"Linda?"
He shook his head. "Sorry. That one threw a shoe at me."
Lexie studied him carefully. "How many women have you dated in the last ten years?"
"I have no idea. Why?"
"Because I'm getting the sense that you've dated just about every name out there."
"No, that's not true."
"Name one, then."
Jeremy thought about it. "Gertrude. I can honestly say I've never dated a woman named Gertrude."
After rolling her eyes, Lexie held up the outfit again, examined it once more, then set it aside before reaching for another. Only ten zillion more outfits to go, Jeremy thought. At this rate, we should be leaving the store right about the same time the baby is born.
She held up a new outfit before glancing at him. "Hmm..."
"Hmm what?"
"Gertrude, huh? I had an aunt named Gertrude, and she was just about the sweetest lady you've ever met." She seemed to be conjuring up the memory. "Now that I think about it, there might be something there. I'll have to consider that."
"Wait," Jeremy said, trying and failing to imagine calling any infant Gertrude, "you're not serious."
"We could call her Gertie for short. Or Trudy."
Jeremy stood up. "No," he said. "I can put up with a lot of things, but we are not going to name our baby Gertrude. I'm putting my foot down here. As the father, I think I have some say in this, and we're not naming our daughter Gertrude. You asked for a name that I hadn't dated."
"Fine," she said, putting down the outfit, "I was just teasing, anyway. I never liked that name." She walked toward him and slipped her arms around his neck. "Tell you what--why don't you let me make it up to you for dragging you around today. Maybe a nice romantic dinner at my place? With candles and wine... well, for you, anyway. And maybe after dinner, we'll figure out something else to do."
Only Lexie could make a day like today suddenly seem worth it, he realized. "I think I can come up with something."
"I can't wait to hear all about it."
"I may have to show you."
"Even better," she teased, but when she leaned in to kiss him, her cell phone suddenly chimed to life. The mood broken, she pulled back and fumbled through her purse for the phone and answered on the third ring.
"Hello?" she said, and though she didn't say anything else right away, Jeremy suddenly knew that something was wrong.
An hour later, after checking out and quickly loading the car, they were sitting at a table at Herbs across from Doris. Though they'd already gone over it, Doris had been talking so fast that Jeremy had trouble keeping up.
"Let's start from the beginning," he said, raising his hands.
Doris took a long breath. "I just can't explain it," she said. "I mean, I know Rachel can be flighty, but never like this. She was supposed to work today. And no one knows where she's gone."
"What about Rodney?" Jeremy asked.
"He's as upset as I am. He's been looking for her all day. So have her parents. It just isn't like her to vanish without telling anyone where she's going. What if something happened to her?"
Doris looked as if she were about to cry. Rachel had worked at the restaurant for a dozen years and had been friends with Lexie before that; Jeremy knew that Doris regarded her as family.
"I'm sure there's nothing to worry about. Maybe she just needed a break and headed out of town."
"Without telling anyone? Without bothering to call and tell me that she wasn't going to show up? Without talking to Rodney?"
"What did Rodney say, exactly? Did they have an argument, or...?" Jeremy finally asked.
Doris shook her head. "He didn't say anything. He came in this morning and asked if Rachel was around, and when I told him she hadn't come in yet, he took a seat to wait for her. When she didn't show, he decided to swing by her house. The next thing I knew, he was back here, asking if she was in yet since she wasn't at home."
"Was he angry?" Lexie asked, finally joining the conversation.
"No," Doris said, reaching for a napkin. "He was upset, but he didn't seem angry."
Lexie nodded but said nothing else. In the silence, Jeremy shifted in his seat. "And she hadn't stopped anywhere else? Like at her parents'?"
Doris worked the napkin in her hand, wringing it like a washrag. "Rodney didn't say, but you know how he is. I know he didn't stop after swinging by her house. He probably looked everywhere for her."
"And her car was gone, too?" Jeremy pressed.
Doris nodded. "That's why I'm so worried. What if something happened to her? What if someone took her?"
"You mean abducted her?"
"What else could I mean? Even if she wanted to leave, where would she go? She grew up here, her family's here, her friends are here. I've never even heard her talk about someone from Raleigh or Norfolk, or anywhere else, for that matter. She's not the type to just up and leave without telling anyone where she's going."
Jeremy said nothing. He glanced at Lexie, and though it appeared that she was listening, her gaze was unfocused, as if she were occupied by other thoughts.
"How have Rachel and Rodney been getting along?" Jeremy asked. "You mentioned that they were having some trouble before."
"What does that have to do with anything?" Doris asked. "Rodney's more worried than I am. He didn't have anything to do with this."
"I'm not saying he did. I was just trying to figure out why she might have left."
Doris eyed him, her expression unwavering. "I know what you're thinking, Jeremy. It's easy to blame Rodney, to think that he did something or said something that drove Rachel away. But that's not it. Rodney had nothing to do with this. Whatever happened has to do with Rachel. Or someone else. Leave Rodney out of it. Something happened to Rachel. Or Rachel took off. It's that simple."
Her voice brooked no argument about the matter. "I'm just trying to figure out what's going on," he reasoned.
At his words, Doris's tone softened. "I know you are," she said, "and I know there's probably nothing to worry about, but... but this is wrong somehow. Unless there's something I don't know about, Rachel just wouldn't do this."
"Has Rodney put out an APB?" Jeremy asked.
"I don't know," Doris said. "All I know is he's out looking for her now. He promised to keep me informed, but I've got a bad feeling about this. I just know that something terrible is going to happen, if it hasn't already." She paused. "And I think it has something to do with you two."
When she finished, Jeremy knew she was talking less about her feelings than her instincts. Though she readily claimed to be a diviner and someone who could predict the sex of babies before birth, she'd been less willing to claim clairvoyance regarding other matters. Nonetheless, her words left Jeremy with no doubt that she believed she was right. Rachel's disappearance was somehow going to affect them all.
"I don't understand what you're trying to tell us," he said.
Doris sighed and stood up, tossing the crumpled napkin on the table. "I don't know, either," she said, turning toward the windows. "I can't make sense of it. Rachel's gone and I know I should be worried about that, and I am... but there's something else about this... something I can't make sense of. All I know is that none of this should have happened, and that--"
"Something bad is going to happen," Lexie finished.
Both Doris and Jeremy turned toward her. Lexie sounded as convinced as Doris, but more than that, a note of understanding underscored her pronouncement, as if she knew exactly what it was that Doris had trouble formulating. Jeremy felt again like an outsider.
Doris said nothing; she didn't have to. Whatever wavelength the two of them were sharing, whatever information passed between them, was incomprehensible to him. All at once, Jeremy was sure that each of them could be more specific if she wanted to be, but for some reason both had decided to keep him in the dark. Just as Lexie had kept him in the dark about that afternoon on the bench with Rodney.
As if on cue, Lexie reached across the
table and rested her hand on Jeremy's. "Maybe I should stay with Doris for a while."
Jeremy pulled his hand back. Doris remained silent.
He nodded and rose from the table, again feeling like a stranger. He tried to convince himself that Lexie simply wanted to stay and comfort Doris, and he forced a smile. "Yeah, I think that's a good idea."
"I'm sure that Rachel's fine," Alvin's voice boomed out of the cell phone. "She's a big girl, and I'm sure she knows what she's doing."
After leaving Herbs, Jeremy had swung by Lexie's and dropped off the baby items. He debated whether or not to wait for her there, then decided to head off to Greenleaf. Not to write, but to talk to Alvin. Despite himself, he was beginning to wonder how well he really knew Lexie. To his mind, she'd seemed more concerned about Rodney than she had about Rachel, and he wondered again what Rachel's sudden departure meant.
"I know, but it is strange, don't you think? I mean, you met her. Did she strike you as the type who would just up and leave without telling anyone?"
"Who knows," Alvin said. "But it probably has something to do with Rodney."
"What makes you say that?"
"She's dating him, isn't she? I don't know, maybe they had a fight. Maybe she thinks he's still hung up on Lexie or something like that and just wanted to get away to clear her mind for a few days. The same way Lexie did when she bolted off to the coast."
Jeremy took that in, remembering his experience with Lexie, wondering if it was some sort of southern woman thing.
"Could be," he said. "But Rodney didn't say anything to Doris."
"So Doris says. You don't know that for sure. Maybe that's what Lexie and Doris are talking about now, and it's the reason they wanted to be alone. Maybe Doris is as worried about Rodney as she is about Rachel."
Jeremy said nothing, wondering whether his friend was right. When Jeremy remained quiet, Alvin added, "Then again, it probably doesn't mean anything. It'll all work out, I'm sure."
"Yeah," Jeremy said. "You're probably right."
Jeremy could hear Alvin breathing into the line.
"What's really going on?" Alvin asked.
"What do you mean?"
"You... all this. Every time I talk to you, you seem more depressed."
"Just busy," Jeremy said, falling back on his standard answer. "There's a lot going on."
"Yeah, so you've told me. The repairs are bleeding you dry, you're getting married, you're going to have a baby. But you've been under pressure before, and you've got to admit your life isn't as stressful as when you and Maria were getting divorced. But unlike now, then you still had a sense of humor."
"I still have a sense of humor. If I wasn't able to laugh at this stuff, I'd probably curl up in a little ball and mumble nonsense all day long."
"Are you writing yet?"
"Nope."
"Any ideas?"
"Nope."
"Maybe you should work naked and have Jed hold your clothes for you while you work."
For the first time, Jeremy laughed. "Oh, that would work well. I'm sure Jed would just love that."
"And the upside is, you know he wouldn't tell anyone. Since he doesn't talk, I mean."
"No, he talks."
"He does?"
"According to Lexie, he does. He just doesn't talk to me or you."
Alvin laughed. "You getting used to all the crazy animals in your room yet?"
Jeremy realized he barely noticed them anymore. "Believe it or not, I am."
"I don't know whether that's a good thing or a bad thing."
"To be honest, neither do I."
"Well, listen, I've got someone here, and I'm not being a good host, so I should let you go. Give me a call later this weekend. Or I'll call you."
"Sounds good," Jeremy said, and a moment later he hung up the phone. Staring at the computer, he shook his head. Maybe tomorrow, he thought. Just as he was rising from his desk, the phone rang again. Expecting Alvin had forgotten to tell him something, he answered, "Yeah?"
"Hey, Jeremy," Lexie said. "That's a funny way to answer the phone."
"Sorry. I just hung up with Alvin and thought he was calling back. What's up?"
"I hate to do this to you, but I'm going to have to cancel our dinner tonight. Let's do it tomorrow, okay?"
"Why?"
"Oh, it's Doris. We're heading to her place, but she's still upset and I should probably stay for a while."
"Do you want me to come by? I can bring some dinner with me."
"No, that's okay. Doris has plenty of food, and to be honest, I don't know if she's in the mood to eat. But with her heart troubles, I'd just feel better if I made sure she was okay."
"All right," Jeremy said, "I understand."
"Are you sure? I feel bad about this."
"Really, it's okay."
"I promise to make it up to you, though. Tomorrow. Maybe I'll even wear something skimpy while I cook dinner for you."
Despite his disappointment, Jeremy kept his voice steady. "Sounds good."
"I'll give you a call later, okay?"
"Sure."
"I love you. You know that, right?"
"Yeah," Jeremy said, "I know."
Lexie was quiet on the other end, and it was only after hanging up that Jeremy realized he hadn't said the words in return.
Does trust have to be earned? Or is it simply a matter of faith?
Hours later, Jeremy still wasn't sure. No matter how many times he went over the questions, he wasn't sure what to do. Should he stay at Greenleaf? Head to Lexie's to wait for her? Or check to see if she was really at Doris's?
That's what it came down to, he thought. Was she really there? He supposed he could come up with some sort of plausible excuse and call Doris to find out, but wouldn't that mean he didn't trust her? And if so, why on earth were they getting married?
Because you love her, an inner voice answered.
And he did, he admitted, but alone in his quiet room at Greenleaf, he couldn't help but wonder whether or not it was blind love. In the years he'd been married to Maria, he'd never once been suspicious of her whereabouts, even toward the end of their relationship. He'd never called over to her parents to check to see if she was really there, seldom called her at work, and only rarely popped in unexpectedly. She'd never given him a reason to question her about anything, and for the life of him, he couldn't remember even considering it. But what did that mean when it came to him and Lexie?
It seemed as if he had two views of her--one in which they spent time together and he chided himself for his paranoia; the other when they were apart and he allowed his imagination to run wild.
But it wasn't completely wild now, was it? He had seen Lexie and Rodney holding hands. When asked directly what she'd done that day, she hadn't mentioned even seeing him. He had received a strange e-mail, one from someone who'd taken great pains to hide who he or she was. And when Doris was talking about Rachel, Lexie's only question had been whether or not Rodney seemed angry.
On the other hand, if she did have feelings for Rodney, why not just admit them? Why agree to marry Jeremy? Why buy a house and go shopping for the baby and spend almost every evening with Jeremy? Because of the baby? Lexie was traditional, Jeremy knew, but she didn't have a 1950s mind-set. She'd lived with a boyfriend in New York, had a passionate fling with Mr. Renaissance... she wasn't the type to throw away a life with the man she truly loved--assuming it was Rodney--for the sake of a baby. Which meant, of course, that she loved Jeremy, just as she'd told him on the phone. Just as she told him every time they were together. Just as she whispered when they were entwined in each other's arms.
There was no reason not to believe her, he decided. None at all. She was his fiancee, and if she said she was at Doris's, then that's where she was. End of story, except for one thing: He somehow doubted she was there.
Outside, the sky had turned to black, and from his seat he could see the limbs of trees swaying gently in the breeze. New spring leaves covered the once b
arren branches, and they glowed silver in the light of the crescent moon.
He should stay here and wait for her call, he thought. They were getting married, and he trusted her. How many times since seeing Lexie and Rodney together had he checked on her, only to feel foolish when he spotted her car at the library? Half a dozen? A dozen? Why would tonight be any different?
It wouldn't be, he told himself, even as he reached for his keys. Like a moth drawn to light, he seemed to have no other choice, and he continued to chide himself as he slipped out the door and crawled behind the wheel of his car.
The night was quiet and dark; downtown was deserted, and in the shadows, Herbs seemed oddly forbidding. He passed by without slowing and headed toward Doris's, knowing that he'd find her there. When he saw Doris's car parked in the driveway, he sighed, feeling a strange mixture of relief and regret. Until that instant, he'd forgotten that he'd simply left Lexie at Herbs without a car in which to get around, and he nearly laughed aloud.
Okay, he thought, that was settled, and he began making his way to Lexie's, thinking he would wait for her there. When she got home, he'd be supportive and quiet, listen to her worries, and make her a cup of hot chocolate if she wanted one. He'd made way too much out of nothing.
Yet when he turned onto Lexie's street and saw her house up the block, he found himself feeling instinctively for the brake pedal. Slowing the car and leaning nearer to the windshield, he blinked to make sure he was seeing things right, then suddenly squeezed the steering wheel hard.
Her car wasn't in the drive, nor were the lights on. He slammed on the brakes and turned his car around, not caring about the screech that sounded from his tires. After gunning the engine and careening around the corner, he sped through town, knowing exactly where she was. If she was not at the library or Greenleaf, not at Doris's or Herbs, there was only one place she could be.
And he was right, for when he pulled onto the street where Rodney Harper lived, he saw her car parked in the drive.
Eight
Jeremy waited on the porch at Lexie's house.
He had the key, he could have gone inside, but he didn't want to. He wanted to sit on the step outside. Or, rather, seethe on the step outside. It was one thing to talk to Rodney, it was completely another to lie about it. And she had lied. She'd broken their dinner date, she'd called him on the phone and lied about her whereabouts. Lied to him directly.