“Sorry,” I said, dropping the accent. “Harvey just left.”
“Careful,” she said. “Don’t want to forget who you really are.”
“Don’t be stupid,” I said. “I know who I am.”
“Hmm,” she said, sounding unconvinced. “How are things going with you and Mr. Wonderful?”
This was her latest nickname for Harvey. Hearing it grated on my nerves.
“He’s really not that bad, Rose, once you get used to him.”
“Well, you’ll have to forgive me,” she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “I never had the pleasure.”
For one strange instant, I imagined introducing Rose to Harvey. I almost laughed.
“Everything’s fine,” I said. “Have you been looking at the gossip papers?”
“Yup,” she said. “Every socialite in America is in mourning since some British chippy came across the pond and stole their favorite bachelor away.”
“It’s a good thing. It means it’s working.”
“Has he been paying you?” she asked.
“Yes, every week. My bank probably thinks I started dealing drugs.” I had more in my account than I’d ever had before. It was more than enough to get started on the life improvements I’d been dreaming of.
“Good,” she said. “Any idea how much longer he’s going to want you on the job?”
“Well, we’re getting closer, with this deal he’s working on. He said he’s hoping to announce the sale at his company’s anniversary celebration next month, so I would imagine I’ll at least be around until then.”
“What kind of celebration?” Rose asked.
“It’s a big deal,” I said. “Jenson Pace’s twenty-fifth anniversary. There are going to be a ton of important people there, reporters, that sort of thing. I’m already dreading what Susan is going to put me through to get ready for it.”
“That’s perfect!” Rose exclaimed.
“What’s—” I began, then stopped short when I realized what she was thinking.
“That’s the time to show everyone the sad little man behind the curtain!” she said. “You’ll just have to get onstage at some point, get a microphone, and BAM! Everyone knows that the great Harvey Pace is a liar and a loser who has to hire someone to pretend to love him.”
Her words made me feel sick.
“Yeah, maybe,” I said uncertainly.
“It’s the right time, Allie. You know it is. You’ll have a good nest egg saved, and I’m sure you’ll be more than ready to get away from him by then.”
Is that what I wanted? Something traitorous inside me wasn’t sure.
Rose went on.
“It’ll let us do maximum damage. The story will be everywhere. And every time someone remembers Jenson Pace’s twenty-fifth anniversary, they’ll remember you.”
“Yeah, they will,” I said.
“Then we’re agreed? You’ll make your move at the anniversary celebration?”
What could I say? I tried to think of one reason to say no that Rose would understand, and found that I couldn’t. She was right. If we wanted to hurt Harvey Pace, this was the way, and the gala was the time.
“Yes, alright,” I said at last. “At the anniversary event. I’ll tell everyone then.”
“I’m so proud of you, Allie,” Rose said.
“Thanks,” I said, feeling more ashamed of myself than I ever had before.
After I got off the phone, I picked up my sketch book and tried to work on my drawing, but found that my inspiration was gone. I’d told Harvey before that what I wanted most was to create beauty in the world, but there was nothing beautiful about what Rose and I were planning.
CHAPTER TEN
A few days later, I stood on the sun-soaked deck of Harvey’s yacht. He stood behind me with his arms wrapped around my shoulders. A warm wind blew against our faces and I breathed in lungfuls of fresh, sea-scented air. I leaned back against Harvey’s strong chest, my head tucked under his chin.
As Harvey had promised, the weather was perfect. Susan had chosen white, lightweight slacks and a navy blue sleeveless top for me to wear, along with simple canvas deck shoes and a soft, tan sweater that I could put on if the temperature cooled. My hair was fastened away from my face, and a new pair of designer sunglasses shielded my eyes from the bright sun that both shone down from above and reflected up from the water’s surface in blinding flashes. As usual, when all was said and done, I was glad of Susan’s help. The outfit she’d chosen was simple, but it fit in perfectly with what Marie Layton and Susan herself had chosen for the outing. If I’d tried to choose clothes on my own, I probably would have picked a sundress and sandals, and would have (accurately) looked as though I’d never been on board a yacht in my life. Even if I didn’t relish the experience of not being in control of my own appearance, I couldn’t deny that Susan Pace was excellent at what she did.
I may have managed to look the part, but I was struggling to maintain my happy girlfriend façade. Having a definite date planned for my betrayal of Harvey had made it real in a new way, and I found it was no longer easy to ignore how this game would end. I tried to hide my uneasiness, but Harvey noticed.
“What’s wrong?” he whispered, nuzzling his face against my hair.
“Nothing,” I said, my smile firmly in place. “All good.”
“You seem off, Alice,” he said. “People are going to notice.”
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’ll get it together.”
“Please do,” he said.
He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, and then left to check on the Laytons, who were sitting in the shade of the cabin sipping cool drinks.
“Is all well, Harvey?” Roger asked. I cursed inwardly when I realized that my act wasn’t even fooling the Laytons today.
“Perfectly,” Harvey said. “Alice gets a touch of motion sickness now and then, but I believe she’s starting to feel better. Is that right, dear?”
“Yes, quite,” I said, walking over to join them. “Just takes me a bit to get used to the motion of the vessel, but I’m fine now.”
“That’s good to hear,” Marie said. “I feel just terrible for people who can’t abide being at sea. All this loveliness, and they can’t enjoy it.”
“That really would be a shame,” Harvey said. “I love the water, and I’d hate not being able to share that with the woman in my life.” He lifted my hand to his lips and pressed a kiss against it.
Susan came out of the cabin then with a fresh drink. It was her third, or perhaps her fourth. I hadn’t interacted with her in a strictly social setting before; I wondered if she always drank this much. In any case, I didn’t think I was the only one who noticed. Harvey frowned at her briefly. She shrugged and looked him in the eye while taking a very pointed sip from her glass. Then, rather than joining the rest of us, she walked to the other side of the deck and stretched out on a chaise in the sun.
“Do you get out on the water much, Harvey?” Marie asked, pulling his attention back to the conversation at hand.
“Not nearly as much as I’d like,” he said. “You know how it is.”
“We certainly do,” Roger said. “But hopefully, soon, we’ll have more time for things like this. Maybe finally take the leap and get a vessel of our own, travel the world.”
Marie laughed.
“Don’t be silly, Roger,” she said. “It’s nice out here for a few hours, but days and days in that little cabin? Certainly not. And I could never be away too long from the children.”
“How many children do you have?” I asked.
“Five,” she said. “They’re all grown now, of course, and giving us grandchildren, which is wonderful.”
“I’m sure,” I said, and cast a quick glance at Harvey. As I hoped, Marie and Roger didn’t miss it.
“What about you, Harvey?” Roger said. “You’re not getting any younger. Going to get working on a family soon?”
It was exactly the direction we’d hoped to steer the conversati
on, but I still found myself blushing.
Harvey laughed and scratched at the back of his head in a nervous gesture.
“One step at a time, man,” he said, winking at me. “But yes, I do want a family.”
“You’ll love it,” Marie said to both of us. “I can’t imagine our lives without the children. Being footloose and single is great, but all the excitement and freedom in the world can’t compare to the experience of raising a family.”
“Can I ask how you two met?” I asked. “You’re such a lovely couple; you seem as though you’ve been together forever.”
Marie smiled and squeezed Roger’s hand.
“Not forever, but nearly,” she said. “I was sixteen when we met, and Roger was twenty. Of course, that sort of thing was more common back then. My parents made us wait until I was nineteen before they’d let us marry. They wanted to see Roger a bit more settled, and give me some time to change my mind. Not that there was ever any chance of that. I was smitten with Roger from the moment we met.” She sipped her drink and fanned herself with her wide-brimmed straw hat. “What about your parents, Alice? What do they think of this foreign affair?” She giggled at her own joke.
“Well, they’re glad that I’m happy, but parents are parents of course, and mine are rather old-fashioned. We’ll have to make at least one trip to England to beg their blessing before any kind of marriage talk will be heard by them,” I said.
Roger nodded in approval.
“As you should. A real man looks a girl’s father in the eye and asks for her hand, even if he’s shaking in his shoes the entire time.”
“Not long ago, I couldn’t imagine doing such a thing,” Harvey said. “It’s funny how quickly some things can change.” He looked at me as though he meant every word, and even though I knew better, his words warmed me.
“Good man,” Marie said, patting Harvey on the cheek. He received her approving touch as though he were an obedient child. I managed to hold back my laugh, but just barely.
“I’ll, uh, see if lunch is about ready,” he said, getting to his feet.
He disappeared into the cabin, leaving the rest of us to our cocktails and conversation.
~ ~ ~
Despite an awkward start, the day overall seemed a great success. We’d enjoyed a pleasant lunch on deck, and cruised around for a couple more hours. The scenery was gorgeous, and Susan even joined in with the group near the end of the trip for some light conversation. When we’d returned to dock, Roger and Marie had seemed in excellent spirits. Roger had shook Harvey’s hand heartily, and Marie had embraced me and kissed me on both cheeks, promising we’d get together again soon. For all appearances, Harvey and I, in one afternoon, had become great friends of theirs.
I was confused, then, when Harvey dropped me off at the curb late in the afternoon with a half-hearted “Goodnight.” Before I could ask him what was wrong, the car had driven off.
I went up to my apartment and took a shower to wash the sunblock and dried salt spray from my skin. I put on comfortable lounge clothes and stretched out on the couch with a book. I’d barely read five pages, though, when my weariness from a long day in the sun took its toll and I fell asleep with the book on my chest.
The room had fallen dark several hours later when the sound of my phone’s text alert went off– my real phone, not the one I carried for Harvey.
It was Rose.
Can you meet me tomorrow?
I sent back: I don’t know, why?
She replied: We need to talk details of our plan. Gotta make sure everything’s perfect for Harvey’s big night.
She typed a bunch of smiley faces after that.
I closed my eyes and lay back on the couch for a minute. Finally, I sat up and typed an answer.
Okay, let’s meet. When/where?
She responded with the name of a café on the other side of town and suggested we meet around noon. I confirmed that I’d be there.
~ ~ ~
As much as I looked forward to seeing Rose, I dreaded the topic of our meeting. I slept terribly all night, and when my alarm finally went off the next morning, I dragged myself out of bed, miserably tired. I went to the kitchen first and started the coffee, then trudged back to the bathroom for a long shower.
Getting showered and dressed made me feel a little better, at least physically. I applied makeup and styled my hair as Alice Clarke. The process that had intimidated me so much in the beginning was almost automatic now. My reflection in the mirror wasn’t strange anymore, either. This new woman, so alien a month ago, was feeling more and more like my true self.
What’s going to happen when I go back to who I was? I wondered. Will the old Alice feel like a stranger to me?
I drank coffee and ate a bagel while I watched the sun climb higher in the sky outside my apartment windows. I was taking the dishes back to the kitchen to wash when there was a knock on my door.
My first thought was that it was Harvey, but it wasn’t. It was a delivery man. More flowers.
My eyes filled with tears as I arranged the flowers – white lilies – in a vase on the table. I opened the note, then set it aside.
“Thank you for a beautiful day. Yours, Harvey.”
I sat down at the table for a moment, but found that I couldn’t stand to look at Harvey’s flowers, not today. I went into my rarely-used office instead and started up my computer. I opened my email, and found a message from my mom, sent a few days ago.
Hi, sweetie!
Your dad and I are thinking of you. How’s the job going? Getting enough sleep? Staying safe? Drop me a line or give me a call if you can. We miss you a lot. I know it’s early yet, but maybe you’ll make it up for the holidays this year?
Just wanted to let you know that we love you and we are SO PROUD of you. You’ve worked so hard, and we couldn’t be more pleased with the woman you’ve become.
Love,
Mom
I opened a window to reply, but couldn’t think of a thing to type. I stared at the blinking curser, my mom’s words playing over and over in my mind – “we are SO PROUD of you.” Would they be proud of what Rose and I were doing? As grieved and angry as they’d been about the foreclosure, I couldn’t imagine either of them condoning something so cruel, so ugly as what Rose and I were planning.
After a few minutes, I powered the computer down without sending a reply.
I tried to read while I waited until it was time to leave to meet Rose, but I couldn’t focus on the words on the page. When the clock finally said it was eleven, I put the book down and called for a taxi. As I was slipping on my jacket and picking up my purse, my phone rang. It was Harvey.
“Hello?” I said, hoping my voice sounded natural to him. My heart was pounding. Did he know where I was going? What I was doing?
There was a long pause before Harvey spoke.
“Alice,” he said, and then was quiet. His voice sounded wrong somehow.
“Yes, I’m here,” I said.
“I knew you’d be there,” he said. “You’re the only one who’s always there for me.”
I realized he was slurring his words, just a little.
“Are you okay, Harvey?”
“Nothing’s okay, Alice,” he said. “We all pretend it’s okay. You pretend, and I pretend, and I pay you to pretend… Susan won’t pretend. She knows it’s not okay.”
I’d never heard him talk this way before. I’d never seen him even slightly drunk, if that’s what he was now. Something inside me said that something was terribly wrong with him.
“Harvey, where are you right now? Are you at the office?”
“No, I’m no good there, not today,” he said.
“So you’re at home?”
“Yes,” he said.
I glanced at the clock. Rose would be waiting for me in less than an hour. I quickly made a decision.
“Stay there,” I said. “I’m coming over.”
“Sweet Alice,” he said. “Of course you are.” Then he hu
ng up.
I sent Rose a text message.
“I have an emergency and can’t meet today. I’ll call you later.”
I hit send, then immediately turned off the phone and stuck it in a bedroom drawer. I wasn’t up for reading her response, not now.
I got down to the street just as the taxi arrived.
“Where to, miss?” the driver asked. I gave him Harvey’s address and got into the car.
I rode in silence toward Harvey’s home. It would be only the second time I’d been there. The last time had been the night I’d met him, when he’d interviewed me for this job, and just like last time, I had no idea what I would find today when I got there.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The taxi dropped me at the gate at the end of Harvey’s driveway. There was a bad moment when I realized that I didn’t know the code to open the gate. Feeling like an idiot, I pressed the “call” button on the keypad. Instead of a person coming on, the gate swung slowly open. Harvey had either assumed it was me or was watching me somehow. I looked around, but didn’t see any obvious surveillance cameras. I hurried up the drive toward the house.