Read Both Ways Page 23


  “Thank you all for coming to this special event on this extra special day. The day we celebrate the birth of Christ is the day we rejoice in the incarnation of God and the idea that God loved people so much that He stepped toward us, knowing we could never step toward Him. God became flesh and blood in the person of baby Jesus. And it is an important reminder for the occasion we celebrate today. For God loves a man and a woman so much that He doesn’t want them to dwell alone. He actually said it wasn’t good, back in Genesis, and so He selects a person - flesh and blood, to fill that void. Not just the idea of a soulmate, not just the dream of a husband or a wife - but the real thing. A man - with all his weaknesses and quirks and peculiar smells - and a woman - complete with funny habits, rituals and routines. Real people, used by God, to fulfill the life of another, and, at the same time, fulfill their own.”

  Madison then directed his full attention to the bride and groom and said, “David Bean, do you take this woman to be your wife, to have and to hold from this day forward? To love her, honor her, respect and cherish her, to remain faithful to her and her alone as long as you both shall live?”

  “I do.”

  He repeated the same charge to Shani, who she looked down at her daughter, who was distracted by her own little bouquet, smelling the flowers and picking at the baby’s breath. Shani smiled and looked back up at the Pastor, “I do.”

  “A vow is a sacred thing. It is your word before God. It is a sacred oath. What we are about to do is logged and recorded by God. It is a personal commitment of life, for life. It’s not to be entered into lightly or without due consideration, but reverently. Having given yourself to prayer concerning this union, and feeling, as you both do, the peace of God in your hearts for this decision, I ask you to repeat these vows. David, please place the ring upon Shani’s finger and repeat after me: I David... take thee Shani... to be my wife... to have and to hold... from this day forward... in plenty and in want... in sickness and in health... to love you and remain faithful to you... as long we both shall live... before God and these witnesses... Amen.”

  The congregation was silent, listening and reciting every word quietly, reverently. As in most ceremonies, there were couples in attendance that had lost the spark of passion and some of the sacredness of the vows, and, for them, as they sat there holding hands, something spiritual always happened. For Madison Enright, who had repeated these words more times than he could remember, the weight of their personal application was lost. But to his wife, sitting in the front row watching him work, they were as real as when she first repeated them, standing before her father, looking into the eyes of her young blond husband-to-be. Tears formed and began to run down her cheeks as she wondered if her husband still felt the intensity of the vow he made that day in Ponca City, Oklahoma. She did, and whispered them again before God to confirm her allegiance.

  Dawn Neilson sat in the back of the sanctuary during the service, overseeing each detail, but, even though single, she wasn’t immuned to the power of the vows and the paradox of what she heard and felt. She felt increasingly pressured to say something about Pastor Enright, yet struggled to know what to say that wouldn’t ruin the great relationships and personal renewal that was going on in her life. She couldn’t talk to Dave and Shani, he was the pastor’s best friend. She couldn’t talk to her new best friend, she was the Pastor’s wife, and Dan and Julie worked for him, so they were out. Greg and Terry Page were the only reasonable choices, but talking to anyone would certainly start a ball rolling that she knew wouldn’t stop until she were pushed out of the church and out of relationships with all of her new, dear friends. She couldn’t decide what to do - do nothing and hope she could withstand what she perceived as increasing advances, or tell someone and know she would come out on the losing end, as always. No easy answer.

  The guitarist began Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring after the pronouncement and kiss, and Dave, Shani and Franny started walking up the aisle toward Dawn. They all embraced at the back of the sanctuary. “Dawn, thank you so much, that was so beautiful. You are amazing, an amazing friend,” Shani said.

  “You do the same for me someday, okay?” Dawn said. “It was beautiful. You are beautiful, the most beautiful bride of all time!”

  “I agree,” Dave said, holding Franny and kissing Shani again as people began descending on them, pressing them into the foyer for hugs and kisses and pictures. Shani had family come in from all over the state, and some of Dave’s old employees made the trip, which was an unexpected surprise.

  “Man, it’s great to see you guys. Can you believe this?”

  “No. Not at all. That’s why we had to come,” one of his former employees said. Another chimed in, “We had to come see it with our own eyes. Way to go bro!” he cheered, giving Dave some Hawaiian hand sign he assumed meant something good.

  Madison and Jill were the last to leave the sanctuary, with the exception of Terry Fields who was in charge of locking up.

  “That was beautiful, Mad,” Jill said as they walked slowly up the aisle through the dimness of the room.

  “They’re going to make a great couple,” he said.

  “The vows were really powerful.”

  “You think?”

  “To me they were.”

  After a brief reception where Billy and Franny ate way too much cake and Franny spilled red punch all over her wedding dress, Madison and Jill bid the group goodbye and headed back to their house so Jill could rest. She sat with her eyes closed, her head leaning back against the grey leather headrest. Billy was asleep before they exited the parking lot. He would wake up long after they had arrived home, sprawled out on the back seat of his dad’s car, a position he’d awakened to many times, since he got too big to be carried into the house.

  Madison’s mind was busy trying to formulate an approach. “Jill?”

  “Mmm.”

  “Didn’t you think the ceremony was beautiful? All those burgundy and white roses, and the lighting and flow and everything?”

  “One of the best we’ve had, I think,” she whispered, eyes still shut.

  “I wanted to bounce off of you. Do you think it’s about time the church hired an event coordinator and designer? You know, now that we have the new building and all.”

  “I don’t know, hadn’t thought about it.”

  “Well. What do you think about Dawn Neilson? She seems to have a real knack for these things. It was just a thought.”

  The idea hit Jill on several different levels, some good, some not so good.

  “Hmm. Let me think about it.”

  “What’s there to think about? Is it a good idea?” Jill opened her eyes and looked at her husband, it wasn’t like him to snap at her.

  “Mad, It’s a good idea, I just want some time to process it, that’s all.”

  “Well I want to do it. I think the church needs it,” he said, looking straight ahead with an irritated expression that suggested to Jill that her opinion was important, so long as it agreed, instantly, with his.

  “Mad. Are you all right?”

  “Why do you say that? Of course I’m all right. It’s just frustrating when I share an idea, and you immediately shoot it down.”

  “I did not shoot it down. I just said I wanted to think about it. Man, you’re touchy.” She turned toward the window and didn’t say anything else on the ride home.

  Chapter 73

  January was a whirlwind of activity. Madison was spending equal time between home and the office, handling most of the taxi duties for Billy while his mother was carefully navigating her eighth month. The baby was in good health, and it looked like she may make it to term. The time set for Madison to leave for Dallas was quickly approaching, and they began discussing whether he should cancel the trip to stay home with Jill. Jill even spoke with Dr. Penquay about the possibility of having the baby caesarian so she would be able to go to Dallas with her husband.

  “Jill, you and I both know that the little life inside you is much more im
portant than any conference in the world. Her health is paramount. So, no. I would not advise rushing delivery in any way in order to keep a schedule. Put the idea out of your mind. The baby will come when she is ready. There is nothing at this time, physically, that would force a caesarian operation. Now, if she decides to stay in there, maybe a week or two or three too long, then we’ll talk about it,” the doctor said.

  “Mmm,” she said, holding her bare belly in the exam room, “don’t even talk like that. I can’t carry this weight one day longer than term - she’s got to know that.” Jill spoke directly to her tummy, “Little Dawna, I know you can hear me. If you love me, come out on time. Not a day later - please!”

  “No caesarean then,” the doctor said.

  “Okay,” patting her tummy, “we’ll tough it out.”

  Chapter 74

  Dave and Shani returned from their delayed honeymoon in Maui to the news that the church had hired Dawn Neilson as event coordinator. The hiring came against the better judgment of Jill Enright. But Paula Stone, who did the hiring on recommendation of her boss, was impressed by Dawn’s style and sense of organization. Paula thought she would be a great addition to the team, and after hearing her testimony, thought it would also be a great witness to the church body of how God raises up those who are down and sets them in places of responsibility as they are faithful to His calling on their lives. The weekend before Madison and Jill were supposed to leave for Dallas, Steve Franz was in church on Saturday night, holding a place, as usual of late, for his increasingly serious girl friend, Paula Stone. She came to sit down a few minutes before the service started, nudging him to advise him of her presence as his eyes were trained on the stage.

  “Hey, you.”

  “Oh, hi.” He leaned over and gave her a peck on the cheek. “Hey Paula, who’s that on the stage working with the arrangements?”

  “Wouldn’t you like to know? I saw you gawking at her.”

  “No. I think I know her, that’s all.”

  “It’s Dawn Neilson. We just hired her to do event coordination, room decoration, design, that kind of thing. She’s really good at it. Where do you know her from?”

  “She works, or worked, I guess, at the Starbucks where I first interviewed Pastor Enright. Very interesting.”

  “What?”

  “We’ve got to talk. Tonight, okay?”

  Chapter 75

  Madison was torn between going to Dallas alone and staying home with Jill. His morning emails with Judy Turnbull had gradually picked up again after their brief encounter at the Marriott, and, while he never told her he was going to Dallas, it was nearly impossible to resist arranging a meeting. He did resist, though, and awarded himself extra nobility points for strength in the face of temptation. Judy was leading him on like a horse chasing a carrot, flirting and sending occasional photos of herself with others, never overly seductive, but sexy enough to know his reaction would be desire.

  Jill had finally decided to forego Dallas and stay home near her doctor and the hospital. It was a difficult decision since this was her husband’s big stage, and she wanted to be there with him more than anything. But Dr. Penquay’s advice was too sound - the baby was more important in every way. Besides, she wasn’t due for another two weeks, and Madison was only going to be gone for three nights. He would be back in plenty of time to attend the big event. She had arranged for Dawn to stay with her and Billy while Madison was gone in case there were any emergencies, which she didn’t expect, but felt would be both fun and a great chance to finish the nursery. Plus, she and Billy both loved Dawn’s cooking, which was an added bonus.

  Chapter 76

  “Paula, do you trust me?” Steve said, holding her hand across the familiar table at Hershel’s Deli.

  “Not completely,” she smiled.

  “I appreciate your honesty,” he laughed. “But I want to tell you, in all sincerity, that you can. You can trust me.”

  “Okay. You’re scaring me now.”

  “I need to tell you what I’ve been doing for the past month or two, pretty much since that Family Series thing where you introduced me to your church.”

  “Oh, so whatever you’ve gotten yourself into is my fault.”

  “You are too sharp. I didn’t mean it like that. Let me try and explain this as clearly and simply as I can.” Steve began to recount the story, beginning with playing his hunch after the initial interview and trailing the Pastor’s car. He left out, for now, the bag he found in the McDonalds’ men’s room after he and Paula’s steak dinner. Paula had pulled her hand back to herself and was sitting, stone faced as he talked. When Steve finished, Paula’s first response was a selfish one.

  “Steve, I’m not sure about our relationship. I need to know if you are telling me this stuff as my boyfriend or as a reporter. Because this is blindsiding me, and I’ve got to decide whether or not to deck you, to storm out of the Deli, or talk rationally about what you’ve just said. Help me out with that part, the me and you part, for a minute.” Paula was struggling. She was too rational and smart to overreact, but she wanted to. She wanted to storm out, to hit him, to defend her Pastor and her church, but she held back, because she thought she just might be falling in love with this guy and what he was saying just might be true.

  “Paula. My relationship with you is totally separate. I’ve been falling for you for years, it’s just been recently, while working together, that I’ve realized it. If I thought there was any way to protect us and not tell you this stuff, believe me, I would do it. But it seems like something is happening, and you are right in the middle of it, and I just wanted you to know. I thought I owed that to you.”

  “So you’re not just dating me to get close a possible story?”

  “Would have never crossed my mind. I just noticed some behavior in him that triggered my senses, and I followed them. I wish they would have led me somewhere else, trust me, but it is what it is. You and I happened along the way, and I don’t want to lose that. I hope you can understand.”

  “He’s been stalking this woman, and then he gets me to hire her? Do you think she knows? Do you think they are having an affair?” Questions were swirling through her mind, she just could not see her friend and Pastor acting like this, she’d seen no signs of it herself, at least not that she noticed. Although he had told her, in an executive meeting that he wanted input from her and Dan about relaxing the dress code around the office, letting the staff wear jeans and shorts through the summer if they wanted, that could relate somehow, but that was pretty weak, she thought. She mentioned it to Steve who nodded and bit his lip.

  “Makes sense. He’s fantasizing about her. He wants her close enough to see every day, to get his fix, so to speak. She’s probably too close to the operation for an affair. Either that or she’s a better actor than he is, because she isn’t giving off any signals at all.”

  “We need to talk to her,” Paula said. “Because, if she’s part of this, I’ve got to get rid of her before all this hits the fan.”

  “Okay. That’s your call. If you want me there, fine. If not, fine.”

  Paula took a deep breath, “You’re not printing any of this, are you?”

  “No. There’s nothing to print. As far as I’m concerned, this is just a housekeeping issue... but, Paula, behavior is a funny thing - you know it better than I do. This whole thing may go deeper.” He left that to stand in the air, knowing he would tell her no more tonight. She knew exactly what he meant. There could be others. That possibility hit her like a brick.

  She leaned in to control her volume and said, “But he’s a community leader. He’s an influential force in this region. He’s the Pastor of one of the largest churches in the area.”

  “And he’s just a man,” Steve added. “He’s a good, wise man, but he’s just a man.” He paused, seeing the concern and confusion in her eyes. “Hey, Paula, it’s probably nothing. Let’s not make it bigger than it is. I just wanted to bring you up to speed after I saw Miss Neilson o
n stage tonight.”

  “Gawking at a single girl and then parking your car in view of her apartment two days a week, and then hiring her, is not ‘probably nothing’ - it’s ‘probably something.’ I just hope it’s not the ‘probably something’ that it appears to be,” she said and the atmosphere between them grew thick and quiet.

  “Now Steve, I am a girl, so should I hate you now, because I can’t help feeling a little used in all this,” Paula said, not completely seriously, but enough so that Steve considered his response.

  “There will be plenty of time to hate me, or... maybe even... love me some day. But let’s figure this out first. Deal?”

  “Love you? Is that what you just said?”

  “Or hate me... your choice.”

  “So, love you is an option?”

  “Did you ever consider law school?”

  “Funny.”

  “Paula, one more thing.”

  “Anything.”

  “I need his cell number.”

  Chapter 77

  Madison was scheduled to fly on Thursday morning, with the first session beginning at 7:00 p.m. Central Standard Time. Jill had a rough night and was up trying to sip a cup of tea as he got ready to go. Madison called Dr. Cross in Dallas and told him about Jill’s condition and that he was still considering the offer to back out of the conference. Dr. Cross had arranged for Raymond Culbert to attend the conference as a back-up speaker and assured Madison that it would be all right if he needed to stay home, even for part of the conference. Madison called Dave Bean at home and got the same encouragement.

  “Your place is right by the side of that bed, Mad. There will be other conferences, but a baby is only born once,” Dave said, lying with his new bride at his side, watching him lovingly.

  “Thanks man. I don’t know though, Jill and I are going to talk. If I end up going, keep an eye on her, will you?”

  “Absolutely. It’s your call.”

  Jill saw the concern in her husband’s eyes as he hung up from the second call. She didn’t want to be the one to burst this life-long dream, didn’t want to have to live with that hanging over their relationship if she could help it. And she really did think the baby would wait. She just needed to stay in bed and rest.