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"Wang was charming, and because he ended up giving me the job, I thought little of it for a long time. Later I realized I had been interviewed for a much different job."
Everyone laughed as Bailey threw a paper cup at her spouse. Not deterred, Evan only caught it and kept on.
"I remember Wang kept asking me if I was a person who would stick with something. I told him I thought I was, but he kept questioning me in different ways. Well, anyway, it wasn't a month after I began that I discovered what he meant. Each weekend this beautiful girl came to help in the kitchen, and every single guy in the restaurant fell apart. We forgot orders, dropped things, and in general, made fools of ourselves. We all knew she lived at the resort, but she was so shy and quiet that we couldn't get ten words out of her not even her last name."
Evan turned to smile at Bailey, who was shaking her head at him.
"I think maybe I should have told this story," Bailey started. "I don't remember it quite that way."
"Like I was saying," Evan jumped back in, much to everyone's amusement, "this beautiful girl kept coming in. Prior to that I had never known the meaning of the word 'perseverance.' I did everything in my power to get her to talk to me, but nothing worked. Then Wang, foxy old matchmaker that he is, deliberately put us together to clean out the big cooler. I was supposed to be waiting tables they were even shorthanded but I was in the cooler with the girl of my dreams for two hours." Evan gave a dramatic sigh that had everyone laughing again. "Somewhere along the line I finally got permission to see her outside of work."
Evan looked at his wife again.
"I didn't find out until much later that she liked me all along."
This story was also greeted by cheers and clapping before the McFarlands were asked to share. Ashton ended the topic with his story about Deanne, and by then everyone realized that a sing-along was not going to work. Darkness was falling, and they still had the fire going, but the children were beginning to droop. As
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a group they returned to the house, remains of the meal in hand. Spirits were still high for the adults, but sleepy little ones could not be ignored. The family saw everyone to the door, and when they got back inside, Lily had already started on the dishes. Since Evan and Bailey needed to put the kids to bed, the boys helped lily in the kitchen.
"That was fun," she said, a smile on her face, her arms elbow-deep in suds.
Ashton was on the verge of telling her she might have her own story one day, but something stopped him. In that instant he realized he didn't know lily all that well. His heart had been saddened over the way she had been so painfully uncomfortable around them when she first arrived, and at the beginning he had done everything in his power not to make it worse for her. Lately he teased her and she always laughed, but this was different. This was a matter of the heart.
"How did your parents meet, Lily?" Ashton, having a brainstorm, asked as he turned to watch her face.
Lily smiled. "In an airplane. My father was already living in Kashien, and on one of his trips back to the States, he and my mother sat next to each other on a flight from California. He had never planned to marry, but by the time they landed, he couldn't stop thinking about her."
"How long before they were married?"
"Only three months."
"And where were your parents originally from?"
"My father was born in Chicago, but he was placed in an orphanage before he was a week old. My mother's family was from the South, New Orleans, but when she came to Christ, her family wanted nothing to do with her. She tried writing and being in touch with them her entire life, but they never responded. They didn't reply even when my father wrote to tell them she had died."
"How did she die?" Ashton wished to know; Gabe could have told him but stayed quiet.
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"Breast cancer. My father was ready for us to return to the States, even though we wouldn't have had a home. But by the time they discovered the cancer, it had started to spread all through her. We went back to the village and lived as normally as possible until she could no longer function. Then we made her as comfortable as we could until she died."
"How old were you?"
"I was 12 and Jeff was 16."
The men were silent after this, and Lily glanced at them, wondering if maybe she had said too much.
"And you said they were both believers when they met?" This also came from Ashton.
"Yes. My father had already put together a small church, and the village was coming to respect him. When he told my mother about the work he was doing, she got very excited. That was another reason he was so drawn to her."
The threesome fell quiet then, each with his or her own thoughts. Lily's mind was transported back to a time when she lay in her mother's bed and heard about life before she was born. Ashton's mind was on Gabe, and Gabe was thinking of Lily.
"So tell me," Gabe began, "why didn't you feel you could tell Evan and Peter that the skating wasn't going well?"
Lily looked up to find they were alone. She didn't know when Ashton had exited the room, but Gabe was watching her, one hip leaned against the counter as though he had all the time in the world.
For a few minutes, Lily's eyes went back to the sink. The dishes were all washed, but she took her time washing the suds down the drain.
"I think there were a few reasons," she began, eyes still on her work. "I wanted to try my hardest, and I didn't want to disappoint Peter."
"Anything else?"
"Yes, but I'm not sure how to put it." "Please try."
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Lily glanced at him and then away.
"You've all taken your time and energy to help me. I'm not going to be foolish and tell myself that I owe you for the rest of my life or anything like that, but the least I can do is be appreciative of your efforts."
"Even when you don't like something or you're being hurt?"
Her voice matter-of-fact, Lily said, "Yes, even then."
"If you can, I want you to do something for me tomorrow, Lily."
"All right."
"I want you to come to me and complain "
"Complain?"
"Yes."
"About what?"
"About something you don't like."
She frowned in confusion but still asked, "What if there isn't anything?"
Gabe thought about this before saying, "Will you please try this instead: Complain about something from today."
Lily stared at him. Was he serious? She looked for some sign of teasing and saw none. Her mind cast about for something to say, but she was too surprised.
"Was there any sand on your plate or in your food at dinner tonight?" Gabe prompted. "Did you get tired of sitting with your legs to one side for so long? Did you like the juice Bailey served at breakfast this morning, or did you just make yourself drink it? Did the in-line skates kill your feet because they were too small?"
This all asked, Gabe kept watching her. He wasn't sure he was going about this the right way, but he knew they had to start somewhere.
"May I ask you something?" Lily sounded breathless and confused, but Gabe tried to ignore it. "Yes."
"Why would you want me to be unthankful and complain about such small matters?"
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"Because you need someone you can talk to. You need someone you can be completely truthful with, instead of always being forced to hide your opinion for fear of bothering or hurting someone else."
Lily looked completely shaken. How he had known that no complaining or grumbling whatsoever was allowed in her fathers home she did not know, but this was so unsettling that she could barely think. In fact, it was so much so that she almost turned from Gabe and walked across the room.
"Go ahead," Gabe instructed gently. "You can walk away from me if you like."
Lily had all she could do to keep her mouth closed.
"But that would be rude."
"Not to me. If you're upset and need to move around,
that's perfectly fine. Or if you want to tell me that you don't wish to discuss this right now, I'll drop it on the spot and ask you about it later."
The tone of his voice, the look in his eyes had anyone ever shown her such compassion? Lily actually felt as if she could cry. She didn't. Instead she turned back to the sink, her eyes on nothing.
"Is this a bad time?" Bailey suddenly said from the door.
"Actually, it is, Bailey. Thank you," Gabe said as she gave a little wave and slipped out the door. He turned back to see that Lily was staring at him in horror.
"What if she needed something?" Lily asked, thinking this man had lost his mind. "This is her kitchen."
"You're important too."
At first Lily didn't comprehend his words. She heard them, but they were said so plainly and simply that Lily didn't at first catch on. When she did understand his meaning, she couldn't take her eyes from the man across from her.
At last she admitted, "I don't have a single argument in my head."
Gabe's gaze grew very tender.
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"But you can argue with me, Lily. I want you to know that."
Lily looked at a complete loss and needed to blink away the moisture that threatened to fill her eyes. She took a moment to compose herself and found that she had a question after all.
"What if Baileys need had been an emergency?"
"Then she wouldn't have even asked about intruding. She would have come in and stated her need."
This was clear to Lily now, but a moment ago she had still been in the dark.
"Are you going for a run in the morning?" Gabe asked.
"If I wake early, yes."
"When do you not wake early?" Gabe teased a little. Lily smiled. "Now that you mention it, I can't remember the last time."
"Maybe I'll be up and go with you." "Okay."
"And then we have a golf lesson."
"Oh, that's right," Lily managed to say, keeping all disappointment out of her eyes.
Gabe thought he might have seen something, but believing Lily had had enough for one evening, he said nothing more.
They parted company just moments later. Lily walked to her room, thinking about Gabe's request that she complain. She knew that was not what he had literally meant. He wanted her to be herself, stating her preferences, and saying what was on her mind.
I can't do that, Gabe, Lily's heart said once she was behind her own closed door. You want me to be who I am, and I think this is it. I can't tell you what I feel deep inside. It's just not allowed. I can't even tell you that as much as I want to learn to golf, Bailey was going to take me to the grocery store tomorrow, and I've never been to one.
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Chapter 14
Gabe could not sleep. He felt that he had handled things all wrong with Lily. He wanted her to be wide open with him, but in a way he still had control over her. And did she actually understand what he had meant? Did she realize that he wasn't looking for a complaining shrew but a person who could speak her mind? He knew that she would never turn into a harridan, but the thought of never being able to share what you had on your heart was very painful to him.
Even David cried out to God from the depths of his heart, Gabe reasoned. Often in the Psalms David began by asking God if He had forgotten him, or why He had even let him be born. But David always ended his prayer with praise for his Creator and recognition of God's mighty power and love.
Gabe had learned to speak all the thoughts of his heart to the Lord when he was too sick to speak or utter a sound. Maybe Lily was able to be that open with the Lord too. But as soon as Gabe had been better, he had also been surrounded by family and friends who were willing to listen. At this moment, Gabe was asking himself whether lily was able to talk even to Jeff or her father.
Thoughts of Jeff took Gabe's mind in another direction. Evan had told him to call Jeff, but he didn't know if he could do that. The thought of verbalizing to Jeff his changing feelings toward Lily even on the phone was a little too hard to imagine.
Nevertheless...
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Gabe got up quietly and left his room. He padded his way through the dark and quiet house until he was at his sisters desk. He knew where she kept her writing supplies. It would have been easier to type it on his computer, but he didn't want to go over to the office at this hour.
The letter began Dear Jeff, and continued,
I would like you to call me when you get this, but not until you feel the time is right. I wanted to call you, but as close as we are, I feel awkward on this one. The truth is, my feelings toward Lily are changing. Because of our close relationship, I have cared for her as your sister for many years as I do your father but not until I had a chance to be a part of Lily's world did I realize how special she is.
But here are my numerous dilemmas. First of all, you. How do you feel about what I've just admitted? Second, your father. What would he have to say if he knew? After that it gets worse. What if I find myself in love alone? And now the worst yet. What if I get close to Lily and she falls for me, but I find she's not the one? The thought of hurting her is more than I can bear. Maybe that feeling alone should tell me she's the one, but as you can see, I'm a mess!
When the time is right, Jeff, please call. If Lily is standing at my elbow, clearly we won't be able to talk of this, but I need to know your heart, and as best you can figure, your father's heart.
I just realized that all of this leaves Lily out of the mix. Well, if she learns of my feelings and doesn't share them, at least she'll be back in Kashien and I won't have to face her every day. If I am the only one harmed, I'll deal with it. As you know, I'm not a stranger to pain, but Lily must not be hurt not by me or the disapproval of her family.
Again, I await your call, Jeff. I don't need to say it, but I will anyway: We're brothers of the heart, and we must never let anything change that
Love, Gabe
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By the time Gabe got back into bed, it was quite late and he was finally tired. He opted not to set his alarm something he would be forced to do all too soon. As late as the hour was, he knew he would never be out of bed to run with Lily.
But maybe that's for the best, he told the Lord, turning on his side to get comfortable. Maybe she needs her space after the way I handled things in the kitchen tonight.
Lily was up early, but there was no sign of Gabe. She didn't wait for him but made her way to the beach and began a slow run. The morning was beautiful, and in no time at all Scripture passages about God's goodness and His creation were coming to her mind.
Right now Lily was translating the book of Genesis into Kashienese. Because of that, she had more than half the book memorized, so it was at times like this that she liked to start with the first verse and go down through the order of creation, thinking about when everything would have been new: the gathering of the waters, the dry land and mountains appearing, the sea and air teaming with life.
But that wasn't Your greatest accomplishment, was it, Lord? Lily prayed, thinking that the intricacies of the human body were beyond compare.
Lily took some time to thank God for her strong limbs and stamina. She picked up the pace, loving the feeling of heat emanating from her body and the way her heart beat faster. She pushed herself some ways down the beach but then realized she hadn't been this far before. Slowing her pace so she could take in the morning, Lily jogged along easily, her mind going to Proverbs 8, where God's Word stated that wisdom was even older than creation. It was one of Lily's favorite chapters from Proverbs because from the twelfth verse on, it was as though Wisdom herself was speaking. Right then verses 22 and 23 came to Lily's mind.
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"The Lord possessed me at the beginning of His way, before His works of old. From everlasting I was established, from the beginning, from the earliest times of the earth.''
I need that wisdom, Lord, Lily's heart went on. There's so much I don't know, so much is still new. I want to be able to tell my father that I wor
ked hard, but the time is drawing to a close, and I still want time to relax with Jeff and not have to be so studious. But that doesn't change the fact that it's all so new and different
Lily was barely aware of coming to a stop, but she was no longer running. Her eyes were on the waves that lapped onto the shore. For a time she watched the rhythm and order of the water, and when she prayed this time, she whispered in the wind.
"You're so huge and brilliant. You can make perfect waves come onto the shore. My heart can only imagine what treasures of creation lie within the waters themselves. I wasn't praying to You earlier; I was fretting. Help me, Father. Help me to be strong and do what I'm told to do. And whatever each day presents, help me to be thankful and work my hardest."
It felt good to start running again. It helped clear Lily's mind and show her that she didn't have to be in control. She had a God who could handle it all.
It was a small thing, really, but Lily's heart was telling her differently. Her thoughts from the beach that morning were far from her as she sat in Gabe's car. He was driving them to the golf course. He even had two sets of clubs in the back.
Lily wanted to learn to golf she truly did. Jeff knew how to play and would be proud of her, but doing this today meant forfeiting something else.
"Oh, there goes Bailey," Gabe said conversationally. Unbeknownst to Lily, the other vehicle had been close behind them all along. Not able to hide her interest, Lily's head turned so fast that she nearly hurt herself, but Bailey passed with only a honk and sped on her way. Lily had at least hoped for a glimpse of something more. It had cost lily much to tell the other woman that she
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couldn't go with her, but she had done it. Her heart aching over what she must be missing, she suddenly realized all was not lost.