I sighed. If I wanted to get James to emotionally connect with me, I had to get to know him better by talking to him more instead of indulging our time together simply being physical. I wasn't going to win over his heart any time soon by doing that. Sex was simply a form of physical pleasure. Nothing more. Love, however, was a different story. There was emotional connection involved, and spending most of what little time I had with him wasn't going to help.
Tonight, I thought determinedly, I'd talk to him, including the subject I dreaded most, which was returning to Mystic Spring after leaving Las Vegas.
I flipped the duvet away, intending to get myself ready for what was left of the day. The moment I did so, however, I saw my own naked body. There were new bruises on my skin, one on my right breast and one on my belly. I glanced lower and my gaze lingered on my left thigh, where there were fresh teeth marks from early this morning. Afterward, of course, James had seductively licked me as if he were some sort of wildcat to soothe my pain and heal my new wound.
I shuddered at the thought. When he bit and then licked me, my core twisted in a frenzy of heat and my nectar excitedly flowed into his awaiting mouth.
I bit my lip at that hot thought. I knew I was weird in this way, loving the fact James did those humiliatingly shameful things to me most people thought repulsive. But I didn't care. He made me feel beautiful, wonderful, and alive, and I certainly didn't care what the world thought of me.
With a smile on my lips, I got out of bed and headed into the bathroom to get ready. About twenty minutes later, I was dressed in a pretty white blouse and short skirt. My face was made up neutrally with a hint of dark mascara and pink lip-gloss, my hair in a loose bun atop my head.
After having breakfast, I headed to the foyer. With Patrick once again my chauffer, I headed over to the hospital.
After a half-hour drive, we arrived.
As soon as I'd taken my seat beside his bed, Andy declared, "I'm going to be discharged in two days."
I smiled, pleased at the news. "That's good," I said. "And how are you this morning?" I noted he looked better today. He had more color to his skin, and the bruises on his handsome face were fast disappearing.
My brother shrugged as if the pain didn't bother him as much as before. "Better than yesterday," he said matter-of-fact. "I can't wait to get out of here. This place is boring me stiff."
I chuckled. I could understand that. Andy was a very active young man. Being cooped up in bed just wasn't his thing.
Suddenly, my thoughts went to yesterday's scenario.
I hadn't stayed long, just barely half an hour. How could I after what I'd witnessed? Matt confessing his love to my brother and kissing him passionately, the way James kissed me, with that uninhibited hunger that could never be satisfied. Furthermore, Matt orbited around Andy, his eyes sharp like a mother hen, concerned about almost every groaning pain that escaped his mouth.
I wanted to ask Andy about his relationship with Matt. I wanted to hear it from him that they were serious, that they were... gay. I wanted to know Andy was okay with being that way, with having that type of sexual relationship.
Of course it was okay with me. I supported him in every type of relationship he wanted... desired. I'd never judged him, or anybody for that matter, for who they were or what they wanted or chose to be. This included individual sexual interests and orientation.
"Andy?" I started slowly, gazing at him. "Umm..."
Andy looked at me, eyes questioning. "What?"
I licked my lips nervously. Gosh! This was harder than I thought. I took a deep breath and tried again. "Are you...?" I licked my lips again. "Are you and Matt... in a relationship?"
Andy frowned and stiffened. "What? You..."
I shook my head in the negative, afraid he thought I was judging him, that I despised him for being that way.
"No, Andy," I said quickly, shaking my head furiously. "I'm not against it. I'll support you in every relationship."
Andy watched me for a moment, and then he seemed to relax. He cast his eyes downward and smiled slightly. "I thought you'd..."
I shook my head again. "You're my brother, Andy," I said. "There's no way I'd do anything to upset you."
He gritted his teeth, and as if he couldn't help himself, he grabbed me into his arms and hugged me tight. "This relationship between me and Matt," he said into my hair, his voice hoarse, emotional. "It's complicated."
I nodded because I knew what he said was true. It was complicated, and it would take time for them to work it out. They were two very different people, after all, with very different personalities and completely different upbringings. Andy had been an orphan who'd lived in a shitty, poor neighborhood with an aunt who'd never loved him and an uncle who'd abused and sexually molested him. As for Matt, well, one could only surmise he was born on a silver platter, with his every need and desire fulfilled to perfection by those below him.
Come to think of it, James and I were kind of in the same boat as Andy and Matt. James and I had completely different personalities and polar opposite upbringings. To further our unconventional relationship into one of love would be very difficult, tempered with misunderstandings and miscommunication. Those troubled thoughts, of course, depressed me.
When I finally moved back from Andy's embrace, I gazed at him. Yes, I thought, Andy and I would always be cautious people. Though he would be more so than me because of what he'd been through.
"You know, Andy, I don't like Matt very much. He's an overbearing man."
Andy chuckled at my declaration. He seemed to agree with me. "He is, isn't he?"
I noted the softness of his eyes and the slight smile on his lips, however. This told me he either found Matt's personality amusing or he didn't mind.
Sometime later, while Andy and I were chatting about Matt, or more like gossiping behind the man's back, telling one another what we thought about him and bringing up his many bad points, my cell rang. I noted that it was Savanah.
"I have to get this," I said, picking up the phone.
"Sure. Take your time," he replied, relaxing back in his bed and picking up a magazine.
I swiped the phone on and answered, "Hey, Savanah."
"Mia?" came her voice on the other end of the line. "Are you free? Can we catch up this afternoon?"
I nodded as I said, "Yeah. I'm free. Where do you want to meet up?"
"What about the cafe in the mall?"
"That sounds good. I'll see you in forty-five minutes, then?"
"Yes, please," Savanah said.
A moment later, we hung up. After putting the phone back into my satchel, I turned to Andy and announced, "I have a coffee date."
He raised a brow. "Not with Mr. Maxwell, I'm sure."
I smiled, curious. "How do you know?"
"Because you wouldn't speak like that to him," he said. "You're talking to a girlfriend."
I grinned. "Oh, my baby brother is so perceptive."
Andy eyed me with interest. "You've made a friend?"
I nodded my head, a big grin playing about my lips. "Her name is Savanah White. She's very pretty and nice." Then I thought, And she's stuck in a pickle just like me. A pet to a billionaire.
Oh God! I prayed William was kind to her. I surely hoped. If not, I'd give that man a piece of my mind.
Andy smiled. "Good for you. I was beginning to wonder if you'd ever make any friends at all."
I folded my arms across my chest and harrumphed in indignation. "How rude. Speak for yourself."
The moment I spoke those words, I cursed myself silently. It hadn't been that long since those so-called friends of his had fucked him up with that two million-dollar loan? I knew it had hurt and upset him greatly, and for me to have brought it up so sarcastically like that, it was uncalled for.
Andy tried not to show just how upset he was. He put the magazine on the bedside table and moved over to sleep, turning his back to me.
I sighed, my heart retching at my own stupidity. "Andy, I'm s
orry. I didn't mean it."
He shook his head. "It's okay, Mia. It's true. Everything was my fault. I was stupid and gullible because I wanted to make money, because I wanted to make things better for us. I was blind..."
I took in a shaky breath. Yes, he'd scarified so much, hadn't he? He'd gone through so much just trying to better our lives. But it had backfired. Life was so unfair.
"I even got you involved," he added. "Some brother I am."
I sat on the side of the bed, pulled him into my arms, and hugged him tight. "It's okay, Andy. It's okay."
He turned to me then, and I noted the anger within his eyes. "But I'm not okay with it, Mia." His voice was hard and hoarse with emotion. "I'm so fucking not okay with it. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't have to be here. You wouldn't have to suffer... You wouldn't have to be in such a weird relationship with Mr. Maxwell."
I frowned and said darkly, "Andy, you listen to me, young man. You're my brother. We've been through thick and thin together. I love you. You know that, right? I would take a bullet for you, you understand?"
Andy's body shook. He nodded as he gritted his teeth. "I love you, too, Mia. I'd take a bullet for you, too. I'd die for you. You mean so much to me... That's why... That's why it hurts me you have to go through shit just because of me."
He tightened his arms about me as I buried my face against his chest.
"I know," I said. "I know. I understand. Please, Andy, don't blame yourself anymore. What's done is done. We can't change the past."
He kissed my forehead. "Five years... It's a long time. What if you start hating it? Being with Mr. Maxwell. Wouldn't it be like when we were with that sick bastard?"
I blinked as tears brewed in my eyes. His words struck deep within my heart. That bastard Andy referred to was Uncle Herbert. The man who'd abused and molested us.
Andy was right. Five years was indeed a long time. What if I started hating being with James? What if I started hating him? Would it be very terrible? Like with Uncle Herbert?
I shook my head. No. No. No. I didn't what to think about that. I didn't want to think what would happen if I started hating James. What I should fear most was the fact that I'd start loving him too much, knowing my love for him was unrequited. That was by far more painful and dangerous, wasn't it? Being so close to him yet feeling so far, having my love go unfulfilled.
I said slowly and carefully, my mind in a muddle, "I don't think I'll ever come to hate James, Andy." I drew myself back and gave my brother a sad smile. "Rather," I said, licking my lips. "Rather... it might be the opposite. I'm so afraid. What if I can't take being with him because... What if I confess and he rejects me? What would happen to our contract then? And I don't want anything to happen until the five years is up because... that means we'd have to find enough money to repay him, and..."
Andy cupped my face. "Mia, stop it."
I lifted my gaze. "But I can't help myself."
Andy squeezed my shoulders tight. "I know it's hard. I know you haven't met many men, so of course you'd fall for him. He has money. He's good-looking. He's kind to you. You've spent a lot of your time with him."
I nodded, knowing where his argument was coming from. Yes, it was true I hadn't met many men. Yes, it was also true James was indeed wealthy, good-looking, and kind to me. And yes, the majority of my time so far was with him. Not to mention the crazy, amazing sex we had.
"It's only natural a girl would fall for that type of man," Andy said. "You're a bit confused at the moment. I know because I was confused as well."
I frowned. "You were? With Matt?"
He nodded. "It was one hell of a misery for me." He sighed. "Fact is I'm still unsure where Matt and I are going."
"So..." I began, feeling a little like he was the wiser one between us in the romance department. "What happened? What did you do?"
"To clear my head?" He chuckled.
I nodded furiously.
"I distanced myself," he replied. "Actually, more like I ran away. I decided I didn't want to see his face."
I nodded in understanding. Perhaps I needed to distance myself from James, too? To clear my head, so to speak?
I glanced at the clock on the wall and noticed it was getter closer to three in the afternoon now.
"I better get going," I said.
Andy nodded.
"Mia," he called out as I was about to depart.
"Yes?" I asked at the door.
He paused for a moment, as if he were considering his words carefully. "You're young. Maybe it's just infatuation."
I nodded. "I know," I said. "Don't worry. I won't do anything stupid."
He smiled. "See you tomorrow, then."
I waved and then left him.
As I was walking toward the lift, my cell dinged, informing me I had a message. Curious as to who it was, I quickly checked it.
The moment I saw James's name on the screen, I smiled in delight. I scanned through the message and felt my heart quickened. As per usual, James was straight to the point, and of course, exuded a sense of demand, even in text message form.
We're going out tonight. Wear something nice. Be ready by seven. See you soon.
James.
After placing my cell phone back into my satchel, I headed into the elevator, all the while wondering where he'd be taking me for dinner this time. I do hope it was a restaurant where they had pasta. Thinking about food made my tummy grumbled, and instantly, I couldn't wait to have afternoon tea with Savanah.
Chapter 23
James
The moment James Maxwell closed the door of their hotel suite behind him, his eyes shifted over and came to rest on his mistress Mia Donovan. His gaze marveled at the slender form that never ceased to fascinate him. Tonight, she wore a sexy cocktail dress made of silk and lace, which hugged her willowy body seductively, showing off her small waist and slender curves. With her hair fashioned up into a loose bun atop her head, she looked alluring, and James was more drawn to her than usual.
Standing there near the door, his features broodingly dark and an arrogant smirk playing about his lips, he eyed the lacy material of the dress. His mind instantly went into a frenzy of wild imagination about how he'd rip that beautifully offensive thing from his mistress's body. Fuck! He had been imagining that since he had laid eyes on her earlier this evening when he had come to pick her up for dinner.
He had told her via text messages to wear something nice, and indeed, this was fucking nice. Enticing, in fact.
Mia turned to look at him then, as if she could sense him watching her. She gave him a tentative smile, a sort of invitation that James didn't miss.
Sparks coursed aggressively throughout his body, and James had to tell himself to calm down. He had to tell his cock to calm down and not spring into arousal at the slightest hint of a smile from that innocent beauty.
He'd have her soon enough. There was no rush.
He relaxed his body as he stood there staring at her, the woman who, unbeknownst to him, had meekly waltzed into his life and tenderly changed him, capturing and imprisoning his heart within her hands.
Mia licked her lips and said, "Thanks for the other day by the way."
She paused, and James waited for her to go further, because he knew there was more.
"I didn't know what came over me. I won't do it again... Crying in front of you I mean."
Bright red creeped across her cheeks as she cast her eyes from his intense stare.
James cocked his head to one side at her statement. He knew she was talking about the other day when they had been on the rooftop of the hospital after she had witness what he assumed was Matt's love confession to Andy. Instantly, the images of that morning flashed in his mind, and he felt something akin to longing and love flourishing within his heart.
Fuck! What the hell is that?
Once again, it came. The dainty aroma of her frangipani scent. The feathery brushes of her hair against his chin as she rested her head against his chest while she was
sobbing. The enticing softness of her body intimately pressed to him as he embraced her. She had felt right in his arms, as if she belonged there.
The embrace had felt so fucking natural, in fact, that it scared the living daylights out of him. But of course, James was a man who was used to being in control. He was a man on top of his world; thus, he was able to constraint his emotions successfully and pretend this lovey-dovey stuff didn't affect him... couldn't affect him.
He wasn't the type of man who allowed his emotions to rule his head. After what he'd gone through... After what Whitney had done to him... Twisting his unconditional love to suit her selfishness. He would never allow his emotions to rule his mind and cloud his judgement ever again.
Fact was James only reserved that type of unconditional love for his daughter Aria. And of course, the unconditional loyalty and affection toward his immediate family, especially his brothers.
As for Mia Donovan? Yes. He definitely had great affection for her. He doted on her. But love?
He immediately dismissed the thought from his mind and came to sit on the couch. He made himself comfortable and crossed one leg over the other as he leaned back against the leather. Sitting there in that dominating position in his three-piece suit, he was powerful, highly dangerous, and fucking sexy.
"Strip for me, Mia," he demanded, his tone deep and hard with an intense erotic edge.
The moment he made the command, Mia swallowed nervously. She tentatively licked her lips again and asked, her voice soft and barely above a whisper, "Are we doing it?"
"Yes," came his blunt reply. "Are you not up to it tonight?"
She quickly shook her head. "That's not it," she said. "But you could have told me it's more of a routine of sorts, this sex thing between us. It's like almost every night, isn't it? Is it even normal to have so much sex?"
That made him smile with amusement. "It's normal where I'm concerned."
She twisted her lips at his statement. "Then I don't think you're normal, James."
He laughed, which made her scowl at him. Fuck, he thought, she's cute when she frowns.
James said, once he had managed to calm his laughter, "I don't want to be a normal man where you're concerned, Mia. Don't you think I'm special to you?"