Lily was shocked but hid it. However, her impassive face still managed to alert Bailey.
"Don't get me wrong, Lily. You're welcome here for as long as you need, but you came to see your brother, and he's not here. We all understand how painful that must be. Gabe's heart was genuine in his offer to Jeff, and we're glad you could come, but talking about it and watching you go through it have turned out to be two different things."
This Lily understood. A part of her mind wanted to panic that she had not pretended to be having a good time, but then she saw how foolish this was. If she was miserable, it was best that they knew this. Even as the thought surfaced, Lily's face heated. How would she ever explain her feelings to these strangers? She glanced up to see Bailey smiling at her a kind and understanding smile.
62
But anything Bailey might have been preparing to say had to wait as her husband and brothers came on the scene.
"Can we get some food?" Evan said.
"Sure. What do you want?"
"We'll get it. Do you want anything, Bailey?"
"Yes. I'll have a sandwich, I think."
In what felt like a heartbeat, the atmosphere of the kitchen changed for Lily. She was not afraid of men, but neither was she as comfortable around them as she could be around women and children.
The four family members worked on a snack, sending occasional comments and questions to Lily. But unless she was told to, she did not raise her eyes.
When it was at last time to head to bed, Lily was relieved. Her own efforts had wearied her, not to mention her failures. She wondered until she fell asleep whether she would ever grow comfortable with these people.
When dinner ended on Thursday night, Lily immediately went to work on the pots and pans that had been left in the kitchen. Peter trailed behind her, and Ashton went to give a hand, but Gabe stayed back to question Bailey. Having extended the invitation to Jeff, Gabe felt the most responsible for their guest, but the week had flown by He had even missed two evening meals with the family because he had meetings. It was time to do some make-up work.
Lily's feelings about her brother leaving and her new position in their family had been greatly on his mind, but he had not had time to act on them. He knew now, with the week almost over, that this must change.
"So what does Lily do all day?" Gabe asked his sister as soon as the room was emptied of everyone but himself, Bailey, Evan, and Celia.
"She works, reads, or plays with the children. When Terri arrived Monday and again today to help me clean, the three of us
63
started on the house. Lily has fallen into our schedule, either with the kids or the house, as though she's been living here for years." "And did she seem comfortable?"
"As long as no men are in the room. The quiet woman you see at the dinner table and in the evenings is not the woman who works and plays all day in this house. The kids have already fallen in love with her."
Gabe nodded but had no comment. He had already talked to his brother before dinner, which left just Lily. In truth they would all be rather busy for another week, but they could still squeeze in time to teach Lily some new pursuits. Gabe had worked it out on paper. Now he had only to explain the first step to Lily.
"So what did you do today, Pete?" the little boy's uncle asked. "I played and watched videos with Lily and CeCe. Lily likes Pooh Bear."
"She has good taste." "lily and I like Tigger too."
"Well!" Ashton said, his voice managing to sound matter-of-fact and comical all at the same time. "Who doesn't like Tigger?"
"Rabbit," Peter told him, and Lily heard Ashton hoot with laughter.
"How's it going?" Gabe came on the scene just then, a stack of dishes in his hands.
"We're almost done with these pots," Ashton filled him in. "Who's doing plates?"
"I think Evan. I'm drying. Hey, Lily?"
"Yes?"
"Could you please look at me, Lily?" Gabe requested for the first time. He wanted to shake his head all over again at how busy he had been.
"When I talked to Jeff about your staying here," he said once eye contact had been made, "I told him we would teach you to swim and do all that stuff. Did he tell you about that?"
"Yes, he did."
64
Lily's whole body trembled as she looked at herself in the mirror. Her brother had told her the suit was very modest and that she looked nice, but it hadn't helped. So much of her showed! She wasn't used to her legs being exposed above the knee, or her upper arms, not to mention the suit fit like a second skin. The clothing she wore in Kashien was long and loose-fitting. Even most of the clothing that Jeff had bought for her tended to
"Good. Tomorrow after lunch, Ashton is going to teach you to swim."
Lily barely managed to nod. "Does that work for you?" "Certainly. Whatever you wish."
It was not the reply Gabe hoped for. How did he explain to lily that she could go home if she wanted to without sounding like he wanted her to leave? Gabe had no clue. Evan had told him some of the things that Bailey had said to Lily on Sunday, and he feared that adding his own voice would make it sound as though they wanted her gone.
"Do you have a swimsuit?" he asked, sticking to more practical matters.
"Yes, I do."
"Okay then, that's all set."
"Do you know how to get to the pool, Lily?" Ashton asked.
"I don't think I do," Lily answered, realizing not for the first time how little she had been outdoors.
"Okay. I'll just meet you here tomorrow at 12:30. The beach towels are in that linen closet outside the bathroom door."
"Okay."
Lily's eyes had already gone back to the work she was doing, so the brothers were able to exchange a glance.
They were still asking themselves Bailey's question from Sunday afternoon: Should Lily have returned to Kashien?
65
Along that line. There were some shorts, but Lily had shied away from them.
But time was creeping up on her. The clock on the dresser said 12:28. Taking a deep breath, she made herself walk to the door and out into the hall. The brightly colored towel from the linen closet was in her hand only a moment before she realized she could wrap it around herself. Her heart still pounded in her chest as she walked down the stairs, but at least most of her was covered.
"Lilyee." Celia said her version of their guest's name as soon as she walked in the door, and Bailey turned to see her. "Are you all set?"
"I think so," Lily answered, but she was on her way over to Celia, who was finishing her lunch at the table.
"You missed this piece," Lily said to the little girl as she pushed a scrap of bread into view.
Celia stuffed it in her mouth and smiled at Lily Lily's heart did a little flip-flop.
"Where is Peter?"
"He's eating Daddy today."
Lily knew there was a translation somewhere for that statement, but she didn't try to find it. Indeed, there was no time. Ashton showed up just a moment later, and they were on their way to the pool.
The swimming pool at the Kapaia Resort was spectacular. Set among palm trees and lush flower beds, the rectangular pool had wide steps that went into the three-foot end, which soon graduated to five, and then had a brisk drop-off to the nine-foot deep end, where one could dive from the board. The five-foot mark in the pool even sported a slide. And since the whole pool area was empty and clean, for a moment all Lily could do was stare.
"Okay, Lily, get in. I'll be right with you."
66
Lily had been dreading just that but saw no hope for it. She moved slowly to a chaise lounge where she could place her towel, but then she glanced to see that Ashton's back was to her. Thinking that she had been given the perfect opportunity, Lily swiftly discarded her towel and almost ran for the cover of the water. She nearly gasped at the temperature change but didn't stop, even when it hit the level of her stomach. She wanted as much water over her as she could find. What she hadn't counte
d on was how swiftly the levels changed. Lily almost had the water where she wanted it when it felt like her foot was slipping off a cliff.
Not able to stifle the small cry of surprise and with nothing to reach for, Lily's head was underwater before she knew it. There was only water below and above her. Where had the bottom of the pool gone? Panic as she had never known consumed her. Her hair was in her face, and try as she might to find the surface, it eluded her. She thought she was going to die when suddenly strong arms lifted her.
Her head broke free of the water, and she gave a huge gasp. Coughing and panting in terror and pain, she felt herself being lifted and carried. Not until she felt the seat beneath her and a towel pressed into her hands did she open her eyes. Ashton was very close. Lily glanced up to see his eyes huge with shock.
"I'm sorry," she gasped, eyes back down, her whole frame shaking. "I'm so sorry."
"It's all right, Lily. Just sit here a minute. It's all right."
In truth, Ashton was trying to convince himself as much as his pupil. When she had cried out and he had turned to see her going under, he had not immediately reacted. Not until he had realized that she was not coming up did he dive in to get her.
"I'm sorry," Lily said again, her whole frame still trembling.
"You have nothing to be sorry about, Lily. It's my fault."
Lily couldn't have disagreed more, but at that moment her father's face swam before her eyes.
You will not shame me, Lily.
67
With a Herculean effort, Lily willed herself to stop shaking. She glanced at the water but made herself stop thinking about what had just happened.
"Lily," Ashton said from beside her, "you can't swim at all, can you?"
"No."
Ashton put a hand to his face. "I can't tell you how sorry I am. I thought this was going to be some sort of refresher course. If I had known you couldn't swim at all, I would not have let you in the pool alone. I can't tell you how sorry I am."
"Oh no, Ashton. It was all my fault."
Lily would have gone on but stopped when he laid a hand on her arm. She felt his hand shake, and before she could think otherwise, she lifted her eyes to his. The face she saw shocked her with its sobriety.
I'm so sorry, Lily. When I think of how easily you could have drowned, I " Ashton looked away from her, and as Lily dropped her eyes again, she saw how wet he was. He still had his T-shirt on.
Lily used the towel then and dried off as best she could. She wished she had pulled her hair back with a de, but she did her best to smooth it away from her face.
I'm ready to swim now," she told him quietly, so wanting to make things right. What a horrible thing to have happen the first time the Kapaias tried to teach her something. Lily purposed in her heart to do better.
Ashton looked at her profile.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
The swimming instructor glanced down just then and spotted a bottle of sunblock by the leg of the chaise lounge. "Do you need some of this?"
Having gone back to thinking about what had just happened, Lily answered without even focusing on the plastic container. "Will it help me swim?" Ashton laughed at her joke and stood up.
68
"It sounds like you're as ready as you're going to be, Lily. Come on. I'll go in with you this time."
Discarding his T-shirt, Ashton walked to the edge of the steps, and Lily made herself follow. When they finally stood in the three-foot area, Ashton directed her to the edge of the pool.
"Okay, the first thing I need to tell you is that I'll be between you and the deep end. You're not going to slip off again."
"Okay." Lily knew she sounded breathless but couldn't help herself.
"The next thing I need is for you to look at me every time I speak."
Lily's eyes came up.
"Even if I don't call your name, as soon as you hear my voice, you look at me. Can you do that?"
After Lily nodded, he showed her how he wanted her to lean her forearms against the edge, put her legs back, and kick.
And with that, the lesson commenced. Lily was a swift learner, and her desperate need to have Jeff and her father be proud of her propelled her to keep on, even when she felt afraid. In less than an hour she had learned the survival float and was moving toward the five-foot area.
"I can't believe you never swam before," Ashton kept saying. "You're doing a great job."
"I'm a little worried about the deep part."
"Well, I'll be right with you. In no time at all, you'll be jumping from the board."
Lily couldn't help but laugh, but as the lesson grew more difficult, time faded away. Lily's head was in and out of the water so often, she lost all sense of the day. She was learning to breathe properly, kick her feet, and keep her hands perfectly cupped for her straight-arm strokes.
"How's it going?" Bailey called from the edge of the deep end. It was well after 3:00.
"Great. After trying to drown the woman, I think I might have taught her to swim."
69
Lily laughed again.
"If you're going to stay out much longer, Lily," Bailey said conversationally, "you'd probably better get some more block on. You're looking a little red."
Before Lily could ask the question that was inside of her, Ashton spotted it too.
"You are red, Lily. We had better finish up for today."
"All right. Thank you, Ashton."
"You're welcome. You did a great job."
Lily swam to the shallow end and climbed from the pool, still self-conscious about being in a swimsuit, but when she toweled off, she did notice that her shoulders and arms were tender. That faded, however, when she felt hunger gnawing at her insides. The bowl of fruit in the kitchen came to mind, and after thanking Ashton again and wrapping up in her towel, Lily headed that way.
After the snack, Lily went up to take a shower. She smelled of chlorine and wanted it out of her hair. She would have enjoyed learning about the workings of the pool, but there had been no opportunity to ask.
Lily had been in the shower just a few minutes when a wave of nausea hit her. She thought she might have eaten too fast and was glad when it passed. However, when she climbed from the shower and looked at herself in the bathroom mirror, this time without her suit, a feeling of dread covered her. She was red. Very red. And a dull headache had started to throb around her forehead.
By the time she got to her room she felt very tired as well. After dressing in her loose, comfortable clothing, Lily decided to lie down. In less than five minutes she was sound asleep.
Dinner was on the table before Bailey realized she hadn't seen Lily since the pool. From the living room, she could see that Lily's door was closed and thought maybe the swimming had worn her
70
out. Nevertheless, dinner was on, and Bailey wanted to give her a chance to eat.
When a soft knock on her door brought no response, Bailey quietly opened the portal to the shadowy room. She could see that Lily was in bed.
"Lily?"
Lily moved a little.
"Come in," she called, although her mouth felt very dry. "Lily, it's Bailey. Dinner is on."
"Oh, I'm sorry you had to come for me, Bailey. I must have fallen asleep."
"Okay. Do you want to come down?" Lily tried to lick her lips.
"I'm not at all hungry," Lily finally said, her voice low. "Would it be all right if I didn't?"
"That's fine. Did you burn today?" "I did, yes."
"Okay. I'm going to run and get you some aloe lotion."
Lily didn't move while her hostess did this, thinking how easily she could go right back to sleep. Even when she heard Bailey returning, she could not find the energy to move.
"Here you go," Bailey said, coming through to put it on her dresser.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome. Come for me if you need something, Lily. And be sure to drink plenty of water." "All right. Thank you."
&nbs
p; Bailey left and shut the door. Lily could tell that she had burned quite badly. Her skin felt awful, but she had no energy to get up and use the lotion. Before she could contemplate the matter much more, she fell asleep again.
When Bailey turned in, a little after 10:00 that night, she checked on Lily one last time. This time the younger woman did not wake up.
71
Chapter 6
Although Lily had been lying awake since three in the morning, she did not join the family until breakfast. Moving slowly so as not to shift her arms, shoulders, or back, Lily walked in a state of near shock over the way her body felt.
The lotion had done nothing. It felt cool the moment she used it, but the burning sensation was back so fast it startled her. And what was worse, she felt cold. She felt so chilled that she wanted to shake, but she had let herself do that once and knew from the pain it caused she must not let it happen again.
She could hear everyone at the table as she descended the open stairway. They were talking and sharing the paper as they had done other mornings, but Lily didn't try to look up. She wanted to care what her brother thought, but right now nothing mattered. The closer she got to the smell of food, the more she felt she could be sick. But she still forced herself to take her seat.
What Lily didn't notice was how silent the table had become the moment everyone spotted her. The family had looked at her to say good morning but had not uttered the words. Even Bailey's soft "Oh, my," was lost on Lily. Not until Gabe was suddenly next to her chair did Lily realize much of anything.
"Here, Lily," he spoke quietly, "I'm going to pull your chair out."
"I'm not hungry," she said, thinking he wanted her to sit elsewhere to eat.
72
"Go for the car, Ash," Gabe ordered, and Lily heard him leave swiftly.
"Here we go," he said, his hands coming out to take hers. "Stand up for me."
"I don't feel well, Gabe," Lily told him, even as she stood. "I know you don't. That's why we're going to the hospital." "I think I need Jefferson."
Since the admission tore at his heart, Gabe said nothing.
"Mama crying," Celia announced, but it didn't register with anyone but Evan, who went to his wife.