“You were trying to stand up for somebody you saw as a victim,” I reminded her. “That’s…well, I understand why you did it. Nobody did it for you.” I cupped her cheek in my hand, her skin soft and delicate against my work-roughened palms. “I’m sorry you didn’t have anybody decent to stand up for you. Maybe…hell, maybe if I wasn’t such a roughneck, it would have been easier for you to believe in me. That’s the kind of person you deserve anyway.”
She frowned at me.
I started to pull my hand away.
She caught it.
Without thinking about it, I closed my fingers around hers, forcing myself to keep going. “There are plenty of decent guys out there, Raye, guys who aren’t like the asswipe who hurt you. You need somebody like that, somebody who will be there for you and take care of you.”
And it was a bitch for me to understand now that I wanted to be that guy.
Not just for a little while, but for real. For good.
I wasn’t supposed to want that kind of thing, but here I was wanting it with Raye, of all people.
“What are you saying?” she asked. “You…I mean, I guess you don’t want to be that guy, huh?”
She gave me a wobbly smile and nodded, pulling her hand away from mine. “I understand. I mean, it’s not like this was supposed to be a relationship or anything, right?”
As she slid off the couch, I stared at her.
You don’t want to be that guy…
What was she, blind?
“Raye…”
She got to her feet and started for the door. “Look, like I said, I’m sorry about not believing you. And…thanks. You know, for listening. For everything.” She shot a look at me over her shoulder.
I caught up with her just as she went to pull the door open.
“Hold up.”
She didn’t listen, tugging on the handle.
I closed my hand over hers, keeping her from opening the door. “Turn around and look at me, Raye,” I whispered into her ear.
She hitched up her shoulder, but slowly, she did turn, still gripping the doorknob in one hand, her back pressed to the door, her eyes not quite meeting mine. “I should get going,” she whispered.
“In a minute.” I dipped my head and pressed my lips to the corner of her mouth. “I’m really not all that good with words. I think things and I know what I mean, but getting others to understand…that’s a different story entirely. But maybe…maybe this will help.”
I rubbed my lips against hers, using my tongue to tease the entrance of her lips until she opened for me with a moan.
Just before taking her up on that sweet offer, I paused to whisper, “If you think I don’t want to be that man, you’re mistaken. I just…maybe you deserve better, Raye.”
Her arms curled around my neck and she tugged me down close.
“Maybe you should let me decide.”
32
Raye
Kane’s eyes widened slightly, then his mouth was on mine. He cupped the back of my head, and there weren’t any nightmares as he pulled me up against him. I felt the hard, heavy weight of his chest, felt the muscled length of him and just…wanted.
Curling my arms around his neck, I strained to be closer, although there was no way I could be close enough.
His hands carefully peeled away every piece of clothing I wore and when he had me naked, I pushed him back and reached for the waist of his t-shirt, tugging at the tight material. He started to pull it off, but I smacked at his hands, surprising both of us. “I want to do it,” I said, meeting his gaze.
His hands fell limp to his sides, and he offered a crooked grin. “By all means.”
He stood there, utterly still as I began to strip him naked, starting with his shirt and working my way down to his booted feet before returning to tug at his belt and jeans.
Once I had him naked, I stood in front of him again and laid my hands on his chest.
Still nervous, I flicked a look up at him. “I’m really curious about all your tattoos…can I?”
“You can do whatever you want.”
The blunt answer, spoken in his rough voice, made my toes curl into the worn carpet. The phoenix rising from the ashes had been the first to catch my attention, but there were others. A dragon on the other shoulder, the two creatures facing like they were at war. Flames curled and twisted between them, a tiger peering through them to snarl at me.
Leaning in, I pressed my mouth to the tiger’s snarling face.
Kane cupped the back of my head, urging me on.
I kissed my way over to one flat male nipple and licked him.
His broad chest shuddered.
I made my way over to the other and did the same, then kissed a path up to his neck and bit him.
His body jerked.
Pulling back, I stared up at him. “No?”
He shook his head and tugged me close again. “Yes. Like I said, you can do whatever you want.”
We ended up on the couch, me sprawled on top of him, our naked bodies perfectly aligned, but he made no move to take control from me as I kissed and explored his scarred, beautiful body. When I reached his cock, I slid off the couch to kneel next to him, darting a look up at him. Nerves anew flared in me as he reached down, closing a hand around his length.
“You do only what you want, Raye,” he said, voice gruff.
“I want to do this,” I told him. Then I leaned forward and pressed my mouth to the head of his cock, startled at how hot and smooth he felt against me.
A harsh noise escaped his throat, and I shot a look up at him.
His eyes were closed, head arched back, the veins in his neck standing out in furious, stark relief. Turning back to the task at hand, I opened my mouth more and licked him.
A breath stuttered out of him.
I felt his hand feather down my spine, then back up, but he made no other attempt to touch me.
“Raye…”
I glanced at him, but his eyes were still closed. He held his cock so that it pointed straight up, and I closed my mouth around the top, sucking a little.
Kane’s body arched up off the couch in a long, lean line, the muscles in his thighs and belly flexing.
“Fuck, Raye.”
His voice was grittier, rougher.
“I don’t know how to do this,” I said, telling myself not to feel embarrassed by it.
His lids lifted, and he met my eyes. “You’re doing it just fine. There’s not a right or wrong way.”
“But I…” I hesitated, then asked, “Show me how you like it?”
His chest expanded with a hard breath, then he nodded, gesturing for me to come closer. As I did, he cupped the back of my head.
I tensed at first, the echo of a memory washing up, but I shoved it back.
“We good?”
I nodded and rubbed my cheek against his length.
“You really don’t need my help with this,” he muttered. Then he cleared his throat. “Just…take me in.”
I opened my mouth and took him inside, moved up, then down, following the guidance of his hand. After a few strokes, his hand fell away, and he went back to gripping his cock. I felt his hand shift and pulled back, watched as he cupped and squeezed his balls.
“You keep looking at me like that, and I’m going to come from that alone.”
“You like me watching you?”
“I don’t know if like is the word,” he said ruefully. “But my dick sure as hell likes the attention.” His gaze dropped to my mouth, and he added, “But it likes your mouth more.”
I leaned back in and kissed the head, opening to take him back in, moving slower as I learned the taste and feel of him. When he hit the back of my throat, I slid back up. Each time I went down, I discovered I could take him deeper, and soon, I had him rocking up to meet me, muttering and swearing under his breath.
I didn’t need any more encouragement after that. I knew he was loving everything I did, and more, I was enjoying it, too.
I was wet, growing wetter, and found myself clutching at his thighs, my nails biting in as I squirmed and clenched my knees together to still the ache inside me.
“Stop!” he demanded abruptly, his voice ragged.
I pulled back, staring at him in confusion. “What?”
“I’m going to come in about five seconds if you keep it up.”
“Oh.” I blinked, understanding dawning. “Um…”
He sat up, then rose, holding out a hand to me. I let him pull me to my feet, leaning against him and just enjoying the feel of him.
He swept me up into his arms, and I gasped, startled.
“Bed,” he said, dipping his head to kiss me.
He carried me through the small apartment, and we ended up in the bed, but when he went to roll over and pull me on top of him, I shook my head. I wanted to bury the demons once and for all. “Come here,” I said, pulling him on top of me.
I gasped at the feel of his weight pushing me into the mattress, at the feel of his cock burning my belly like a brand.
“Raye…” He caught my face in his hands, dipping his head to kiss me, and at the touch of his mouth on mine, I forgot everything but his kiss.
Lost in that, I didn’t even notice him reaching for a condom until he pulled back to roll it on. I sat up and tugged it away from him. “Let me.”
It was awkward, yet another new thing for me, but he was patient. Or at least he pretended to be. I could see the fine tremors of his muscles as I smoothed it down into place. Once I was done, I shot him a look. “That right?”
He made a few adjustments as I laid back down.
I felt naked, overly exposed but not for long. He covered me, his weight a warm, heavy blanket covering every inch of me in his security. He cupped the back of my head and said, “Open for me, Raye.”
I did, and he slid his tongue into my mouth. The taste of him filled me, and I closed my mouth around him the way he did when I kissed him. He growled against my mouth, the sound rumbling all the way down to vibrate against my breasts. I shivered and arched against him, drawing him closer to me.
He rocked his hips against me, and I felt the press of his cock.
I widened my thighs.
“You ready?”
I nodded, surprised he even had to ask.
I gasped as he entered me, feeling him stretch me. Grasping his biceps, I arched up against him, desperate for more. I looked in his eyes, struggling for the words to tell him. That was when I saw the shuttered expression in his gaze and realized that he was holding back.
He’d always been holding back with me. Always been so careful.
I rose up and pressed my lips to his chin. “Make love to me, Kane,” I whispered, using my knees to squeeze his hips.
He shuddered inside me, and I felt his cock jerk.
Instinctively, my muscles clenched around him, and a groan stuttered out of his throat.
His cock jerked again, and it tore a moan out of me. I clamped around him again, tighter this time and another low noise escaped him. “Stop doing that,” he said, voice ragged.
“I can’t help it. You feel so good.”
He tensed inside me, then abruptly surged back and drove into me harder. A startled shriek escaped me, and he froze. “Raye?”
“Do it again…”
He did, each thrust strong and full and deep.
By the third one, I was shaking.
By the fifth, chills wracked my entire body.
And he had me coming by the seventh, wiggling and pumping against him as he drove into me. I clung to him and still, he moved.
The pleasure built inside me again, and I reached up, burying my hands in his hair. He came to me when I pulled him down, his mouth meeting mine.
The kiss was wet, wild, and deep, a little bit crazed, and I thought maybe I could die right there and go happy.
Kane rolled onto his back and pulled my hand until I straddled him. “Ride me,” he said, gripping my hips and guiding me into the right rhythm. I found it easier this time, bracing my hands on his chest and staring down at him.
His head fell back, and he watched me with hooded eyes, his lips parted, harsh flags of color dotting his cheeks. I raked my nails down his chest, and he hissed out a breath, arching under me in pleasure.
His cock swelled inside me, the head passing over that spot deep inside.
Pleasure exploded, and I cried out, sinking my nails into his skin as the orgasm sank into me.
Dimly, I was aware of Kane rocking up and grabbing me, plastering me against him, his mouth covering mine in a deep, rough kiss.
When it was over, I collapsed against him, mindless, breathless…feeling more complete than I had in my entire life.
33
Kane
I came awake with a warm, soft body tucked up against mine.
The familiar scent wrapped around me and a smile lit my face before I was even fully aware.
Raye.
She’d spent the night.
More, I got the feeling she’d be spending a lot of nights from here on out.
It was an idea I found very appealing.
Against my side, she mumbled under her breath, then stretched and shifted against me, reminding me that we’d fallen asleep naked. Not that I needed much of a reminder. Her breasts pressed into my side, and with every breath she took, they rose and fell against me.
Rolling onto my side, I stroked a hand down her hip.
Her eyes stayed closed.
I eased her onto her back, studying her in the faint light filtering in through the one small window in my room. That faint light gilded her skin with gold as I settled between her thighs, pressing my mouth to the crease where her leg and hip joined.
She stirred underneath me. Easing my mouth closer to the curls shielding her cunt, I murmured her name.
She stirred again.
But she didn’t wake up.
Not even when I flicked my tongue against her clit.
Okay, then.
I nuzzled the folds between her thighs and found her wet. Licking deeper into her center, I returned to her clit, sucking it into my mouth, taking it with my teeth.
A low moan escaped her, and a hand curled around my neck.
Darting a look up her sweet body, our eyes met, hers still hooded with sleep and now…passion.
“You finally going to wake up and join the party?”
A drowsy smile curled her lips. “Depends…you going to keep that up?”
Instead of answering out loud, I flicked her clit again.
She shivered and thrust herself against me. I loved it when she did that. Guiding both of her hands to my hair, I urged her on until she was rocking up, all but fucking my face with each thrust of her hips, each wiggle of her pelvis.
She came with a low whimpering sound that I felt all the way down to my balls.
Just as I started to crawl up from my place between her thighs, though, there was a knock at my apartment door. My apartment door…meaning somebody from the garage was knocking.
“Shit.”
She laughed against my mouth as I froze, all ready to bury myself inside her and get lost for a little while.
“Make whoever it is go away,” she suggested, her eyes sparkling as she stared at me. She looked happier than I’d ever seen her, and the sweetness of her expression made my heart flip over in my chest.
“I’ll do that.” I dropped a quick hard kiss on her mouth and got up, grabbing a pair of jogging pants from the foot of the bed, hauling them up over my hips before leaving to deal with the person at the door.
But one look through the peephole told me I wouldn’t be returning to bed with Raye. “Hold on,” I called through the door. Then I went back to the bedroom and peered inside. “Raye…it’s my kid brother, Austen. I’m going to need to talk to him.”
She sat up, staring at me. “Oh. Of course.” Her cheeks flushed as she looked around. “I…I think my clothes are out there.”
“I’ll get them.??
? I fetched the various pieces of clothing and brought them to her.
“I’ll wait in here until–”
I caught her face and craned it up to mine. “No. You’re not waiting in here. Get dressed. Come out.”
Raye’s cheeks blushed that delectable, delicate pink and I kissed her once more, gentle and slow. “My brother knows what sex is, Raye. I’m not worried about him knowing about us.”
“Oh.” She nodded, a tentative smile curling her lips.
As I turned to go greet him, I wondered if she had any idea how different a thing this was for me. Because I didn’t let women spend the night. I didn’t introduce women to my family.
But I wanted Raye to get to know mine.
She’d gone and changed everything.
Austen and I were at the kitchen table when she emerged a few minutes later, wearing the same clothes from last night, a nervous smile on her pretty face.
I’d told Austen she was there, and he’d grinned at me. “That’s great.”
Now, as she drew closer to the table, my brother got up and held out his hand. “Hi, I’m Austen. We didn’t really have a chance to meet last night.”
“Raye,” she said, her voice soft.
I’d risen the moment she came out of the bedroom, and now I nudged a chair out from under the table with my foot. “Want a seat?” I asked.
“I…well, you two are talking. Maybe I could make some breakfast?”
Austen darted a look at me. “I didn’t eat before I left. I could eat.”
“I can make cereal,” I said shortly. “Raye, you don’t need to wait on us.”
“I’m kind of hungry,” she hedged. “And there’s no making cereal. You pour milk on it.”
“It’s one of my number one kitchen skills,” I told her.
“I’m highly adept at it myself, but I’ve got a few other talents.” She back-stepped, then cut around me.
I groaned at the mental image of my mostly bare fridge.
“Well…you’ve got…cheese. And eggs. Omelets?”
My belly rumbled. “Fine. If you’re going to insist on cooking.”