* * *
On the way home I kept glancing in the rearview mirror, comforted to see Nathan’s pickup behind me. I felt safe with him and knew I’d be okay as long as we were together. My mind tried to process everything, but it was like a thousand emotions and questions strung together. I decided to treat it like a complicated math problem. There had to be a formula. I just needed to figure it out. It started with my first premonition, the one talking about death. But death meant change, and my life definitely had changed since then. And then I had an out-of-body experience and saw Matt’s eyes glowing.
Omigod! Was there a demon inside of Matt? Was that why Nathan didn’t want me to be alone with him? It had to be the reason, but Matt was my friend. And yeah, I saw his eyes glow, and my ears rang when he was around me, but why would a demon possess him?
I thought about the other day in history class when I had the last premonition. I thought at the time it might have something to do with the plague, but now it seemed to tie into this somehow. I recited the premonition in my head, but then my mind shifted back on Matt trying to persuade me to hang out with him. A haunting, cold feeling came over me when I recalled the weird look he gave me in history class. But the thing was, I’d been hanging around him for months, and he’d never been hateful or mean toward me.
My mind skipped to the guy in the restaurant and on the way to Carrie’s mom’s store. Was there a demon inside of him too? The characteristics he’d displayed were the same as the guy in the bar. But why would demons be after me?
All those thoughts were exploding inside my head, so when I reached my house, I sighed with relief, knowing my questions would soon be answered. I pulled into the garage, and when I went outside to meet Nathan, he was already there.
He embraced me. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.” I wrapped my arms around him, not caring if a nuke went off at that moment.
“I hope this doesn’t sound too presumptuous, but if it’s okay, I’d like to stay and chat with you here rather than in a public place. I don’t want anyone hearing what I have to tell you, and you’re safer at home than anywhere else.”
“I prefer you did,” I answered, my stomach flipping with the thought of being with him at my house tonight. Hell, he could come over every night if he wanted to.
He leaned next to my ear. “I was hoping you’d say that.” His warm breath blew against my skin, raising goosebumps Yeah, every night with me would be fine.
Something rubbed against my leg. I looked down, meeting shiny green cat eyes.
“Hi, Mr. Kitty,” I said, finally coming up with a name for him.
Nathan took my hand, and we went inside. I turned lights on while he hung our jackets in the closet. When I glanced at him, my mouth dropped. I knew Nathan had muscles, but wow. I mean, this was the first time I’d ever seen him in a short sleeve shirt, and man was he smoking hot. His arms were perfect, like everything else about him, and in that brief moment I imagined them around my body. I quickly looked away before he caught me drooling over him and headed for the kitchen.
“Do you want something to drink?”
“Here, let me.” He followed me into the kitchen, and in one sweeping motion, he lifted me into his arms.
“What are you doing?” I laughed, liking that I felt small and protected in his arms.
He sat me on the couch and smiled, but it was weak. He looked worried.
“I want you to relax.” He took my shoes off and went back to the kitchen.
“The glasses are in the cupboard next to the fridge,” I told him. “And there’s some sweet tea in the fridge.” It felt kind of weird being waited on, and I had to force myself to stay put.
The sound of ice cubes dropping in the glasses told me he had it under control. A few minutes later, he handed me my glass.
“Thanks.” I set the glass on the coffee table.
“You’re welcome.” He sat next to me and took a drink. “This is good tea. It reminds me of my mom’s.”
I stared at my lap, not knowing where to begin. I had all these questions to ask, but now my mind went totally blank, like white noise on a TV screen with no reception.
Nathan remained silent and drank his tea, waiting for me to speak. The only sound in the room were the ice cubes clinking. He was being incredibly patient with me, somehow knowing when I needed my space. But I didn’t know where to begin, so I blurted the first thought that came to mind:
“Did Romulus have a demon inside of him?”
He turned to me. “No, it was a dark spirit.” My forehead wrinkled, and he continued. “They sometimes fashion themselves as demons because they know humans have been instilled with the ideology demons exist, and it scares them. But in truth, they don’t exist. At least, not in the way history has taught them.”
Confusion clouded my mind. “I don’t understand.”
He gave me a small patient smile and said we were spiritual beings who had free will, and all of us had the choice on how we wanted to create ourselves and what paths we wanted to take. Some would decide to turn dark and not crossover to the next plane of existence. But I couldn’t understand why anybody wouldn’t want to. I mean, heaven or wherever we go was supposed to be an awesome place. Why would someone turn away from that? And he told me for a number of reasons: anger, selfishness, hedonism, ego.
“But there are spirits who are good that linger in this world too, right?” I asked.
“Absolutely, and eventually those spirits crossover with no problem. Once they’re ready that is.”
“But dark spirits don’t?”
His face turned dismal. “No, they reject any help offered to them.”
I wondered what would compel them to want to stay here, and asked him what their purpose was, and when he told me to inhabit humans when they wanted to and to claim earth as their own, I suddenly became cold and shook. He scooted next to me and placed his arms around my shoulders while he continued to tell me they saw earth as their personal amusement park and felt entitled to it.
“Can dark spirits inhabit any human?” I thought about one inside me, and a violent shudder went through me. He pulled me closer to him.
“Here’s the thing, Paige. There are humans born without a soul. They walk among us every day. These humans are the ones who commit atrocities with no remorse. Whether it’s physical or mental, it’s still the same. And when you look into their eyes, there’s nothing beyond them because the human shell is vacant.”
I got up, snatched the afghan from the trunk, and curled back into his arms. He moved it over my shoulders and said they could inhabit humans who had a soul, but they had to be invited in.
That made me feel better, but then I thought about Matt, and how we became friends when he moved back here from Seattle. I also thought about his eyes, and the premonition I had the other day. I decided to tell Nathan about Matt. After I was finished, he turned me around. He looked frantic, like he caught me about to drink a vial of poison.
“Matt has a dark, ancient spirit inside him. The oldest I’ve ever seen, and you need to stay away from him.” He paused. “Matt’s eyes glowed like that because of how old the spirit is. You see, the young ones are still acclimating to the human vessel, so you’ll see that beam of light swipe across their eyes instead of the whole eye glowing, like Matt’s does.”
My mind struggled to absorb every word that came out of his mouth, including Matt having a dark spirit possessing him. Now I knew why Matt was such a mean and hateful child. He had no soul. My blood seemed to be coagulating into ice from the terror running through my veins because I’d been hanging out with this dark spirit for like three months now, and … Carrie was dating him!
I took a drink to get rid of my cotton mouth and kept my face neutral under Nathan’s watchful eyes. But by the look on his face I wondered if he thought maybe I would fall apart or run away. He was almost right. Part of me did want to run and not look back because the things he told me weren’t a part of this box we lived i
n. What he had said broke down those cardboard walls, to where I was no longer boxed in and confined to a reality some people clung too. A reality to where they didn’t have to do or think beyond what others told them. A reality where one found comfort in complacency, and doing whatever needed to be done to get through their daily life. I had willingly participated in that reality, but not anymore, not with what I knew now. I couldn’t run away, even if I wanted to, but Carrie could.
“Will he hurt Carrie?”
“I don’t think so. He has no reason to.”
“You don’t think so,” I said, worried now. “Nathan, Carrie is my family. If she’s in any danger, I’ll do whatever I have to do to get her away from it. Even if that means confronting what’s inside Matt.” There was no way I would back down from this. My face hardened.
He placed his hands on my shoulders and locked his eyes onto mine. “Listen to me,” he said, his firm voice matching my stubbornness. “You cannot be alone with Matt. And if I have to, I’ll stop you.”
A short laugh escaped my lips. “You can’t stop me.”
The corner of his mouth curled, and he raised his eyebrows. “Try me.”
I lifted my chin. “Don’t underestimate me.”
Worry now crossed his face. “I’m serious, Paige. You may be risking your life being alone with him. I’d take care of him myself, but he’s too old for me to do that. So stay away from him.”
“Why?” I asked, my chin still raised.
He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “Because I’ve noticed, he’s interested in you. There’s something unique about you, and he knows it.” He looked disturbed, and I gulped. “During this past week, when I knew you were safe, I found out some of them can see a powerful light within you, but they’re not sure what it is. They’re only going by what the ‘old one’ in Matt has told them.”
“You know, I don’t understand any of this,” I said in frustration. “And I want to know now what’s going on.” I still didn’t get what this had to do with me. I was a nobody.
He nodded. “All right, but if I’m going too fast, or you don’t understand something, interrupt me, and I’ll explain it to you. But I’m only going to tell you what you need to know right now. I don’t want to overwhelm you.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, but okay.”
He hesitated and drew in a deep breath.
For a moment I didn’t think he was going to tell me. He looked scared in a way, like I would reject him afterwards. But then he spoke in a fast but clear voice, and I focused on his words to keep up.
“People like me can cast dark spirits out of a human, but they’re not gone for good. It just hurls them out, and they can’t enter another one until they recover from the excruciating pain it causes them and regain their energy. Sometimes, they never enter a human again.”
“So, you’re like a Catholic priest who can cast spirits out?”
He shook his head. “Catholic priests don’t really get rid of the spirit. The spirit just leaves after it’s finished toying with the people around it, gets bored, and finds another vessel. However, I do have to say, there are a few Catholic priests who are like me and can exorcize them.”
“But what does this have to do with me? I don’t know how to cast spirits out. And why do my ears ring when they come near me?” The panic I felt came out shrill in my voice.
“I’m going to answer your questions, but first I need to explain myself to you,” he said. “That night at The Lion’s Den, I already knew the dark spirit in Matt was interested in you. When he walked into the backroom, your reaction alarmed me. I knew it had to do with him, but I couldn’t understand how you picked up on it. Then you stuck a finger in your ear, and it took everything I had to compose myself because I never suspected this would happen to you. And then you mentioned the cat, and I panicked. But when I saw the way you were looking at me, like I was out of my head, I knew I had to get a grip on myself. I didn’t want my bizarre behavior to jeopardize my chance with you. But my thoughts were reeling to say the least, and on the way home I called Anwar to ask him about it, and he confirm–”
I raised my hands. “Wait a minute.” I scooted to the edge of the couch and faced him. “What does the cat have to do with any of this, and what do you mean when you said you never suspected this would happen to me?” My eyes narrowed.
His face fell. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you this earlier, but at the time I wasn’t sure how to. But the cat is an exalted soul who is a house protector for those mortals who are destined to observe and protect humanity from the dark energies that want to engulf it.” He paused, like he wasn’t sure whether to continue or not. He cradled my face in his hands, his eyes pouring into mine. “The cat is also a marker for immortality.”
“Excuse me?” I didn’t think I heard him right. Immortality? That was stuff of fiction. I had the sudden urge to laugh hysterically but rolled my eyes instead.
“Paige, I’m serious,” he said, his gaze steady on me. “I wouldn’t joke about this. You have a choice here, and it’s one only you can make.” His expression turned sorrowful, and a painful ache trembled through my heart.
“What choice?”
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I told myself not to get upset in front of you. It’s not right for me to burden you with my emotions.”
I was worried now, feeling a sense of impending doom, and the grief on Nathan’s face crushed me.
“What’s the choice Nathan? Why are you so upset?”
“You have the choice of becoming immortal or staying human. And I’m upset because if you stay human you’re going to die. The dark spirits will eventually kill you, and right now your life is in danger.” He looked down and shook his head. “I’m sorry for being selfish. I don’t want to influence your decision.”
“Wait a minute,” I said, still trying to wrap my head around this. “You’re telling me immortality is true, and I have a choice to live forever here on earth or having to look over my shoulder each day and possibly dying young?”
He nodded, his eyes holding mine.
I threw the afghan off me and jumped to my feet.
“I’m sorry,” I said, half laughing. “I believe everything you told me without a doubt, but the immortality part … Come on, you got to be frickin’ kidding me.”
He stood. “Really? You think immortality isn’t true?”
I laughed. “Yeah, I do.”
His lips turned into a mischievous smile. “Can a human do this?”
He disappeared, and before I could take a second breath, he was back with a knife in his hand, stunning me. He took my hand and led me to the kitchen, then stuck his wrist out.
“Wh-what are you doing?” I asked, but then realized exactly what he was going to do when he raised the knife blade. I grabbed his wrist. “Don’t do it.”
“Move your hand. I want you to see this.”
“No, I won’t!” He was insane. Why would he do such a thing to himself or to me?
“Please, trust me, Paige.” The blade still hovered over his wrist. “I’ll be okay. I promise.” He flashed me an encouraging smile.
“Fine.” I released my hand. “But if you die, I’m killing myself, and then I’ll find you and kick your ass.” I would too. I’d kick his ass for eternity.
He laughed, and with one swift swipe of the blade, he cut a deep gash in his wrist. The skin separated. Dark gooey blood gushed onto the tile floor. I went to get some towels, but he snatched my arm.
“Watch,” he said.
The sight of all that blood made me lightheaded, but I continued to watch. To my amazement the bleeding stopped, and his skin pulled together, sealing the wound shut. Within minutes, his wrist looked normal. There wasn’t a scratch or a scar where he had sliced it. I couldn’t believe it. This was frickin’ crazy! Was my reality just a damned lie all along?
Grinning, he proudly drew himself up. “Can a human do those things?”
The room pitched and rolled
. My knees buckled, but Nathan caught me. The next thing I knew, I was lying on the couch. I closed my eyes and felt something cold and damp being placed on my forehead.
Nathan was immortal. But how could that be? And now I could be immortal too. All of this didn’t seem real, like being trapped in a vivid dream.
At that moment, it became too much for my mind to process, and as a precautionary defense against a possible melt down, it shut all those thoughts out.
“Are you still with me?” Nathan asked, his voice deep.
I opened my eyes. The room had stopped spinning, and Nathan was on his knees beside me. I lifted my fingers and traced the line of his round face and square jaw, every perfect part of it. He looked down when I brushed my fingers over the top of his eyelids, to his cheek, and then his lips. I traced the bow on his lip, around to his bottom lip. His chest rose and fell faster, and my quick breaths could be heard in the silence. In that moment, I didn’t care about what I now knew or what was going to happen. I just wanted to be with him. I rested my hand on the side of his neck. He looked at me, and his dark blue eyes were extraordinarily bright, unlike the last time when it was too subtle to even question it. But now, the radiance in them jumped out at me from beneath his lashes.
“Why do your eyes change like that?” I whispered, moving my hand down his neck, feeling an uncontrollable desire swallowing me, making me a part of it.
“Because I want you,” he said in a low, fierce voice. His eyes shone with an intense yearning that made the ache to feel his touch unendurable.
I grabbed the washcloth off my forehead and threw it behind me, then seized his shirt, pulling him forward. I wasn’t usually this aggressive, but the fire inside my belly became too great to ignore.
“Wait.” He locked his arms above my head, his eyes still bright.
In one swift move, he had me cradled in his arms. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his. Our tongues connected, touching in a slow, seductive manner. My stomach did a continuous flip as our passionate kiss grew into hunger. I pulled him deeper into the kiss. A soft groan rumbled out of him, and then warm air brushed against my face. Nathan broke our kiss. I looked up, and he was glancing around the upstairs hallway. I pointed to my room where the bright moonlight spilled through the window. Nathan’s lips found mine again. He lowered me to the bed, encapsulating us inside the moon’s white light. I pulled his shirt over his head while he unbuttoned my sweater. Sitting up, I yanked it off, and threw it across the room.
He caressed my cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” I whispered, running my fingers down his muscular chest. He had the body of a champion gladiator who could take on two lions at once. It was breathtaking.
He leaned forward, slowly pushing me down. His hand held my wrists above my head while our lips reunited in passion and abandonment. A low, deep moan erupted from me when his other hand snaked beneath my white lace camisole, pushing it above my breasts, exposing them, causing my breathing to become unsteady. An electrical heat shot through me. Then his lips found their way to my neck, kissing a trail to my shoulder, his hand gently moving down my stomach.
“Are you okay?” he whispered a while later.
I smiled and nodded. “Just keep doing what you’re doing,” I said breathlessly.
His lips found mine again.
And for the next two hours, nothing existed but him and me.
Chapter Seven
Nathan’s Story