dancing with him, and the only reason I didn’t beat the shit out of him is because—”
“Stop! Let go of me so I can explain to you what happened.”
When Ben does as I say, I spin around to look at him. He looks raving mad, but he’s here. I throw myself at his chest. I don’t think I can hold him any closer without crawling into his skin. I’m filled with so much love and relief that I don’t immediately notice how his hands are trying to push me away instead of hugging me back.
The minute I realize what this means, I let go of him and turn away as I hear Ben curse under his breath. I want to say that I understand and that I’m okay, but the words get stuck in my throat. I take five or six steps when he grabs me by the elbow and pulls me right back, slamming me against his chest.
“For fuck’s sake, Cathy. Where do you think you’re going?” he asks harshly.
Looking up at his face, I feel the tears running down my cheeks. “I-I’m really sorry. I’ve got to get my suitcase and leave tonight. I’m sorry, Ben. It was my fault.”
Ben shakes his head as the scowl on his face deepens. “Where the hell do you think you’re going?” He groans in frustration. “You know what? Never mind. Don’t answer that question. You have a lot of explaining to do, but not here.”
“But you don’t want me anymore.”
“You must be joking, right? Of course I want you. You’re my girl.”
The music, the people walking in and out of the room, the laughter, the shouting, everything becomes a blur. All I can see is the guy standing in front of me.
Only him.
He’s gritting his teeth so hard that it makes his perfect square jaw even more pronounced. The expression on his face tells me he wants to murder me, but it’s his eyes that hold me enthralled. I see tenderness and possession swirling like a vanilla and chocolate ice cream cone. I see something that I can’t believe.
I see my future.
You are my girl.
With his words bouncing in my head, etching themselves in my soul, I try to close the distance between us, but I don’t get a chance.
Ben’s strong arms are wrapped around me in the blink of an eye. He’s hugging me so tight that I don’t think I can feel my ribs anymore. Nestled in the curv
e of my neck, I can feel the light stubble of his chin tickle my skin as he whispers in my ear, “I need you now, fuck my damn conscience. I can’t take it anymore. I need to be inside you right now. I want you naked beneath me. No more games.”
I feel chills running all over my body as the heat of desire pools in between my legs, and the butterflies of anticipation flutter in my stomach.
Nodding, I close my hand around his as he pulls me in front of him. Fully clothed and in public, he slams his hips into mine.
“I want you,” he whispers in my ear.
I do, too.
As we make our way to our suite on the second floor, we keep stopping to make out against the diamond-paned windows and the paintings hanging on the walls, Ben’s hand under my skirt and inside my panties.
“Fuck, Cat, you’re so wet.”
Ben lifts me up in his arms. Or did I climb him? My hands lock around his neck, and my legs straddle his waist. We groan when our bodies rub against each other intimately. I have a feeling we’re not going to make it to the bed.”
Ben scoops his hands under my ass, lifting me higher and burying his head in my neck. “You’re going to be the death of me.”
Blindly entering the dark room, too busy kissing as we try to rip our clothes off, we walk straight into a piece of furniture. Laughing, the two of us break apart just long enough for Ben to whisper in my ear, “Cathy, babe, we may need the lights on if we don’t want to break every piece of furniture in this room.”
“Mmhhmmm…hurry up. I’m dying here, and I don’t think I can’t wait any longer.”
He flicks the tip of my nose. “My horny little minx.”
I nod my head as he lets go of me because, yes.
That’s not a lie.
I want him.
All of him.
So badly.
When his body untangles from mine, he makes his way in the darkness to the entrance of the room in search of a light switch. I give props to whoever came up with the idea to always place them by the door. Brilliant.
The minute the lights come on, I don’t bother to admire the décor and the lavishness of the suite. All I want to see is Ben. All I see is Ben.