"You're so beautiful, Emma. And I don't mean physically, although you're that too. I don't know where you came from, but it wasn't anywhere here on this earth."
She laid her head on his chest, listening to his heart. "I've got leopard blood running in my veins, Jake. Believe me, I have the same bad temper and jealous streak that you do."
"I feel lost tonight," he whispered, holding her to him there in the dark.
"It's all right," she said softly. "I'm here and I won't let anything happen to you." She closed her eyes and let herself relax against his body.
"Mommy?" Both turned their heads toward the door, where Kyle stood uncertainly. "I'm afraid."
They both held out a hand simultaneously. "Come here, son," Jake encouraged. Kyle climbed onto the bed and Jake tucked him between them. "There's nothing to be afraid of. You're safe."
"Daddy?" Andraya took her brother's place in the doorway. She'd either seen Kyle coming out of his room, or he'd awakened her to accompany him, which was more likely.
Jake uttered a soft groan and beckoned her, his smile widening when he looked at Emma. Andraya crawled over her father and, ignoring Kyle, wedged herself in the middle, wiggling until she found a comfortable position. Jake put his arm around all of them--his family--and lay back, his fingers tangling with Emma's, remembering that it wasn't that long ago that he was completely alone in his house. Now, they could barely fit in the bed.
"We'll have to have another one to fill this space over here on my side," Jake said, patting the only bare spot he could find.
Emma's fingers tightened around his. "We'll have to get a bigger bed."
Jake fell asleep first and Emma watched him, sleeping like their children. He didn't look younger, only more relaxed. Her heart ached for him. He was struggling to become the man she knew he wanted to be, but he fought it every step of the way, terrified of being vulnerable. She could have told him it was already too late, that he was already there, but she knew he had to come to that realization on his own--not just in a moment in the middle of the night when it was dark and he didn't have to look her in the eye. He had to accept that he knew how to love all of them. Her. The children. Their life together.
She drifted off, dreaming of her mother and the way Emma had always wanted to run with her. She loved it when her mother would assume her animal form and she could lie next to her, fingers tangled in her fur, feeling the extraordinary pleasure of being so close to something wild and powerful. Her father wasn't a shifter, and the odds were against her ever being like her mother. At least she had Jake and she could rub her face in his fur and get her fix that way.
Emma woke to the sound of laughter and several whispering voices. Conspiracy hung heavy in the air. She turned her head and saw them all lined up. The ones she loved. Jake, between Kyle and Andraya. He held a tray and they each carried a flower. She sat up. Jake grinned at her as the sheet slipped, revealing the curve of her breast, and she was forced to yank it up quickly. He set the tray down and handed her a shirt from her closet. It was a button-down, and she hastily put it on, doing up the buttons under his amused gaze.
"We made breakfast, Mommy," Kyle announced.
Andraya nodded. "Breakfast," she echoed.
"It looks great," Emma said. "Thank you so much." Jake set the tray on her lap and she tried not to look dismayed at the strange mixture that looked like it might have eggs in it. "Did you two cook?"
Kyle nodded solemnly. "Daddy helped."
"And he let you choose what you wanted to put in Mommy's eggs?" Emma watched Jake's face. He'd had fun. He'd learned to have fun, spending the morning with his children, letting them mix the ingredients into her eggs. She could see the lines of strain had eased and imagined him with the children on chairs, hunched over a mixing bowl, and Jake laughing to himself.
"They were very certain of what goes into a breakfast scramble," Jake said, trying to look innocent. He failed miserably.
Emma's heart melted at the mischievous joy in his eyes. He had never learned the art of teasing, yet here he was, two little chubby hands clutching his, all three faces beaming at her.
"Aren't you hungry?" Kyle asked anxiously.
"I was just thinking Daddy should share this with Mommy," Emma said, holding out a spoonful of the egg mixture.
Both children looked at Jake expectantly. He stared at the gooey mess like it might bite him. "Daddy ate, remember?"
"You're always hungry and the children did such a good job," Emma countered.
"You have a mean streak in you," Jake observed, perching on the edge of the bed. "I'm going to retaliate, you know." Reluctantly he took the spoon from her.
"I think I'm pretty safe," Emma said, knowing his retaliations tended to be sexual. She smirked at him as the children watched him reluctantly put the spoon into his mouth.
She held out the glass of orange juice as he swallowed so he could wash it down. Jake choked a little, smiled at the children and raised his voice. "Susan. Could you see if the nurse is here to watch the children while Emma showers?"
He had that black velvet voice that insinuated all sorts of erotic things. Susan came running and caught each child by a hand. "I'll take them downstairs." She blushed to the roots of her hair, obviously thinking Jake wanted to be alone with Emma.
"You can't eat this stuff," Jake said as soon as Andraya and Kyle were gone. "You'll be sick for a week." He took the tray from Emma and set it aside.
She started to get out of bed but he stopped her, taking her hand. "I want to get married."
Emma looked up at him startled. "We just got engaged."
"I'm aware of that, Emma, but we have two children. Let's just get it done. I can get us a license immediately and we can get a judge here and just do it. By the way, I have the papers for you to sign for the adoption."
Emma pulled her hand away and shoved the covers back, rolling away from him to the other side of the bed where she had a robe. She couldn't think straight being nearly naked with him fully dressed. There was something too erotic about the way his eyes brushed over her skin and heated her body. Her brain just refused to function. She wasn't going to say yes just because she wanted sex--and she did want sex. Just looking at him filled her with love.
He was so lost. He'd admitted it to her. He fought himself over the growing feelings he had for her. She knew he wanted to keep his emotions in check and regard her and the children the way he did his possessions. His. He cared for them, protected them, provided the best for them, but he didn't invest his heart. The problem was, Jake didn't know himself very well. He cared for the people working for him. He cared for Drake and Joshua and every other lame duck he'd brought home. And he loved Andraya and Kyle. In his eyes, when he held her, in his voice when he talked to her in the middle of the night, Emma saw and heard that he loved her. He might not recognize it, but she did.
"Emma, stop stalling. How hard can it be just to say yes? Why wouldn't we?"
"You're like a gazillionaire, Jake. You need a prenuptial to protect you. That takes time to put in place, especially when you have the money and property and companies you have."
His eyebrow shot up. "Did Stillman contact you?" he asked suspiciously.
Emma shrugged, trying to look casual. "I contacted him."
He stood up, towering over her, looking incredibly intimidating. Emma refused to step back, looking up at him, refusing to be sorry for doing what she felt was right.
"You did what?"
"It was important to me to protect you," Emma said quietly.
"No."
Emma swept past him, heading for the bathroom, her nerve breaking at the muscle ticking in his jaw. Jake caught her arm, abruptly halting her.
"I'm not discussing this with you, Jake," she said, pressing her lips tightly together.
"No, I'll be discussing this with Stillman. I don't want a prenuptial. It's going to be difficult enough without you thinking we're not on equal footing. Whatever I have is yours. I meant what I said when we fi
rst talked marriage. I don't believe in divorce. This is it for us. We do it, and we find a way to live with it."
Her heart jumped. "Jake, try being just a little romantic about marriage instead of being ruthless. You sound like you're threatening me instead of proposing."
He caught her chin and tipped up her face. "I've tried never to lie to you, about what I am inside or how difficult I can be. I have every confidence that I'll do my best for you, but I'm also very aware I'll want everything my way.
You're sweet and kind, Emma, and I'm likely to take advantage of that and walk all over you if you let me. I want the playing field leveled so you never feel as if I have the advantages all on my side."
She shook her head. "Your logic is so elusive, Jake."
"I plan on having a half dozen more kids with you. Why? To keep you right here, on this ranch, so there's no place you can run to. That's my kind of logic, Emma."
"You're supposed to have children because you want them, Jake," she pointed out, exasperated. "Not to keep me occupied so I won't run away."
"I want them because you're going to love them. I want to watch you love them. I want to watch that look come over your face whenever you look at them. I want to hear the sound of your voice, that special note you have reserved just for them. I could live forever listening to you talk to the children." He couldn't tell her what it did to him inside. Made him soft. Happy. Stupidly happy. She scared the hell out of him the way she made him happy.
"Jake, someday you have to realize I'm staying with you because I want to stay with you. You only think you manipulated me. I knew what you were doing all along. I stay because I love you . . ."
"If there's such a thing as love, Emma, and I'm not saying there is, I trapped you into loving me."
She burst out laughing, threw her arms around him and hugged him tight, lifting her mouth to his and kissing him in a long, leisurely kiss.
As he held her to him, his heart did that curious melting thing that always alarmed him. He couldn't have this. He couldn't be like this with her. She was taking him over and making him so vulnerable he could barely breathe with the way he felt about her. He had to find a way to establish his dominance and take the control back.
He set her firmly aside, trying not to show his breathing was ragged and forced. "No prenuptial, Emma. Let's just get the thing done."
"The thing? Meaning our wedding? You're such a romantic, Jake. Go away. You're annoying me again and I was just feeling all loving toward you."
It was obvious to her that Jake, along with having the doctor check her, had scrubbed her skin in an effort to remove the scent of the other man. She couldn't blame him; as a leopard he was highly sensitive to what he would regard as the stench of another male. But now her skin felt raw in a few places.
Of course he didn't leave because she'd told him to do so. He watched her dress, heaving a sigh when she put on a bra.
"Why do you have to wear that?"
"Because I don't want my body to break down as I get older. And I'm not a sex object for you to drool over all day. I've got work to do."
"What's wrong with being both? I like the idea of you being a sex object while you work." His voice held sensual speculation and a little too much interest.
Emma frowned at him and hastily finished, clipping her hair up out of the way.
"You know I like your hair down."
"Which is why I don't cut it. Be happy with that. You try having hair down to your butt, getting in your way while you're taking care of children." She scooted past him. "I'm giving you an assignment today, Jake. Look up the meaning of the word romance."
"I'm romantic." He followed her down the stairs. "Ask Susan. She'll tell you."
Emma paused by the window in the small breakfast nook where she'd left her day watch. She'd taken it off when she was dressing for the party the night before. "Susan is sixteen and her hormones are running amok. She thinks you're hot."
"I am hot. You should listen to her more."
The window was open and the faint smell of skunk made her wrinkle her nose. "Isn't this the wrong time of year for skunks to be hanging around under the house? It smells like one sprayed outside." She closed the window to shut out the odor. "I think I'll put some potpourri in here."
"Too much information for me," Jake said with a small laugh. "It's your house, honey. Do whatever you want to do with it. I'm going to be working all day in my office, hopefully without the smell of skunk or potpourri, but I might need you later." Jake gave her a wicked smile, his golden eyes sensual as he patted her on the butt.
"Anytime," Emma agreed, her body growing hot at the thought as she slapped at his hand. There was something about him that could turn up her temperature in a matter of minutes.
"Susan." Jake beckoned the teen to follow him as the girl came around the corner. "I wanted to show you the library."
"I didn't know you had a library," Susan said, fascinated. She followed him down the long hall, past the closed doors that led to the wing of his private offices. "I've never even come into this part of the house. I stay upstairs or in the rooms with Emma."
Jake opened the double doors to the huge room. Behind him, Susan gasped as she took in the floor-to-ceiling book-cases, and the ladder on rollers that ran along all four walls on a track. "You're welcome to use this anytime. You're extremely intelligent and you can be anything you choose to be. It doesn't matter if your father is home a lot or not. You're welcome here. I've got a tutor coming for you and a self-defense instructor. If you need anything else, let me know. But this . . ." His hand swept around in a semicircle to encompass the entire room. "This is my sanctuary. This is where I learned to survive."
"I love books," Susan said.
"I keep the library up-to-date. If you need anything on any subject and you can't find it in here, don't hesitate to ask me. Everything is cataloged. And there are computers for you to use as well. I have a library of videos as well."
"Jake. I can't believe this. Thank you." Susan stepped inside and did a little hop and skip, rushing to one side of the room to examine the book titles in the history section.
"Don't neglect any subject. It's amazing what knowledge can do for you."
She pulled out a large book and opened it, her gaze scanning the pages. "I love books," she repeated. "I had no idea you had this library."
"Susan." Jake went back to the door and paused until she looked up at him. "Never let anyone make you think you're less than you are. Very few people have your gift for languages. You have a quick mind and a sweet nature. People may want to make you feel small or put you down to build themselves up. That's their problem, not yours."
Susan nodded her head, clasping the book to her chest.
"And I want you to learn self-defense. Emma can join you for the lessons. You may need them someday."
Susan nodded again, her eyes sparkling. "Thanks, Jake."
"I'm heading for my office. If you need anything, use the intercom."
Susan waited until he had disappeared before running down the hall to find Emma to tell her everything.
"Self-defense lessons? A tutor? Does he think he gets to keep you?"
Susan hugged herself. "He made me feel like part of the family." She blinked rapidly to keep back tears. "I haven't felt like that since my mother died. Dad is always gone and I am so lonely. I don't go to a regular school and I don't really have anyone at home. Dad hires different people, but it isn't the same."
Emma hugged her. "Well, you know Jake. If he claims you, he watches over you. You won't be so grateful when you want to start dating."
"Maybe I could date some of your bodyguards. I really like them."
"Maybe you could just forget about that," Emma said. "I promised the kids they could play on the swings. You want to go with us?" She activated the small radio transmitter she had set into her watch so that she could alert Drake that she was leaving the house with the children.
"If you really don't mind, I want to look ar
ound the library. It's enormous," Susan said.
Emma didn't blame her. Pushing two demanding children on the swings wasn't a teenager's idea of a dream afternoon. She called Kyle and Andraya to her and they hurried out to follow the path to the side of the house where the elaborate play yard Jake had built for them was located.
The air was cool, the wind blowing, but the play yard was protected and Emma had them bundled in their sweaters. Kyle ran to the slide and Andraya reached up her arms to be put into the baby swing. Emma carefully snapped the safety belt around her and pushed her while she squealed with delight. Kyle called out to her over and over, making certain he was getting his share of attention.
Emma was surprised their constant bodyguard didn't show up immediately. They were usually very prompt, but both children were being good so she didn't radio a second time, not wanting anyone to get into trouble for not moving fast enough.
"Mommy, look!" Kyle pointed to the corner of the house where the gardener had planted tall, grassy plants. She especially liked the varieties there and Kyle and Andraya loved to play in the mini-jungle.
"What, baby?" she asked, not seeing anything but the waves of grass as the wind played through the plants.
Kyle gave her a stern look. "I not a baby. I'm Kyle," he announced firmly.
Emma looked contrite. "Yes, of course you're Kyle." His identity meant a lot to him.
He went down the slide again, watching the grass intently. Emma did her best to see what interested him, but it was impossible to tell whether it was the play of the wind, the tall variegated grasses of various colors or some shiny rock on the ground.
Andraya kicked her feet and yelled again. "More. More."
Emma pushed her higher. Andraya wiggled around in her seat, laughing out loud. Emma looked back over at Kyle to find he had slipped off the slide and was just entering the tall field of grasses.
"Wait, Kyle," she called and pushed the radio button again. She hurried after him.
Of course he didn't wait, disappearing into the thick, tall plants. Emma glanced back at Andraya and ran after Kyle, calling his name as she hurried after him. She caught a glimpse of his shirt as he wove his way through the grass. Kyle crouched low, following something.