Chapter 3
For a moment I was too busy mentally flogging myself to hear Britney's question.
"Have you been to Vegas yet?"
"No, we just got here last night." And I'd been too busy making doe eyes at gorgeous boys who were completely out of my league to do anything like take a shopping trip.
Britney perked up at my answer. "We so have to go down there soon. It's the only place within an hour and a half where you can do any decent shopping."
Normally the prospect of driving for hours to watch someone else spend money I didn't have, sounded roughly as appealing as laying out naked at the pool until I had second-degree burns on my whole body. Then again, maybe burns wouldn't be so bad if they let me disappear into the anonymity of a large crowd in an actual city rather than dealing with hick hostility.
"That sounds great; I can't wait to get out of this stupid town."
A couple of people started a bit, and I heard a locker slam shut with surprising force. The eavesdroppers were predictably pissed I was dissing their home, but I didn't care. It served them right. Don't listen in if you aren't prepared to hear something you won't like. As long as my comments hadn't offended my new pseudo-friend, I was just fine.
Britney laughed. "You said it. There is so nothing to do here. You can't even go hiking anymore..."
I'd already realized Britney wasn't the type to think twice before words actually left her mouth. Curious.
"What do you mean we can't go hiking?"
She was looking around at the other students. "Nothing, come on. We're going to be late for class."
I followed without a word, even more intrigued now. 'Cool' people don't sweat tardiness and Britney really wanted to be cool.
A slender, frumpy-looking woman looked up from her desk as Britney and I walked in. I held up my form, which she took without reading it. "No doubt something to ensure I know you're my newest student. Sit over there where you won't distract Britney from just how poorly she's doing in my class. There's an extra book on the shelves in the back."
Britney rolled her eyes as she went to her assigned desk, but I suspected she was actually relieved we'd been split up. Mrs. Campbell didn't seem like the kind of teacher you could get away with ignoring, so I retrieved an algebra book from the back of the room and sat at my desk.
Any thoughts about finding out why hiking was off limits quickly melted away once class started. Math had never been my favorite subject. I'd always managed to pull A's or at least A-'s, but hated all of the little nitpicky rules.
Unfortunately, after missing a whole month of classes, I was at least as bad off in Algebra as I was in Biology. Mrs. Campbell was solving problems with so many variables in them it was like watching alphabet soup spontaneously re-arrange itself on her overhead projector. Not only that, things were being squared and cubed, an operation with which I had only passing familiarity.
I struggled valiantly to understand what was going on. I got the sense the operations being applied to the formulas were being explained very well, I just didn't have the vocabulary to follow what she was saying.
By the time class finally ended I was fighting not to become emotional. The fact that Britney looked for a moment like she was debating whether or not to wait for me before finally stopping next to the door with her arms crossed, didn't help.
I threw my book and binder into my backpack and tromped up to the front of the classroom. Mrs. Campbell looked up when I reached her desk. "Here's your form, among other things."
I verified that the top sheet had her signature on it, and then turned to go. She didn't let me get very far.
"From your bewildered expression during class it appears you aren't transferring in from another school. I expect most of your other teachers are just letting you pick up from where they are now. I'm afraid this class builds on itself, so I'll be testing you on everything we've covered in the past month. I'm sure you've got a full class load, but we haven't gotten into anything truly difficult yet. The sooner we get you caught up, the better off you'll be. Shall we say a month from today?"
The prospect of trying to catch up, all the while needing to master new material and deal with a full schedule of other classes, was too much. I felt tears rising to the surface even as my heartbeat sped up to near-panic attack levels. That was the last thing I needed, but I could only fight off so many worries at once, and I was quickly approaching my limits.
"Now don't come unglued on me. The school has set aside some discretionary funds for a math tutoring lab after school every day. We're not fully staffed yet, but if you swing by we should be able to help clear up any questions you might have. You'll have to do the majority of the work. I expect you to actually read your math book, but if you give it an honest effort I'm sure you'll be just fine."
That helped a little. It was still a daunting prospect, but knowing I had somewhere to turn for help comforted me more than I would have expected. I mustered a half-hearted grin and followed Britney out into the hall.
"She's a complete monster. None of the other teachers are nearly as strict as Campbell. Making you catch up on all that homework is ridiculous."
My silence seemed to leave my new friend at a loss for words. I guess she was used to people agreeing with everything she said. I didn't like to lie though, so when I didn't agree with someone I tended not to say anything. I guess I didn't think my new task was as unreasonable as it'd first appeared?
"On the plus side, at least we'll both be at the math lab together. I've had to spend an hour there every evening since Dad found out I had the class low on the first test. Stupid Internet. I can't believe they give our parents an account where they can see how we do on every test."
Britney had my sympathy there. Nobody liked their parents knowing too much about their school life, academic or otherwise. "Wow, they talked about doing that at my last school, but I wouldn't have expected a town this small to have something like that implemented."
We dropped our books off and started towards the cafeteria. Being back at my locker, back where I'd seen Mr. Gorgeous, made me wonder about him. Britney had to ask me a question twice before I realized she'd been talking.
"Sorry, I was thinking about something."
"Hmm, what distracted you?"
I debated dodging the question, but it was normal to talk about boys. "There was a guy and a girl who walked by earlier when we were at your locker."
A knowing look flashed across Britney's face. "Oh, their royal highnesses Alec and Jasmin. They're pretty distracting all right, but don't waste your time. They'll never waste a thought on you or me, or pretty much anyone."
The way she said their names implied they were a couple. Even if they weren't, she was probably right about not getting my hopes up. Especially considering the way Alec had looked at me there at the end. Despite my best efforts the question still slipped out. "They're together then?"
Britney smirked. "You really are masochistic, aren't you? That's the rumor. Nobody really seems to know, at least nobody who's talking, but they're almost always together. You really shouldn't go there; he's brutal when it comes to breaking girls' hearts."
There was a story there, but I wasn't about to ask now and expose myself to further ridicule.
Britney was oddly quiet as we entered the lunch room. I was a little hungry, but the pangs were a distant kind of discomfort. The real suffering for not eating wouldn't come into play until we hit the tutoring lab. Oh well, when I got home ravenous and ate a decent-sized meal Mom would probably be ecstatic. Or too wrapped up in some project to even notice. It was hard enough anticipating what I was going to do from day to day. Trying to figure Mom out was truly futile.
Being held up by Mrs. Campbell at least had one advantage; the line for Britney to get food was nearly non-existent. Britney was talking again, but it was still the kinds of things I could respond to with half my attention. I took the opportunity to get a good look at the cafeteria. It was incredibly small. It was probably on
its second generation of students, but looked pretty good still. The linoleum floor was faded, but still relatively clean, and the white paint on the walls was conspicuously free of tags and gang signs.
The students even seemed to be mingling fairly easily with each other. I actually kind of missed the feel of armed camps. My school hadn't been bad compared to some stories I'd heard from California, but there'd still been some kids beaten pretty severely for crossing the wrong group of wannabe gang members.
Britney had a piece of pizza, and looked like she was eyeing a piece of cake until she noticed I was trailing along behind her without a tray of my own. She actually sighed as she passed the cake. The urge to giggle was so strong I uncapped my water bottle and turned slightly to the side in an attempt to disguise my amusement.
It was one of those moments I'd try to reconstruct in my head again and again. I think I must have heard the cash register till close, or maybe Britney said something. Whatever the reason, I took a step in her direction while still looking away, my bottle half raised, and ran into the biggest junior I'd ever seen.
My clumsiness would've been embarrassing enough all by itself. Unfortunately my mostly-full bottle of water splashed all over both of us.
I felt my cheeks go hot. Britney gasped and giggled. I silently told myself things were as bad as they were going to get. I was wrong. The boy wasn't as cute as Alec, but he was so close I could hear those cosmic scales being melted down into something useless again. Paperweights maybe.
I didn't want to see the mess my water had made of his shirt, so I started at the top and worked my way down. I'd seen better hair in a couple of fashion magazines, but not very many. Casually windswept, straight blond hair had become iconic sometime in the last few years, and this boy either spent an hour on his hair each morning, or the wind in Utah was kinder and gentler than the wind in Minnesota. Kinder, and currently working on its cosmetology license.
His skin was exquisitely tanned, lighter than Jasmin or Alec's, but exactly suited to his lighter hair tone. Friendly gray eyes perfectly spaced above some of the most natural looking white teeth I'd ever seen. My heart would have started slowing down if I'd been sure the display of teeth was a smile, but there was something about the expression that defied classification.
Gritting my teeth slightly I let my gaze continue on down to assess the damage, only I couldn't. I could see the wet spots on the shirt. My mind was classifying it as a dark green polo with some kind of designer insignia but I couldn't see anything other than how huge he was. I'd seen linemen on high-school football teams whose shoulders weren't as broad even with their pads on. The shirt was snug enough to see that the rest of him was built along the same lines. No wonder I'd bounced right off of him, a small car would've probably done about the same thing.
My blush deepened slightly as I realized I was wondering what it would feel like to have those arms wrapped around me. I jerked my gaze back up to the handsome face just in time to see the expression settle into a genuine smile.
"I'm so sorry. I should have been watching..."
He gently cut me off with a gesture. "No, please. It was entirely my fault. I shouldn't have tried to squeeze past you like that."
The smile was still there. That had to be a good sign. Usually when people said something nice and didn't mean it their smiles only lasted as long as they were speaking. I tried a tentative smile in return and his widened slightly.
"I'm Brandon."
Feeling more than a little nervous, I allowed him to capture my right hand in his.
"I'm Adr...Adriana."
Our handshake had ended, but my hand was tingling slightly. It was a pleasant, if illusionary, reminder of the contact, one I was hoping would last for about the next three days.
"You must be the poor soul who's got everyone buzzing with curiosity."
Brandon reached into the tall, glass-fronted fridge next to the cashier while he was talking, and pulled out a bottle of water and one of those aggressively-colored energy drinks. He slipped some money to the cashier while I was still trying to come up with a response that didn't sound stupid.
"Um, yeah. We just got into town last night."
He handed me the bottle of water. "Well I hope you'll like it here."
"Wait, what's this for?"
The grin was back, and his teeth were still perfect. "I just made you spill yours, it's only fair."
Brandon nodded at Britney, who stood there with her mouth slightly open, as he walked away.
After a second or two of both of us staring blankly after Brandon, Britney grabbed me by the hand, the one holding the new, unopened water bottle, and pulled me over to a table in the corner.
"Oh my gosh, you just poured water all over Brandon Worthingfield the Third. And then he talked to you. This is so incredible."
I more or less fell into my seat, staring at my new bottle of water as Britney's chatter poured over me. It was pointless to try and pay attention to anything she was saying. It was all I could do to remember to nod when she paused and looked at me expectantly.
Lunch passed all too quickly. Before I knew it we were back at Britney's locker and she was promising to give me a ride home from school after Spanish.
History was about as dry as I'd expected, which was really too bad. I'd had a good history teacher in junior high, and it was an incredibly interesting subject when taught right. Unfortunately Mr. Simms was possibly the worst teacher I'd ever had. I mentally shrugged when we were told to open our books and read the chapter to ourselves. At least I wouldn't have any worries when it came to catching up in this class.
Thoughts of Brandon made it hard to really get into the chapter. Also, it was hard not to notice the borderline hostile stares from the other kids. I sighed in relief when the bell rang, and pulled out my schedule and map to see where I'd be going next. Physics? I mentally reviewed my conversation with the secretary, but couldn't remember either of us mentioning the class. As if trying to catch up in Algebra wasn't going to be bad enough, I was going to face the same kind of problem in physics.
Grumbling to myself, I promised to try and switch into something better first thing tomorrow morning. The class was in a section of the building I hadn't been to yet, one apparently older than the rest of the building. The lights were spaced further apart and the cinder blocks in the walls were a slightly different size.
Good thing I still had my water. The old part of the school was just as hot as the rest. You'd think functioning air-conditioning would be a necessity for a school so far south. At least it should cool down a little in the coming months. Assuming of course I lasted that long without losing it from dealing with all of the crazy small-town people in this school.
I entered the classroom and was immediately greeted by a portly, white-haired woman. "Hello, hello. My name is Mrs. Alexander, and you must be Adri. Oh, not Adri? Very good then, Adriana it is."
I watched bemusedly as Mrs. Alexander searched through her pockets for something to write with for at least half a minute before realizing she'd placed her pen behind her ear. The form now signed, the pen went back behind her ear for safekeeping, and she motioned me to a seat, predictably at the back of the classroom.
As I negotiated the crooked path between desks, I found myself looking forward to the class. Right up until Alec slipped into the classroom a few seconds before the bell rang.
If there'd been any justice in the universe, he'd have somehow gotten uglier over the last few hours. That or I'd have developed some kind of partial immunity to him. Neither was the case, he was just as unearthly gorgeous as he'd been in the hall. The sight of him was almost overwhelming.
As he slipped into a desk an aisle away from me, I tried to breathe deeply and slowly in a futile effort to calm my racing heart. It helped a little when he slid the desk back a few feet. As long as I watched Mrs. Alexander I couldn't see Alec anymore. It seemed like I could still feel him though. The right side of my body hummed and tingled, almost imperceptibly, t
elling me he was there.
I did my best to ignore the sensation, concentrating on the pictures rapidly forming on the ancient blackboard as Mrs. Alexander diagrammed the conceptual model of a wave, and started dissecting the various parts. Crest, trough, period, amplitude. None of it was hard to understand, not particularly interesting, but still a welcome distraction.
After what seemed like an eternity, Mrs. Alexander placed the piece of chalk she was using behind her other ear and smiled at the class. "Okay, that's your introduction to light. Form up into your usual groups and take a project summary; you'll be working on this for the next few days."
I joined the class in filing past the teacher's desk, and then watched as everyone started moving desks around. Mrs. Alexander saw me walking hesitantly back to my desk, and intercepted me before I could get there.
"Miss Paige, you'll have the good luck of working with Mr. Graves."
It wasn't until Alec looked up, annoyance clearly evident on his handsome face, that I realized I was supposed to work with him. It was yet another sign of rejection in a day that'd been largely filled with everything but acceptance. It shouldn't have bothered me, not considering how poorly I'd always fit in; but whether because of his good looks, or for some other unrelated reason, I found myself wanting Alec's approval. My breathing started coming faster, exceeded only by the pace of my heart.
Apparently I wasn't the only one who could tell that working with me wasn't what the school's resident rock star had in mind. There was a scattered chorus of badly stifled giggles off to the front of the class. Not the normal kind people use when they're amused, but the high-pitched ones girls use to embarrass each other.
Alec's face unexpectedly softened for a moment, his expression still unwelcoming, but now mixed with a trace of something else. While I was busy trying to understand the sudden change, Mrs. Alexander looked at the front of the class with a frown on her face for a moment. I suddenly realized that she knew the difference between the two kinds of giggles. That was unusual in someone so old. The younger teachers usually kept the girls from being too awful to each other, but the old guard didn't really catch the subtle differences high-school girls used to emotionally traumatize each other.
Her kindly face taking on a stern cast, Mrs. Alexander turned back to Alec. "I'm sure you'll enjoy working with Miss Paige, Alec. After all, you can't really expect to do everything by yourself. Occasionally a helping hand is exactly what's called for."
The words reached inside me, pulling on something that was already bleeding, tearing it further. The classroom rocked back and forth at the same time my legs lost the ability to support my weight. Alec lunged toward me, moving incredibly quickly as my mind spun away back to our kitchen table.
I was fourteen and trying to understand geometry proofs. Mom had given up trying to help me with homework about the time I turned twelve, so she kept telling me to just read the book and figure out what they were doing in the examples.
By the time Dad got home from work tears were streaming down my face and I couldn't even see the diagrams anymore. "I can't do it, Dad. Missy Jeffrys already did the entire assignment before we even got out of class, and I can't even figure out one problem. I'm not good enough; I'm never good enough."
Rough fingers had appeared from outside my peripheral vision, gently smoothing away tears. "Come on honey, you really can't expect to do everything by yourself. Let's take a break for dinner, and then I'll help you."
He'd forestalled my next excuse as if reading my mind. "There isn't anything wrong with letting someone help you. Sometimes a helping hand is exactly what's called for."
The memory had a vividness that'd been lacking lately. It was the same aching realism that'd devoured nearly a month of my existence before I finally decided I had to try and go on with my life, for Mom's sake if for no other reason.
I panicked when I realized just how badly I wanted to slip back into that twilight world where nothing hurt, where it didn't matter if people liked me or not. The one where I still had all three of the most important people in my world.
The fear that I'd give in, that I'd end up in a hospital during the day or two it took Mom to realize I hadn't made it home from school, pulled me back sooner than normal. For a second my mind inhabited a body that wouldn't obey any of the normal commands. Fear snaked out from my center when my eyes wouldn't open, but before my heart could really start accelerating, my eyelids started functioning again.
The desks on the route between Alec and I were lying haphazardly on their sides, but there wasn't any sign of Alec. Mrs. Alexander was looking down at me, concern etched into her features, and the beginnings of a crowd was starting to form as the rest of the students came over to look at the freak. Only something wasn't right. They weren't towering enough. When you pass out on a regular basis, you get used to finding yourself on the floor surrounded by concerned-looking people, but none of these people were looming properly.
Everyone else having somehow gotten too short suddenly wasn't as important. The room was still swinging around, only now it wasn't moving, I was. A pair of muscular arms encircled my tingling waist and legs, holding me tightly to a near rock-hard chest as Alec deftly weaved through the approaching crowd of students.
I closed my eyes as a wave of heat started at my collarbones and rushed up to the tips of my ears. I wanted to throw up, except that would be even more embarrassing than being carried out of class by the most popular boy in school.
I opened my eyes and found we were already out in the hall. Alec's stride was so smooth it was hard to believe we weren't still back in the classroom.
"Put me down, I mean please put me down."
Those clear, deep eyes met mine for a second, seeming to look past the surface and all the way down to the bleeding mental gash that'd just triggered my most recent collapse. I was trying to marshal my arguments, but his eyes wiped my mind clean. I couldn't form another coherent thought until he shook his head and looked away.
"You need to see the nurse."
My mind hiccupped for a second. There should be some kind of law requiring him to hide those things. Sunglasses, or maybe a blindfold.
"I'm fine. That wasn't anything; it didn't mean anything. Please put me down."
I tried to put the right amounts of sincerity and confidence in my words, but I wasn't a very good liar. Something changed though because Alec slowed his ground-eating stride.
"What do you mean you're fine? People don't just collapse with no warning. You seemed fine and then you were falling. You s...you seemed hurt."
I shook my head gingerly, surprised when I didn't feel the twinge I knew was coming. The attack had been more sudden than usual and nobody had been close enough to catch me. In those circumstances experience had shown that I led with my head.
"It was just the heat here. I'm not used to it. Now please put me down."
Alec looked at me doubtfully, then took a deep, no doubt calming breath, and shrugged. The movement seemed too casual, almost as if he was angry, but trying to hide it. I wanted to try and make eye contact to test my hypothesis, but was afraid of what I'd see. The tingling was spreading, no doubt a bad sign. Maybe I'd hit my head even harder than I thought.
"It was all just a game for you, wasn't it?"
There was anger behind the voice now, subtle, like the scent of rain the night before a storm, but definitely there. I started to bristle; I even took a breath to explain what'd really happened. Only the truth wasn't any better than the story he'd fabricated. It was worse even. I'd much rather this cocky, spoiled, rich boy be mad at me than feel pity. I'd had enough pity from my mom to last years.
"You bet. Think they bought it?"
I tried to inject the proper amount of blonde stupidity into my words, but wasn't sure it worked until I felt Alec's arms tighten almost painfully around me. I gasped, and he set me down so quickly I almost fell over.
Before I'd even regained my balance, he was walking away, moving so quickly I would
've needed to run to keep up. Even so, he hadn't turned away quick enough to hide the complete disdain in his expression.
I suddenly found myself wishing I'd told him the truth rather than making him think I was stupid and manipulative.
It was too late. He was already out of sight, and by now his opinion of me was fixed.