Read Career in C Major: And Other Fiction Page 7


  It is the plea of the defendant Summers that he shot in self-defense and that his act was accordingly justifiable. Such a plea is permissible under the law, and if supported by the evidence is ground for acquittal. In view of this plea, then, you must consider whether the life of the defendant Summers was actually threatened. To determine this, you must consider the actions of the deceased Brody and his companions antecedent to the acts described in the indictment. It is in evidence that the only act which they committed of which the defendant Summers became aware was their forgathering on his front stoop and singing a hymn known as “Nearer, My God, to Thee,” a point on which he satisfied himself by peeping through the curtains before reaching for his gun. Before his plea can be allowed, then, you must consider whether the singing of the hymn “Nearer, My God, to Thee” by Brody and his companions constituted a threatening act. If you find that it was a threatening act, then you should acquit him. If you find that it was not a threatening act, and if you find that his shooting of the deceased Brody was in no other way justifiable, then you should find him guilty of whichever of the three crimes are open to you under the law. Are there any questions, gentlemen?

  You may retire and consider your verdict.

  3. The Jury

  The jury room, a few moments later. The jurors, who are MR. GAIL foreman, and MESSRS. HAGAR, BASSETT, ZIEGLER, FUNK, REDDICK, PETRY, LEE, DYER, PENNELL, MOON, and WEMPLE, file in and take to the chairs with which the place is provided, some sitting solemnly apart, some hooking their heels on the edge of the table which stands in the middle of the room, and still others camping within range of the cuspidor.

  MR. GAIL

  Well, men, le’s git at it. What I mean, le’s git a verdick quick, so’s we can git out in time for supper.

  MR. DYER

  You said it!

  MR. LEE

  That suits me!

  MR. REDDICK

  You’re dam tooting!

  MR. BASSETT

  ’Cepting only that State’s attorney tooken away all my appetite for supper.

  MR. REDDICK

  Me too. I never seen such a looking sight in my life.

  MR. BASSETT

  “For the honor of our fair State, gentlemen, for the honor of your State and my State, I ask to return a verdict of murder in the first degre-e-e-e-e!” And then all that whooping and hollering wasn’t enough for him. Oh, no! He had to spit all over you.

  MR. GAIL

  The spit, it wasn’t so good, but what we got to talk about now is the verdict.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Yeah, the verdict.

  MR. GAIL

  What we going to do?

  MR. PENNELL

  I kind of feel like we ought to hear what Mr. Petry thinks about it.

  MR. PETRY

  This is a hard case. This is an exceptional hard case.

  MR. WEMPLE

  This is the balled uppest case I ever heard tell of in my life.

  MR. MOON

  How come that fellow to git killed?

  MR. WEMPLE

  What’s the matter? Was you deef you couldn’t hear what them people was saying out there?

  MR. MOON

  I heard what they said, but seems like I can’t quite git the hang of it.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Hunh!

  MR. MOON

  Yes, sir. Scuse me, sir.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Scuse you? Say, fellow, what ails you, anyhow?

  MR. MOON

  Yes, sir. I ain’t quite got it straight yet, like of that.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well, for the love of Mike, quit looking like the police was after you every time I look at you….Which is the part you don’t understand?

  MR. MOON

  About the singing.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Why, there wasn’t nothing to that. That there was to fill him with the holy fire.

  MR. MOON

  Oh yeah. Thank you, sir, Mr. Wemple. Oh yeah. The holy fire.

  MR. PETRY

  I expect you better explain how it was, Mr. Wemple. Anyway, as good as you can. ’Cause this man don’t act like he was so bright nohow, and maybe it wouldn’t hurt the rest of us none if we was to kind of go over it once more, just to git it all straight.

  MR. PENNELL

  If Mr. Petry, he feels like he’s got to hear it oncet more, then I reckon we all better hear it.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well, the way I git it, this here Summers, what they got on trial, he wouldn’t never go to church.

  MR. FUNK

  ’Cepting only he’s a Disciples of Christ and there ain’t no Disciples church nowhere around here.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well, one thing at a time. Whatever the hell he’s a disciples of, he wouldn’t never go to church. So the Ku Klux got it in their head to go out to his place and try to bring him around.

  MR. FUNK

  It wasn’t no such thing. They was sore at him ’cause he went to work and boughten hisself a disk harrow offen the mail-order house ’stead of down at the store.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well then, dam it to hell, you know so much about it, suppose you tell it!

  MR. REDDICK, MR. BASSETT, MR. ZIEGLER

  Let the man talk!

  MR. FUNK

  All right. But why don’t he tell it right?

  MR. WEMPLE

  I’m trying to tell what them witnesses said. After we git that all straight, why then maybe we can figure the fine points on how much they was lying.

  MR. PETRY

  I think Mr. Wemple’s telling it the way most of us heard it.

  MR. WEMPLE

  So they went out to his place, this here Brody what got killt and five other of them, all dressed up in them nightgowns.

  MR. ZIEGLER

  And got it in the neck.

  MR. WEMPLE

  In the neck and the funny-bone and the seat of the pants and a couple of other places where maybe they’re picking the shot out yet. ’Cause this here Summers, he ain’t only boughten hisself a disk harrow offen the mail-order house, but a twelve-gauge, single-barrel, six-shot pump-gun too. And when they commence bearing down on the close harmony, what he done to them was a plenty.

  MR. LEE

  I swear I never heared the beat of that in all my life. Idea of going to a man’s house three o’clock in the morning and commence singing right on his front stoop!

  MR. DYER

  And “Nearer, My God, to Thee”!

  MR. REDDICK

  They was a hell of a sight nearer than they figured on.

  MR. WEMPLE

  And Brody, he got it in about all the places there was, and in the middle of the stummick too, and he bled to death. So he come about as near as he’s going to git. So that’s how come he got killt.

  MR. PETRY (to MR. MOON)

  Do you understand now?

  MR. MOON

  Oh yeah, oh yeah. Anyways, a whole lot better. Thank you, sir. Thank you, Mr. Wemple.

  MR. GAIL

  Well, men, what are we going to do?

  MR. WEMPLE

  That there is a question…. Mind, I ain’t afraid of the Ku Klux. If this here Brody was in it, and this here Summers what killed him had the right on his side, I’d turn Summers loose just as quick as I would anybody.

  MR. GAIL, MR. HAGAR, MR. LEE, MR. DYER, MR. ZIEGLER, MR. REDDICK, MR. FUNK, MR. PENNELL

  Me too! I ain’t afraid of no Ku Klux!

  MR. PETRY

  Mr. Wemple, I don’t believe there’s a man in this room that’s afraid to do his duty on account of the Ku Klux. Unless—

  MR. MOON

  I ain’t afraid of the Ku Klux. Not me.

  MR. PETRY

  Then I think that’s one thing we don’t have to worry about. All the same, I think it wouldn’t hurt none if all of us was to remember that what goes on in this room ain’t to be told outside.

  MR. WEMPLE

  That’s understood. Or dam sight better ha
d be. But what I started to say, we got to be sure this here Summers had the right on his side.

  MR. HAGAR

  Look to me like he did all right.

  MR. FUNK

  What I say, when them Ku Klux goes to take a fellow out, why don’t they take him out or else stay home?

  MR. BASSETT

  That’s me. I never seen such a mess-around-all-the-time-and-then-never-do-nothing bunch in all my life.

  MR. ZIEGLER

  And all this “Come to Jesus.”

  MR. HAGAR

  And “Sweet Adeline.”

  MR. REDDICK

  What’s the good of that? Everybody knows what they was there for. Then why the hell don’t they up and do it thouten all this fooling around?

  MR. FUNK

  All the time making out they don’t never do nothing ’cepting the preacher told them to do it.

  MR. DYER

  And then, come to find out, when they pick up Brody he had a strap on him looked like a trace off a six-horse harness.

  MR. ZIEGLER

  I reckon the preacher give them that for to beat time to the singing.

  MR. MOON

  That was to scare him.

  MR. HAGAR

  Yeah?

  MR. MOON

  Anyway, so I hear tell. That’s what them Ku Klux said.

  MR. HAGAR

  Them Ku Klux sure can tell it their own way.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Wait a minute, wait a minute…. Moon, how come you heared all this what the Ku Klux said?

  MR. MOON

  They was just talking around.

  MR. WEMPLE

  I ain’t asking you was they talking around. I ask you what the hell you was doing around them?

  [MR. MOON makes no reply. There is a general stir.]

  MR. FUNK

  What the hell? …

  MR. WEMPLE

  Come on, Moon. Why don’t you say something?

  MR. PETRY

  Why, what’s the matter, Mr. Wemple?

  MR. WEMPLE

  Why, that simple-looking nut, he’s in the Ku Klux!

  SEVERAL

  What!

  MR. WEMPLE

  Look at him, the lying look he’s got on his face! Hell, no wonder he acted like the police was after him! No, he couldn’t git it straight about the singing, ’cause they done filled him up with so much talk, he don’t know is he going or coming! No, he ain’t afraid of no Ku Klux, ’cause he’s got a nightgown hisself already.

  MR. ZIEGLER

  But how about them questions?

  MR. WEMPLE

  I’m coming to that. Hey, you, why ain’t you said something about this when they ask you them questions? When they ask you was you in the Ku Klux, how come you said you wasn’t?

  MR. MOON

  Lemme alone! Lemme alone!

  MR. WEMPLE

  Quit that crying or I’ll bust you one in the jaw. Now answer me what I just now ask you.

  MR. PETRY

  Let me talk to him, Mr. Wemple. Now, Mr. Moon, when them lawyers ask you was you in the Ku Klux, what made you answer no?

  MR. MOON

  I tried to tell them how it was, but they wouldn’t let me say nothing…. That there man, he kept a-saying. “Answer yes or no.” … I tried to explain it to them, but they wouldn’t never give me no chance.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Chance? What the hell! Couldn’t you say yes?

  MR. MOON

  They ain’t tooken me in yet. I ain’t never had the money. They won’t take me in lessen I give them the ten dollars.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well, I’ll be damned!

  MR. PETRY

  I never hear tell of nothing like this in all my life. Why, Mr. Moon, don’t you know that was perjury?

  MR. MOON

  I tried to tell them, but they wouldn’t lemme say nothing.

  MR. PETRY

  Don’t you know that when you take oath before the judge to tell the truth, you got to tell the truth else it’s against the law? Ain’t nobody ever told you that before?

  MR. MOON

  Lemme alone! Lemme alone!

  [There ensues an ominous silence, punctuated occasionally by MR. MOON’S sobbing.]

  MR. BASSETT

  So now every word what’s been said in here, the Ku Klux knows it five minutes after we got it.

  MR. ZIEGLER

  This sure is bad.

  MR. HAGAR

  Moon, effen a juryman tells what he heared in the jury room, they put him in jail for five year.

  MR. LEE

  Ten year.

  MR. DYER

  And the penitentiary, not the jail.

  MR. HAGAR

  In the penitentiary for ten year. And he don’t hardly ever come out. ’Cause before the time comes for him to git out, something generally always happens to him.

  MR. MOON

  Lemme alone! Lemme alone!

  MR. FUNK

  Aw hell, what’s the use of talking to him? ’Cause that dumb coot, even if you could scare him deef, dumb, and blind, why he’d blab it all around anyhow and never know he done it.

  MR. BASSETT

  That’s the hell of it. And never know he done it.

  MR. WEMPLE

  What do you think about this, Mr. Petry? Do you think we better report this fellow to the judge?

  MR. PETRY

  I’m just a-thinking. I’m just a-thinking.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well, while we’re figuring on that, I reckon we better git up a verdict. This here look like second degree to me.

  MR. FUNK

  First degree, I say.

  MR. REDDICK, MR. DYER, MR. ZIEGLER, MR. GAIL, MR. HAGAR, MR. BASSETT

  First degree, I say. Me too. This here is murder.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well, I was thinking about first degree myself. ’Cause a Klansman, it stands to reason, he’s as good as anybody else.

  MR. LEE

  He is that. When a man gits killt, something had ought to be done about it and that goes for a Klansman same as anybody else.

  MR. HAGAR

  Everybody alike, I say.

  MR. BASSETT

  And another thing, men, what we hadn’t ought to forget. Ku Klux is a fine order, when you come right down to it.

  MR. FUNK

  I know a fellow what he’s a kind of a travelling agent for the Red Men. He got something to do with the insurance, I think it is, and believe me he’s got it down pat about every kind of a order they is going. And he says to me one time, he says: “Funk,” he says, “you can put it right down, if they’d run it right, the Ku Klux is the best order what they is going. They ain’t none of them,” he says, “what’s got the charter and the constitution and all like of that what the Ku Klux has. Now you’ll hear a lot of talk,” he says to me, “and I ain’t saying the Ku Klux ain’t made mistakes and is going to make a whole hell of a lot more of them. But when you come right down to what you call citizenship and all like of that, don’t let nobody tell you the Ku Klux ain’t there.”

  MR. DYER

  Why, ain’t no better order in the world than the Ku Klux—if they run it right.

  MR. REDDICK

  That’s it. If they run it right.

  MR. LEE

  I swear, it makes me sick to see how they run a fine order in the ground the way they do around here.

  MR. PENNELL

  Well, men, I tell you. It’s easy enough for us to set here and belly-ache like we’re doing about how they run it. But just jump in and try to run it oncet. Just try to run it oncet.

  MR. FUNK

  And specially a order what’s trying to pull off something big, like the Ku Klux is. It’s just like this fellow says to me, the one I was just now telling you about. “Funk,” he says to me, “there’s one thing they can’t take away from the Ku Klux. It ain’t no steamboat-picnic order. No, sir. When the Ku Klux holds a picnic, they don’t sell no round-trip excursion tickets. That they
don’t.”

  MR. BASSETT

  And another thing: that there singing. You ask me, I say that was a pretty doggone nice way to invite a fellow to church. I hope to git invited that way oncet. I’m here to say I do.

  MR. LEE

  And this here dirty whelp ain’t got no more appreciation than to sock it to them with a pump-gun. Six shots, men. Think of that. Them poor guys didn’t have no more chance than a snowball in hell.

  MR. HAGAR

  Yep. Ku Klux is all right. It sure is.

  MR. WEMPLE

  You hear that, don’t you, Moon?

  MR. MOON

  Lemme alone. I ain’t heared nothing.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Listen at that! Listen at that! I swear, people that dumb, I don’t see how they git put on a jury.

  MR. LEE

  Why hell, Wemple, that’s why they git put on a jury. Them lawyers figures the less sense they got, the more lies they believe.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Now listen at me, Moon. ’Cause if you don’t git this straight, you’re libel to git Ku Kluxed before you ever git outen this room. Now first off, effen you git it straight, we ain’t going to tell the judge what you done. Then maybe you won’t have to go to jail.

  MR. MOON

  Oh thank you. Thank you, Mr. Wemple.

  MR. WEMPLE

  But that ain’t all of it. When you go out of here, if you got to do any talking about what you heared in here, we want you to tell what you heared and not no dam lies like some of them does.

  MR. MOON

  I won’t say ary word, Mr. Wemple. I hope my die I won’t.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Well, you might. Now you heared these gentlemen say, didn’t you, that the Ku Klux is a fine order, one of the finest orders in the United States?

  MR. MOON

  I sure did, Mr. Wemple. Ku Klux is a fine order. Yes, Mr. Wemple, I heared them say that. All of them.

  MR. WEMPLE

  Now—

  MR. HAGAR

  Wait a minute, Wemple…. You got that all straight, Moon?

  MR. MOON

  Yep. Ku Klux is a fine order.

  MR. HAGAR

  Then, Wemple, if he done learned that, why look like to me like he ain’t going to learn no more. Not today. Just better let him hang on to that and call it a day.