Chapter Three
I didn't see Ashley again for four days. I had finished the apartment, except for the treatments on the ceiling I had planned. Sunday morning about a quarter to ten, I was looking over the items stored in the different bays. I looked towards Ashley's house and saw her and my ex-wife strolling towards me. Jean was dressed conservatively in Sunday clothes.
Still she was made up and was as beautiful as only she knew how to be. In contrast, Ashley was in jeans and a loose white shirt. Her hair looked as if the wind had been blowing it and she was without makeup.
"Milo, Mrs. Burgess is here to make sure the apartment is suitable for your children to stay in. I'll leave her with you because I have something that needs doing. Excuse me Mrs. Burgess, and I do thank you for expressing your concern over my husband's death." Ashley turned and went back across the lot leaving me with Jean.
"Hi Milo, how have you been?" I didn't answer. I couldn't until the anger I felt for this woman died down. "Yes, well I can see you still have some resentment for my leaving you for someone else. I can understand that. I'm not here about us though. Let me see where the kids are going to be living."
I went ahead of her up the stairs and let her into the kitchen. Her mouth opened in awe. There had been enough furniture and appliances that still worked in the garage to make a retro kitchen of the 1950's. I didn't let her stop to admire it, although I was pretty damned proud of what I had done. I walked into and across the living room. Again I had salvaged antiques, some nearly two hundred years old. The only exception was a modern sectional collection that divided the room and made it more comfortable and intimate.
"This is where Lindsey and Marie will be sleeping. There is only one bathroom so we will all have to share, but that won't be a problem."
"Where are you sleeping?"
"In the other bedroom and the bathroom is through this door here." I pointed to each. Brassy and nosy, Jean walked into the bathroom and opened all of the storage and medicine cabinets. She then went into my room and opened my armoire and bedside stand, closing them and opened the bureau drawers.
"It looks like you are still sleeping alone, so I don't have to worry about that. Haven't you made a move on your landlady yet? As ugly as she is, she must be dying to get you into her bed. What did Calvin see in her? Oh yes, she has money. Men always go for money."
I was fast getting fed up with Jean and her remarks. "You never used to make comments like that, Jean. Not everyone goes around cheating on their husband," I paused, "like you did."
She looked at me. "You are right Milo, I did do that to you, didn't I? It looks as if you have come out of this okay though. Christ I would kill to be able to live in a place like this and with this address."
"Maybe you sold yourself too cheaply. You never did tell me why you wanted a divorce."
"It was the smell. Every day, seven days a week, you came home smelling of food. I couldn't stand it any longer. I met James and wanted some of the good life so I went for it."
"Is it worth it? Are our children happier? Are you having that much better a life?"
"Not yet, but James promises it will get better."
"What's the problem?"
"The kids. His three are older and won't have anything to do with Lindsey and Marie. They don't have much to do with me either. It is the typical divorced family situation."
"Why haven't you let me see the girls all of this time?"
"Because if you had them, they wouldn't want to come back to live with me. I thought by this time they would forget you. I don't know what is going to happen after you have them for a month."
"You could give me custody, or even joint custody. Have you got a job yet?"
"No, but I am looking. James is finding it difficult to support five kids, so I do need to find some work."
"Is what I am paying for support going for Lindsey and Marie? I don't want any of it used for you or his family."
"Of course it is, all of it."
I doubted it, but didn't challenge her.
Jean changed the subject. "So, how did you end up here with Mrs. Winslip?"
"Ashley came to me and told me about Calvin dying and she saw what dire straits I was in from the divorce settlement. I was offered this place if I would do some handy work for her. I'm paying a pretty high rent, because she is pretty tight with her money.
"But with the kids coming for a month and needing a place for them, it will be fine for the short-term. People here in this neighborhood are a lot different than I am used to. I met a nice old lady from across the street and both she and Ashley have lived here for a long time. The most they have ever spoken was to say hi."
"So this beautiful apartment is just temporary?"
"I would say yes."
"You can't really want custody of the girls then?"
"Yes I do. I have made a lot of friends since you walked out on me, and my prospects aren't all that bad. I have had an offer of $10,000 for the camp. As far as the girls are concerned, if I had full custody, I could give that amount to you."
"That would be like buying your kids."
"No, that would be like solving your problem and gaining custody for me. That way you could concentrate on making your new marriage work."
"It is something to think about. Do you ever see Linda and Patrick? She cut me dead the last time I saw her."
"I lived in their basement until four days ago. I just moved in here myself. You know Linda, she is either hot or cold. I imagine the next time she sees you she will be all over you. If not because she still likes you, but to find out how your new man is, so she can spread the gossip."
"Maybe I better make sure I don't see her. I don't see why everyone is down on me. I just wanted to have a better life for myself."
"No one can blame you for wanting a better life. It is how you went out to get it that bothers people. Tell me, is it that much better?"
Jean looked at me. "Milo I have to be going. Thanks for talking to me. I'll bring the kids over early this Wednesday. I'm sure they will enjoy their stay with you. I envy them."
She didn't answer my question and I think I saw a little regret at how her life was turning out. I watched her walk away, not disappointed that she was now someone else's wife.
I went over to the big house to see if Ashley would pay me for six days work. I was flat broke and needed money for food. Per our agreement, I had my figures in hand when I knocked on her back door. She was a little pale.
"Hi Ashley, not feeling well? I can come back later if you prefer."
"No, come in. I was coming over to see you. You must want your pay for this week."
"Yes, that is why I'm here. I have the figures with me. First of all, I have written checks for $2,337.54 for supplies and material from the account you set up for me to draw against." I handed her an itemized list. "You worked for me one day and I decided you were worth $20 an hour and we worked twelve hours, so if you would pay yourself $240.00 that would take care of that item. When Pat and Linda came over to help, she noticed a hall tree in the garage. I would like to buy it from you and the middle ground estimate is $125.00. I would like to have that deducted from my pay, if you are agreeable." I waited for an answer.
"Why something for Linda?"
"She took me into their home and made me welcome when I had no place to go. I would like to give her a gift and I know she would like that."
"Okay, that seems a fair price. Now how many hours have you worked? We agreed you would work for carpenters' rates, right?"
"That's right. They make about $25.00 an hour give or take a little. That is fine with me."
"Well I don't know where you got that figure. It is not high enough. Union scale is over $40.00 an hour. You aren't union so I'm going to split the difference. I'm paying you $32.50 an hour." I started to object.
"Don't say it Milo. Before we go any further, I want to confess I snuck into y
our apartment and took pictures. I took them to an appraiser and described what you had done to redo the apartment. He says the job done by professionals would have cost over $35,000. Workers would also have wanted it tied up for at least a month. He also said if I paid a renovator that amount, I would still be ahead because I increased the value of my property close to $50,000. So, we won't argue about what I am paying you will we?" Her reasoning was irrefutable.
"So if we start with 77 hours at $32.50, that comes out to $2,502.50. We deduct $500.00 for rent and deduct $125.00 for the hall tree, I can make out a check for $1,877.50. Does that sound about right?"
"No, first of all, I agreed to pay you half of what I earned for rent. So we are starting from $1,251.25 and deduct $125.00, I will let you make out a check for $1,126.25."
"Milo listen, some weeks you won't be working 77 hours. What happens if you only work 32 hours? I will still want my rent. $500.00 a week for this apartment in this area is good rent. That is $26,000 a year for something that I wasn't using. Please don't argue and hurt my feelings."
"Can't you work up a few tears? I'm a sucker for tears."
"Did I win?"
"Yes, damn it, you win and I love? " I didn't finish my thought.
"You almost said something you didn't mean."
"Ash Baby, I love what you are doing for me. That is what I meant. If I ever tell someone I love them, I want it understood it isn't that they are doing something for me, it will be because I truly love them."
"So it was just an expression?"
"For now it is. Before we get done here, I have a confession to make. I didn't want Jean to know much about our relationship. I didn't tell her that you and I worked on the apartment together. In fact I said you were charging very high rent and that you were tight with your money. Also I said this was just temporary until the girls leave.
"Another thing, she asked if there was anything sexual going on between us. I changed the subject and had a conversation about the girls and custody. I made her an offer. I said I would sell my camp as I already had an offer of $10,000. I would turn that over to her if she would give me custody. She didn't turn it down, so I'm hoping maybe I'll get my kids back.
"I don't know this husband of hers, but I suspect the shine has worn off and my two girls are much of his problem."
"I know her husband. He is on the low end of the food chain as far as lawyers are concerned. He doesn't have too big a practice and he isn't too well thought of in court. He was suspected of manufacturing some evidence once, but it couldn't be proven so he got away with it. The stigma remains. She must have seen the title of Attorney and not the man behind it to take up with him. I can almost feel sorry for her."
"I don't. I can almost feel sorry for him. If he doesn't pan out, I know she will dump him just like she did me. That is why I want custody of Lindsey and Marie so strongly. I want them to grow up in a strong and stable home."
"I'll help in any way I can."
"Good. Now I know you just gave me a check, but may I borrow a couple hundred dollars? I'd like to take you out to dinner tonight. This isn't a date, date. This would be two people going out to eat. You know to kind of cement our friendship."
"I'd love to."
Over dinner I told Ashley I had questioned Jean about why she had left me. She said it was because I smelled of food. Of course I smelled of food, I owned a fast food establishment. For some reason this hit Ashley as being humorous. "She left you because of that? Wow, she is a shallow person. She is extraordinarily beautiful though."
"Yes she is. Since she left I've thought about that. She is like a beautifully wrapped package. The thing is, when you take the wrapping off and open the package, it is half empty and what is left is rotten."
"That is quite an analogy. I'm curious, how do you see me?"
"Umm, let me think a minute how to put this. Promise you won't take it the wrong way if I tell you?"
"No. You tell me what you think. I'm sure whatever it is will be the truth. Not many tell the truth because they are afraid of hurting the other person."
"Ashley, why do you think what I'm going to say will hurt? Trust me, I wouldn't hurt you for the world."
"Okay, I trust you."
"Good. Using the same analogy as I did with Jean, I see you as a much bigger package. You are wrapped in many layers of paper. The outside is plain, but the paper is of a fine quality. That is the first wrapping. The next one has some design to it, paisley, I think. I like paisley and the paper is of a still finer quality. Oops, this one isn't so good and it is very fragile. We will have to discard that one because it is too dark. Ah, the next one. I love this one for this one isn't paper at all. This is of the finest wool cloth, soft, flexible, and warm.
"And oh good, we have a box and it is made of beautiful mahogany. Let's see what is inside. Umm, silk and lace with a lavender scent. Oh and here are some nuggets in the corner. Let's see what they say. This one says faithful and this one says integrity. Here is a nugget that is emblazoned with generous. There are a few more that I'll leave until I dare open the box all the way."
Ashley was smiling when I finished. "Burns is Irish isn't it? And blarney is Irish. To shorten it I could say, Burns is blarney."
"Do you want it to be blarney or are you hoping it isn't?"
"I'm hoping it isn't. What was the fragile wrapping you threw away?"
"Oh, that one had bad inscriptions all over it. It had lonely, fear, insecurity, worry, sorrow, you know, stuff to make a person unhappy. It is gone now, thank god. I threw it away."
"You're sweet you know."
"Enough blarney. I have a question. Have you been seeing a doctor about your pregnancy? I noticed that your jeans are beginning to get tight. Your body is going to change dramatically from now on and you haven't mentioned the baby much. It seems as though I am the only one to talk about it."
"Milo, I haven't told anyone yet. Frankly I'm scared. I don't have anyone to turn to or ask questions of. I have been to the doctor and he tells me I'm healthy, so I don't worry about that. I miss Calvin. We did want a family and now he is gone and I'm all alone. Don't worry, I don't think about doing what I almost did and I'm glad you were there to stop me. I just don't have anyone."
"I suspected that might be the problem. Don't worry about it. You'll be fine. Someone will come along whom you can depend on, and when someone does, don't shut them out. You have been used to being alone for so long, it is hard to open up I know, but once you do, it will get easier.
"Change of subject again. If Jean comes through and Lindsey and Marie get here as promised, would you go up to the cabin with us? It won't be a full moon like it was two weeks ago, but we can sit and watch the stars come out."
"Oh yes, that would be so much fun. Of course I will go. Can we have cold cereal and bacon and fried eggs to eat? I'm always going to associate those with the cabin."
As I stood at Ashley's door later, she said, "Milo I know what you are trying to do. You are so easy to see through. You are afraid I will do myself in so you are making life interesting enough so I won't."
"No Ash Baby, you have it all wrong. Calvin gave you his baby and can't be here to protect it and you. I'm standing in for him. Why? Because he was like a brother to me. You miss him, but no more than I do. I think he picked someone fine for a wife, someone he loved. I want to make sure his baby gets a great start in life.
"In the meantime I have found that I enjoy being around you and I want to help. I knew the minute you didn't kill yourself when I gave you the opportunity that part was behind you. Now to go on living is the difficult part. I want to make it as easy for you as I can. Now tonight, I'm asking for one of those hugs ? you know friend to friend."