“I don’t think I can handle this,” I told Fred as I paced around the house with a huge bottle and a whimpering baby elephant.
I was covered in milk and less-attractive fluids and the baby mastodon hadn’t even downed half a bottle. Already she was looking weak and sickly.
“Drink,” I coaxed her. “Please, little girl. You can’t give up. A whole species depends on you to grow up and reproduce!”
Yeah, I needed to work on my pep-talks.
The little one clutched a tuft of fur in her trunk. She held it against her cheek like a toddler would their blankie.
She missed her mama.
I was a sorry substitute.
I slumped back into my rather lumpy easy chair and rocked her back and forth. What was that song Mom used to sing to the twins?
Hush, hush, time to be sleeping
Hush, hush, dreams come a-creeping
Dreams of peace and of freedom
So smile in your sleep, little baby
The little pink elephant seemed to like the sound of the song. I stuck the bottle into her mouth the second her jaw unclamped and squeezed a little of the warm milk onto her tongue.
She may have actually swallowed instead of spitting it out. There was no way I was going to stop singing now.
Eat, eat, eat little mastodon
eat, eat, soon it will be dawn
drink your bottle until its gone
I will protect you, sweet baby
The little elephant’s huge brilliant blue eyes stared up at me.
“You’re like a little flower,” I decided. “I’m going to call you... Petunia.”
“Aw,” said a decidedly unfriendly voice behind me. “How cute and snuggly we are!”
I whirled around to see three sets of eyes staring down at me.
“I really hate being called cute,” I said conversationally, wishing I had my sword within reach instead of across the room on the table. “You must be the poachers. How did you find me?”
The leader held up a familiar and well-folded piece of manuscript.
“Now it decides to be helpful?” I muttered.
Betrayed by my own map.
I caught Fred’s eye from where he was perched on top of my bookshelf. Either the men hadn’t seen him when they arrived, or they had assumed he was a stuffed bird.
“I could use a little help,” I told him.
Freakin’ rooster just disappeared.
“Onions,” I muttered. “If I survive this I’m going to be showering that chicken with onions.”
“Not to interrupt your soliloquy,” the leader said, “but we’ll take that little mastodon calf now.”
“Not a chance,” I snapped, tightening my hold on the little bundle in my arms. “I just barely got her eating. Do you think I’m just going to hand her over to you?”
The leader blinked. “Yes, actually I do.” He shook his head. “What’s a cute little thing like you going to do to stop us?”
I ground my teeth. “I really hate the term ‘cute’,” I told them. “It’s belittling.”
“Little,” one of the guys, the one with the yellow teeth, snorted.
I narrowed my eyes at him and he looked at the ground.
“Take it,” the leader said.
“Stupid move,” I told him.
Clutching the baby bundle in one arm I made a dive for my table and my sword. My fingers closed on the blade just as one of the men grabbed my ankle.
I kicked hard.
Yellow-teeth yelped.
I whipped myself around, pointing my sword towards all three men. “Don’t make me mad,” I warned them.
“Aw,” the leader said, “she’s like a tiny little kitten. Maybe we should keep her... as a pet.”
I glared at him.
I tapped into my powers. I could hear the earth magic thrumming below me, several stories down. It felt like it wanted to be called, as if the earth itself were angry with these poachers-- these men who had violated her and killed her precious ones.
I just opened myself up as a conduit for its rage. Power roared through me, lashing around the three poachers.
It was echoed by another roar.
The last thing I remembered was the leader screaming as a giant bear appeared from nowhere and ripped his head off.
I awoke in my armchair and immediately sat up, looking for my little elephant.
“She’s here,” said a soothing voice. Big hands pushed the little bundle towards me.
A tiny pink trunk reached out of the blanket and wrapped itself around my ponytail.
I looked down at Petunia with a tender smile. Her beautiful blue eyes stared trustingly up into mine.
“Looks like you’ve been adopted,” said the strange man kneeling beside me.
I frowned. “I’m sorry, but... Who are you?”
He smiled. “I’m Braun... Braun Baehr.”
“Your zombie chicken came for us,” added another voice. I looked up to see the familiar face of Kodi Baehr behind his brother. There was another man next to him, who I assumed was the third brother.
“Fred?” I asked, incredulously.
My zombie chicken sat sullenly in the middle of the kitchen table.
“He was actually... useful?” I demanded. “Isn’t that against the zombie code... or the chicken code or something?”
Braun chuckled.
“I owe you,” I told the rooster. “I’m going to take you to the butcher shop and get you anything you want... as long as it isn’t chicken!”
“You never stop talking, do you?” Kodi said with a grin.
I grinned back. I was too relieved to be alive to even care that grinning made me appear even cuter than usual. “Nope,” I admitted. “When you’re my size, talking is the best offense.”
“As in, ‘the best defense is a good offense’?” Kodi teased.
My opinion of him rose considerably at that comment.
“So, what happened here?” I asked. “Since I apparently passed out.”
“When we got here,” Braun answered, “You had all three men bound up with earth magic so tightly they were being squeezed to death.”
“Remind me never to made you mad,” Kodi muttered.
“We had little choice, but to... put them out of their misery,” the third man said.
“They were known criminals, Paul,” Braun said over his shoulder to his brother. “I doubt the Council of Magic will take issue with us taking justice into our own hands.”
“Paws,” Kodi corrected cheerfully.
“Paws?” I closed my eyes against the memory of the huge bear. “You guys are... werebears?”
“She’s sharp,” Braun said in appreciation.
“Well,” I said. “Thanks for coming to my rescue.”
“Unnecessarily,” said the man Braun had called Paul.
The little elephant in my arms started to wiggle. I grabbed her bottle from Braun and stuffed it into her mouth.
I grinned with relief as she started to suck milk down.
Now we were getting somewhere.
“I’m impressed,” Braun said, “with how you handled yourself and your dedication to magical wildlife.”
“This was personal,” I said, trying not to look at a rather ugly stain near my kitchen table. I was pretty sure it was blood, though there were no other signs of the poachers. “They killed my father.”
Braun nodded. “Daniel Locke,” he said. “He used to work with us.”
I blinked at him. “He did?”
Kodi nodded.
“Which is why we wanted to see if you would like to work with us in the same capacity,” Paul announced seriously.
“What kind of position?” I asked suspiciously.
“Wildlife intermediary,” Braun said calmly.
My eyes narrowed. “What does that even mean?”
“Oh,” Kodi said calmly, swinging his leg, “it means rescuing magical creatures and kicking poacher butts on a regular basis.”
&nb
sp; “That,” I said willingly. “I can do.”
Want to Read more by Elizabeth A Reeves? Try:
Cindy Eller Books:
How (Not) to Play with Magic
How (Not) to Kiss a Toad
How (Not) to Kiss a Prince
How (Not) to Kiss a Beast (coming May 2013)
Goldie Locke Books:
Baehrly Beginning (A Goldie Locke Short Story)
Baehrly Breathing (Coming May 2013)
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