I turned toward Mindy, hoping Adelle would take the hint and not press the issue.
“There's a guy from my building who would be absolutely perfect for you,” Mindy said. “He's cute. White blond hair, sea-green eyes.” She fanned herself to try to break the tension with a laugh. “Over six feet and muscles... oh my.”
I chuckled and she looked relieved.
“Seriously, Bree,” she said. “He's a great guy. When I met him, my first thought was that if you hadn't been with that creep, Ronald, I would've introduced the two of you. He's so your type.”
It was funny she said that since I didn't even know what my type was. I didn't ask though. I didn't want to give Adelle another reason to suggest I try new things.
“I'm not sure,” I said. I didn't want to hurt Mindy's feelings, especially since she'd saved me from having to tell Adelle no, but I didn't think this was a good idea. “It's only been two weeks.”
“Drinks,” Mindy said. She glanced at Adelle. “I'm not saying sleep with him. Just meet him for drinks tomorrow night.”
My eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Why's he free on a Saturday night at short notice, if he's so great?”
Mindy flushed. “I may have told him that I had someone I wanted him to meet.”
“Mindy!”
“I didn't make any promises,” she quickly said. “I didn't tell him anything for sure, but I wanted to make sure he was available if the opportunity came up.”
I scowled at her but she just looked at me, hope filling her eyes. I sighed, one drink couldn’t hurt. Plus, it appeared I didn't really have much of a choice, not unless I wanted to make Mindy look bad to this guy. I closed my eyes for a moment. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, I told myself. It might be nice to have a civilized conversation over drinks. Get to know someone. Laugh, flirt a little. I opened my eyes and saw Mindy watching me anxiously.
I nodded. “All right,” I said. “Drinks tomorrow night at O'Mallys. I'm taking a cab so I can get plastered if this guy's a ‘just my type’ prick.”
“Deal,” she said, beaming. “I'll go call him right now and tell him the good news.”
I glanced at Adelle as Mindy pulled out her phone.
“I still think you need a good lay more than a date,” Adelle said.
I shook my head. Casual sex just wasn't my thing. I'd never tried, but I didn't think I could do 'no strings.' Even with a fling, there'd have to be some sort of connection. I was just wired that way.
Chapter 3
What had I been thinking? Agreeing to go on a blind date with this guy from Mindy's apartment building had to be one of the dumbest things I'd ever done. It was impulsive, rash and completely out of character. Then again, I reasoned, considering the way my life had gone this past month, maybe doing something against my natural instincts was exactly what I needed right now. If taking my time, thinking things through nice and slow when it came to my relationship with Ronald had led me to this point, maybe it was time to reconsider the way I looked at things.
Not that I was desperate or crazy enough to go with Adelle's suggestion of hiring a hooker. No, a blind date was as adventurous as I was going to get.
If I could figure out what to wear.
How pathetic was that? I’m twenty-five years-old and had no idea what I should wear on a first date. It wasn't surprising, really. After all, it had been seven years since I'd last had one.
Damn it, why did everything remind me of Ronald!
I'd been a college freshman at the University of Illinois when I'd met him, a teacher's assistant for my general psychology course. He'd asked me out after just a couple weeks and that had been that. We'd kept it quiet until the end of the semester, but we'd been a couple from that point until the day he'd walked out before our wedding. And it hadn't been like our first date had been anything I'd really needed to dress up for. We'd had a picnic on the quad with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, a thermos of Ramon noodles, some Saltines and two slightly warm beers we’d had to sneak and pour into red plastic cups. I'd found out later that Ronald had cleaned out his cupboards and fridge for the meal. His roommate had been pissed. At the time, it had seemed romantic.
I shook my head, trying to banish the memories. I didn't want to think about Ronald or anything we'd done together. The problem with that line of thinking was that if I disregarded that part of my life, there wasn't much in the past seven years I could think about then. He was there through all of it, intricately woven into almost every memory.
A knock at my door startled me.
“Cavalry's here!”
I sighed in relief as I heard Mindy's muffled voice. I hurried down the hall and through my tiny living room. When I threw open the door, she grinned at me, most likely because I was still wearing my ratty cotton robe with dancing bananas. She and Adelle had constantly told me to get rid of it and buy something sleek and sexy. I refused. My banana robe was comforting, and during times like this, I needed as much comfort as I could get.
“Oh, sweetie, I knew you'd need some help, but I had no idea it'd be this bad.” She gestured at my robe, rolled her eyes and then headed straight for my bedroom.
I was so glad to see her that I couldn't even pretend to be annoyed. I just followed her into the bedroom, ready for whatever advice she could give me.
“Did you realize it's been almost a decade since you've gone on a date with someone? Like a real getting-to-know-you date?” She put her hands on her hips as she looked at the clothes strewn across my bed. “Things have changed.”
“No, Mindy,” I said sarcastically. “I thought it was still the custom to bring a chaperone to make sure that we kept a respectable distance for each other as we took an evening stroll home from the barn-raising.”
She rolled her eyes again. “Always with the sarcasm, Bree.” She gave me a sideways look. “You know, it's a good thing your students can't hear how you talk outside the classroom.”
I picked up a pillow, threw it at her and whined, “Just help me figure out what to wear.”
She laughed as she caught the pillow and then tossed it back onto the bed. I was glad it was her and not Adelle who'd come over. I loved my best friend to death and we'd both grown up in working class families, but she sometimes forgot that I wasn't in the same financial situation as she was now that we were grown.
Case in point, my entire apartment was smaller than the first floor of her townhouse. And my clothing selection was much more limited, even though it usually filled my tiny closet to overflowing. Most of my clothes were for work, new ones bought over the last year with the belief that finances would soon be a little less restrictive. Ronald and I had worked hard on our budget so that we could afford a place in a nicer neighborhood, but I'd managed to figure out how I'd have enough for a couple new outfits for school, ones that made me look more like a teacher and less like a student. Now, I had clothes I probably could've done without and the same crappy apartment I'd had for the past year instead of the cute little place Ronald and his new girlfriend, Sami, were renting in Lincoln Park.
“Bree?” Mindy nudged my arm. “Where'd you go?”
I blinked and gave her a tight smile. “Nowhere good.” I gestured toward the bed. “Let's find me something to wear and you can tell me all about how dating's changed since the Dark Ages.”
I didn't think relaxation was going to be an option, but I at least calmed down a bit as Mindy started going through my entire wardrobe. I could almost pretend she was helping me get dressed for a girls' night out. She wore the same weary expression now that she did then, clearly telling me without saying a word that my fashion sense was horribly lacking. Not that I dressed like a bag lady or anything like that. No, her problem with my clothes was that I tended to dress simply, nothing bold or outrageous. I was the kind of person who could wear pretty much anything in my closet to work while Mindy had to choose carefully so she didn't end up in an outfit that showed far too much cleavage for a high school math teacher.
“When we get ou
r Christmas bonus this year, you and I are going shopping,” she said as she reached the halfway point. “If you're getting back into the game, you have to dress the part.”
I didn't tell her that I didn't want to get back in the game. I didn't want games at all. In his apology text, Ronald had said that he never meant to hurt me, that it wasn't something he planned... blah, blah, blah. It was all the same shit that I'd heard a million times in movies, and I'd always wondered who those assholes thought they were fooling saying it. Ronald and Sami might not have been having some year-long affair – hell, they might not have even been looking at each other for more than a month – but it had been a game nonetheless. A short one, but one I had lost.
“No,” Mindy said firmly. “None of that.”
“None of what?” I asked.
“No thinking about your asshole ex tonight. No comparing my guy to him.” Mindy put her hands on her hips. For someone so tiny, she could be kind of scary. It was probably what made her a good teacher. “Tonight's about moving past Ronald and getting the attention you deserve.” She picked up a top and a skirt. “Put these on.”
I stared at her; she had to be kidding.
“These were a Halloween costume from college,” I protested. I'd been a sophomore and Adelle had helped me pick out the clothes. I'd lost my virginity that night, and I'd never worn the outfit again. I wasn't even entirely sure why I'd kept it, then almost laughed at myself with that thought. I knew exactly why I kept it, sentimental fool that I was.
“And they're the only thing in your closet that doesn't make you look like a schoolteacher.” She folded her arms and gave me her best 'don't argue with me' look.
“But I am a schoolteacher,” I retorted, earning another eye roll from my friend. Despite my comment, however, I slipped off my robe and started to dress. I'd already chosen a pair of white lace panties and bra, but that was because I didn't really have much of an option. The only lingerie I had that was truly fancy was what I'd bought for my honeymoon, and that wasn't something I was prepared to wear just yet, especially not on a first date with a stranger.
“That's better,” Mindy said as she looked me over with a critical eye.
I looked at myself in the mirror. I was still the same size I had been when I was nineteen and that was a good thing. I didn't think I'd have been able to fit in this outfit if I'd put on any weight. The skirt was tight black leather that hit me mid-thigh, just barely long enough that I didn't look trampy. The shirt looked more like a camisole than something I should wear in public. Thin straps, clinging material and short enough that if I raise my arms too high, I'll be showing off a strip of golden flesh. The skirt was black, the shirt a deep, rich purple that made my eyes look darker than usual. In a detached sort of way, I knew I looked good, but there was a difference between knowing it and knowing it.
Mindy reached up and teased my curls back into place. “I still can't believe you cut off your hair.”
I frowned. “I needed a change.”
She wrapped her arms around me and put her cheek on my shoulder. “I know you did, and that's why it's so important you do this. You deserve to have it all, Bree.”
I didn't say anything, but I let her hug me. I knew she meant well, but moving on wasn't going to be as easy as my friends seemed to think it should be. It wasn't like some casual encounter was going to mend my broken heart. I wasn't going to find a Prince Charming to erase seven years with love at first sight. I believed in real love, but I just wasn't sure it applied to me anymore.
Chapter 4
I stood in the doorway and scanned the crowd at O'Mallys, searching for my date. Mindy had given me a basic physical description, but I didn't have a picture or anything like that.
“Bree?”
I turned my head toward a man sitting at the bar, waving at me. I made my way through the crowd to the empty seat next to the man I assumed was Steven.
“Steven Danforth.” He held out a hand and I shook it. “You look even more beautiful in person.” He grinned, a dimple creasing one tanned cheek. “Mindy showed me a picture of you so I'd know what you looked like.”
As I took a seat next to him, I wondered what picture she'd used.
“So you and Mindy went to Myrtle Beach for spring break last year?”
I groaned. I knew what picture she'd used and I was going to kill her. Adelle had paid for the three of us to spend a week at a beach house last year. The three of us had been on a private beach half the time, which meant I was fine wearing the skimpy bikini Adelle had bought, insisting I start on my wedding tan. I generally avoided having my picture taken, but it had been vacation, so I'd given in and taken a few. All three of us had framed pictures from that week and Mindy's were of the two of us in our bikinis.
I nodded. “A friend of ours rented a beach house.” A wave of relief washed over me as the bartender approached. I really needed something to take the edge off. I ordered a Sea Breeze. I was a bit of a lightweight when it came to drinks, so I wanted something I could sip on all night rather than down in one gulp.
“I'll take another Irish Car Bomb,” Steven said with another easy smile. As the bartender left to get our drinks, Steven angled himself toward me so it was obvious the two of us were here together. “You and Mindy work together?”
“I teach English.” I tried to cross my legs and discovered that my skirt was too tight to do that. I had to settle for crossing just my ankles.
“If you'd been my English teacher, I might've actually done my own homework.” His eyes sparkled, telling me he was joking. He leaned forward slightly so that our knees were touching. “Seriously though, how in the world do your students concentrate with someone as gorgeous as you teaching them?”
I blushed. His compliments might've been on the clichéd side, but they were the first ones I'd gotten in what felt like a long time. Ronald and I had been in one of those long-term couple ruts where compliments were few and far between, so having someone tell me how beautiful he thought I was, no matter how cheesy the line, was nice. Still, the attention made me squirm.
“What do you do?” I asked, almost blurting out the question to shift things away from me.
He looked pleased that I asked, but didn't answer until he downed his entire drink in one go. Wow. Definitely not a lightweight. I sipped at my Sea Breeze, taking it slow. My nerves, however, kept me coming back for more as Steven began to talk.
“I'm an advertising executive at Harman and Foreman.” He paused to speak to the bartender, “Bourbon this time. Neat.” He glanced at me. “And another Sea Breeze for the lady.”
I started to say that I didn't need another one, but then I glanced down and saw that my drink was already half gone. Apparently I'd been drinking more than I'd realized.
“Anyway,” he continued. “I started at the agency right out of college – Columbia, with honors – and got a promotion within six months.” His eyes ran down the full length of my body and then back again.
As I finished my drink, I let his words wash over me. It seemed that once I'd gotten the pump primed, he wasn't about to slow or stop. He told me all about how his company relied on him because he was the best at what he did. As our conversation shifted from his work to his hobbies, I got the impression that he was the best at everything he did – at least, according to him. A champion swimmer. Good enough to be a ski instructor. Better surfer than half those assholes who got all the attention in Hawaii.
If it hadn't been for the fact that I was halfway through my second Sea Breeze, I would've yawned and told him I was too tired to stay out any later, never-mind the fact that it was only eight o'clock. Instead, I decided to enjoy the free alcohol and let him drone on and on about what I was quickly beginning to understand was his favorite subject: himself.
“What do you think about that?”
I suddenly realized that he was asking me a question. I gave him my best charming smile and hoped he'd repeat what he was talking about so I didn't have to look like a complete idiot and
ask.
“I mean, I know most women don't like hockey, but I think if you saw me play, you'd feel differently.”
I resisted the urge to roll my eyes and it was harder than I thought. I needed to slow down on the drinks or I wouldn't be able to stop myself from blurting out whatever I was thinking. I tended to have impulse issues when I got drunk.
“I actually do like hockey,” I said. At least I wasn't slurring my words yet. “My brother played when we were kids.”
“Does he play now?” Steven asked. “Maybe he could go a little one-on-one with me so you could see my skills. I never disappoint when it comes to physical prowess.” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively and I almost laughed.
I finished my drink and set the glass on the counter. I frowned. When had I gotten a third one? I could've sworn I'd only had two, but there were three little stir stick things on the bar next to me. Another Sea Breeze had magically appeared. I knew it wasn't a good idea, especially since I hadn't eaten anything since my salad at lunch, but it was beckoning me, telling me that if I drank it, the last of the fuzzy hurt I was feeling would go away. I scowled at the glass as if it were personally responsible for the fact that I was pretty sure I was in for a hell of a hangover tomorrow.
“Are you okay?” The question should've been concerned, but it sounded more like Steven was annoyed that I'd interrupted what I was sure had been a fascinating story about something amazing he excelled at.
“I have to use the restroom,” I announced. I slid off of my stool, preparing to make a confident exit, only to find that I wasn't exactly in the best shape to stand.
Everything tilted as a wave of dizziness washed over me. I put out my hand to steady myself and heard breaking glass as I knocked my newest drink to the floor. Okay, I was more drunk than I'd thought. Was it possible I'd had more than three drinks? I thought hard as I worked to get my feet underneath me, but I wasn't doing so well at multi-tasking at the moment.
Steven stood and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a standing position. I managed to get my feet to stay and waited for him to let me go. He didn't. If anything, he held me more tightly so I had to crane my neck to look up at him. He smelled like some kind of aftershave, and while I was sure it was probably a good scent most of the time, at the moment, it was a bit overwhelming.