LETTER LVI
MISS HOWE, TO MISS CLARISSA HARLOWE TUESDAY, APRIL 25.
Be comforted; be not dejected; do not despond, my dearest andbest-beloved friend. God Almighty is just and gracious, and gives nothis assent to rash and inhuman curses. Can you think that Heaven willseal to the black passions of its depraved creatures? If it did, malice,envy, and revenge would triumph; and the best of the human race, blastedby the malignity of the worst, would be miserable in both worlds.
This outrageousness shows only what manner of spirit they are of, andhow much their sordid views exceed their parental love. 'Tis all owingto rage and disappointment--disappointment in designs proper to befrustrated.
If you consider this malediction as it ought to be considered, a personof your piety must and will rather pity and pray for your rash father,than terrify yourself on the occasion. None bug God can curse; parentsor others, whoever they be, can only pray to Him to curse: and suchprayers can have no weight with a just and all-perfect Being, themotives to which are unreasonable, and the end proposed by them cruel.
Has not God commanded us to bless and curse not? Pray for your father,then, I repeat, that he incur not the malediction he has announced onyou; since he has broken, as you see, a command truly divine; while you,by obeying that other precept which enjoins us to pray for them thatpersecute and curse us, will turn the curse into a blessing.
My mother blames them for this wicked letter of your sister; and shepities you; and, of her own accord, wished me to write to comfort you,for this once: for she says, it is pity your heart, which was so noble,(and when the sense of your fault, and the weight of a parent's curseare so strong upon you,) should be quite broken.
Lord bless me, how your aunt writes!--Can there be two rights and twowrongs in palpable cases!--But, my dear, she must be wrong: so they allhave been, justify themselves now as they will. They can only justifythemselves to themselves from selfish principles, resolving to acquit,not fairly to try themselves. Did your unkind aunt, in all the tediousprogress of your contentions with them, give you the least hope of theirrelenting?--Her dark hints now I recollect as well as you. But why wasany thing good or hopeful to be darkly hinted?--How easy was it for her,who pretended always to love you; for her, who can give such flowinglicense to her pen for your hurt; to have given you one word, one line(in confidence) of their pretended change of measures!
But do not mind their after-pretences, my dear--all of them serve butfor tacit confessions of their vile usage of you. I will keep youraunt's secret, never fear. I would not, on any consideration, that mymother should see her letter.
You will now see that you have nothing left but to overcome allscrupulousness, and marry as son as you have an opportunity. Determineto do so, my dear.
I will give you a motive for it, regarding myself. For this I haveresolved, and this I have vowed, [O friend, the best beloved of myheart, be not angry with me for it!] 'That so long as your happiness isin suspence, I will never think of marrying.' In justice to the man Ishall have, I have vowed this: for, my dear, must I not be miserable,if you are so? And what an unworthy wife must I be to any man who cannothave interest enough in my heart to make his obligingness a balance foran affliction he has not caused!
I would show Lovelace your sister's abominable letter, were it to me. Ienclose it. It shall not have a place in this house. This will enter himof course into the subject which you now ought to have most in view.Let him see what you suffer for him. He cannot prove base to such anexcellence. I should never enjoy my head or my senses should thisman prove a villain to you!--With a merit so exalted, you may havepunishment more than enough for your involuntary fault in that husband.
I would not have you be too sure that their project to seize you isover. The words intimating that it is over, in the letter of thatabominable Arabella, seem calculated to give you security.--She onlysays she believes that design is over.--And I do not yet find from MissLloyd that it is disavowed. So it will be best, when you are in London,to be private, and, for fear of the worst, to let every direction to bea third place; for I would not, for the world, have you fall into thehands of such flaming and malevolent spirits by surprize.
I will myself be content to direct you at some third place; and I shallthen be able to aver to my mother, or to any other, if occasion be, thatI know not where you are.
Besides, this measure will make you less apprehensive of theconsequences of their violence, should they resolve to attempt to carryyou of in spite of Lovelace.
I would have you direct to Mr. Hickman, even your answer to this. I havea reason for it. Besides, my mother, notwithstanding this particularindulgence, is very positive. They have prevailed upon her, I know, togive her word to this purpose--Spiteful, poor wretches! How I hate inparticular your foolish uncle Antony.
I would not have your thought dwell on the contents of your sister'sshocking letter; but pursue other subjects--the subjects before you.And let me know your progress with Lovelace, and what he says to thisdiabolical curse. So far you may enter into this hateful subject. Iexpect that this will aptly introduce the grant topic between you,without needing a mediator.
Come, my dear, when things are at worst they will mend. Good often comeswhen evil is expected.--But if you despond, there can be no hopes ofcure. Don't let them break your heart; for that is plain to me, is nowwhat some people have in view for you to do.
How poor to withhold from you your books, your jewels, and your money!As money is all you can at present want, since they will vouchsafeto send your clothes, I send fifty guineas by the bearer, enclosed insingle papers in my Norris's Miscellanies. I charge you, as you love me,return them not.
I have more at your service. So, if you like not your lodgings or hisbehaviour when you get to town, leave both them and him out of hand.
I would advise you to write to Mr. Morden without delay. If he intendsfor England, it may hasten him. And you will do very well till he cancome. But, surely Lovelace will be infatuated, if he secure not hishappiness by your consent, before that of Mr. Morden's is made needfulon his arrival.
Once more, my dear, let me beg of you to be comforted. Manage withyour usual prudence the stake before you, and all will still be happy.Suppose yourself to be me, and me to be you, [you may--for your distressis mine,] and then you will add full day to these but glimmering lightswhich are held out to you by
Your ever affectionate and faithful ANNA HOWE.
I hurry this away by Robert. I will inquire into the truth of youraunt's pretences about the change of measures which she says theyintended in case you had not gone away.