CHAPTER xi.
AN ENTERPRISE.
Cecilia now had no time for afterthoughts or anxious repentance, sincenotwithstanding the hurry of her spirits, and the confusion of her mind,she had too much real business, to yield to pensive indulgence.
Averse to all falsehood, she invented none upon this occasion; shemerely told her guests she was summoned to London upon an affair ofimportance; and though she saw their curiosity, not being at liberty tosatisfy it with the truth, she attempted not to appease it by fiction,but quietly left it to its common fare, conjecture. She would gladlyhave made Henrietta the companion of her journey, but Henrietta was thelast to whom that journey could give pleasure. She only, therefore, tookher maid in the chaise, and, attended by one servant on horseback, atsix o'clock the next morning, she quitted her mansion, to enter into anengagement by which soon she was to resign it for ever.
Disinterested as she was, she considered her situation as peculiarlyperverse, that from the time of her coming to a fortune which mostothers regarded as enviable, she had been a stranger to peace, afruitless seeker of happiness, a dupe to the fraudulent, and a prey tothe needy! the little comfort she had received, had been merely fromdispensing it, and now only had she any chance of being happy herself,when upon the point of relinquishing what all others built theirhappiness upon obtaining!
These reflections only gave way to others still more disagreeable; shewas now a second time engaged in a transaction she could not approve,and suffering the whole peace of her future life to hang upon an actiondark, private and imprudent: an action by which the liberal kindness ofher late uncle would be annulled, by which the father of her intendedhusband would be disobeyed, and which already, in a similar instance,had brought her to affliction and disgrace. These melancholy thoughtshaunted her during the whole journey, and though the assurance ofMrs Delvile's approbation was some relief to her uneasiness, sheinvoluntarily prepared herself for meeting new mortifications, and wastormented with an apprehension that this second attempt made her meritthem.
She drove immediately, by the previous direction of Delvile, to alodging-house in Albemarle Street, which he had taken care to haveprepared for her reception. She then sent for a chair, and went to MrsDelvile's. Her being seen by the servants of that house was not veryimportant, as their master was soon to be acquainted with the realmotive of her journey.
She was shewn into a parlour, while Mrs Delvile was informed of herarrival, and there flown to by Delvile with the most grateful eagerness.Yet she saw in his countenance that all was not well, and heard uponenquiry that his mother was considerably worse. Extremely shockedby this intelligence, she already began to lament her unfortunateenterprise. Delvile struggled, by exerting his own spirits, to restorehers, but forced gaiety is never exhilarating; and, full of care andanxiety, he was ill able to appear sprightly and easy.
They were soon summoned upstairs into the apartment of Mrs Delvile, whowas lying upon a couch, pale, weak, and much altered. Delvile led theway, saying, "Here, madam, comes one whose sight will bring peace andpleasure to you!"
"This, indeed," cried Mrs Delvile, half rising and embracing her, "isthe form in which they are most welcome to me! virtuous, noble Cecilia!what honour you do my son! with what joy, should I ever recover, shall Iassist him in paying the gratitude he owes you!"
Cecilia, grieved at her situation, and affected by her kindness, couldonly answer with her tears; which, however, were not shed alone; forDelvile's eyes were full, as he passionately exclaimed, "This, this isthe sight my heart has thus long desired! the wife of my choice takento the bosom of the parent I revere! be yet but well, my beloved mother,and I will be thankful for every calamity that has led to so sweet aconclusion!"
"Content yourself, however, my son, with one of us," cried Mrs Delvile,smiling; "and content yourself, if you can, though your hard lot shouldmake that one this creature of full bloom, health, and youth! Ah, mylove," added she, more seriously, and addressing the still weepingCecilia, "should now Mortimer, in losing me, lose those cares by whichalone, for some months past, my life has been rendered tolerable, howpeaceably shall I resign him to one so able to recompense his filialpatience and services!"
This was not a speech to stop the tears of Cecilia, though such warmthof approbation quieted her conscientious scruples. Delvile now earnestlyinterfered; he told her that his mother had been ordered not to talk orexert herself, and entreated her to be composed, and his mother to besilent.
"Be it _your_ business, then," said Mrs Delvile, more gaily, "to findus entertainment. We will promise to be very still if you will take thattrouble upon yourself."
"I will not," answered he, "be rallied from my purpose; if I cannotentertain, it will be something to weary you, for that may incline youto take rest, which will he answering a better purpose."
"Mortimer," returned she, "is this the ingenuity of duty or of love?and which are you just now thinking of, my health, or a conversationuninterrupted with Miss Beverley?"
"Perhaps a little of both!" said he, chearfully, though colouring.
"But you rather meant it should pass," said Mrs Delvile, "you werethinking only of me? I have always observed, that where one schemeanswers two purposes, the ostensive is never the purpose most at heart."
"Why it is but common prudence," answered Delvile, "to feel our way alittle before we mention what we most wish, and so cast the hazard ofthe refusal upon something rather less important."
"Admirably settled!" cried Mrs Delvile: "so my rest is but to prove MissBeverley's disturbance!--Well, it is only anticipating our future way oflife, when her disturbance, in taking the management of you to herself,will of course prove my rest."
She then quietly reposed herself, and Delvile discoursed with Ceciliaupon their future plans, hopes and actions.
He meant to set off from the church-door to Delvile Castle, to acquainthis father with his marriage, and then to return instantly to London:there he entreated Cecilia to stay with his mother, that, finding themboth together, he might not exhaust her patience, by making his partingvisit occasion another journey to Suffolk.
But here Cecilia resolutely opposed him; saying, her only chance toescape discovery, was going instantly to her own house; and representingso earnestly her desire that their marriage should be unknown till hisreturn to England, upon a thousand motives of delicacy, propriety, andfearfulness, that the obligation he owed already to a compliance whichhe saw grew more and more reluctant, restrained him both in gratitudeand pity from persecuting her further. Neither would she consent toseeing him in Suffolk; which could but delay his mother's journey, andexpose her to unnecessary suspicions; she promised, however, to writeto him often, and as, from his mother's weakness, he must travel veryslowly, she took a plan of his route, and engaged that he should find aletter from her at every great town.
The bond which he had already had altered, he insisted upon leaving inher own custody, averse to applying to Mr Monckton, whose behaviour tohim had before given him disgust, and in whom Cecilia herself nolonger wished to confide. He had again applied to the same lawyer, MrSingleton, to give her away; for though to his secrecy he had no tie, hehad still less to any entire stranger. Mrs Delvile was too ill to attendthem to church, nor would Delvile have desired from her such absolutedefiance of his father.
Cecilia now gave another sigh to her departed friend Mrs Charlton, whosepresence upon this awful occasion would else again have soothed andsupported her. She had no female friend in whom she could rely; butfeeling a repugnance invincible to being accompanied only by men, sheaccepted the attendance of Mrs Delvile's own woman, who had lived manyyears in the family, and was high in the favour and confidence of herlady.
The arrangement of these and other articles, with occasionalinterruptions from Mrs Delvile, fully employed the evening. Delvilewould not trust again to meeting her at the church; but begged her tosend out her servants between seven and eight o'clock in the morning, atwhich time he would himself call for her with a chair.
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She went away early, that Mrs Delvile might go to rest, and it wasmutually agreed they should risk no meeting the next day. Delvileconjured them to part with firmness and chearfulness, and Cecilia,fearing her own emotion, would have retired without bidding her adieu.But Mrs Delvile, calling after her, said, "Take with you my blessing!"and tenderly embracing her, added, "My son, as my chief nurse, claimsa prescriptive right to govern me, but I will break from his control totell my sweet Cecilia what ease and what delight she has already givento my mind! my best hope of recovery is founded on the pleasure Ianticipate to witnessing your mutual happiness: but should my illnessprove fatal, and that felicity be denied me, my greatest earthly care isalready removed by the security I feel of Mortimer's future peace. Takewith you, then, my blessing, for you are become one to me! long daughterof my affection, now wife of my darling son! love her, Mortimer, asshe merits, and cherish her with tenderest gratitude!--banish, sweetestCecilia, every apprehension that oppresses you, and receive in MortimerDelvile a husband that will revere your virtues, and dignify yourchoice!"
She then embraced her again, and seeing that her heart was too full forspeech, suffered her to go without making any answer. Delvile attendedher to her chair, scarce less moved than herself, and found onlyopportunity to entreat her punctuality the next morning.
She had, indeed, no inclination to fail in her appointment, or riskthe repetition of scenes so affecting, or situations so alarming. MrsDelvile's full approbation somewhat restored to her her own, but nothingcould remove the fearful anxiety, which still privately tormented herwith expectations of another disappointment.
The next morning she arose with the light, and calling all her courageto her aid, determined to consider this day as decisive of her destinywith regard to Delvile, and, rejoicing that at least all suspense wouldbe over, to support herself with fortitude, be that destiny what itmight.
At the appointed time she sent her maid to visit Mrs Hill, and gave someerrands to her man that carried him to a distant part of the town: butshe charged them both to return to the lodgings by nine o'clock, atwhich hour she ordered a chaise for returning into the country.
Delvile, who was impatiently watching for their quitting the house, onlywaited till they were out of sight, to present himself at the door. Hewas shewn into a parlour, where she instantly attended him; and beingtold that the clergyman, Mr Singleton, and Mrs Delvile's woman, werealready in the church, she gave him her hand in silence, and he led herto the chair.
The calmness of stifled hope had now taken place in Cecilia of quicksensations and alarm. Occupied with a firm belief she should never bethe wife of Delvile, she only waited, with a desperate sort of patience,to see when and by whom she was next to be parted from him.
When they arrived near the church, Delvile stopt the chair. He handedCecilia out of it, and discharging the chairmen, conducted her into thechurch. He was surprised himself at her composure, but earnestly wishingit to last, took care not to say to her a word that should make anyanswer from her necessary.
He gave her, as before, to Mr Singleton, secretly praying that not, asbefore, she might be given him in vain: Mrs Delvile's woman attendedher; the clergyman was ready, and they all proceeded to the altar.
The ceremony was begun; Cecilia, rather mechanically than withconsciousness, appearing to listen to it but at the words, _If any mancan shew any just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together_,Delvile himself shook with terror, lest some concealed person shouldagain answer it, and Cecilia, with a sort of steady dismay in hercountenance, cast her eyes round the church, with no other view thanthat of seeing from what corner the prohibiter would start.
She looked, however, to no purpose; no prohibiter appeared, the ceremonywas performed without any interruption, and she received the thanksof Delvile, and the congratulations of the little set, before the ideawhich had so strongly pre-occupied her imagination, was sufficientlyremoved from it to satisfy her she was really married.
They then went to the vestry, where their business was not long; andDelvile again put Cecilia into a chair, which again he accompanied onfoot.
Her sensibility now soon returned, though still attended withstrangeness and a sensation of incredulity. But the sight of Delvile ather lodgings, contrary to their agreement, wholly recovered hersenses from the stupor which had dulled them. He came, however, but toacknowledge how highly she had obliged him, to see her himself restoredto the animation natural to her, character, and to give her a millionof charges, resulting from anxiety and tenderness. And then, fearing thereturn of her servants, he quitted her, and set out for Delvile Castle.
The amazement of Cecilia was still unconquerable; to be actually unitedwith Delvile! to be his with the full consent of his mother,--to havehim her's, beyond the power of his father,--she could not reconcile itwith possibility; she fancied it a dream,--but a dream from which shewished not to wake.
BOOK X.