Read Big O's Page 21


  Without thinking, I curled my arms around her and hugged her back.

  “Hi,” I said through the emotion clogging my throat.

  She laughed and pulled back, staring up at me. “You want to help me with lunch?”

  I met Dinah maybe halfway through lunch.

  She’d been there all along, but according to a comment I’d heard from Eddie’s boyfriend, Rick, she’d gone to lay down and didn’t get up to join us until seconds were being passed.

  The moment she appeared in the doorway, Eva Jonson got up to fetch the plate she’d set aside for her oldest daughter, and when she brought it back, Dinah frowned down at it.

  “No meatloaf?”

  “You wouldn’t eat it anyway,” Eva said, waving a dismissive hand.

  I didn’t think much of the comment until later, when Eva leaned forward, elbows on the table. “Are you going to tell us, Dinah?”

  Dinah looked at her mother, a perplexed expression on her face. “Tell you what?”

  Eva laughed as she sat back. “You took an hour-long nap in the middle of the day, and you’ve bolted from the table twice. I think you know what I’m talking about.”

  “Oh, fine…” Dinah rolled her eyes while her husband leaned over and covered her hand with his. Her announcement of “I’m pregnant,” was almost drowned out by hoots and hollers as everybody else in the room figured out what Eva was getting at, and Dinah was soon enveloped by people wanting to hug her and ask questions.

  I stayed where I was.

  Surprisingly, so did Kane.

  “Aren’t you going to rush over and hug her?”

  He shrugged, a faint smile playing on his lips. “She’s getting plenty of hugs right now. I’ll catch her later.” He slanted a look at me. “You don’t seem too ready to bolt for the door. My family not scared you off yet?”

  “Nah,” I said lightly. I wasn’t about to tell him that I was about as enamored with his family as I was with him. That might scare him off. “This isn’t so bad.”

  The grin on his face told me that he’d seen some of what I was trying to hide.

  It was okay, though. I realized it as his gaze softened, and he leaned over to press a kiss to my temple, hugging me tight. I was surrounded by the scent of him, the feel and strength of him, and I let myself sink into his embrace.

  “None of that now,” a playful voice said.

  I looked up to see Eddie wagging a finger at us. His gaze locked with mine and he winked at me. “Leading my brother astray, I see how it is,” he said.

  I blushed while Kane swatted out with a hand, connecting with the back of his brother’s head.

  Eddie took it with good-natured humor, settling back in his seat next to Kane while eying the rest of the family, most of whom were across the table. “Looks like just about all of us are settling down, huh?”

  Kane’s arm came around my shoulders, and he tugged me in tight. “Looks like.”

  I leaned into him and let myself think about what Eddie had said.

  Settling down.

  That kind of meant…home, right?

  I realized I was smiling.

  Home.

  Here. Not this place, exactly. But here in New York. With Kane, even. Maybe we were moving fast, and maybe I was the only one who was thinking like this, but I didn’t think so.

  For the first time in forever, maybe the first time ever, I felt like I had a home, like I had a place where I belonged.

  37

  Kane

  My brothers and I took over the clean-up for the day.

  Mom wanted to fuss over Dinah, and I think she also wanted to hover over Raye, although she was too…gentle, too good at it to make Raye feel smothered.

  The look in Raye’s eyes when my mother had hugged her was one that was going to stay with me for a long, long time, probably the rest of my life.

  “Your girl’s a sweetheart,” Eddie said in a low voice as we washed dishes, both of us attuned to the voices out in the other room.

  “I know.”

  “You serious about her?” He shot me a look as he passed me a pot to rinse off. Once I was done, I turned it over to Justin to dry, and Austen took care of putting it up. We had the system nailed down.

  “Yeah, Eddie.” I met his eyes. “I’m serious about her.”

  “Been going out long?”

  I shrugged, not wanting to tell him we’d actually only been out on one or two dates in the past week, and before that…what did I call what we’d been doing before that? Not like I was going to tell him, but no. We hadn’t been going out long.

  The timing didn’t matter though.

  She felt right to me.

  And when she looked at me, I could see it in her eyes that she felt it, too.

  I wasn’t going to question that.

  “Well, good for you,” Eddie said, bumping my shoulder with his. “She makes you smile a lot. Shit, I didn’t know you could smile that much. So…yeah, good for you.”

  “She’s a good cook,” Austen piped up from his spot at the end of the line. He was moving to the beat of the music pulsing out of the headphones he had draped around his neck. The music was loud enough that all of us could hear it, but he was the only one who seemed to appreciate the loud, discordant tones.

  “When did you get to try her cooking?” Eddie asked, looking put out.

  I met Austen’s eyes.

  I didn’t have to do anything else.

  I’d had a talk with Mom – and yes, she had wanted to go after Calie, but other than her, nobody knew about the mess with Calie and Austen.

  And Austen seemed to have settled himself down in the days since it had happened. It was early yet, but maybe he’d gotten himself scared enough to get his act together. Not exactly the ideal way to do it, but it was better than not having it happen at all.

  Under Eddie’s sharp eyes, Austen shrugged and grinned. “Don’t worry, man. I’m sure she won’t mind cooking for you at some point. She just likes me more.”

  The good-natured ribbing kept up even once we were finished.

  Meeting Raye out in the living room, I looped my arms around her waist and asked if she was ready to go. Eddie could be as nosy as an old mother hen when the mood got on him, so I figured it was best to head out.

  She nodded, tipping her head back to meet my eyes. “We can go if you’re ready.”

  Once we were out on the street, I took her hand, trying to think up a subtle way to ask her if she wanted to spend the night, but Raye stepped in front of me, bringing me to a stop.

  She cocked her head, eying me nervously, then she blurted out, “You want to come over to my place?”

  I kissed her. “Sounds good to me.”

  The subway ride was becoming familiar, and I spent the time with my arm around her shoulders while she held my hand and traced her index finger over and around some of the scars on the back of my knuckles and my palm.

  Once we got to her place, she started up the steps.

  My phone rang, and I pulled it out, checked the number. It was one of the guys from work, so I let it go to voicemail and put the phone on vibrate. I could take a few hours away from the world, right?

  I went to put the phone in my pocket just as Raye rounded the corner, disappearing out of sight.

  I missed my pocket, dropping the phone in the process, my hands still numb from the cold. Swearing, I knelt to grab it. Once I had it in hand, I rotated it to check and make sure I hadn’t broken the screen. I’d lost more than a few phones that way.

  Luckily, the expensive case I’d invested in this time had protected it. As I went to shove it in my pocket, I heard a rush of footsteps and Raye’s startled voice.

  Adrenaline kicked in.

  I rushed around the corner just in time to see her driving her fist into the temple of a man nearly twice her size.

  He jerked back, but not in time to entirely avoid the blow. He looked slightly dazed, but he managed to catch her by the arm, jerking her up against him.


  That was as far as he got before I reached him, coming up behind him and wrapping my forearm around his neck. “Let me guess…” I said, anger pulsing inside. “You must be Chad.”

  He jerked against my hold, and I loosened my grip enough for him to slip away, but then I caught him again and slammed him into the wall, glaring into watery blue eyes that now held more than a little fear.

  “You like going around and terrorizing women?” I asked, shoving my forearm against his windpipe. His pale face started to go red.

  He opened his mouth, trying to choke out something. I doubted it was an answer to my question.

  “I’m going to put this to you plainly. You’re going to stay away from Raye. Permanently. For like…the rest of your life,” I said, speaking in a slow, measured voice. “If you come around her again, I’m going to round up some friends of mine. And let me tell you, these friends make me look like Santa Claus. Do I look like Santa right now?”

  The sleazy bastard frantically shook his head.

  “So, you can imagine what kind of friends I can round up, right?”

  He nodded, face now almost purple.

  I eased up on the windpipe and let him suck in air. Couldn’t have him passing out before I issued my big threat.

  “Now that you seem to get the picture, let me tell you what we’ll do to you if you ever come near her again.” I dipped my head and murmured close to his ear, feeling his body twitch and jerk with fear. “And if you touch her? There won’t be enough left of you to bury.”

  I drew back, letting him go.

  He sagged against the wall, reaching up to rub at his throat.

  “What do you think, Chad?” I made a sneer out of his name. “Think maybe you should stay away from Raye now?”

  He nodded and practically tripped over his feet as he ran away.

  38

  Raye

  The sight of Chad running away was one of the more satisfying things I’d seen in a long, long time.

  But even as I mused over that, my gaze was drawn back to Kane, and the look in his eyes caught me off-guard.

  He looked…uneasy.

  His eyes met mine, then slid away.

  It only took a few seconds to figure out what the problem was. Slowly, I went to him and held out a hand.

  He took it, and I walked backward, leading him to my apartment.

  “Come inside,” I said softly.

  He opened his mouth, but I pressed my index finger to his lips, overcome with a massive need for him, and oddly enough, tenderness. He’d protected me, this big, brooding, intimidating man, and he was now worried that…what? That I’d reject him? That I might be afraid of him?

  I felt safer with him than I’d ever felt with anybody.

  The idea of being afraid was almost laughable.

  Still holding his hand, I turned away and undid the series of locks on the door. Once I was done, I tugged him inside and redid each lock, still holding his hand in one of mine.

  Once the locks were set, I turned and nudged him back up against the door, pressing my mouth to his.

  He tensed in reaction.

  I traced my fingers along his cheek, felt a muscle pulse under my fingers.

  “Thank you,” I said, murmuring the words against his lips. I had no idea exactly what he’d said that had made Chad freak out, but I’d seen pure terror in the man’s eyes, and I doubted Chad would be back.

  It was knowledge that lightened my heart far more than I’d ever dared to imagine.

  Moving my lips from his, I kissed a line down his jaw to his neck.

  One of his hands came up, cupping the back of my head.

  It tightened as I drew a line down, down, down, stopping when I hit the V-neck of the sweater he wore under a heavy work coat. Pulling away, I shoved the coat from his shoulders, then caught the hem of the sweater. He had to help me drag it the rest of the way off, leaning back up against the door once we let it fall to the floor.

  I pressed my mouth to his chest and the muscles jerked under my lips. His breathing sped up, and against my lips, I could feel the rapid beat of his heart.

  “Raye…”

  The sound of my name on his lips was incredibly erotic, so guttural and rough, and I shivered against him.

  He closed a hand over my hip and dragged me closer.

  Against my belly, I felt the hard press of his cock, and I whimpered, wiggling against him, but when he went to pull at my clothes, I caught his hands and urged them back to his sides.

  “My turn,” I said stubbornly.

  He closed his hands into fists, but closed his eyes and nodded, his fisted hands pressed against the door at his back. I kissed a path down his torso, lingering over each tattoo I came across. As I went lower, I bent my knees, kneeling in front of him. When I tugged his jeans open, his entire body went rigid, and his hands moved to my shoulders, squeezing tight. “Raye…”

  “Shhh…”

  Leaning in, I kissed him through the heather-gray material of his boxers. His cock jumped, pulsing against my touch. I grabbed the waist of his jeans and dragged the thick denim down to mid-thigh, then tugged his boxers lower, freeing his cock. After a quick glance upward, I swayed closer and took him in my mouth.

  A muttered curse escaped him.

  One hand cupped the back of my neck.

  He was thick, stretching my mouth as I took him inside, but I kept going until the head butted against the back of my throat. Then I stopped and slowly withdrew, running my tongue over the heavy vein, sucking on him as I pulled back.

  A low noise escaped him as I started the process all over again.

  By the third stroke, he was moving against my mouth, one hand cupping my face, strangely gentle, while the other held the back of my neck. He no longer leaned against the door. Instead, he hovered over me and rocked into me with each forward movement I made.

  He spoke, but the words were low, almost nonsensical, a series of syllables and grunts and disjointed words that still somehow managed to turn me on even more.

  “Yeah…with your…right…fuck, Raye…”

  I took him as deep as I could when he swelled in my mouth, gripping his hips and holding him in place. Lodged against the back of my throat now, his cock pulsed and jerked, and I swallowed, eager for more.

  “I’m going to come,” he said, trying to pull me off.

  I sucked on him and began to move faster.

  Between my thighs, liquid heat gathered, and I squirmed, desperate to relieve the ache building inside me, but there was no way in hell I was going to stop what I was doing.

  Something salty filled my mouth, and Kane grunted.

  “Last chance, Raye,” he warned me.

  I slowed down and slid him a look, staring up at him over the length of his body before drawing him back into my mouth once more. Slow, teasingly.

  He groaned and slid a hand between us, fisting his cock. His hand bumped up against my mouth, but as he began to pump himself, I decided I didn’t mind. He held me in place with his hand at the base of my neck, and I knew this was the most erotic thing I’d ever experienced, him fisting himself while I held the head of his cock in my mouth, kneeling still fully clothed in front of him.

  A wash of fluid hit the back of my tongue. Reflexively, I swallowed, then swallowed again as another rush of it followed. Kane kept pumping. I swallowed again, and he let go of his cock to grab my head in both hands, pumping his dick in and out of my mouth.

  The sheer eroticism of it was enough to stun away any wariness I might have felt at being held so tightly, and when his hands fell away, I felt off-balance, cut adrift from the things that had held me centered.

  But I wasn’t adrift for long.

  Kane pulled me up and spun me around, crowding me up against the door as he busily pulled at my clothes.

  It seemed like it took him mere seconds to get me naked and then he was on his knees in front of me, my ass in his hands as he tilted my hips forward and pressed his mouth to me.

  I g
asped, then cried out, startled as he buried his tongue inside me.

  His hands tightened on my ass, and he tugged me closer, groaning against me.

  I was closer to the edge than it should have been possible and just a few jabs of his tongue against my clit had me hurtling dangerously closer to that precipice. Shuddering, I buried my hands in his hair.

  He bit my clit.

  With a cry, I bucked against him and came.

  He rose up and buried himself inside me, lifting me in his arms in seemingly one smooth motion. My back to the door, he rode me hard. Seeking his mouth with mine, I fisted my hands in his hair and urged him on.

  Mine…it was a thought that struck me with near giddiness, as he thrust deep inside, as if seeking the heart of me.

  I clung to him with legs and arms as the thought reverberated through me. Mine.

  The orgasm hit us, nearly at the same time. One second, I was straining toward it, then I was falling over. Then, with a shudder, Kane drove into me one last time and groaned, his cock pulsing as he emptied himself.

  He dropped his head onto my shoulder, the two of us both trembling and panting for air.

  I didn’t mean to say it. Not out loud. But as I clung to his wide shoulders with one arm, the fingers of my free hand playing through his hair, I heard myself whisper, “Mine.”

  Kane heard it, too.

  He lifted his head and looked down at me, eyes glittering.

  “Yours, huh?”

  I blushed. I could feel how bright red I must have gone, simply by the rush of heat that stung my cheeks. But I didn’t look away or try to take it back. I lifted my chin and stared into his eyes. “That a problem?”

  He chuckled and lowered his head to rub his lips against mine. “If I’m yours, that makes you mine, doesn’t it?”

  “Yes.” His. The thought was almost dazzling, and I sighed in satisfaction as he pulled me closer.

  “Then…no. No problem.”

  39

  Kane

  A few hours later, we lay in bed, half entwined.