Read C4 Issue 1: Winter 2011 Page 12

your expression fixed and seamless.

  The hills look so graceful in snow

  it’s easy to compare them

  to folds and naps of the flesh,

  easy to apply those contours

  to your infinite mental landscape

  as well as your slinky posture;

  but I can’t use them to construe

  the figure of you I envision,

  a mathematical rather

  than emotional state of grace.

  Maybe that portrait by Sargent

  contains in two dimensions

  everything I know about you

  except that right now you’re sitting

  over War and Peace and almost

  aware of me being aware

  of you; and down the valley

  a freight train’s hooting along like

  someone unzipping a zipper

  to reveal that other dimension

  in which I’m sure you exist.

  The Transamerica Pyramid

  by Yaul Perez-Stable Husni

  The Transamerica Pyramid is an old Gypsy

  who reaches up to rob the sky of its planets.

  The Transamerica Pyramid is an old Gypsy—

  I want to hear him sing

  the wandering tune

  of his footsteps.

  I want to swim

  in his eyes of distilled sunflower.

  The Transamerica Pyramid is an old Gypsy

  veiled in quartz.

  I want to see his picture in the newspaper

  His big lips enter

  my blue consciousness.

  I want to spear the old Gypsy through the liver

  with a wooden knife,

  watch him bleed,

  so that we know he is alive

  and a Gypsy woman birthed his great body.

  How to See Yourself

  by Shannon C. Walsh

  I.

  At the full-length, suck in then push out

  your stomach. Gingerly stroke your lower

  belly as if to pet the fetus.

  Imagine the phone call, “Honey, my mom

  was right, two people in love can make a baby—

  it's a miracle!” Tell her that it’s only right

  to marry the mother of your impossible

  child. Jerk your abs to pretend the baby’s

  kicking. Remember your pregnant friend’s

  uterus climbing up to her sternum,

  her stretched skin, a figure moving beneath

  that taut sheath. You wanted to vomit,

  thought something would pop through her stomach—

  an alien. Then the screaming for food,

  a change, a toy, a nappy, bobby, passy,

  blankie, potty—years of sticky screeches.

  Decide you’d rather be single.

  II.

  Study your lips, eyes, nose—nothing special.

  When you flutter your lashes you look

  epileptic. Your breasts list toward your hips

  and your thighs look like garbage bags

  of tapioca pudding. But your ass

  is thick and round like a Thanksgiving

  turkey. Shake it, side to side, slowly,

  like Jessica Rabbit. Pretend you’re in

  a sparkling blue dress, tight in the right spots,

  atop a piano crooning Fever.

  She’s in the front row, in a zoot suit.

  When you leave the stage to work the crowd, sing

  on her lap, bottom barely touching

  her knees. She wants you, but can’t have you.

  At the end of the show, she’ll buy you a scotch,

  rocks on the side. And you’ll saunter over,

  sip the drink push it back to the barkeep,

  “Jimmy, make it a Manhattan.” And you’ll treat

  her so badly, she’ll just want you more.

  III.

  Catch the reflection of the fat cat

  lying on your bed and think she too looks

  like oversized poultry, and she couldn’t

  make her stay. Realize mirrors don't show truths.

  In a business suit, the mirror makes you

  a mogul. In an orange vest, a hunter.

  You've never held a gun, but the glass

  doesn't discern between shown and real.

  When in pants, it appears a tree branch

  never blazed a scar across your shin,

  but you can remember the whizzing pain

  of falling from your perch. Even naked,

  the mirror doesn't show the marks She left:

  useless, ugly, unworthy. You should

  shave your head and tattoo a trashcan across

  your skull so a glance shows what you really are.

  Town and Country

  by Luca Penne

  A famous Thanksgiving dinner at my stucco urban palace. The tables arrange themselves variously: two very long ones, four shorter ones, two middling short, one slightly long. I realize the scene is unreal, my guests imaginary, conjured largely from the dead. My father, my Uncle Aloysius, Jack Bate and Herman Melville, Lord Byron and Teddy Roosevelt, Aunt Esther and Henry Adams, Charlotte Bronte and One-Arm Connolly, who killed himself at forty. The rattle of glassware makes a ghastly but cheerful music.

  Unable to correlate my guest list, I step outside the urban dream and enter the rural one. A huge maple has broken and half-fallen, angled over the eggshell of my country house. Let it topple and smash the antique slate roof if it wishes. Meanwhile on a nearby ridge of naked basalt a gaggle of teenagers silly with beer is climbing a sullen mossy cliff. I shout at them to halt and descend, but they ignore me. When one falls and breaks her bones with a snap audible for a mile I laugh the meanest laugh.

  Nothing will induce me to return to the Thanksgiving dinner I dreamed in a sorry moment. My country house, a sprawl of twenty rooms, is also a ghost of the mind, but it doesn’t repulse me the way the imaginary dead, eating real food in my townhouse, do. I lack a motive for either dream; but watching the huge broken maple sway like the Sword I suppose revenge against myself will do—the brief November day going sulfur-yellow at sundown and the lawn torn by frost-heaves exposing the bedrock.

  A Frog Pond

  by Luca Penne

  Off Dusthouse Road a frog pond stews in mingled purples and browns. The jitter of crickets and keening of cicadas fill the gaps between senses, alerting me to the continued expansion of the universe, critiquing various dimensions. The modest industrial buildings scattered along the edge of the woods—old brick, modern metal sheathing, fire-prone wood-frame—regard me without curiosity, though only the brick predates me, the rest erected in honor of the passing of my childhood. That is, the narrative includes both the raising of small buildings and the rearing of my person, parallel structures responding mainly in terms of strategy rather than mutual perception. The frog pond, however, remains murky, grape-fringed, difficult of access, private as the mind. The occasional croak of a frog expresses continuities I can’t claim even with myself. To be a frog is to be all frogs, I guess. The industrial buildings don’t even pretend to any permanence, and neither do I. Not that frogs don’t suffer and die, but the pond, only twenty feet wide, resists the encroachment of worlds less complex and fully realized, and the fringe of grape and ivy upholsters this small fragility against clumsy people like me.

  An Outdated Globe

  by Luca Penne

  Russia remains the Soviet Union, Sri Lanka still Ceylon. Amusing myself with a razor knife, I cut out and peel away nations until the planet’s piebald in my hands. Now in mockery of cosmology or divine rage, I drop the metal ball on the floor and stomp it flat. This feels good and I wish I could do it again, like any authentic creator disappointed by creation.

  So much for a sublunary world susceptible to artificial frontiers, stamping of passports, military coups, and famines. So much for the United Nations and global capitalism. I pity those
abstractions children study in grammar school, where no one learns grammar anymore.

  Later, on the way to the landfill with a mess of trash including that crushed, humiliated globe, I wonder how many worlds lie beyond the measurable universe, whether the human ego counts as a world, whether the basic globe-shape adequately represents everything from atom through ego to macro-universe.

  At the landfill the solid thump of trash bag tossed in the hopper satisfies so completely I wish I could discard my body that casually and violate the law of form and walk away into worlds unknowable as globes, atoms, egos. I stroke my razor knife and wish I had the nerve to slice my arteries and learn if the blood flow is as cosmic as they say.

  Dementia (I)

  by Julian Smith-Newman

  At the appointed hour repetition

  Conducts us to the table once again,

  And we, abandoning what vague volition

  We retained, yield gratefully the reins.

  A radiant evening, flaxen tablecloth

  As usual laid with china and oblique

  Streaks of the setting sun. I first, then both

  My father and my father’s father seek

  Our customary chairs and start to eat.

  The food is good; and the familiar scrape

  Of silverware on teeth, chewing of meat,

  Deliberate swallows, fills somewhat the deep

  Inevitable silences: but for this

  We’d all go mad. As it is, we grow versed

  In ceding to a rhythmic peristalsis

  We invent, teaching ourselves the first

  And only art dementia can perfect,

  This art of repetition. Evening sun

  Splinters across the dinner table, flecked

  With silver, glass. We eat until we’re done.

  A state of mind, like most things—

  by Katelyn Kiley

  i.

  Yesterday, I climbed through

  a fresh snowfall, to your house

  where whiskey awaited me, and a fire

  that started and died within an hour.

  The embers went cold and still

  we can’t hold hands in front of anyone.

  If you try to hold a poem

  too tightly, it squeezes, suffocates

  and flattens out in front of you.

  It would be too heavy-handed to say

  that is our relationship, and yet—

  Here I am, not saying that, but saying

  stop it with the goddamn video games already

  and, sadly, what I mean is

  aren’t my hands more beautiful

  than anyone’s? My words?

  ii.

  It’s like trying to sew hair into scalp,

  the kind of connection only God

  can make, miraculous

  growth. What we need is

  some stem cells, to have a fair shot—

  a bit of my heart transplanted

  as a supplement to yours.

  We are trying to fall because maybe

  we could save one another, then.

  iii.

  Lets move to a rainforest, live by

  only our wits, under tents permeated

  by heat and humidity, using our hands to make

  fire and dinner and everything—I’d smash

  this glass of wine and cross

  your forehead with what has spilled,

  lovebaptism by chardonnay—

  the whiskey was too much for me

  and it’s not in a glass tumbler

  with three cubes of ice, instead,

  it’s in a yellow mug, and you’ve used

  snow to make it a slushie, there is

  some black dot floating

  in the bottom but you drink

  anyway, I want to shake you.

  The cold is everywhere.

  iv.

  I find a half-eaten segment of

  clementine still stuck to its rind

  in the toe of my shoe the next morning.

  No one knows how it got there.

  You walk me home through the snow and I make

  us breakfast. We are a week away from Valentine’s Day.

  I keep trying to pull myself out

  of my body. Ecstasy, it is called—not

  the same as love, or even

  sex. Sometimes eros is what we wish

  to escape from. You’re wearing sunglasses,

  the day is white, this snow—light

  infinitely brighter, slushed out roads,

  inconsistent ground—slipping home.

  Falling Asleep in the Afternoon

  by Daniel Lawless

  Not navies harbor-bound in the veins

  Or the pen’s gentle drift off the page

  But a thundering horde on the steppe

  And you little peasant all alone in a black field

  Outside your frozen village motionless mouth agape

  In wonder and gratitude at its huge approach

  That spells the end of everything

  Unknown Destination

  by Daniel Lawless

  Like one of the dead in Hans Memling’s fifteenth century vision

  Of the Last Judgment, stepping from their graves

  As if on risers onto a crowded stage,

  Trailing their winding sheets like matted boas—

  So you came to me in memory

  As I leaned against a pole at the Bruges station,

  Done in by the day’s chilly museum crawl:

  A farm boy Caesar out for a piss

  At a long ago fraternity party,

  Missing your step and tumbling into the pit

  Your brothers had dug for the next day’s pig roast,

  Cracking your skull on a knob of Kentucky limestone;

  How you slumbered there and finally rose

  Shakily among us in an unraveling toga,

  Head cocked as if to the unheard summons of a cloud

  Of shivering trumpet vines,

  Saint and devil by turns

  Of the late-arriving old-fashioned ambulance’s revolving eye.

  Picture This

  by Jenn Monroe

  I hear them, my neighbors, through the bathroom wall, as horsehair plaster

  won’t keep secrets. He says I love you, and I wonder, does he want her because

  he loves her, or does he love her because she lets him enter through her side

  door. She will give just that much of herself, to stretch her pale body across

  the dark bright space between them. He asks for a picture, to prove this is

  happening, but only memory can capture warm water glowing bioluminescent

  on a clear new moon night, giddy echoes in two languages, single cells

  that shimmer at the ends of dark hair, brighten across chests with each breath,

  and, along up-stretched arms, form constellations from sea to sky and back.

  Illumination

  by Greg Hewett

  An ancient desire to be led by thread or breadcrumbs or stars takes me link by glowing link through something like darkness to one person

  who may be bullheaded, a witch, a disaster, or unaccountable, but neither random nor determined, and in reality

  of course just traces of someone, an image emerging from ether, from four billion virtual hues, each with its own precise charge.

  Such precision. The image illuminated like every other—a profile spun out with filaments of words—becoming a second person.

  I picture you crouched over star-glow of telephone as you offer your location up. Me, in the same position, back at you.

  I can account for all illumination leading from my door to yours—car-light, streetlight, moonlight, steeple sheathed in incandescence,

  glitter of stained-glass saints backlit, CCTV screens in your lobby, caged light bulbs in the hallways,

  elevator light droning like a trapped fly, the peephole glinting, offering
<
br />   a hint of labyrinth's end, your interior.  Nothing will appear beyond the angstrom range of the human eye.

  Not in a world where the galaxies of deep space are just motifs for screen-savers.

  About the authors

  Gale Acuff has had poetry published in many literary magazines and has authored three books of poetry, available from Brick House Press. He has taught university English in the US, China, and the Palestinian West Bank.

  Terra Brigando is currently studying for her MFA in fiction at Mills College and lives in San Francisco. Her previous work has appeared in Arizona State University's Superstition Review, Redlands Review, DecomP, apt: an online literary magazine, and Fogged Clarity. She loves the color yellow, the sound of words, and grinding her own coffee.

  William Doreski lives in Peterborough, New Hampshire. His latest collection of poetry is Waiting for the Angel (2009). He has published three critical studies, including Robert Lowell’s Shifting Colors. His fiction, essays, poetry, and reviews have appeared in many journals, including Massachusetts Review, Notre Dame Review, The Alembic, New England Quarterly, Harvard Review, Modern Philology, Antioch Review, Natural Bridge. He won the 2010 Aesthetica Creative Works competition in poetry.

  Born in Port-au-Prince, M.J. Fievre is an expat whose short stories and poems have appeared in numerous publications, including Haiti Noir (Akashic Books), The Southeast Review, The Caribbean Writer and The Mom Egg. She is the Secretary of Women Writers of Haitian Descent and a regular contributor to the online publication, The Nervous Breakdown. She is a graduate student in the Creative Writing program at Florida International University. She loves coconut shrimp, piña coladas, her dog Wiskee, and a good story. Anton Chekhov is one of her favorite writers. Her author website is located at www.lominy.com.

  Margaret Finnegan teaches writing at California State University, Los Angeles.  Her work has appeared in Salon, LA Times, FamilyFun and other publications.  She blogs at https://margaretfinnegan.blogspot.net and is very grateful that she has never had to participate in a science fair, although she has been forced to endure them.