Chapter 7
I was finally getting used to my new life. School was back in session, and my grades were still stellar. My relationship was great with Zack. I forgot about my father trying to rape me, for the most part, and my mother and I were getting along quite well. Grandfather even seemed to be keeping his distance. That is until today.
KNOCK, KNOCK!
I knocked confidently on Grandfather’s office door off of the library. Mr. Bryant informed me that he wished to see me. Demanded is more like it. As I stepped into his office, Grandfather ordered me to shut the door. He seemed furious, though I couldn’t tell why.
“It seems that you have received a few complaints at the hotel,” he informed me.
“That is news to me…” I started.
“Shut your mouth!” Grandfather said before I could say another word. “Mr. Shelley in room #1808 informs me that you entered his room to fix his remote and he caught you going through his closet!”
“No, he’s lying. I went to his room to fix his remote, but while I was up there he hit on me. I politely turned him down, and left,” I explained.
“I have no reason to believe you over Mr. Shelley. He is a long time guest, and a circuit court judge. As far as making a pass at you, it was likely the other way around. You probably tried to take advantage of him like you did Zachary when you first got here.”
I couldn’t believe what he was saying. I didn’t do either of those things. He grabbed me tightly by the upper arm, and threw me up against the wall. “What are you doing?” was all I could say.
“You will learn to leave your dirty ways behind you. You aren’t living with that tramp anymore, so you’ll stop acting like one!” With that, he started whipping my back side with what felt like an umbrella.
I had enough, and pushed him off of me. “Don’t you ever touch me again!” I yelled. “And don’t you ever say another word about my Mom and sister!”
“Who do you think you are, to order me around?” he snorted, with an evil smirk across his face. He threw a bundled stack of papers to my feet, and my heart sank. They were the letters I had written to my Mom and sister. “Yeah, you didn’t think I knew about them, did you? Nothing goes on here or at the hotel that I don’t know about and control,” he eagerly informed me.
“How did you get those? Father was supposed to mail them out…..he promised!” I cried.
“Your father reports to me. He never intended to mail out your precious letters. He was just trying to gain favor with you. If you ever go behind my back again, or try to contact those sluts you refer to as your Mom and sister, I will make their lives more miserable than they already are.” The look in his eyes told me it wasn’t just an idle threat. I stormed out of the office, with the bundled letters to confront my father.
He wasn’t home, so I went to my room and cried. I replayed all of the things I wanted to say to him, when I did see him. Ms. Barker said he would be out all night. I’m not sure what he spent so much time doing, when he didn’t work, that I knew of at least.
CRASH!
I woke up from my sleep to my father tripping over my books. “Shhhh…” he said, softly, with the scent of alcohol on his breath. Before I could let him have it for lying to me, he started blubbering apologies. “I’m sorry, James. I know I’ve failed you. Can you ever forgive me?” I wasn’t sure if he was apologizing for the last time he was in my room or for lying about mailing off my letters. I didn’t have a chance to find out before he continued. “You know, I’ve never loved your mother. Our parents forced us to get married.” Why was he telling me this? “But I love you, James. I really love you,” he slurred. I realized he hadn’t just been drinking, he was stinking drunk. He was petting my hair, and face. It was beginning to frighten me.
He got quiet, so I took the chance to question him about the letters. I wasn’t sure what sort of coherent answers I would get, though, considering his drunken state. “If you love me so much, Father, why did you lie to me about mailing my letters?”
Instead of answering me, he just kept pleading for me to not be mad at him. “Shhhh….James, James. Don’t be mad at me. I’m weak. You know how your Grandfather is, but I love you. I love you so much.” With that, he started to slide his hand between my legs and under the waistband of my underwear.
“What are you doing? Stop it!” I tried to tell him. He didn’t stop though. He covered my mouth with his to silent me and used his other hands to hold me down. I could taste the soured whiskey on his tongue as it darted in and out of my mouth. I kept crying out for him to stop but my cries were muffled. His strong hands found the button and zipper on my pants and quickly pulled my pants down. I was so surprised that I bit his tongue as I tried to scream. He raised his head, and his sorrowful, defeated eyes were replaced with determined eyes full of fire and lust. He backhanded me, and almost knocked me out with the force of his slap. I could taste the trickles of blood coming from my busted lip. He got off of me, and I thought he was going to leave. I got up to pull my pants back up, but he threw me back down over the bed, exposing my bare butt. He shoved a dirty sock in my mouth, and used the other to tie my hands. All this, to spank me, I thought. Then, I heard the sound of his zipper, and I felt like I was going to faint. He was actually going to rape me. The next ten minutes were a blur. I felt more pain than I ever had before. Once he blew his load, he quietly pulled his pants up and left.
I ran for the bathroom, and cried as I sat on the toilet. I was bleeding and the toilet water quickly turned bright red. I tried to pull myself together, and took a long, hot shower. I thought about calling the police, but knew Grandfather probably owned them, as well. Besides that, I was sure I would take the full blame in his eyes. The shower made me feel better, though the soap burned as I washed my rear end.
I decided I needed to forget about my old life and take things day by day. After all, what can happen that I haven’t already been through?