Read Being Me Page 4


  I gasped for air and my fingernails dug into his back. My groin muscles twitched and jumped, flowing with pleasure that was growing tighter and tighter. I was so close to the edge, just a little further. Another thrust, and another. I flung my head back and tested the thickness of the walls. "Oh god! Yes! Yes! Fuck me harder!"

  Steven grunted and thrust harder. He sent me over the edge into an oblivion filled with bright lights and a pleasure I'd only dreamed about. He kept on pushing, driving me higher and higher until he hit heaven. He stiffened for a few seconds, and then fell down on top of me. All of him. The sexiness went away when his heavy, oozing weight started to crush me.

  "Um, air needed here," I wheezed out.

  "Oh, sorry." He pulled himself up onto his arms and gazed down on the heaving mass of flesh and fat that was me.

  I squirmed beneath that staring. That little fun had burned some calories, but my body was still as fat as ever. I didn't like him looking at me so close, so I did what came natural; I was snarky. "You did it again," I teased.

  He raised an eyebrow. "Did what?"

  "Apologized. You need to stop doing that."

  Steven laughed and leaned down to rub our noses together. "Fine. After this I won't apologize for anything else, even if you beg me to do it." He reached up and toyed with my chubby breast, and I quickly covered myself. "And you need to stop doing that."

  I frowned. "Doing what?"

  "Hiding from me. I told you I like some meat on my women."

  I sighed. "Well, maybe you'd rather have a medium steak than a full porterhouse," I countered.

  "Do you ever not have a witty comeback? I'm feeling outwitted," he asked me.

  "No, it's my defense mechanism against the world. It's either that or I become a successful serial killer bent on reducing the city to its knees out of fear of me and my epic scariness."

  He cringed. "That's an oddly specific alternate reality."

  I shrugged. "Sometimes I get bored and watch too much tv," I replied.

  "Well, never mind then, let's keep with the wit. You'd depopulate the office, and I hate being on either side of an interview to refill the place."

  I sighed and glanced at the clothes on the floor. "And speaking of the office, shouldn't we get back to work? People will notice we're gone."

  Steven smirked as he pulled out of me. "At least they didn't notice your praising me," he teased. I whacked him on the shoulder before he slipped off the couch. We'd really made that thing rock, and he pushed me and the couch back against the wall. He then nodded toward a door to his left. "There's a bathroom in there for you to cleanup."

  I sat up and winced. My thighs and hips complained of the workout. If he got any harder I'd need to reinforce my bones with adamantium. I cleaned myself up and slipped back into my crinkled clothes and straightened them, and myself, out as well as I could. Steven was replaced with his mild-mannered alter ego Dunner, and saw me off at the door. He held the knob like he did last night, and like last night his hand was on my butt. "Don't forget about tonight," he reminded me.

  I stared at him blankly. "What about tonight?"

  "Your place, and this time have two glasses out for that wine," he replied.

  Before I could answer him he'd opened the door for me. We were met with an unpleasant surprise in the form of Alicia. She stood in the doorway and I swear I saw her head swivel around like she'd been pressing her ear against the door. I didn't like that twinkle in her eyes; Dunner wasn't too pleased to see her, either. "Something I can do for you, Alicia?" he asked her.

  "Oh, um, I was just wondering when those interviews were going to start up again," she stammered out.

  Dunner raised an eyebrow. "You had your interview yesterday," he pointed out.

  "Oh, well, I just thought maybe something happened and was worried about my friend here." It took me a few seconds to realize she was talking about me. Thank god she didn't try wrapping an arm around my shoulders, or I would have had to light myself on fire to get her stench off. "Is everything all right?"

  Dunner wasn't convinced by Alicia's sudden interest in my welfare. "That's something you'll have to discuss with Miss Collins. But if you'll excuse me, I'll take your advice and start those interviews."

  That was my cue to get out of there. I hoped Alicia would go back to her own cubicle, but much was my horror when she turned into my dog and followed me home to my little box. She salivated for info on our 'conversation' in there, but I wasn't going to throw her any bones. "So what did you two talk about in there?" she asked me even before I sat down in my chair.

  "Not much, just about strategy and positions." That was technically true, in an innuendo sort of way.

  Alicia just kept digging. "Any news about your position?" she persisted.

  I shrugged. "Not really, still on this floor dealing with pests." I suddenly slapped my hand down on the desk as though swatting at a fly. Alicia jumped, and I grinned up at her. "Damn, missed her."

  She sneered back. "That's a pity, I was hoping the IQ on the floor would go up after you left."

  I mimicked a sad shake of my head and sighed. "I'm afraid you'll just have to be stuck dragging the IQ down with me." It was a slap at both of us, but I never minded laughing at myself. Alicia, however, wouldn't take a joke out for a cup of coffee.

  She put her hands on either side of the entrance to my cubicle and leaned in toward me. Her voice dropped to a low, hissing whisper. "You think you're so smart, don't you? That if you just make everybody laugh that they'll be your friends? Well, guess what, bitch, they're not. Nobody likes you and nobody cares about you."

  Usually her words didn't hurt me, but this time was a very painful exception. I wanted to hurt her like she was hurting me, but we didn't work the same way. I needed to strike at her with my usual weapon of choice: snark. "That's good to know in case I win a million bucks. I'll make sure to buy everyone a pin with the word 'douche' on it." I smirked when her face reddened with anger. "Careful there, Alicia, or your makeup will run," I warned her.

  "You just fuck off, bitch, or I'll make your life so bad you'll be glad to quit this place," she shot back. I expected her to finish off with a rattle of her tail, and snorted when I heard her jewelry clank. She angrily pulled back and gave me the greatest gift of all; the gift of her absence. I breathed a sigh of relief when her stomping steps faded into her cubicle. Then I turned around toward my monitor and leaned down to rest my forehead against the desk. This whole thing about being careful really wasn't working out all that well. We'd already been caught in a compromising liaison, and now here was Alicia threatening my livelihood with that same info.

  And speaking of info, I'd forgotten to get Dunner's phone number. Turns out he was busy the rest of the day, too, finishing up interviews and talking with the big-wigs in the afternoon. Rumors swirled around the floor like a tornado full of fear and despair. Everyone feared they'd be swept off their jobs by the ever-rumored layoffs, or that they'd be transferred to some horrible, primitive place where the natives were hostile heathens. For a lot of the people in the office that was anywhere outside the city.

  Dunner came back from that meeting with a dejected look on his face that didn't bode well for some of the floor crew. He called everyone from the security of their cubicles and broke the bad news to us. "I was just told we'd have to lay off a few people by the end of the week," he informed us. A murmur of terror swept the crowd; most of the people hadn't updated their resumes in a long time. "I haven't decided who will be the ones to go, but I'll be sure to help you all find new jobs and give you excellent recommendations for your next employer."

  Those words coming from someone we hardly knew didn't exactly inspire confidence in our new leader. It wasn't his fault there would be layoffs, but the mood shifted against him. He was no longer the golden child to most, but a fool's gold newcomer intent on making trouble. After his speech the ladies retreated back into their cubicles or went into others to talk with their friends, and none of them ogled our young
boss. The angel of their gold digger dreams had become the greatest threat to their ambitions.

  CHAPTER 5

  The mood was tense the rest of the day. Dunner came and went from his office, talking with everyone about the current projects and deadlines. They smiled and nodded, but the minute he turned his back they stripped off the makeup and scowled at him. Nobody dissed the behavior because they were all in the same mood. Well, everybody but me. After my little romp with the boss I was riding cloud nine on a new Harley, revved up and ready to go. That's probably why, when a group of the downtrodden passed by, I didn't react well to their conversation. It also didn't help that it was Delilah and Stacy. I swear those two stayed slim by all the walks they took around the floor.

  "You think they gave him a bonus to take the job and now they're having to cut somebody out to pay for it?" Delilah asked her friend.

  Stacy shrugged. "Maybe, but they probably waited for him to do these layoffs because Finner was too much of a wimp to do it. This guy's probably a yes-man who would get rid of all of us if he was ordered to."

  That was a double insult; one for my great old boss and another for my great new boss. I wasn't going to take that, so I swiveled around in my chair and cleared my throat. "Could you two keep moving? You're lowering the IQ in the area," I snapped at them.

  They turned to me with scowls on their mascara faces. Delilah was the more ingenious of the two, though that wasn't saying much, and recovered first. She nudged her friend and nodded at me. "Look who's got a crush on the boss. She's probably hoping to get on his good side and save her job."

  "I-I didn't say that!" I sputtered out.

  Stacy slipped a grin onto her pretty face. No matter how much I hated them I could never lie and call them ugly, at least not on the outside. "That's not what Alicia's telling everybody. She said you were with the boss a long time this morning."

  I actually breathed a sigh of relief. If Alicia would have heard anything incriminating she would have told these two stooges about it. "So what? That only proves we can have an intelligent conversation longer than it takes you two to make a thought."

  "You're right," Delilah agreed with me. I didn't think for a moment that she was being nice, and she wasn't. "He's not into fat people, and I heard he's got a girlfriend already."

  That surprised Stacy and shocked me. "He does?" she asked her friend. Delilah frowned at Stacy, whose eyes widened. "Oh, right, I guess he does. Some model downstairs or somewhere."

  Their acting fell flatter than tuba over a ten-story building, but I was flattered they considered me competition and played along. My big eyes filled with tears (of laughter) and my lips quivered (because I was trying hard not to burst out). "Oh, well, I guess that means everyone should stop trying to get at him. I mean, what chance does anyone have against a model?" I got up from my chair and stepped toward them as though to leave. My voice was a deep well of disappointment. God damn, but I should have been an actress. "Guess I'll go spread the word. Alicia should really hear about this, she's really been wanting to have a go at him."

  That got them panicked about their lie spreading beyond our little friendly circle. Delilah blocked the entrance to my cubicle with her body. "You don't need to do that, we'll tell everybody," she assured me.

  Stacy chimed in with her brilliant support. "Yeah, we'll go tell everybody right now."

  I rubbed my chin with my hand and narrowed my eyes. I made sure to speak slowly, and with a note of suspicion in my voice. "If you guys think you can handle it."

  "Yeah, we can handle it," Delilah replied. She grabbed Stacy's shoulders and whisked them both away.

  I peeked my head over my cubicle walls and watched them leave. They made it to Stacy's hole in the wall and stumbled in. I plopped down into my chair and covered my mouth to stifle the laughter. Those two were just no contest for the biggest stooges on the floor. After that I got back to work, and the workday ended without any more problems. Those came when I got back to my apartment. I hadn't forgotten again about my 'date' that evening, but I realized I'd forgotten everything else about it; namely that I had no wine to go with dinner. I also didn't have any dinner.

  As the only creature within hearing range, I asked Mr. Perkins for advice. "What in the world am I going to do? Should I go to the store and grab something or do I make it from scratch?" My running commentary happened while I was running around the kitchen searching for edible stuff in the cupboards. No luck, just cereal and grains. The doorbell rang, Mr. Perkins meowed, I yelped. I scampered my chubby butt over to the door and flung it open.

  Dunner stood in the doorway with his hand raised for another knock. I gave him a big, wide, terrifying smile that hurt, and stepped aside. My hand swept toward the living room. "Come in," I grimaced through my smile. I think my face was stuck.

  He looked at me like he agreed my face was stuck. "Um, thanks." Dunner stepped inside but jumped when I slammed the door behind him. Good thing I didn't lock it or he really would have been worried about me doing horrible things to him. Probably stemmed from a nervous nature, or maybe from my aspirations of becoming a serial killer.

  I finally got the smile pulled off my face and ended up looking like a long-faced funeral director. "Got here just fine?" I asked him. I couldn't think of anything better to say.

  "Well, I'm here in one piece, but with all the funny looks you're giving me I don't know if I'll leave here like that," he teased.

  "Hardy-har-har," I replied. "For that little joke I guess I'll let you have starvation for dinner."

  He glanced over to the kitchen. "I don't smell anything cooking."

  "That's because I can predict the future and knew you were going to be an ass, so I didn't start anything," I countered.

  Dunner laughed, and his bright smile changed him from that unconfident boss to the rascally lover with whom I was finding myself falling in love. "Maybe you want some help with it?"

  I slumped over. "Only if you're a miracle worker. I couldn't find a thing except cereal and some macaroni."

  "We'll just have to do what we can with what we've got." He glanced down at me as he said that and my face flushed.

  "I wish you wouldn't do that, it makes me nervous," I scolded.

  He leaned down and his grin had a mischievous look to it. "Do what?" he softly cooed.

  I stepped back. "That. You're just so, I don't so, so sexy, and I'm just not anything but a piece of whale blubber." I gestured down at all of me. "See? Fat as far as the eye can see, maybe even farther. Just pudgy me and sexy you. This just can't work out. One day I'm going to accidentally sit on you and you'll be crushed to death."

  Steven cupped his chin in one hand and leaned to one side. "You have a point there. That would be a pretty humiliating way to go."

  "See? You wouldn't want me for-"

  Steven didn't give me time to finish before he'd swooped down and caught my lips up in his earth-shattering kisses. My eyes closed and I reveled in the sensation of our mouths meshing together and fighting for dominance. His arms wrapped around my plentiful butt cheeks and gave them a nice squeeze. Those same hands also pressed my hips into his own, and ground us together. I moaned into the kiss and he chuckled. My eyes snapped open and I playfully pushed away from him. I didn't get very far because his hands still had a good grip on my ass.

  I glanced over my shoulder at his hands, and he responded by giving me a squeeze that made me jump. I whipped my head back to his bright eyes and evil face. "Do you mind? I'm going to need that butt to sit on later."

  "Sitting? Who said anything about sitting?" he teased in a low, husky tone.

  Even though I rolled my eyes, I was still flattered. "Is that all you ever think about?"

  "Mostly," he whispered, his lips edging toward mine again. "Do girls think about anything else?"

  "Sometimes. I was just thinking about how some of the girls on the floor were trying to spread a rumor that you had a model girlfriend on a different floor." My womanly suspicions were excited when he fr
oze and his mouth flopped open like a fish. I waited until he'd recovered before I started the inquisition; he expected it. "You don't have another girlfriend, do you?"

  His voice was about two octaves too high. "Kind of?" he squeaked out.

  My eyes lit up like Satan turned on all the burning lights of hell, even the night light in the bathroom. "What do you mean kind of?"

  Dunner cowered beneath my epic scariness and edged over to the couch, where he sat down on the cushions. "I was secretly going out with another woman in the office, but I broke it off."

  I was suspicious; he wouldn't have been so nervous if something else wasn't wrong. I stomped over to stand in front of him, and put my hands on my hips. "So what's the problem?" I asked him.

  "Well, the problem was she didn't take it so well. She thought I was joking when I called the thing off, and didn't return her phones calls, and wouldn't answer the door when she came over."

  I blinked. If what he was telling me was true then this woman was in serious denial. "You sure you made it clear you wanted out?"

  He slumped lower in the couch. If he went any deeper I'd have to extract him with a crowbar. "As clear as I could." Uh-oh. Knowing how wimpy he could be that didn't sound good. I held out my hand. He looked at it and blinked. "What?"

  "Fork over your phone and let me see the breakup text," I demanded.

  He cringed. "How'd you know that's the way I did it?"

  "Because you're just not the type to do it face-to-face, now fork over the phone."

  Dunner rummaged through his pants pocket and handed it to me. I scrolled through the pages and found what I was looking for. It started with an I'm-sorry. I read the short text out loud. "I'm sorry, Victoria, but I just can't be with you any longer. Please forgive me. Signed, Steve." I glanced up at him with a raised eyebrow. "Kind of cold, don't you think?"