He couldn’t go on like this. It was inhuman. It wasn’t even animalistic. An animal would never destroy its kill out of anger. What he had done had been an evil act in Ronan’s opinion, and something had to be done. He would not allow himself to devolve into this thing, a destroyer, a beast who enjoyed killing for the pleasure and power of it.
No matter how much he loved his mountain home, the cougar inside him demanded his mate. His cat would not be pacified by anything else. Ronan had come up close and personal with the result of denying his cougar’s demands. He let out a deep sigh and wiped a stray tear from the corner of his eye.
The taste of the doe’s blood still lingered on his lips, and he flicked his tongue over them as he panted hot breaths into the cold air. Standing tall on his bare feet to look around him, he gazed at the forest he loved. In that moment he made a decision.
He realized that he had been a coward. He had let an adolescent heartbreak beat him. He’d let the wolf pack take away his pride. He’d run from his problems and had hidden from them for over a decade. He would no longer let his teenage crush rule his life.
He’d let Makayla slip through his fingers. She had come to him as if by a gift from the gods, and he knew that she was his rightful mate. There was no question about it. He couldn’t live without her. He wouldn’t live without her.
Ronan slipped into cougar form and pounced down the hill and through the forest. His mind was made. He was going to find her.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Makayla eyed her staff, waiting for someone to have the courage to speak first. Living with a shapeshifter for a week had taught her a thing or two about intimidation, and she used everything she knew to sling daggers into her disloyal staff. She saw them gulp, the sweat break on their brows. She saw their eyes dilate.
Makayla licked her lips. She almost felt like a predator. Maybe Ronan had rubbed off on her more than she realized.
“Isn’t anyone going to speak?” she demanded.
“Makayla, we made a decision and went with it. Just like you always tell us to do,” said Lorna with a haughty tone in her voice.
Makayla stared at Lorna, waiting a beat before speaking. “And what caused this particular decision to be made? The magazine edition was nearly complete before I went missing. You changed the entire thing. I should fire every last one of you for this insubordination. What exactly were you trying to accomplish here?”
“We wanted to make this edition reflect the current culture in Portland, it…”
“Who’s current culture? This does not reflect our demographic at all. I’ve been over the numbers, and I can only see the slightest percentage of greater approval in a demographic that hasn’t even historically read this magazine. This is a disaster. Whatever anecdotal evidence you have to support your claim, the numbers don’t lie.”
Lorna stood and walked down the conference table toward Makayla. Lorna put a stack of printouts in front of Makayla and walked back to her chair. “Those are articles from local bloggers, endorsing the magazine to their readers. This is an audience that is estimated in the tens of thousands. It will translate into a wider readership within a month. I’d bet my career on it.”
“And you just may have. This meeting is over. Everyone back to work. Lorna, you stay.”
The staff filed out, and Lorna sat at the other end of the conference table looking snotty as hell. Makayla wanted to pounce on the table and rip the look off the girl’s face.
“Why shouldn’t I fire you right now, Lorna?”
“I’ve pleaded my case. What else can I say?”
Makayla sighed. She hated being the bad guy. In her six years as editor, she’d never had to do anything remotely like this. Sure, she’d had to fire people before, but it had never been over such an act of disloyalty. But maybe Lorna had a point, the bloggers were really advocating the magazine.
Makayla squeezed the bridge of her nose and pressed her eyes shut for a brief moment. She opened her eyes and tapped her fingertips on the table as she read over the blogs about the magazine.
“Alright, Lorna. You are hereby on trial. No paid vacation days, and we cut your benefits until such time that you can prove you have the magazine’s best interest at heart. This stunt was unacceptable. But I do see that you have a point here. That is the only reason I’m not firing you. You had better keep your nose clean. If I even smell a hint of another conspiracy like this, you will be out of here so fast, you won’t know what hit you. And you can forget a reference. Do you understand?”
“Yes. Thank you Makayla. I wanted to go over more of the new demographic information with you…”
“Not now. We’ll put together an alternative lifestyle section. Nothing too racy. It has to be whitewashed for our normal readers. Nothing else is going to make it through, but I am willing to add the section. That is all you’re going to get from me right now. Now get back to work before I change my mind.”
Lorna gathered her things with a smile and left the room. Makayla leaned back in her chair and sighed. The girl reminded her of herself in a lot of ways. She had guts that was for sure. But going behind Makayla’s back was not the right way to go about doing things. She thought maybe she was making a mistake by keeping Lorna on, but she’d made the decision and would live with it.
Makayla stood from her chair and went back to her office. The rest of the day she spent doing damage control and fielding angry phone calls from advertisers. By the end of the day, she was exhausted. Her mind flitted to the simple life she’d lived with Ronan in the woods.
What she wouldn’t give to be with him now. But there was no way she could leave the career she’d spent the last fifteen years of her life building to go live like a hermit in the woods.
As night descended and Makayla realized it was already after nine, she grabbed her purse and coat and left the building. She walked down the street to a high class bar where many of the local business people unwound and ordered a Cosmo.
As she took her first sip of her drink, she spied her ex “friends with benefits,” Mark. Before she could pull away to hide in the shadows at the back of the bar, he spotted her and quickly crossed the room.
“Makayla,” he said happily before kissing her cheek.
She smiled up at him as they greeted each other. She felt awkward but wouldn’t show it. It still burned her that he threw her over for a skinny twenty-year-old.
“Come join me,” he said as he pulled her to his table. She didn’t resist when she noticed that he was alone. “How have you been? I heard you’d gone missing. What happened?”
“It’s a long story,” she said, taking another sip of her Cosmo.
“Didn’t you get rescued by some mountain man recluse or something?”
“Something along those lines. He was a good person though.”
“I’m sure he was. Salt of the earth and all that.”
“Yes,” Makayla hissed. She didn’t want to discuss Ronan with Mark of all people. “And how have you been? How is…” She snapped her fingers. “What was her name? That recent college grad intern of yours?”
“Tiffany. And Tiffany and I aren’t together anymore. She went back to grad school and boys her own age. I was never fond of playing ‘daddy’ anyway. At least, not like that. I remember playing daddy with you was quite pleasurable.”
“Mark, please…”
“You’re looking lovely, Makayla. I can’t help but remember the good times we shared.”
“It wasn’t me who broke it off. If I remember correctly.”
“My mistake. I was distracted by a piece of candy. Can you forgive me?”
Mark’s manicured good looks had once been enticingly attractive to Makayla. After being with Ronan, Mark just looked fake and plastic.
“I could forgive you, Mark, if you hadn’t rubbed it in my face.”
“I never meant to rub it in your face, Mak. You know you’re my girl. We’ve been friends for years. Our extracurricular activities never came between us before.”
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Makayla took another sip of her drink and looked past Mark at the wall. The dim lights of the bar twinkled on the glittering mini-dress of a woman walking by as a man in a tailored suit followed her outside.
This was Makayla’s life. The life in the woods was like a dream. She couldn’t let it change her so much. She looked at Mark and examined his broad shoulders and perfectly straight, white teeth. His brown eyes twinkled at her as he flashed her a million dollar smile and unbuttoned his jacket.
She sighed and put her hand on his. “Maybe another time, Mark. I appreciate the invitation, but I’m still shell shocked from the car accident. No hard feelings.”
Makayla stood from her chair and gave Mark a passing peck on the cheek before she picked up her things and left.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Ronan ran all night to Mystic Harbor with a bundle of clothes strapped to his back. When he reached town, the sun was rising over the mountains in long yellow fingers that colored the writhing ocean.
In a stand of trees, just beyond the highway, he shifted and pulled on his clothes. Striding into town on foot, he was passed by pickup trucks zooming down the road.
Mothers and fathers walked their children to school. Delivery trucks backed behind the grocery store. Boats left the harbor, headed out to sea. The activities of early morning brought a flood of memories to Ronan’s mind.
He’d lived in this village all his life before he’d taken to the woods. There were new buildings on Main Street. Businesses he didn’t recognized now occupied the spaces of businesses he once knew.
Part of him felt a sense of loss for having missed it all. He’d been away for so long, his heart hurt in recognition of his childhood home. He made his way past the diner and watched the locals and tourists eating breakfast through the window as he walked by. The front door of the diner burst open as he approached.
Out stepped a pretty redhead in her early thirties. Nelly Fitzpatrick stood right in front of him looking as lovely as the last time he’d seen her at eighteen. She wore a pink waitress uniform and had her hair back in a high ponytail that swung behind her.
“Ronan Harding! I’ll be damned. It is you,” she said approaching him as if to give him a hug.
“Nelly,” was all he said. He let her put her arms around him, but his body felt completely numb.
“I haven’t seen you in years! I heard you went to live alone on the mountain. What brings you to town?”
“A woman.”
“Oh…” she said, stepping back. She brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “Well, you might not know it, but Hank and I broke up a while back. I couldn’t handle him telling me what to do all the time, like he owned me. It never felt right anyway. Not like it did with you.”
Ronan didn’t respond. He just looked at her as if he were experiencing a dream. She was the same woman he had loved, but he felt nothing, nothing but pity.
“I have a little boy now. He looks like his father, but he’s the love of my life. Hank doesn’t help much. That’s why I’m working here. I guess I’ve fallen a long way.” She crossed her arms over her chest and frowned as if realizing her mistakes fifteen years too late.
“Sorry to hear about you and Hank, Nelly. I hope you and your boy are doing okay.” He meant it. He didn’t wish her ill, but he definitely didn’t have feelings for her anymore.
“Thanks, Ronan. I always knew I made the wrong decision when I let you go.”
“Take care now, Nelly,” he said, leaning in to pat her on the shoulder. “I’ll see you around.”
He walked past, realizing for the first time how much he’d allowed his love of Nelly to dominate his life. And it wasn’t even about loving her, it was about his humiliation at losing her. The pain and anger he felt when her brothers beat him within an inch of his life.
Sure, he’d loved the girl, but it wasn’t worth throwing away all of society for. It was as if a massive weight slid from his back, and he could suddenly stand up straight again for the first time in fifteen years.
He took a deep breath and a wide smile broke on his face. Striding toward Ashton’s house, Ronan felt gleeful for the first time he could remember in a long time.
Turning a corner into a residential neighborhood, Ronan spied the house that had been his home growing up. Ashton had stayed in their parents’ house after they had died in a freak boating accident a year ago. They’d left things to both of them, things Ronan had ignored all this time.
The house was a big, old Victorian in desperate need of repair. Ronan grimaced as he looked at his parents’ pride and joy. Ashton had a lot of explaining to do. He knocked on the front door and was met by his blurry eyed brother in a short pink bathrobe. Ronan smirked and Ashton looked at him as if he didn’t recognize his own brother.
“Why is the railing falling off the front porch, brother?”
“Well, nice to see you too,” Ashton said, turning inside and stumbling past the mess in the living room.
Ronan followed him inside and closed the front door. “This place is a disaster area. Don’t tell me you’re using this place as a party house.”
“I’m using it as my house.” Ashton moved into the big open kitchen that had once been gleaming and new but now looked like the set of a horror movie in a frat house. Beer bottles and pizza boxes littered every counter. And the sink was leaking.
Ashton poured himself a cup of coffee and offered one to Ronan. Usually, Ronan would refuse coffee, but he was in a mood to have worldly experiences so he accepted.
They went to sit at the dining room table. Ashton moved some dirty clothes and papers away and they were able to see each other. After a few sips, Ashton looked as if his mind was beginning to thaw from his obvious hang over.
“What brings you to town, brother?”
Ronan sipped his first cup of coffee in fifteen years and let the bitter brew slide over his tongue. It was invigorating.
“I’ve come to get my mate back,” he said, giving Ashton a meaningful look.
“Nelly? Well, she’s working at the diner now. I’m sure you could get her if you wanted. A lot of other guys have.” Ashton chuckled and then cringed before rubbing his head.
“No. Not Nelly. Makayla.”
“Oh. The woman I rescued from your cabin? She’s your mate? Why’d you let her get away?”
“I need to borrow your car,” Ronan said, rising. He was done with this conversation. He needed to get to Portland as soon as possible to claim the woman he loved. He would deal with his brother’s treatment of their parents’ house later.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Makayla stepped into the office, wearing a tailored pencil skirt and a crisp white shirt. She had on a shade of deep red lipstick that made her feel sexy and confident, and her jet black hair was pulled back into a tight bun.
The staff cowered as she walked by. As they should, after the stunt they pulled. She still felt like firing the lot of them. The other part of her felt hurt that she’d been betrayed. It shook her confidence to a degree she’d never felt before. It made her want to start over completely, somewhere she had more control, somewhere that her vision was respected and shared.
She made it to her office, and Elliot gave her the run down for the day. There was still so much damage control to deal with that Makayla could barely stay focused on Elliot’s words. She was distracted by thoughts of Ronan and how easy it would have been for her to just stay. All she had to do was stay.
The staff had made the mess. Why should she have to pick up the pieces? Lorna had torn down everything Makayla had built in one swipe. If Makayla was so easy to replace, why was she even still here? She tore herself away from the spiral of negative thoughts and focused on Elliot’s words.
“Yes. I’ll deal with that after lunch,” she said, referring to one of their main advertisers who had threatened to pull every ad for the rest of the year. “In the meantime, bring me the proofs for next month’s issue. This edition has to be spot on, or we might all be out of a job.??
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Elliot scurried off to retrieve the proofs that were ready for the next month’s issue and Makayla turned around in her chair and looked out the window at the Portland skyline.
She’d loved this view since the first day she took the chair as editor in chief of Portland Living Magazine. Today, the busy streets below the towering skyscrapers made her feel cold and alone. She pinched the bridge of her nose and stood.
Striding over to the wall length window on her Louboutins, she couldn’t help but think of the safety of Ronan’s arms. What was the use of all this if she didn’t have the loyalty of her staff? What was the use of it if it all suddenly felt so empty?
She crossed her arms over her chest and looked down at the ground several stories below. The traffic moved slowly through the packed streets in the never ending river of cars.
She turned back to her desk and picked up her cell phone before dialing Mark’s number. Why not pick things up where they’d left them off? Mark was her steady thing. They knew each other. She knew what to expect.
The phone rang and went to voice mail.
“This is Makayla. I changed my mind. Call me.” She hung up the phone and put it back down on the table just as Elliot burst through her office door. Her eyes almost burst out of her head when she saw who walked through the door behind her assistant.
“Ronan,” she breathed, grasping her heart.
“Makayla.” Ronan crossed the room in several long strides and took her in his arms. Makayla’s heart burst inside her chest as Ronan’s lips crushed against hers.
He held her tight to his chest, holding her as if he never wanted to let her go. His hands roved over her body and down over her hips, until they cupped her round behind.
“I’ll just…be back later,” Elliot said, stepping backwards out the door.
When Ronan finally let her up for air, she felt dizzy and faint. Caught between surprise and relief, for once Makayla was at a loss for words. “What are you doing here?” she finally asked.