didn’t even order anything. The nice man ordered pretty much everything he could off of the menu. He didn’t eat much himself but seemed to take great pleasure in watching me stuff myself as though I would never eat again after this feast. Maybe that was the honest to God truth.
When I couldn’t eat another bite or drink another cup of coffee the man asked the waitress to bring us a box to go and he put all of the leftovers into the box and placed it in front of me.
“Are you interested in job?” he asked, while pulling out his wallet to pay the bill.
“Most definitely,” I responded. And then I remembered where I had seen him. He had something to do with a homeless shelter a few blocks away. I had seen him working there but not wearing such fancy clothes.
“Do you know the shelter over on Maple and Stanton?”
“Yes, I now remember seeing you there.”
He laughed and said, “Not wearing these clothes you didn’t! I have an appointment with my attorney this morning so I had to get all gussied up. Not used to it and it feels kind of uncomfortable to tell you the truth. How about you come by this afternoon around 2:00 and ask for me.”
“Okay, I’ll be there.”
The gentleman paid for the breakfast and the two of us walked out the door, each turning our separate ways. Then it dawned on me that I didn’t know his name, so I turned and called out, “Who do I ask for? What is your name?”
“It’s Jim,” he called back, as he hurried down the street.
It took me about 3 steps before it finally hit me who Jim was and why he looked so familiar. It wasn’t because of seeing him near the shelter. It was because I had helped him when he was homeless, living out on the street. I quickly turned to say something to him but he was gone. I would later learn that every time I gave Jim the 2 twenties he would take one dollar and buy a Mega Millions lottery ticket. Two days after the last time I saw him he split a $240 million jackpot with a couple from another state. And from that moment on he was a wealthy man, choosing to spend his time helping those he had lived with in the homeless society of which he was a long time member.
I would further learn, to my amazement, that Jim had been looking for me for months and knew exactly who I was when he found me in that alley. He wasn’t on his way to breakfast at all. He was there to find me! Apparently he had memorized my pickup license plate number, and when he received the lottery money and settled into his new life he decided to look me up. He was shocked to learn what had happened to me and it took a while, but he eventually found me. He had engaged an attorney and private detective, eventually someone at his new homeless mission mentioned a man that needed his help. Jim thought the man sounded like me and having learned all about the difficulties I had gone through figured it probably was. Finding me in that alley ended his long search.
Jim did a lot more for me than give me a job in those next few weeks. I guess it is true, what goes around comes around! I am no longer homeless, unemployed or without friends.
Meringue
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It was a terrible morning. I know some days are like that but I certainly didn’t need all these issues, today of all days. But at every turn the constant nuisances kept being flung at me and wouldn’t let up.
First thing in the morning the shower ran out of hot water. I love my hot shower to start the day. Obviously, there was something wrong with the water heater. It usually lasts for all three of us, my wife and daughter too if we all end up taking showers near the same time. But they were still in bed. It didn’t even last long enough for me!
Then I went downstairs to make coffee, and couldn’t find any. Now I know what I forgot to pick up at the grocery store yesterday on the way home from work. I kept thinking there was something else I was supposed to buy, now I remember. It was coffee!
Well, I could stop and get coffee, that wasn’t a big problem. So I decided to leave earlier than normal. When I went out to the garage the garage door opener wouldn’t work. Absolutely nothing was going my way! I pushed the button and nothing happened. So I had to get a ladder, climb up and lean across the back of my somewhat dirty car. I was wearing my nicely pressed dark blue suit which shows everything if I get it dirty. But I was able to reach the latch on the chain mechanism, which would allow me to open the door manually. I got the door open and drove the car out into the driveway. I also pulled my wife’s car out, as well, so she wouldn’t have to deal with any problems regarding the door.
Having done that I then had to close the garage door from the inside and then latch the mechanism back the way it was so no one could just open the door from the outside. After that I had to go through the house and out the front door to get back to the car. I stopped briefly and left a note on the counter for my wife that I had pulled her car out of the garage.
Before I backed out of the driveway, I decided just for the heck of it to try the garage door opener to see if it worked, and wouldn’t you know it, the door opened without a problem! But, unbelievably, it wouldn’t work again to close it! So I had to go through the whole process again. Get the ladder, unlock the latch, close the garage door, relock the latch and go around through the house back to the driveway. What a pain! Nice morning, huh?
As you can see, I was more than a little agitated by the time I backed out into the street and left the house. I am a high powered attorney and that morning I was giving my closing arguments in a case that I had been working on for months. It was all over the media. Reporters packed the courtroom each and every day. I couldn’t afford not to be on top of my game, especially this day.
It was still early and I was already well prepared for court, and I wanted some coffee. I stopped at Ryelands Coffee Shop for some that I knew was extra strong and I also decided to eat a piece of lemon pie. I don’t normally eat anything for breakfast but today pie sounded especially tasty. I sat in a booth off in the corner nursing my hot coffee, trying to get past my annoying episodes of the morning. I don’t know why they were bothering me so much but they certainly were. Maybe I was more on edge regarding the case than I thought. In any event, the stop did me a world of good. By the time I got back in my car, headed for the courthouse, I was a brand new person. The edge was off and I was looking forward to winning this case with my closing statements.
Near the courthouse was jammed with people and cars. I guess a lot more reporters had shown up to listen to the end of the case. I parked a block away and quickly made my way inside through the back entrance, which thankfully wasn’t clogged with reporters. But as I neared the courtroom the halls were crowed and noisy. Unfortunately I was recognized, which began a photo frenzy session. I didn’t answer any questions, but in all truthfulness I didn’t really listen to anything they were asking. All the reporters were laughing as they took their pictures of me making my way down the hall and into the courtroom, and that made it all the less painful dealing with them.
Once inside I took my seat at the prosecutor’s table and spent a few minutes going over my notes for what must have been the thousandth time. Soon the defendant was brought in and court was in session. We all stood when the judge entered. I was called on to begin addressing the jury and when I stood up the judge started smiling. Even she was in a good mood this morning, must not have had any trouble with her garage door. And hopefully that meant she was favoring my case which, if true, might be the same way the jury was leaning. I hoped so! I approached the jury ready to begin, completely confident in my ability to win them over.
The first thing I noticed was that all twelve members of the jury were looking at my suit and not at my face. Maybe I forgot to zip up? Casually, I glanced down to take a peek. And to my horror saw that I had lemon meringue pie, mostly white meringue, smeared all over my expensive suit coat! Not just a little dab, either! It looked like I had taken a whole pie and rubbed it all over myself! It must have been my seatbelt that made it look so bad. I didn’t want to look up and face the jury again. I turned beet red and at first it was so quiet it felt like I was in a ti
me warp or something. And then one of the jurors began to chuckle, then that was followed by another until finally the whole courtroom erupted in uncontrolled laughter when they realized what was going on.
To top it off, I lost the case too. After the distraction and disrupted laughter I was pretty much a basket case, and didn’t sound very convincing in my closing arguments. It was a bad day! Who would have thought it could be destroyed by something as simple as white meringue?
Pumpkins
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It was after dark and I was out collecting them all, at least all I could carry within a reasonable distance from my home. And that was a lot! Some of my neighbors had several sitting around outside their houses.
I didn’t think I was a bad kid. I haven’t done anything really terrible. I don’t write graffiti on walls with spray paint. I don’t shoplift or other mischievous things that some of my friends do. After all, I am only 8 years old. I know right from wrong but for some reason it just didn’t seem like stealing or doing anything bad taking the pumpkins. It seemed more like a prank or joke rather than something people would think criminal. I suppose if I had thought about it I would have realized it wasn’t proper behavior. But really,