Chapter 5
It was a good thing I'd started school in the middle of the week. If I'd gone to school the next day after all the drama of learning about our mortgage problems I probably would have had a nervous breakdown. As it was, I was essentially worthless all weekend.
I tried to warn Mom about the animals that'd mauled the kids from school, but she told me she was already aware of the incident and left before I could draw her into a discussion of what we should do about the bank.
I saw her for maybe a total of three hours during the entire two days. Even I knew it was wasted effort. If Mom somehow beat the odds, it still wasn't going to result in the kind of money we'd need to save our house. Not in the next two or three weeks at least.
It felt like my whole world had just disappeared down a drain. I didn't suffer any real panic attacks, but more or less spent both days in a kind of despondency that wasn't much better than a full-blown attack.
By the time Monday morning arrived I had vague memories of doing homework and not much else. The only positive from the whole weekend was the way my dream from Friday stayed with me. As I got ready for school I idly wondered if it would be possible to recreate the grotto in real life. Obviously not with the impossible, glowing water, but with the incredible, lush vegetation and the secluded pool. Then again, I'd seen Mom pull off some pretty crazy tricks with her camera, maybe there would be some way to simulate glowing water, some kind of photography trick I'd never heard of.
I walked downstairs as the eastern sky was just starting to change colors.
Mom was already gone. The message board was conspicuously empty, so she was either still frustrated with me, angry at our hopeless situation, or wrapped back up in her quest to become a renowned photographer.
Britney picked me up on schedule and I somehow made it through my first two classes. Mrs. Sorenson was still out to prove to everyone I was an idiot, and Heathcliff was still a psychopath despite Mr. Whethers' best efforts to explain the character's motivation.
Math was actually the high point of the morning. Mrs. Campbell was smart enough to put Britney off in a corner surrounded by the kind of kids she'd never even consider talking to under normal circumstances.
Not having Britney distract me all hour would have been a blessing by itself, but things got even better when Mrs. Campbell complimented me on the homework I handed in.
"Most excellently done, Miss Paige. Albert said you seemed to pick up the concepts quite quickly. I've noticed you've been working on the older material during class, which I very much approve of, but you may want to listen today. We're starting a new section, and it should be fairly straightforward for you to pick up."
I shouldn't have been surprised when she turned out to be right. The new chapter was on probability, which had absolutely nothing to do with the stuff they'd been working on the week before. I quickly decided I didn't like the new stuff as much as what I'd been studying on my own, but it was relatively easy, and almost before I knew it class had ended and it was time to go to lunch.
My doubts about whether or not everyone would be back in school today after three nights of partying were quickly resolved as Britney and I tried to fight through the ridiculous foot traffic on our way to our lockers.
By the time we made it to the lunch room, I was heartily sick of dodging jocks with shoulders the size of an ox. Why on earth did every single one of them think it was necessary to mock fight, throw balls back and forth to each other, or otherwise make a spectacle of themselves?
My mood was further soured as we arrived to find an unmistakable circle of bystanders signaling an impending fight. My first instinct was to go find a teacher before the two idiots hurt each other, but while I was still looking around to see if there was an adult in the room, Britney grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the circle.
It wasn't until we got closer that I realized there was something wrong with the circle of kids surrounding the combatants. Normally everyone pressed in tight for the best possible view.
The spectators in this fight were divided into two groups, with a fairly significant space between them. The rest of the students seemed to be reluctant to fill that gap in. It wasn't until Britney pulled me closer that I understood why.
Brandon stood surrounded by his friends on one side of the circle, with Alec and a smaller group standing opposite them. The tension in the room was like the air before a lightning strike, charged and unpredictable, a living organism on the point of materializing out of thin air and attacking anything surrounding it.
Taking in the two groups, I was amazed at the disparity before my eyes. The kids behind Brandon were half again as many as the gathering behind Alec, and they were eager for the confrontation, watching with excited eyes, and large smiles.
Alec's company on the other hand awaited the coming fight with calm exteriors and a sense they were bowing before the inevitable conflict without conceding anything to their opponents. They were fewer in number, but the men were larger than anyone other than Alec or Brandon, and I somehow knew even the girls were dangerous.
With a sudden start I realized the confrontation wasn't between Brandon and Alec as I'd originally thought. Instead the stuck-up blonde I'd first met in the office, was squared off against a brunette less than three-quarters her size. As Britney pulled us even closer, almost into the dead zone between the two factions, I finally realized the smaller girl was Rachel.
"You're going to get what's coming to you, you little slut."
The blonde's voice sounded exactly like I'd imagined, arrogant, vindictive and only barely controlled. Rachel on the other hand sounded calm, speaking in tones I shouldn't have been able to hear, except the spectators were unnaturally quiet.
"I haven't done anything to you, Cassie, and you know it. This is all just an excuse."
I looked around for teachers, but they were still conspicuously absent. There wasn't time. Even if they arrived right now, someone was probably going to get hurt.
Cassie tossed her hair and smiled, a plastic expression that bordered on a smirk. "Shut your lying mouth. I'm really going to enjoy this."
Britney had positioned herself so she could see Brandon. As a consequence, I could see Alec's entire group, and I was amazed by their reaction to Cassie's belligerence. Jasmin's pretty lips drew back in something that looked almost like a snarl, and she'd tensed up so tightly she was almost shaking.
For a heartbeat I thought Jasmin would launch herself at the other girl, but Alec reached over without looking, and grabbed her arm. A stocky, Middle Eastern-looking boy to Alec's right looked like he wanted to act as well, but he was looking at Alec, and an almost imperceptible headshake stopped him.
I'd been so busy watching the byplay behind Rachel that I'd missed the last two exchanges between her and Cassie. Whatever had been said must have been bad though. Rachel was shaking, and the blonde looked like someone about to pull the wings off a butterfly.
I could feel my heartbeat climbing, slamming away at my ribs with all the energy of a full-blown panic attack, but I wasn't dizzy, just scared.
The cafeteria workers had all turned around so their backs were facing us, a sight which kindled the first spark of anger, an emotion that burned brighter because of the fear still coursing through me.
There was a gasp as Cassie shoved Rachel, a misleadingly casual motion that sent the smaller girl stumbling back into Alec's chest hard enough to leave bruises.
The typical catcalls were still absent, it was as if nobody viewed this as a normal fight, like there was somehow more at stake.
I'd been waiting for someone to intervene on Rachel's behalf. It was obvious she knew nothing about fighting. Cassie wasn't the kind of girl to fight just to prove a point and then forget about the incident afterwards. Just looking at her, I knew she'd remember any slight for as long as she lived, and she had enough influence in the school to make just about anyone's life miserable. She probably got away with things just because nobody was willing to cros
s her. Rachel was going to get hurt.
I was still thinking about all the ways I could get hurt when I stepped through the no-man's-land and into the circle. The parts of me that weren't emotionally dead, that were still behaving rationally despite the accident, were screaming in terror. There probably wasn't anyone in the school who knew less about fighting than me. I knew I should turn around and run away before Cassie realized I was serious, but somehow I didn't care.
Cassie's arsenal of nasty tricks wouldn't be so effective against someone who'd already been kicked out of their house and moved to another state. All I really needed to do was survive the next few minutes. I'd be out of the state before she really got busy making my life miserable.
A dozen different things I could say blew through my mind, but they were all competing, and none of them fit the situation. In typical fashion, I found myself without anything clever to say. Instead I just stood there and stared at Cassie.
I'd thought things were tense already, but where everyone had been quiet before, now they were motionless too.
Cassie spun around and glared at me. "Take off."
I shook my head and clenched my fists a little tighter. "Leave her alone."
For a second I thought Cassie would go through with it. Her knuckles went white, and her breathing sped up. I knew if she sprang at me, I was going to get really hurt.
When Brandon's hand appeared on Cassie's shoulder to restrain her, I thought for a second my knees would buckle. A few seconds later, it was as if nothing had ever happened. The ring of spectators dissolved as kids quickly returned to their tables. Brandon and his friends left through one set of cafeteria doors, while Alec and his friends departed through the other.
Britney looked like she was trying to decide whether to be mad or impressed, but I felt too sick to stick around and try to nudge her in either direction. I mumbled something I hoped sounded intelligible and headed towards the bathroom. I passed Mr. Simms and another teacher on my way out, but apparently I looked as awful as I felt. They just shot me stern looks rather than stopping me to ask what had happened.
It wasn't until I'd finished dry-heaving and was trying to clean myself back up, that I wondered where they'd been. The school building wasn't that big. If they'd really been trying to break up the fight, they should have arrived minutes earlier.
I thought about hiding in the bathroom for a while, but that was exactly the kind of place a girl like Cassie would want to catch me. Instead I took a deep breath and walked outside.
Britney was waiting for me. By her expression she'd decided on being mad. "Do you realize what you just did?"
I was still fresh out of witty comments. I just shrugged instead.
Britney had been mad before, now she looked furious. "You just picked sides, and you picked the wrong one."
Maybe I still wasn't recovered from my ordeal on Friday; I felt like I was missing something obvious. Britney apparently agreed, and she wasted no time in letting me know what it was.
"There are two in-crowds here; Brandon's group, which consists of all of the athletes and cheerleaders, and Alec's group, which is about half the size, and outside of his immediate friends is made up of a few geeks and misfits. You were on the border of getting in with Brandon, but just threw all of that away to save Alec's little sister when he's too much of a coward to do it himself."
I wanted to protest, to explain why everyone should be able to get along, or point out that despite Brandon's obvious appeal, it was his friend who was wrong, but Britney had already turned and stalked off. I probably would've spent the next few minutes refining my arguments for the next time we talked, but the last thing Britney had said finally sank in.
His sister. Rachel was Alec's sister, and he hadn't made a move to save her. He hadn't even been willing to let his friends step in and stop the fight.
I drifted off to History thinking that I would've done almost anything to save my sister. It would take a real heartless individual to abandon their own family. My anger buffered me just enough to think about Cindi without the usual consequences, but I still wasn't really in top form. I was halfway through my class before I realized Mr. Simms had been shooting me dark looks for the last twenty minutes. They weren't the obvious nasty looks that kids shoot each other of course. They were subtle and infrequent but there was something about the set of his mouth that made it clear he wasn't pleased I was in his class.
I shrugged it all off and gutted my way through class, eagerly planning what I'd say to Alec when I saw him in physics, only when I finally stalked into Mrs. Alexander's class Alec wasn't sitting in his corner desk.
I pulled out my notes and started reviewing what I'd managed to learn about our project, stalling until he arrived so I could give him a piece of my mind. Only he never walked through the door.
I still had my anger, but it wasn't cushioning me as well for some reason. It felt like another attack was on the way. My pulse was skyrocketing and the room wavered as my vision dimmed. It didn't make sense to be having a panic attack right now, but images of Cindi swam into view, alternating with pictures of Alec and Rachel.
It was like Alec's cruelty to his sister somehow meant I was failing Cindi. I concentrated all of my energy on thinking about Alec, about how much I hated him, about what I was going to say to him next time I saw him.
Beyond all expectations, it worked. My heart rate slowed down to something approaching normal, and the room stopped moving around. By the time Mrs. Alexander finished taking the roll, and returned her pencil to its customary place behind her ear, I'd stabilized enough that I could read my notes again.
The group project was due tomorrow, and since Alec hadn't bothered to make an appearance in class since my first day in Sanctuary, it was looking like I'd have to do the whole thing by myself if I wanted to pass. Yet another reason to hate him.
So far I'd had zero luck figuring out why rain puddles in the parking lot sometimes had colors on them, sort of like little earthbound rainbows. I turned around and picked a reference book at random. It was a weighty thing that might or might not have the answer, but at the very least promised to keep me occupied for the duration of the class.
I finally found something promising about fifteen seconds before the bell rang. I probably would've stayed there trying to cram information into my head, but Mrs. Alexander walked by with a smile on her face as the last of the other students filed out of the room.
"If you're really that enthralled by a college physics book, you're more than welcome to take it home with you tonight. Just promise to bring it back in the same condition. Remember, I'm less concerned with your answer, and more interested in the process you take to try and solve the problem. Of course the right answer never hurts."
I smiled and hurried out of class with a 'thank you'.
I shouldn't have bothered rushing. I slipped into Spanish exactly three seconds before the late bell sounded, but Mrs. Tiggs wasn't even there. When she finally did show up, we had a surprise quiz on our vocabulary. Once we finished she turned on the television and told us to listen for conjugation.
I almost wished I shared the class with Britney, her dad seemed like the type to get six kinds of riled up over something like that. He'd probably go straight to the school board and demand a new Spanish teacher altogether.
It was a real relief when I was finally able to leave the drab little classroom. I stopped off at my locker before heading to the tutor room, but Britney was nowhere to be seen. Probably still mad. I mentally shrugged as I swapped out books, and set off.
Rachel was already seated in her usual spot in no-man's-land. I debated where to sit for a second. I'd done the right thing in standing up to Cassie, but I didn't want to further alienate Brandon, or put myself anymore firmly in the group of idiots who looked to Alec as their master and liege. Before I could finish weighing the pros and cons, Rachel looked up and caught my eye.
The smile that appeared on her face was tentative but genuine, and completely reso
lved my doubts. I returned her shy greeting with a smile of my own, and sat down at the table closest to her.
Britney entered the tutor lab a few minutes later, and frowned at me before going over and sitting at the end of the room containing the jocks and cheerleaders. Apparently I was supposed to have waited?
I sighed and flipped open my book. As I finished up my second assignment for the day, I realized I was parched. My trusty water bottle was empty when I reached for it, so I quietly stood and left the room. I thought I remembered where the closest drinking fountain was. Even so, I planned on getting a little lost before I found it. I didn't, however, plan on nearly colliding with Alec as he slowly rounded the corner in front of me.
The tension of the near-fight earlier had distracted me from just how incredible-looking he was. There was no such refuge now. For a moment I couldn't think of anything other than how the dark blue of his shirt brought out his tan complexion.
If his gorgeousness had stopped there, I probably would've been okay, but the little spirits in charge of keeping the universe in equilibrium must've been momentarily busy with something more important.
The blue buttons that kept his shirt snuggly wrapped around his impressive torso were almost the exact shade of his eyes, which happened to be staring at me with a trace of something different than his normal self-assurance. In someone else I would've almost said gratitude, but his manner was too arrogant for that.
More than anything else, that was what finally shook me from my reverie. He was already talking.
"...wanted to talk to you about what happened today."