*CHAPTER VI*
*A CELEBRATION WITH FIREWORKS*
The next morning, bright and early, the porter came down to Billy's roomwith a queer looking box made of heavy slats. One side of the box wasoff and the porter carried it in his hand. Setting the box down withthe open side towards Billy, the porter put an extra bunch of carrots init, and Billy, never having seen anything like this before, walked rightin and began to eat his breakfast, upon which the porter quickly slappedon the side of the box and nailed it tight. Billy did not realize thathe was trapped until the porter and another man whom he called liftedthe box and began to carry it up the stairs. Then Billy was angry inearnest. He jumped and jerked as much as he could and nearly threw themen down-stairs by his bouncing. As soon as they got up on the levelground, however, the porter and the other man began to shake the crateas hard as they could, so that, in place of Billy doing the bouncing, hewas being bounced until he had plenty of it and was glad to lie down onthe floor of the crate and hold still, while he was being carried to abig dray that stood in waiting.
While it was being loaded on the dray, Mr. Brown and Frank came out inthe courtyard to see him.
"Isn't he a beauty, papa?" said Frank. "And he behaves himself sonicely, too. I've been down to see him every other day and he's just asnice and quiet as he can be."
"I don't know," said his father, shaking his head. "I don't believethat a goat able to stir up as much trouble as he did back in thevillage where we bought him will be anything but a scamp goat to the endof his days. I'm really sorry that I bought him. It's going to cost alot of money, too, to send him by express from here to Havre and to payhis passage over to America. I have a big notion to turn him loose."
When Billy heard that he was frightened, and, turning his solemn eyesaround to Mr. Brown, he "baahed" as pitifully as he could.
"Just hear that, papa," said Frank, "he wants to go with us. He likesus."
"Oh, very well," said Mr. Brown. "But come, we must hurry up. We haveonly a few minutes to make our train."
As soon as Mr. Brown and Frank had walked away, the driver of the wagoncracked his whip, the horses started up, and Billy was rapidly taken tothe depot. Here he was loaded into an express car, and in a few momentsmore was headed toward France at as swift a pace as the engine couldpull the train. The express messenger in the car, as soon as his workwas done, lit a short black pipe and commenced teasing Billy. Reachinghis hand between the slats, he suddenly poked Billy in the ribs, andBilly, already nervous from the rapid motion, jumped straight up off hisforefeet. Of course his horns hit the top of the box and pained him.The man laughed at the funny motion and poked the goat again. Thistime, Billy, afraid to jump up, merely danced, and the man laughedaloud. Again and again he repeated his trick until the goat was nearlyfrantic. Billy tried to burst out the side of his cage so that he couldget at the man, but the crate was too stout for him to do it any damageand he only hurt himself by trying, so after a while he gave it up.
At the next stop they made, however, the express agent, while he wastaking on the parcels, slammed a heavy box on top of the crate. Billyheard the timbers crack and felt the box giving end-wise a trifle. Fora moment he was afraid that the heavy box would break down his crate andsqueeze him flat underneath it, but as soon as the train had startedagain the messenger moved the box into the far end of the car and Billywas delighted to find that at last the boards on one side of his prisonwere loosened. The messenger had laid aside his glowing pipe at thisstop, but now he took it up again, although smoking was against therules, and came over to tease Billy. He had no more than thrust hishand through than Billy lurched his body sideways as hard as he couldagainst the boards, and out he tumbled.
He was on his feet as quick as a cat and made a jump at the man. Theexpress agent dodged him and ran to the far end of the car, huntingwildly for something with which he might strike the angry goat. Billywas up to him before he had time to find anything, however, and chasedhim from one end of the car to the other. At last the man stopped infront of the big box that he had taken on at the last station, andwaited for Billy to jump for him. When Billy jumped, he sprang asideand let the goat plunge head first into the side of the box, breakingopen one of the boards and hurting his head considerably. By this timethe man was at the other end of the car and laughing. Billy ran afterhim again, but this time he knew the man's ways. When he started tododge back from the other end of the car, Billy also turned like a flashand was right after him. This time he got him and gave him a bump thatsent the man sprawling headlong on the floor. As the man went down, hisarm gave a jerk and his lighted pipe went through the hole that Billyhad butted in the big box.
Dodged him and ran to the far end of the car.]
The man was just scrambling to his feet when a big, blue ball of fireshot out of the side of the box and scooted along his back. Billy hadwheeled to give the man another dose of his medicine, but just then abig ball of red fire hit him in the side and he, too, tried to hunt acorner. The box was full of fireworks that was being shipped for a lawnfete, and for the next few minutes there was the most exciting time thatever happened inside of an express car going at full speed.
Skyrockets and Roman candles, whistling bombs and silver fountains,flower-pots and pin-wheels filled the air, spitting and spluttering,popping about from one end of the car to the other, bouncing first offof the man and then off the goat. No place was safe. The side of thebox was soon burst open by the force of the explosions, and thefireworks came tumbling out at greater speed than ever.
Both Billy and the express agent were hit until they were bruised andburned and sore all over. Billy had a great deal of his hair singed offand the express agent's face was as black as a coal-miner's. The smokebecame so thick that they could scarcely see, and it smarted and blindedtheir eyes until the express agent thought to open the side doors whenthe rapidly rushing wind swept in and carried away most of the smoke.
Luckily the car did not catch fire, though some of the goods that werebeing expressed did. The agent had a pail of drinking water in the carand as soon as the fireworks were nearly burned out he ran around fromone place to another using his water sparingly and beating out the firewherever he could.
Billy, too, seemed to know that burning things were dangerous, for whena bundle of rugs began to smoulder he jumped on the burning places andstamped them with his feet until the fire was beaten out. The expressagent saw him at this and he at once forgot his anger at the goat.Billy went scampering around after that, stamping out fire wherever hecould find a coal. After all danger was passed and the express man hadtidied up his car, he sat down puffing and looked at Billy.
"Well, Mr. Goat," said he, "we've had a busy time of it and I guess we'dbetter be friends. Don't you tell on me and I won't tell on you. Idon't want to let anybody know that I was smoking a pipe anyhow. It'sagainst the rules of the company."
"Baah!" said Billy, and that's all the talk they had about it. Afterthat they had no further trouble except that the express agent tried tocoax Billy back into his crate, but had to give it up as a bad job.
It was night when the train bearing Billy Mischief drew into Paris.Billy could not be coaxed or driven back into his cage, so, when thetrain stopped, the express messenger had another man come in to helphim. Between them they managed, after a hard struggle, to get Billy inthe crate, but as they were trying to fasten the lid on he burst out ofit, jumped out of the car door, ran as hard as he could and soon wassafe from pursuit and alone in the streets of Paris.
With a natural instinct to hide from the men who wanted to put him inthat close, uncomfortable box, he turned into the alley-ways and dark,narrow streets and for a long time ran on without meeting anyone. Butthis sort of thing was not very much to Billy's liking. He wanted tosee all the excitement that there was, so by-and-by he turned into oneof the broad, brilliantly lighted streets, where he trotted alongsedately, minding his own busin
ess and looking around him curiously atthe gayly dressed throngs. A great many people turned round to lookafter him and laugh, he trotted along so solemnly.
All this time there was great excitement at the railroad station. Mr.Brown had left word that his goat was to be held until the next night'strain to Havre as he intended to spend a day in Paris, but the expressdepartment had no goat to hold, so the matter was reported to the policedepartment, and within a few moments all the red-trousered gendarmes ofParis were looking for a mischievous white goat with freshly singedspots on his shiny coat.
One of these gendarmes, soon after he had received his instructions,found Billy and a big stray Tom cat eyeing each other with everyintention of immediate war. Billy had never spoken to a cat before andso when he saw this strange animal on the street he walked straight upto it and said "baah!" He intended to mean something like our "Goodevening. It's pleasant weather, isn't it?" but Billy's voice at bestwas not a very gentle one and his long horns looked threatening, so thebig cat arched his back and bristled his hair and stuck his tailstraight up. Billy did not know much about cats but he could easily seethat this one meant fight, so he shook his head angrily. They werestanding in front of one of the pleasant Paris sidewalk cafes and agreat many ladies and gentlemen were seated at little round tables underthe broad awning.
Billy and a big stray Tom cat eyeing each other.]
Just as the gendarme recognized Billy by his singed coat, the cat letout an ear-splitting "meow!" and, jumping up, scratched Billy's facewith the sharp claws of both his forefeet; then it sprang up on one ofthe empty tables and down on the other side. Billy, smarting with thepain, jumped after him, upsetting the chairs on the other side with acrash. The express department had offered a good reward to whoevershould find Billy, so the gendarme took after the goat, overturning somemore chairs. The cat darted here and there and everywhere among thelittle round tables and Billy right after him. The cat ran under atable at which were sitting two gentlemen and two ladies, and Billy, nowso angry that he did not notice where he was going, forced his way rightafter him, upsetting the table, spilling the glasses and bottles upon itinto the laps of the ladies and making a tremendous noise. Table aftertable they overturned in this way.
Another gendarme, attracted by the hubbub, came up and saw Billy. He,too, gave chase, adding to the confusion. Everybody began to shove backtheir chairs. All of the people were either talking or laughing orscreaming at the top of their voices. Waiters came running, and one ofthem, a little excitable man with a funny little black mustache, triedto head Billy off. All he got for it was a good bump right in themiddle of his big white apron and he landed back against another waiterwho was bringing a big tray full of glasses. The two of them went tothe floor together in a noisy pile of tables and chairs, and Billydashed right on over them. This time, the cat, which was bewildered bythe crowd and had scarcely known which way to run, found an opening tothe street. Having a clear track, he would easily have gotten away fromBilly except that just at that moment a third gendarme saw the cat andthe goat coming and jumped square in the road of them.
The cat had tried to dart around him but the gendarme's legs came rightin his road, so the cat began to climb the gendarme, and Billy, comingup just then, made a dive head first at the cat, catching it just as theanimal reached the gendarme's lower vest button. The gendarme sat rightdown with a grunt to think things over, while the cat sprang for the topof a high fence and was over with a whisk of his tail. Billy could notclimb the fence so he ran back a piece and tried to butt it down, but hecould not do it. By this time the gendarme he had knocked down was onhis feet again, and two others came running up.
There were now five of the red-trousered little police soldiers afterhim, and things began to look very lively for Billy. They tried tosurround him but he ran through them, and all five of them chased afterhim up the street. At nearly every block they were joined by anothergendarme, so that before he had gone very far Billy was heading quite anarmy of French soldiers. To escape he turned down a dark street. Theywere digging a wide ditch across this dark street and the lights theyhad placed there as danger signals had been taken away by somemischievous boys. Billy, who could see well in the dark, perceived thisditch as he came to it and leaped lightly over it, but the excitedgendarmes who were following him could not see it, and the whole crowdof them fell headlong in the ditch, which, fortunately, was not yet deepenough to hurt them much.
Billy turned now into another well-lighted street. Here again he founda gendarme who, as soon as he saw and recognized Billy, started out tostop him. He went like a streak between this fellow's legs. Now hebegan to wonder why all of these little fellows in the red trousers weresuch enemies of his, and when, at the end of the block, he saw three ofthem standing in a row, he got angry. Shaking his head, he determined togive the big one in the middle the hardest bump he had ever given toanyone in his life. Lowering his head and shaking it, he went on as ifhe had been shot out of a cannon, and, as he drew near, gave a mightyjump and butted the big gendarme right in the stomach.
Alas for Billy! In place of the soft human figure that he thought hewas butting, it turned out that the gendarme in the middle was printedin glowing colors on paper and pasted against a solid brick wall, as anadvertisement for a play then performing at one of the theatres. Thetwo gendarmes who had happened to stand alongside of it were real,however, so when Billy dropped back stunned from his hard jolt the tworeal gendarmes promptly arrested him, and it was a very sick and sorrygoat that was shortly afterwards returned to the Express Department tobe held for the Havre train.