A gust of cold wind hit me as I stepped outside and I suddenly realized I'd left my jacket in my room. It was too late now to go back inside and get it. Besides, I could see the Bentley Cade used sitting at the edge of the parking lot. I hurried toward it, hugging myself now because of the cold. A particularly icy breeze went up my skirt and I gasped. My nipples were hard already, chafing against the soft cotton of my bra.
The back door of the car opened and I gratefully climbed in, keeping my knees tightly together even though my skirt was long enough that I probably wouldn't flash anyone. Cade sat less than a foot away, but didn't say a word as I closed the door. He reached up and tapped on the divider between us and the driver.
I smoothed down my skirt nervously as the car pulled out of the parking lot. “I only have a half hour for lunch, but I do have a planning period right after, so I can be a little late, but not too much.” I snapped my mouth shut, realizing I was getting dangerously close to babbling.
Cade still didn't speak. He wore that blank mask that meant he didn't want me to know what he was thinking. The car drove less than a quarter mile and then turned into the driveway of a small tech business. We moved around to the space in the back and parked.
When the silence continued for nearly a minute, I couldn't take it anymore. “What are we doing here?”
The mask cracked and Cade's eyes glinted. “Well, first, I'm going to have to punish you for being late, and I think you know what comes after that.”
Oh fuck.
Chapter 5
My heart was hammering against my ribs so hard I was surprised Cade couldn't hear it. My eyes darted from him to the divider. There was no way he was going to spank me, and definitely not in the backseat of a car with the driver in the front seat. Then his hand closed around my wrist and he pulled me to him and I realized that was exactly what he intended to do.
“Don't worry.” He pushed some hair away from my face. “The driver can't hear a thing up there.”
I wasn't sure I believed him, but I had the feeling I didn't really have much of choice in the matter.
“Now, for your punishment.” His free hand slid up my thigh and under the hem of my skirt. “Did you do as you were told?”
I nodded, unable to speak as I tried to accept what would happen next. The anticipation was nerve wracking and I was having a difficult time concentrating with Cade's hand on my bare thigh.
His hand moved higher and I parted my legs without having to be told. Cade chuckled and my arousal spiked. His laugh was quickly becoming one of my favorite sounds. His fingers brushed against my bare pussy and I sucked in a breath.
“I guess that means I only get to punish you for being late.”
“You sound disappointed.” I found my voice, breathless as it was.
“Oh, I am.” Cade's voice dropped. “Do you have any idea how long I've wanted to bend you over my knee?”
I tried to swallow but my mouth was suddenly dry.
“Remember your safe words?” he asked.
I nodded.
“Good.”
I let out an undignified yelp as he pulled me across his lap, easily manhandling me into place. I would've been completely mortified at the position I was in, but Cade was pushing up my skirt to expose my ass and my poor brain didn't know what to deal with first.
“You were five minutes late,” he said, running his palm over my bare cheeks. “So I think five swats would be fair.”
“Five?” Butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I knew it wasn't much, but this whole thing was playing hell on my nerves.
“Would you prefer ten?”
I shook my head.
“Relax,” he said. “Close your eyes.”
I did.
“Let yourself feel.”
I took a slow breath and as I let it out, Cade's hand came down. I heard the crack of his palm before I felt it, and then pain blossomed on my behind. I made a sound the second time, my hands tightening as it hurt more.
“Give yourself over to it, Aubree. Don’t fight it. Surrender.” Cade's voice was firm, but hypnotic. “That's two.”
I cried out when his hand came down again, this time on the same spot as the first. I could feel the heat spreading across my skin this time, a warmth moving through me in a way that wasn't entirely unpleasant. On the fourth, the contact made my pussy throb. The sound that came out of me was half-moan.
“Hmm, I think someone is enjoying this.” Cade sounded pleased. His fingers dipped down between my legs. “You're wet.”
My cheeks flamed, but I couldn't deny the way my body tightened when his hand came down for the last time. I dropped my head, embarrassed at how much I liked what he'd done.
Cade pulled me up, positioning me on my knees in front of him. He cupped my chin and raised my face so that our eyes met. “Did you like it?”
I tried to look away, but he wouldn't let me.
“Aubree, did you enjoy being spanked?” The hand not holding my chin pushed between my legs. “Don't lie to me. I can feel how wet you are.”
“I liked it,” I admitted. More heat flooded my face.
“Say it,” he demanded.
When I hesitated, he slid a finger inside me. I moaned.
“Say it.”
“I liked you spanking me.” A rush of shame washed over me. How had I gotten to this point?
“And I liked doing it.” Cade's voice was harsh. “Never feel guilty for what you enjoy.” He released my chin and removed his hand from between my legs. “Do you want me to fuck you?”
I nodded.
“Say it.”
“I want you to fuck me.” I blushed, but didn't drop my head so that was an improvement.
“And I want to fuck you,” he said. He pulled a condom from his pocket and set it on the seat next to him. “But I'm not going to touch you until you tell me what you like.”
I gave him a puzzled look. Hadn't I done that already?
“What are the things you enjoy that you feel like you shouldn't?” he asked. “The things that make you feel guilty when you fantasize or masturbate. The ones you'd always wished your ex-fiancé would do, but never had the courage to ask.”
After all the things we'd done together, this would be the one to break me. I couldn't do it. I couldn't confess those hidden things. My hands curled into fists.
He tilted his head, the expression on his face making me feel as if I was being studied. “Do you know what I would love to do to you?”
I nodded, hoping this meant he was being lenient about making me answer his question.
“I'd like to spend hours on your nipples.” His gaze flicked down to my plain cotton blouse. “Pull and twist and nibble on them until they were sensitive and swollen.”
I took a shuddering breath as my stomach twisted.
“Would you want me to do that?” he asked.
I nodded.
“And what else?”
I knew what he was doing, but I accepted it, let his question take me where he wanted me to go. I couldn't go back to work like this. I needed him. “I like it when you use your teeth.”
Cade's eyes darkened and he nodded, encouraging me to continue.
“And I like using mine.” It was the first time I ever admitted any of this out-loud. “I think I might enjoy toys. I don't want real pain, but a little edge...”
“Makes things more intense,” Cade finished the sentence.
“Yes,” I said.
“What about now?” he asked. “What do you want me to do to you now?”
“I want you to fuck me,” I repeated what I'd said before, but this time I went one step further, forcing myself out of my comfort zone. “Hard. I always felt like Ronald thought I was going to break or something. Everyone thinks I'm some fragile thing, but I'm stronger than I look. I'm not breakable.” I put my hands on Cade's thighs and felt his muscles tense. “I need you to fuck me like you're trying to break me. I want to feel you for the rest of the day.”
“Fuck, Aub
ree,” he groaned. He was reaching for me even as I moved onto the seat.
I sat on his thighs as my hands worked open his pants. By the time I'd freed his cock, he had the condom ready and rolled it onto his hard shaft. Before I could slide down on him, however, he flipped us so that I was sitting on the edge of the seat and he was kneeling on the floor in front of me. His hands gripped my hips so hard I knew there was a good chance I'd have bruises, and then he was burying himself inside me with one quick, hard thrust.
I screamed, my back arching, hands scrabbling at the seat for some sort of purchase, something to hold or tear, an outlet for everything I was feeling. Every nerve was on fire, a blaze of pain and pleasure. He stilled inside me, and I could feel his muscles trembling with the effort it took to keep from letting loose. But I didn't want him to hold back.
“Please,” I begged. “Please, Cade.”
He drew back and snapped his hips forward, drawing another wail from me as another wave of painful pleasure washed over me, more pleasure than pain this time. He didn't wait for me to ask him before he began to pound into me, using my hips as leverage to pull me toward him as he surged forward.
“Yes!” I cried out, my eyes closing. I could feel an orgasm approaching, something big. Then Cade's thumb brushed against my clit and I came so hard that, for a moment, it felt like everything had stopped, like the world was nothing but white, blinding pleasure.
When I opened my eyes, Cade was leaning over me, his breathing heavy. I hadn't even felt him come. When he pulled out, a shudder ran through me. I'd asked him to make me feel it for the rest of the day, and he'd certainly complied. I was probably going to be sore tomorrow too, but the good kind.
After a moment, I pushed myself up, grimacing at the wetness between my legs. Cade reached over to a small bag I hadn't seen before and opened it. He tossed me a pack of wet wipes and then got one out for himself. We cleaned ourselves up in silence and then he tapped on the window. As the car began to move, he returned to the seat next to me.
We pulled back into the school parking lot and I knew there was something else I had to do before I could go inside. Cade was probably going to laugh at me for this, but it was better than walking into the school without underwear. I unbuttoned my shirt.
“What are you doing?” He sounded mildly curious.
“I had to put my panties somewhere,” I said as I retrieved them. “And that was the best I could do on short notice.”
He laughed as I pulled on my panties and I had to smile too. After I'd done up my blouse again, I reached for the door.
“One more thing,” Cade said.
I paused, waiting for him to continue.
“We're going away for the weekend. I'll pick you up at your place on Friday at eight. You'll need to bring at least one dress appropriate for a night out... and some sexy lingerie.”
I smiled at him. I knew exactly what to pack. It was time.
Chapter 6
When I went back in to the school, I felt like every eye was on me, like everyone knew what I'd spent my lunchtime doing. It was ludicrous. No one had even been in the parking lot when I'd gotten in or out of the car. No one was in the hall when I swiped my card to go inside. In fact, I didn't see anyone the entire walk to my classroom, but Mindy was sitting at my desk waiting for me when I entered the room.
“Decided to step out for lunch?” A smirk played over her lips.
I glared at her but didn't respond. I wasn't the best liar, especially not to my friends.
“Might've helped if you actually took your lunch with you.” She gestured toward the container I'd put in the fridge that morning.
I glanced up at the clock and opened my fruit salad. The lunch period would be ending in just a few minutes which meant Mindy would have to leave for her next class. I stayed standing as I began to eat, grateful that Mindy was in my chair so I didn't have to try to explain myself if I happened to wince when I sat down. The spanking hadn't been bad, but combined with Cade’s roughness, it was probably going to make sitting for the next couple hours a bit awkward.
“You were with him, weren't you?”
I chewed on a piece of cantaloupe and refused to answer, though I was sure my face was bright red and answer enough.
“Damn, girl.” Mindy shook her head as she stood. “I just hope this guy isn't ruining you for real men. Because, trust me, this whole fairy tale thing is not realistic. Soon, you're going to have to come back down to the real world with the rest of us.”
Mindy's words stuck with me for the rest of the day. Was it possible that Cade’s instructions would make it harder for me to have a relationship because he’d become what I'd expect from a boyfriend? From a lover? Would anyone be able to measure up to Cade? And I didn't just mean sexually, though there was that. The question that really hit me as I was walking to my car, however, was: did I want anyone else to try to measure up?
When I got home, I went to my closet and pulled out the clothes I'd packed away. I set the box on my bed and opened it, my heart hammering in my chest. I wasn’t sure why I was so nervous, but my hands were trembling. The first thing I'd thought when Cade said we were going away for the weekend was the contents of this box. Now, I wondered if I had been thinking about wearing these clothes not because I was ready to move on but because these were the clothes I would want to share with a boyfriend.
Those were dangerous thoughts. Especially when Cade was concerned.
I took out the garment on top. A brand-new, dark purple bikini I'd bought specifically for lounging around the cruise ship pool. I set it aside and went on to the next. A sheer black teddy with a series of laces down the sides so that it could be unlaced and easily removed. The deep blue dress I'd planned on wearing on the plane to the coast where Ronald and I would board the ship. Under that was the matching bra and panty set I'd intended to wear under the simple, but cute dress.
I felt a pang of sadness as I remembered how I'd picked out these items, wondering what Ronald would think of me in each one. I remembered how pretty I'd felt. These were clothes I felt comfortable in, not because I thought they hid me, but because I genuinely liked the way I looked in them. And I hadn't gotten to wear them for anyone.
They were special and the fact that I'd thought of them first meant I was thinking of this weekend as something more than just sex. Cade hadn't said or done anything to make me think that spending a couple days together was anything but business, but the idea of uninterrupted days and nights with him had me thinking along lines that were best left alone.
Problem was, my brain didn't want to leave things alone. All Wednesday night, all day Thursday and into Friday, I found myself wondering about the non-sexual things Cade and I would do together, the things we would talk about. Would I finally be able to get beneath that mask and get to know the man? Would we talk about things that had nothing to do with my sex life? More than once, I imagined what it would be like to fall asleep in his arms, to wake up next to him. Almost like we were a real couple.
By the time I was staring at the clock and wishing the bell would just ring already, I was forced to admit that I was in deep. I tried to convince myself for the past couple days that the only reason I was fantasizing about this trip was because I'd been so excited about my honeymoon and I hadn't gotten to take it. I told myself I wanted to know more about Cade because he was actually a decent guy. But while there was some truth to that reasoning, I knew it wasn't all there was.
Despite what I'd told Cade, despite the warnings I'd given myself and the promises I'd made that things between the two of us would only be business, I could no longer deny that I was falling for him.
I'd always known this was a possibility. For me, sex and emotion had always been linked. This arrangement with Cade had been, in part, an effort to change that for me. But I couldn't say I was surprised I was having a problem separating the two. Even after I'd learned what Cade was, I'd been drawn to him. Sure, I was physically attracted to him, but it had always been more th
an that. It was his confidence, the way he was so sure of himself. But there was also a part of him hidden, a part of him I wanted to know more about. I'd glimpsed that man on a few occasions, usually when I'd done something to catch him off guard, and what I'd seen just made me want to know him more.
I knew I couldn't act on it. First, because I knew he didn't feel the same way. He didn't do love or emotions. There was physical attraction and pleasure, but nothing more. And, second, because any mention of my feelings would result in Cade ending our arrangement.
Eventually, the way I felt would either go away or they'd reveal themselves, but for right now, I was going to pretend nothing had changed, that I was emotionally unattached. I knew that meant I'd end up getting hurt in the long run, but I couldn't help it. If I confessed, he'd leave me, and I didn't think I could handle losing him. Not yet.
So, after the final bell rang and the last of my students left, I packed up my things, reminded Mindy that I'd miss dinner because I was going on a trip, and then headed home to finish packing and grab a bite to eat.
I dressed in the outfit I'd intended to wear to the ship, knowing it would travel well. I was also wearing the matching bra and panty set I'd bought to surprise Ronald. I just hoped Cade would like what I'd picked. The dress was more conservative than what he'd had me wear before, but what I had on underneath was sexier. It reflected who I was more than anything I'd ever worn. An attractive exterior that didn't get much attention, but with desires that were a bit on the wild side. Just how wild, I was still figuring out.
Cade knocked on my door at five till eight and I was ready to go. He gave me an approving once over as he stepped inside the apartment.
“I forgot to tell you to bring your passport.”
My stomach flipped. My passport. I knew where it was, of course. It was in the same place it had been since the end of the second week in August when I'd learned I didn't need it after all.
“I'll go get it.” I went back into my bedroom and opened the top left drawer of my dresser. It was empty except for my passport. It had seemed fitting to put it in that specific drawer, the one Ronald had used when we'd been together. I'd packed his shit up after I'd received a box delivered with all of my things that had been at his place.